


Canswap

by FanofBttf



Series: Future Phineas and Ferb [4]
Category: Phineas and Ferb
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Dimension Travel, Established Relationship, F/M, Mind Projection, POV First Person, Semi-Canonical Character, Sibling Incest, Unreliable Narrator
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-12
Updated: 2017-10-15
Packaged: 2018-08-14 17:55:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 19
Words: 92,924
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8023501
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FanofBttf/pseuds/FanofBttf
Summary: When Phineas Flynn's new 'mind transmitter' backfires on his lover/sister in about the worst way, it's not just technical constraints and the Fletchers' ill-timed family holiday which get in the way of him fixing it - having a version of Candace around who isn't into her brother also doesn't help. But of course, Phineas' own sister also has plans to fix the mess. First person narrative, Candace's POV. Takes place about twenty years after Fear, Loving and Secrets in the Tri-State Area.





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> The story you have before you at the moment is a sequel to Fear, Loving and Secrets in the Tri-State Area. In a way. You see, this story takes place about twenty years in the future compared to FLSITTSA, and is thus set in an entirely different environment (including the occasional reference to slightly more mature themes - nothing major, but still something you should be aware of). Where FLSITTSA establishes Phineas and Candace's relationship, this story is set in a future in which they have been a couple for years, which creates entirely different challenges - and yet, as the characters will discover, some things do stay the same, and underlying sets of assumptions are about to be challenged from both sides when Phin and Candy get into contact with versions of themselves whose lives developed entirely differently. In a way it's as much of a story as it is a character study, even more so than FLS was, and it is one which could very well shake up our protagonists' lives in various small and bigger ways.
> 
> Phineas and Candace will be the main characters, but a fair amount of attention will also be paid to their kids. Ferb and Isabella, by contrast, are characters who will be in the story but take more of a backseat. Just so you know that upfront. Also, this is my first time writing a full-length story in first person narrative, and it's from Candace's POV. Ergo, the story's narration will be about as reliable as Candace telling a story can be... which is not very. Just so you know that in advance. Also, I came up with the title rather easily for once and I actually kinda like it because it compasses what happens in the story so well, so even if I acknowledge it sounds a bit silly I'm not changing it.
> 
> Well, I guess that's about it. If there is anything you want to ask about the story, something you don't agree with, or if you just want to express positive or negative sentiments about the whole tale, please review!

_**Prologue ******_

_Tuesday, June 29th 2037_  
_05:00 PM  
_ _Danville_

Of all the strains housewives around the country had to endure, I thought wryly, serving as a guinea pig for their spouse’s experiments usually wasn’t one of them.

I leaned back and tried to relax, but relaxing wasn’t easy when you have a helmet on your head and wires running from it in every direction, complete with someone leaning over you every once in a while. Of course I was willing to cut Phineas some slack, but this was taking forever. “Did you fix the problem yet?” I asked, straining my eyes to try to see what he was working on.

My brother leaned back up and turned around to face me. Although his usual smile was in place, there was a curve to his brows that indicated he didn’t really know how this was going to end. “I _think_ we have now” he replied. “I’m not sure, though. This is really sensitive equipment.”

I wanted to add that it wasn’t just the equipment that was sensitive but I was as well, but I knew that would hardly be fair. Phineas was doing his best to look out for me. “So what should I do now?” I asked. “Just try to relax and concentrate on reaching out to other worlds?”

Phineas shrugged. “I think it would be the most sensible if you just tried to focus on yourself and your life experiences. Who you are, and what made you the person you are today. Maybe you should focus on one specific dimension first – how about the one we travelled to the day we first met Dr. Doof and all had our minds erased? Of course that dimension was in a bad shape at that point, but things might have cleared up since and I wouldn’t mind getting to hear from them again. Then again, that dimension was relatively easy to access going clockwise and I have no idea what the extents of mental projection are, and it would be a shame to waste it if that method could yield us greater results. You just have to consider fundamental life issues and your brainwaves amplified into a frequency by the helmet should be able to break through the protective bubble of our dimension and…”

Of all the strains housewives around the country had to endure, losing their lover half-way through a conversation to techno babble probably wasn’t normally one either.

I tried to block Phineas’ words out of my mind as I focused on the invention. It really was an amazing piece of work – a machine with which we would be able to connect with the minds of our counterparts in other universes. I’d been skeptical when my brother first proposed it, but later his enthusiasm actually succeeded in getting me carried away a little too. Which probably wasn’t something I should have mentioned out loud, because it made Phineas decide that I could test it for him – and of course, once he’d looked at me with puppy dog eyes and asked nicely, there was no way I could have ever said no. And given that I had somehow managed to make contact with a zebra from another dimension in which my name was Kevin when I was just a teenager, I suppose that it made some sense to ask me for something involving making contact with other dimensions through brainwaves – apparently, I was a natural at it.

But never mind _why_ I had ended up here, the point now was to achieve something with it. I tried very hard to concentrate on reaching out to other worlds – the second dimension first of all, because despite what Phineas had just been saying (or at least what I think he’d been saying) I firmly believed in going the easy way first. I’d been wondering what became of them since we left them anyway. The other me had been amazing as resistance leader, but integrating into civilian life again could have changed a lot about her personality. And what about Phineas and Ferb, whom she’d sought to protect rather than bust? I remembered recommending Jeremy Johnson to her at the time because he was still my boyfriend then, and it made me wonder whether she actually took me up on that or – as I thought when glancing over at Phineas – like me, she’d found the love of her life a little closer to home. I couldn’t imagine the thought of not being with him, but I guess a hypothetical version of me who had ended up with Jeremy after all might not be able to imagine being with Phineas (then again, there was no way _that_ would have worked out in real life given the strains my and Jeremy’s relationship had been under). I had to hand it to my brother – this really was fascinating material.

And yet, it just wasn’t working.

After five minutes of lying down and being anxiously watched without the machine doing anything, or feeling anything more than a growing headache, I sat up and forcefully removed the helmet. “This isn’t working out, Phineas” I said stringently. “Maybe we should just wait until Ferb gets back. You always enjoy working together with him, don’t you?”

I felt a little bad for pulling that card, but it was necessary in this situation. Phineas sighed and nodded. “Working with Ferb is the best – I just wished we could have worked all this out before he got back” he said. “Well, it’s not like we haven’t got anything else to do at the office the next few days.”

I nodded, pulling my legs over the side of the lab bed. Phineas immediately rushed to hold my arm as I tried to stand up – and he was right to do so, given how dizzy I felt – and I gave him a grateful smile. “What time is it now, anyway?”

Phineas glanced at the clock. “It’s past five – too late to get any other important things done. Why don’t you get the car, I’ll check whether anyone else in the building lost track of the time.”

I nodded, still not entirely stable on my feet. My head was pounding. Was this normal? An uneasy chill came up to me but I dismissed it. I was too old to panic over things that didn’t require panic. Keeping our relationship secret, taking care of the kids, enjoying my job… those were things that mattered. An after-effect of the mind transmitter wasn’t. I carefully shook my head, and to my relief I noticed the fog in my head was clearing up. Not as much as I would have wanted it to, but it’d have to do.

I got up the stairs and through the hallways to exit Flynn-Fletcher Incorporated. There was still some light on in the hallway, and I saw a lone secretary still sitting at the desk. She gave me something that was probably meant to resemble a smile. “See you tomorrow, miss Flynn. Has your brother left the building yet?”

I tried not to automatically grit my teeth. “No, but he should be here shortly. Good night, Kirsty.”

I stalked out of the building without saying another word and tried to relax. Seriously, I had thought I’d be over the whole Kirsty Huntingdon thing by now. I tracked down the car in the seemingly endless parking lot and found out that Phineas had somehow already beat me to the punch.

“Are you okay?” he asked me as I shuffled into the driver’s seat. “I figured I’d be the one upset because the machine didn’t work, but I’m mostly fine while you look like something’s bothering you.”

I shook my head and pulled the car into gear. “I’m fine. Just… I don’t know. Minor stuff. I’d tell you about it if it was important.”

Phineas gave me a skeptical look, but he shrugged and leaned back as I drove the car back home. Unlike some other cities Danville was fairly quiet at this time of day, and it made me feel a sense of appreciation for what I had. Home, family, a steady job which I enjoyed and earned me good money – seriously, I shouldn’t be overstrain over such minor things. Phineas’ arm around my shoulders admittedly helped clear my mind of those worries too. Seriously, Isabella is always talking about how attentive Ferb is, but if she thinks Phineas isn’t then she really is underestimating him. Now there’s a new thought.

We got home after only about five minutes and headed inside. Xavier was playing a video game, while Amanda was watching the news. They both looked up at our arrival. “How did the experiment go?” Xavier asked eagerly, speaking up even before his father had had a chance to close the door. The curious glint in his eyes made me smile. Our little dork.

The kids are so different and yet they still manage to get along well. Amanda is our eldest – she’s thirteen years old now and already showing the first signs of puberty. Although on the surface it looks like she takes after me, there are a lot of issues on which she’s actually more like Phineas. Mandy is a lot calmer than I used to be at her age, and she gets really upset when people lie to her. Not just annoyed, but really disturbed, the way Phineas used to get back in the day when someone would break his trust. Amanda is a romantic by nature, something she definitely took from me, and she seems to be a natural at flirting, the source of which… leaves both of us stumped, to be honest. She’s creative, not in the same way her brother and father are but she does have some clever non-project-related ideas at times. When she grows up, I think she’s going to be something related to gardening. She absolutely loves flowers, which is another trait with a mysterious origin.

As for Xavier… he’s almost ten now, and he’s a lot like Phineas. They look alike, apart from Xavier’s orange hair, and they share the same basic optimistic outlook on life. And yet, anyone calling Xavier a carbon copy of his father would be completely off the mark. He’s just too insecure and easily stressed out for that. He doesn’t have the same natural overweight around his group of friends as Phineas always seemed to have over ours, but he’s a great kid and he always notices when someone is feeling left out or has their feelings hurt. Even now, that’s something Phineas tends to trample over, considering that given how happy he is all the time, it’s hard for him to understand that others may not be.

But sometimes, despite all differences, it does feel like we’re looking at younger versions of ourselves, and now that Xavier was so ecstatic about the mind transmitter Phineas knew it would disappoint him to tell his son what happened, precisely because he would have been the same way as a kid. “We… haven’t been able to achieve success yet” he said carefully. “We still might tomorrow, though! There’s definitely some potential there.”

Amanda looked away from the news channel for a moment. “Your invention didn’t work?” she asked. “What happened?”

Phineas and I exchanged glances. “I don’t know” I replied. “I was supposed to establish a link with one of my counterparts from another dimension, but all I felt was a killer headache.” A headache which was coming back now that I was talking about it, actually, disproving my earlier hopes of it fading away. “Which reminds me, I’d better take some aspirin. Did you guys get dinner?”

“It’s on the kitchen counter” Xavier replied. I nodded, and headed to the bathroom.

When you look at the wealth Phineas and Ferb immersed due to their inventions, the fact that we were living in a three-story-house might have struck some people as odd. Nevertheless, this property, located near the heart of Danville and right next to Ferb and Isabella’s home, was one we considered quite the catch when Phineas and I first discussed permanent homes, and by now it’s the place we’ve raised our kids and we wouldn’t want to live anywhere else. Not to mention the fact that the limited size made running a quick errand easier. I’d hate to live in a place where you would have to search ten minutes just to find the bathroom. Especially in light of my current headache but also because of nightly toilet visits that really sounded like a bad idea.

The aspirin relieved me a bit, and it was with a more upbeat mood that I joined my family at the kitchen table. The fries were already apportioned out across the table (with Xave and Mandy making sure to snatch the best snacks for themselves, as usual) so it wasn’t long before we were digging in. Almost immediately, though, I caught Amanda staring at me with a frown on her face. “What?”

“You know, Mom,” she said casually, “if we had gone on holiday just like Uncle Ferb and Aunt Isabella, you might have relaxed enough to not have to worry about headaches.”

I sighed. “Mandy…”

“A-man-da.”

I tried to be a good mother and not roll my eyes, while Phineas took over the honors of talking some sense into our daughter. (He’s always been much better at reaching out to her than I have, to be honest.) “You do remember why we can’t go on the same kind of holidays as other people, don’t you Amanda?” my partner said gently, even though it was clear from his voice alone that he shared our daughter’s sense of disappointment.

“I know, I know…” Amanda replied solemnly. “I just don’t want to be cooped up in Danville all summer. Not that I don’t love this town, but… why can’t you invent something that will let us go out on holiday as a family?”

To be honest, it frustrated me a little that although Amanda was of course addressing Phineas, she and her brother were keeping half an eye on me – as was Phineas himself, for that matter. I knew they weren’t fully convinced of the risks to our secret relationship a holiday posed, and Phineas especially tended to go along with my wishes just to keep me happy. Which was sweet of course, but I wanted him to realize the dangers himself. I mean, we’d only told our parents a few years ago, for crying out loud, and that had involved a lot of stress and worries about how they would take it already. Random strangers on a cruise ship discovering what we were? There was no way I was going to risk that.

“We _could_ just build a ship ourselves and sail around the world with that” Phineas replied. “There’d be no risks of anyone finding out then – well, apart from satellites, but we run that risk in our own backyard as well. But weren’t you the one who insisted that we should get to visit other countries and cultures? In this situation we would still have to stay on the ship all the time, because your mom and I can’t exactly be your parents if we’re surrounded by tourists who might know me by sight.”

“Who undoubtedly _will_ know you by sight” I couldn’t help but add. Seriously, even Phineas shouldn’t be so modest to think that only a few people would recognize the world’s most famous inventor. Even when we were kids he was a local celebrity, and it has only gotten worse since.

Amanda sighed. “I guess so” she muttered. “Maybe going out on a ship with just the four of us would be fun after all. I’d like to practice my diving skills.”

“Or we could build a memory gun to make sure anyone who sees you together forgets about it” Xavier mused.

Phineas and I both frowned. “I don’t think so” Phineas replied. “We might end up missing some people who recognize us but don’t tell us so, and with photographers we’d have to erase their cameras as well. It’s just too impractical.”

Of course Phineas was going to focus on practicalities, rather than the more obvious ethical aspect of forcibly erasing someone’s mind. Sometimes, I wondered whether he really was in touch with the world outside him. And yet, I stuck with him throughout.

I suppose that could be what love is. Annoyance, but never fundamental disagreements. Accepting that Phineas wasn’t going to change unless he wanted to change, and that all I could do was encourage him to do so rather than force him. It wasn’t always easy to accept that, but it gave me a sense of inner peace and made me see through his problems and through to the brilliant guy that lay underneath.

It worked. Somehow, we made it work.

The rest of the dinner table banter was filled with more conversations about going on a family vacation, about Xavier and Amanda’s day at school and (of course) a little about inventing. Sometimes I wondered why I wasn’t more annoyed by all the talk about science, when that clearly wasn’t my forte. The answer, of course, was simple – regardless of the fact that my main interests lay elsewhere, I was still a Flynn. No matter how hard I’d always tried to bust the boys, it was a part of my genes to be involved in the whole craziness. Even Amanda – who was probably the most level-headed member of the entire family, and the one who was least into achieving the impossible, not that those two things necessarily had the same cause – liked participating in what Xavier and Fred did.

The thought that all this was a family thing warmed my heart for some reason, and it gave me another reason to feel good about myself that day. Perhaps that’s just me looking back at it from a distance, but I think that night I just felt at ease with everything. Phineas worked on trying to figure out what could be wrong with his calculations, while I watched a movie with the kids and failed to convince him to come and watch as well. It irked me a little, but I knew how important this was to him and that there would be many such family nights again.

By eleven PM, the movie was over and Mandy (or Amanda, as she herself has insisted ever since she started puberty) and Xavier were on the verge of falling asleep on the couch. No wonder – they had had a particularly long day at school, and although Xavier is always energized by watching a movie since he’s such a nerd (I swear, he can recite entire TV show episodes just after two showings and casually points out details others wouldn’t spot on a sixth viewing) he got all the more tired when the adrenalin ran out. And yet, they still wanted a goodnight story.

At thirteen and nine, Xavier and Amanda are probably a little old for bedtime stories (not that being a little old or a little young for something has ever stopped anyone in this family before). But Phineas really is a great storyteller. I forgot to mention that earlier, but I think that’s another thing Amanda might have picked up from him. Whenever my brother tells a well-known story, often a fairy tale, he always manages to make it funny because of the twists he adds to it and the way he lampshades everything that happens. Most people would take, say, Sleeping Beauty getting that pinprick from the spinning wheel for granted as an element of the story. Phineas gets into entire narratives about why her father didn’t try to introduce a better alternative for a spinning wheel, and before we know it he and Xavier have jotted down several project ideas, while he and Amanda have come up with a way to fix the flaws in the original story and pulled into a wholly different direction.

… I realize it doesn’t sound like much, but you have to hear it first-hand to appreciate it. I never leave the kids’ room at night without a smile on my face, even after a horror story because Phineas is the only one who can tell those in an upbeat way and _still_ make it scary. Storytellers around the world must be yearning for that secret.

The story Phineas told that day was a short one, though, probably inspired by the fact that we were both very, very tired. My partner trudged up the stairs with some of his usual joy de vivre having left him, and I just had to speak to him about it when we got into our night clothes. “You haven’t managed to figure out what was wrong with the machine, have you?” I asked sympathetically.

Phineas sat down on his side of the bed, stared at me and shook his head. “I feel like I’m close, but I’m not there yet. It’s just so frustrating.”

I sat down on my side and reached over to put a hand on his shoulder. “Hey, I don’t figure everything out instantly either, but that doesn’t mean I never do. You just have to keep trying and you’ll figure it out eventually. Or you won’t, and that won’t be such a big deal either. Getting to communicate with other dimensions would be cool, but it’s not your life’s work.”

Phineas nodded. “I know, but my motto has always been that everyone can do what he wants to do, and facing the fact that here’s something scientific I just can’t figure out clashes with that. _Your_ motto, on the other hand, is… I don’t know, what would you say drives you in life?”

“A wish to get through the drudgery of everyday existence” I said dryly. “But seriously Phin, it’s not a big deal if you won’t figure it out. There are some things you’ve already achieved in your life which are much more important than this.”

“Like the fusion reactor?” Phineas guessed. “But that was with Ferb’s help…”

“Like Xavier and Amanda” I corrected him. “And, in a different way, me.”

Phineas plopped his head down on his pillow. “You have a point there” he muttered. “I never thought as getting to be with you or having kids as accomplishments, but maybe I should.”

I smiled, laying down as well. “Of course you should. Don’t forget how long it took you to win me over. I was really stubborn and neurotic back in the day.”

“You’re still stubborn and neurotic now, Candace.”

I raised an eyebrow. “And here I was thinking we were going to be nice to each other tonight.”

“I _am_ being nice to you. I’m just stating the facts.”

I shook my head with a fond smile. “I know. But stop worrying about the mind transmitter, okay? Just be your upbeat self and you’ll fall asleep in no time, and tomorrow morning you will know exactly how to fix your problems.”

Phineas grinned at me. “You’re right, Candace. Tomorrow is a new day, after all.” He kissed me on the cheek and lay down on his side. I lay down on my back, glancing at him with a smile on my face. He was right. Tomorrow was a new day.

But what kind of day it would end up being was something I could have never imagined then.


	2. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The real meat of the story, as they call it, starts here, and I think it might have already been obvious to some from the last chapter that this was what it could be heading towards. We'll be switching POV's from here on as you'll soon discover, just as we switch between -verses. The name of this universe should leave no doubt which episode it's primarily based upon, even if I incorporated some elements of what we see in Quantum Boogaloo as well (elements which, unlike in the 'regular' FLS-verse, had no reason to change here).

**_ Chapter One _ **

Wednesday, June 30th 2037  
04:00 AM  
Danville  
AYA-Verse 

The first thing I noticed when I jolted awake in the middle of that night was that the bed was too soft.

Until that particular night it had never occurred to me how strange it is to feel that something is different, to instinctively know something has happened without having any discernible reason to think so. You just know, and once the conviction has taken root of your brain you won’t be able to shake it off. As it turned out, I was entirely right to take my realization seriously.

I snapped awake so suddenly that it felt like jolting awake from a nightmare if not for the fact that I couldn’t remember anything really unpleasant. I made a befuddled scan of my surroundings, but everything there seemed normal. Although the entire room was pitch black, there was no doubt that I was in my bed and under the covers. I had no idea why I should have even doubted that, really.

It was that strangely soft bed and the distinct feeling of wrongness that made me run my hands over my skin, as if expecting to find something different there, and that lead to my decision to reach for my night lamp. It would provide only the barest light, but it would neither require me to use my voice nor flood the room with light, which meant that I didn’t run the chance of waking Phineas. I knew he was a fast sleeper, but I still didn’t want to take any chances. After my skepticism with regards to his ideas that afternoon, I really felt that I owed him a good night’s rest.

As my arm continued flailing around aimlessly over my night stand, something became abundantly clear even to my befuddled brain: there was no night lamp. My initial assumption was that I must have knocked it to the ground by mistake, but after a cursory search of the floor for a full minute yielded nothing, I was forced to admit that something was up. Either the kids had had an unusual concept of a prank, my night lamp had somehow been zapped into another universe, or something stranger was going on.

After so many years of growing up with my brothers’ particular brand of crazy, it should come as no surprise that the last option seemed the most likely to me.

I was about to call for the lights to turn on when a shuffle next to me reminded me that I was not alone. I felt a mixture of concern that I’d woken him up and relief that at least now I was no longer alone, until an unfamiliar voice said: “Candace?”

My reaction was instant. I shrieked, flailed backwards – and then there was suddenly nothing under me anymore. I dropped on the floor, hard, barely sparing a moment to feel relief that I hadn’t landed more unfortunately.

The lights turned on, and the concerned face that I found looking at me belonged to about the last person I would have expected. I did recognize it right away, of course, and in retrospect I should’ve recognized his voice… but in my defense, no one would expect their ex-boyfriend of twenty-plus years to suddenly be lying next to them. It was like a bizarre movie plot.

Jeremy Johnson looked at me, his face clearly concerned but otherwise similar to the last time I’d seen him a couple of months ago. “Is something wrong, Candace?”

It baffled me that he could be acting so normal about this, as if waking up next to women who weren’t his wife was something he did every day (and maybe it was, what did I know). “What are you…” I looked around, realized the room was unfamiliar and corrected myself. “What am I doing here? Where am I?”

The expression on Jeremy’s face turned even more concerned, uncomfortable and distressed… perhaps even pained… than it had been before. “Candace, you’re home.”

I stared at him, all my thoughts of home – Maple Drive, my student dorm, my first apartment, and of course my and Phineas’ current home – fluttering through my mind, and wondering who Jeremy thought he was to be able to tell me what my home was. Above all, I was confused. “I… don’t live here?” It sounded more like a question, not because I was personally doubting that but because suddenly I wasn’t sure whether Jeremy knew.

Jeremy put a hand on my shoulder. I flinched at the unfamiliar touch. “Candace, you’re home with me. I don’t know what problems you’re having, but if you’re having a relapse maybe you should talk to Dr. Baumer.”

“Jeremy.” My arm shot up and I firmly held his hand. “I know it must sound crazy, but please explain this to me. You’re saying that…” I took a deep breath before continuing with the question that I secretly really didn’t want to hear the answer to. “…I live here with you?”

From his expression, Jeremy definitely thought I sounded crazy, but he still nodded. “Candace, we’ve been married for over a decade now. Are you sure you don’t remember?”

I didn’t, of course, remember, and by now I was certain that this wasn’t something I could or should remember, because to me, it had simply never happened. It was like I’d just stepped into a whole other life. Another world, almost…

Wait.

I automatically clenched my fists in frustration. The thought transmitter. Of course. How could Phineas and I have been so foolish to think it wouldn’t do anything? My brother’s inventions always worked, just not always the way we wanted them to. It had transported me to a whole other world, and now…

…how would I get home? In this alternate world, I was apparently married to Jeremy. That unexpected reunion with my old crush was weird enough, but the thought that he seemed on the verge of committing me for forgetting all that was worse, as was the fact that I had no idea what to do. I couldn’t just call Phineas, could I? I supposed I could try to reach his local self, but I had no idea whether I even wanted to open that can of worms…

“Candace?” Jeremy snapped his fingers in front of me. “Are you okay? Should I call a doctor?”

“No, no!” I rushed to tell him. “I’m fine. It was just… I don’t know. I’m feeling better already. I remember everything now?” I didn’t intend to end that sentence with a question mark, but somehow it happened anyway.

Jeremy frowned. “If you remember everything, what are our kids’ names?”

It was a guess, of course. But given the fact that I’d had the same names in mind since reading them in a baby name book when I was eight, it was all a matter of sounding confident. “Xavier and Amanda.”

Jeremy’s frown lifted for a moment, but then it returned. “And Fred.”

“And Fred, of course” I added nervously. I had no idea why we would have a third child, nor why we would name him after Ferb and Isabella’s son, but I was familiar enough with the whole concept of other worlds to know that anything could happen. Phineas and I might have just as easily had a third child as well, and it wasn’t like Amanda came along entirely planned. I cleared my throat and looked up at Jeremy, exuding confidence. “My parents are Lawrence Fletcher and Linda Flynn – my biological father’s name was Andrew Flynn, but he died in a lab accident when I was only seven. My brothers’ names are Phineas and Ferb. What else do you want to hear?”

It was another gamble to mention all those little details, but it paid off enough to cover for me not knowing about Fred. “Well, it looks like you’re at least calming down now” Jeremy said softly. “But Candace, you just basically forgot who you were. Even if you are fine now… are you sure we shouldn’t give you-know-what a try? This is serious, sweetheart.”

I had no idea what he was talking about, but it definitely didn’t sound good. I hoisted myself up to sit on the bed and decided to try an argument that would _have_ to sound familiar to him, or the other me wouldn’t be me. “I know this is more than just a random memory lapse” I agreed thoughtfully. “You know what? It wouldn’t surprise me if my brothers were behind this.”

If it was at all possible for Jeremy to frown deeper, he did so just then. “Candace, you haven’t tried to blame Phineas and Ferb for your problems for years now. Are you sure you’re okay?”

“I’m fine” I replied, although in reality I wasn’t due to that killer headache. “I’m fine, I just can’t shake the thought that they could help me.”

“Candace…” Jeremy said, sighing. “Whatever else your brothers may be, they’re not psychologists. Not to mention I’m not even sure either of them is in town.”

“I could always give Phineas a call” I insisted, an idea forming in my head to at least get out of this house. “In the morning, of course. And if it doesn’t work, there’s no harm done. Just trust me on this. I’ve got a feeling that it’ll help.”

Jeremy pondered that for a moment or two. “No harm done, all right” he mused. “You will remember to keep yourself under control this time, won’t you? I wouldn’t want you to have to go through all that stress again if you and Phineas end up arguing over what caused this, and it _could_ be bad for your recuperation from the, um, the incident that happened the other day. I… I know we can’t rush these things honey, but I would hate for them to be dragged out for longer than they have to. The kids might suffer under it.”

“I’ll take care of it” I said, trying to smile at him. “Just have a little confidence in me, Jeremy.”

Jeremy sighed. “I know. I’m sorry, sweetie. It’ll be fine.” He gave me a peck on the cheek and rolled over on his side of the bed. “Good night, Candace.”

“Good night” I stammered, partly surprised that I’d actually gotten away with it and by the fact that he had just kissed me on the cheek. It was… okay. I hadn’t gotten a kiss from Jeremy in two decades, and it was hardly something that brought back long forgotten memories (maybe a kiss on the lips would have been better for that purpose). All it did was make me wonder why I’d ever been so obsessed with him in the first place. Sure, Jeremy was cool, but I remembered him as being someone amazing, and that wasn’t exactly the first description I had in mind for the rather average guy lying next to me.

I lay down with a sense of discomfort and a sudden longing to be home. What could possibly have gone wrong with the project, and more importantly, could Phineas fix it? Being here in bed with someone who was, for all intents and purposes, a stranger would get weird really fast. But I had no idea what I could possibly do to help hasten my return. It was so ironic – just half a day ago we’d been trying to establish contact with other worlds, and now I was in a wholly different universe and I could only think about getting home.

And who knew. Maybe the situation would automatically reverse itself when I fell asleep again. It wasn’t something I had high hopes for, but it was a possibility that had to be taken into account and which I used as a motivation as I tried to fall asleep again.

It might have taken me up to half an hour to finally fall asleep, which given the circumstances wasn’t even as bad as it might have been. I slept uneasily and dreamed of wandering through all sorts of different worlds, some of which included being chased by monsters (now there was a kind of dream I hadn’t had in years). I woke up two more times before it was finally morning, though, and as I didn’t have anything else to do and it was becoming apparent that I was in this world for the long haul, I started to come up with a plan.

First things first: I couldn’t tell Jeremy anything. I… I didn’t know what I was going to say to him, anyway. I’m from another dimension? In the world I’m from, I’m in a steady, long-term romantic relationship with my brother and you haven’t been in the picture for years? Well, given our past, he might have bought the first one, but I doubted he’d go for the second. It was just too complicated. Better to stick to impersonating my counterpart there and play the normal housewife until I’d get a chance to slip out.

That was the second order of business: getting to see Phineas, or should I say ‘the other Phineas’. I didn’t know how much of that was subconscious hunkering to return to the comfort of the man I loved, but part of me was convinced he would be able to help. I _could_ wait until my Phineas had figured out what to do, but if the other me kept quiet about who she really was the same way I’d just decided to… well, he wasn’t as oblivious anymore as he used to be. He would figure it out and he would get me back, I was sure of it. But I had no idea how long it would take, and if there was anything I could do to help I was going to do it.

Contacting Phineas would probably be almost as awkward as talking to Jeremy about my back story would have been. One doesn’t simply walk up to their brother and tell him you’re his spouse in your own dimension. He could probably accept it – for all my life, I’ve known Phineas to have a wonderfully open mind – but even so the fact that I didn’t know the first thing about his life here made me hesitate. What would Phineas be like without me? Lonely? Childless, I presumed, with only Ferb for regular company? I didn’t know. I didn’t even know if he would be able to help, but I had to try anyway. Even if it _was_ just because seeing him would bring the comforts of home back.

I was still pondering all that when the alarm clock on Jeremy’s side of the bed went off. It was 7:30, which was just as normal a time for people to get up for work as it was for parents to get up for delivering their kids to school, so it didn’t really tell me anything about his life. In fact, the only thing it did was remind me of my old alarm clock. It’s funny how not having someone around constantly sparks memories of that person anyway. I remembered all too clearly now how I’d programmed Phineas’ catchphrase into my alarm clock to set it for busting time. Looking back, that was the most ridiculously suggestive thing with regards to my obsession with him I’d ever done. With something like that in mind, was it even possible for us not to end up together?

Well, today I might have gotten the answer to that.

Jeremy waking up next to me and giving me what was presumably meant to be just a friendly good morning kiss was all well and good, but it just left me sitting upright in my counterpart’s bed missing my brother. My lover. My soul mate. What would he be doing right now? Could he perhaps have encountered this world’s Candace? I didn’t know. At that moment, the thought just made me all the more uncomfortable.

I was trapped in the most bizarre universe I could have ever imagined. Besides getting out again, nothing would matter.

 


	3. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Same person, same story, different situation, different reactions. And there's also a whole lot of drama and overreaction, largely because this is Candace Gertrude Flynn and we wouldn't have it any other way.

**_ Chapter Two _ **

Wednesday, June 30th 2037  
04:00 AM    
Danville  
FLS-Verse

The first thing I noticed when I woke up that night was that the bed was too hard.

I know it sounds like a trivial thing to get riled up about, but Jeremy and I picked this bed together and we both decided to go for something soft and comforting. It was a decision I don’t regret – what with the kids and work and making the ends meet, we need a place to relax at night.

But this bed, as I mentioned, was hard. Of course that didn’t immediately make me realize what had actually happened. I just thought that maybe I’d worked too hard and thrown my back out. This wasn’t a big deal. Sure, part of me felt like something was up, but the other half just wanted to lean back and get some more sleep. At least I had the next few days off from work, even if the purpose for which I got them still made me uncomfortable. It had only been a small incident after all, one of which I hadn’t had in almost two years, just a slip-up at Mandy’s school… and dang it, I didn’t have to justify everything I did, did I? I was normal. Such incidents did not detract from that.

I shifted in my bed and accidentally bumped against my husband. I mumbled a “sorry” but got no reaction. Then again, Jeremy had always been a sound sleeper.

It’s strange how sometimes when you wake up in the middle of the night, and you know you couldn’t stand on your feet to save your life, you still can’t get back to sleep right away. You’re tired, but not sleepy. I rolled over a few times and yawned, stretching my arms. I almost knocked over something on my nightstand and managed to catch it and put it back before it could fall. It was a night lamp of sorts and… wait, since when did I have a night lamp? Let alone one with… sticky notes?

I didn’t know. Honestly, this was in no way important enough to wake up for. But since the matter was on my mind anyway, I located and flipped on the light switch. After squinting a few times I realized that yup, this was a night lamp, one with at least five sticky notes which all said “glasses” or a synonym thereof. Confused, I rolled over to wake my husband. "Jeremy, do you know why…”

Except I would know that face anywhere.

And that was not Jeremy Johnson.

“Phineas!” I exclaimed. “What the – what on earth are you doing here?”

My brother remained put, which was all the more frustrating because how dare he stay asleep without explaining what he was up to? “Phineas!” I yelled. “Wake up!”

Giving him a shove or two in the side finally made him return to the land of the living. Phineas looked up at me and rubbed his eyes. “Candace? Is something wrong?”

He stared at me as if impromptu sleepovers were the most normal things in the world between siblings who hadn’t regularly seen each other in months – wasn’t he supposed to be at some award ceremony and/or a convention in Switzerland right now? I looked back at him and frowned. “Could you please explain to me what on earth you’re doing in my bed?”

He gave me that same confused look as before, as if he had every right to be here. “Sleeping?” he said. “It’s the middle of the night and the shield is on, so there’s not much point in going over to my bed. It’s not like anyone would spot us here.”

Phineas and I had never really been on the same wavelength, but this time he might have made more sense spouting absolute gibberish. I sighed, determined to avoid getting sucked into tangents and to get to the bottom of this. “Where’s Jeremy?”

Phineas blinked. “Jeremy?”

For goodness’ sake, did he think he could continue to act dumb forever? “Jeremy Johnson! My husband. Where is he?” And what are you doing on his side of our bed?

Phineas stared at me now with an intensity that frightened me a little. “You’re…” He shook his head. “Candace, are you saying you are married to Jeremy Johnson?”

I folded my arms and pulled my legs over the side of the bed, feeling like I had to channel my frustration into _some_ thing. “Yes, and I have been for fifteen years. Don’t act like you don’t know that, Phineas.”

My brother took his head into his hands and groaned. “I should’ve known something would happen” he murmured. “Of course transmission rays of that intensity would have to have an effect…”

Technobabble. Now that was something I hadn’t heard in years. It was also entirely unhelpful. “Mind explaining to me what’s going on?”

Phineas nodded pensively. “Candace, just for the record… you don’t remember anything we talked about last afternoon?”

I sighed. “Phineas, I haven’t properly seen you in months.”

“And you’re married to Jeremy?”

I had no idea where he was going with this. “Yes. Do you have amnesia or something?”

“And to you, I’m… your brother?”

“You’ve been my brother since the day you were born” I said exasperatedly, wondering what was making him behave this way. “I’m sorry, but is there any point to this line of questioning?”

Phineas sighed. “Candace, have you noticed anything unusual about this room thus far, besides me being there?”

I looked around. Now that the initial confusion had passed over, I realized that there were a ton of things I didn’t recognize – the curtains, the way the cabinets were placed, the night lamp and even the carpet pattern. “Well… yeah” I admitted. “There are a lot of things that are different. If I didn’t know any better I’d say it’s a completely different room, but that can’t be it because I know where I went to bed last night, and it’s here…” I looked over at Phineas, suddenly very much that insecure teenage girl who didn’t understand what’s going on and who knew in her heart of hearts that her little brother was reliable and so much smarter than she was. “…right?”

Phineas shook his head. “I’m afraid not. Candace… I’m not sure, but it appears to me that you’re from another dimension and came here by swapping places with the Candace of this dimension… are you familiar with the term?”

“I… of course” I mumbled, remembering Phineas and Ferb (well, just Phineas) had often talked about traveling to other worlds, even if strangely I couldn’t recall them ever _doing_ it. “Are you saying that I’m in a wholly different world, and your sister is back in mine?” Phineas nodded. “I guess that would explain a lot… but not how something like that would happen. Or what you’re doing here, for that matter.” Maybe Other Me gave Phineas a place to stay if he lost his home or something? Although that still wouldn’t explain why he was in my _bed_ …

Phineas nodded. “Well, that’s a long and… unusual story, Candace.” He shuffled on his side of the bed and looked at me. “I don’t know how to tell you this, and Ferb and your counterpart would probably say I should break the news to you gently… but I sleep here. I live here. This is my home just as much as it is yours.”

I stared at him again – I was trying not to, because I knew it was getting repetitive and might give off the impression that I was crazy, but I just couldn’t help it. “So… did you move in with me at some point and just never move out again?” I asked. If I was not with Jeremy in this other world – something I was beginning to realize from the evidence, as much as I hated the thought – I could just see myself taking either of my brothers in to avoid loneliness.

Phineas cleared his throat and gave me a pat on the shoulder. “Not exactly. In your dimension, you’re in a relationship with Jeremy, right?” I nodded. “Well in this world, you’re in a relationship with me.”

His tone of voice was normal and his expression only slightly concerned for my reaction, so it took me a few moments to realize what he’d actually said. My eyes snapped wide open and almost subconsciously I shuffled away from him. “You mean… you mean like siblings, right?” I stammered. Well, stammered… ‘begged’ might have been a better word.

Phineas solemnly shook his head. “Like lovers, Candace.”

“A-and is that because in this world, we were never siblings?”

Another headshake. “We share the same parents, Candace.” A pause. “As do our kids.”

That final thought – ‘our kids’, mine and _Phineas’_ , pushed me over the edge. “No” I whispered. “No, no, NO!” I jumped upright and off the bed before turning towards Phineas. I tried to point at him and tell him the truth, but words were having a hard time coming out of my mouth right now. “How could you… how could I- _she_ … that’s _wrong_ , Phineas! That is so incredibly wrong, if you and I… I don’t even want to think about it!” I was hyperventilating. I momentarily didn’t care. “WHY? HOW! How could you…. I….”

Phineas frowned – or at least I think that’s what he did. “Look, Candace,” he said softly, “I know this must come as a shock to you.”

“That doesn’t even begin to describe it” I murmured. I flinched as he shuffled over the bed, stood up, took a step towards me and tried to reach for my shoulder. Terrified, I backed up against the wall. “Stay away from me” I stammered. “Please.”

Phineas sighed and nodded. “Okay, Candace. It’s all right. I’ll… I’ll keep my distance.”

That was a small relief – a very small one – but I was still smack in the middle of a mental breakdown. “How… you… please.” My voice was a whisper. “Please leave me. I – I don’t think I can take this.”

My brother had an expression on his face that somewhere in the back of my mind I could still identify as ‘hurt’. “Well, this is my bedroom” he said softly. “And although I… I realize you wouldn’t want to see me right now, I still have to help you get home.”

Home. This… this horrible tiding just made me miss it so much more. It felt like being told that all other humans on earth had been living grapefruits all along. But… “Why?” I whispered. “What… how…”

Phineas sat down at the foot of the bed. “It began when we were kids” he said, an odd sense of nostalgia in his voice that just felt so incredibly inappropriate for the situation. “You’d always been special to me, but it was when you were seventeen and obsessing with Jeremy leaving for college that I realized I had romantic feelings for you.”

It was so wrong. Not just in a moral sense, but the story was just plain wrong. It didn’t make any sense compared to my memories and experiences. “What about Isabella?”

My brother frowned. “Isabella Garcia-Shapiro?”

I nodded, my earlier feelings of horror gradually being replaced (well, accompanied might be a better word) by frustration. “Yes! You had a crush on her in high school, remember?”

Phineas blinked. “Really? That’s interesting. In our world, _she_ had a crush on _me_ – until she found out about us, of course.”

I breathed heavily. “This is madness.” He was treating the two like they were equivalent scenario’s in different worlds, as if being married to Isabella or having an incestuous love affair with m – his sister were in any way similar, stable alternatives to each other. Of all possible dimensions, I had to end up here. I sat down and closed my eyes, putting my hands over my ears. “This is not happening, this is not happening, this is not happening…”

“Candace.” It was Phineas’ voice, and my treacherous ears listened to him regardless of what my mind wanted. “I know this must be tough for you, but you can’t run away from your problems. You want to get home, don’t you? You don’t have to accept us, but please just give me the time of day to talk to you.”

I looked up at him, trying to see him as just a normal version of my brother who could help me out. Did I have any other alternative, I wondered? I could contact Ferb, but I had no idea where he lived in this dimension or who he was here, he might as well be involved in even worse stuff than… this.

Although at this moment, the only thing worse than this that was coming to my mind was that he could be an axe murderer. And even that was just marginally worse than ‘having kids with his sister’.

I stared at Phineas, wondering whether I could see any signs of attraction to me in his eyes and ugh, this was so messed up, how was it that I even had to consider this, I was never going to be able to look at any family member the same way again… I wished with all my heart that I could run to my panic room back at my parents’ home and hide from everything, but fate was cruel to me today. In the middle of the night and in a house I was unfamiliar with – mine and my brother’s, apparently – I would have nowhere else to go.

I dared to take a peek at Phineas and shuddered. I was no theologian, but despite that I just knew that there was no way this could be right.

Shaking, I put my hands down on the ground and tried to breathe regularly. I felt myself beginning to calm down. This was… doable. It was _manageable_. Sure, I was facing a horror scenario, but I couldn’t hyperventilate or hide in my shell forever because that was what Past Candace would have done. I was an adult now, and I had to deal with this in a mature way (even if part of myself told me that running away _would_ be the mature thing here). And… well, I was a lawyer, for heaven’s sake. I had to defend people I didn’t agree with every other day. This was like that. Something reprehensible, but something I’d have to work with to get home. In that sense, it was just like my job. Sure, maybe work didn’t involve my relative being attracted to me… but maybe I could try to look at it from an outside perspective, right? These people weren’t my brother and me, they were just random people who did bad things but whose help I needed.

I could work with that. Only just barely, but I could.

I stood up, taking a few seconds to catch my bearings, and looked at Other-Phineas. “ _Can_ you help me?”

I could clearly see the relief on his face that I’d decided to be… well, I’m sure he’d put it as ‘reasonable’. For me, it felt somewhere between ‘practical’ and ‘moronic’. “I should” he said softly. “It’ll probably take a while, possibly days – but I’m the one who built the mind transmitter, so I should be able to fix it.” He paused for a moment, but then he forged on. “I’d intended to make contact with parallel universes with it. Your counterpart was supposed to just be able to exchange thoughts with her other selves, but apparently things worked out a little too well.” There was an awkward, probably forced smile on his face. “I… I should be able to get started on fixing that first thing in the morning.”

“I see” I replied. Seriously, the only thing that had really mattered to me there was that he should be able to fix this mess. “I don’t suppose you’d have a spare bed for me, do you?”

Phineas sighed. “As a matter of fact we do, but it’s completely stacked with boxes and other junk right now. And the guest beds in the kids’ room would be too small for you, not to mention that I don’t want to wake them in the middle of the night if we don’t have to.” He glanced over to his nightstand clock, which read 4:16 AM. “But I’ve got some spare pillows we can totally put between us. It won’t be perfect, but I wouldn’t know what else I could do.”

I managed a smile (or I think it was a smile). “No, that’s… fine…” I sat back down on the bed and got underneath the sheets, deliberately facing towards him so that I could keep an eye on him. I knew – hoped? – that that additional ‘security measure’ probably wasn’t necessary, but it somehow still felt safer this way.

Phineas nodded awkwardly, taking the pillow he was laying on and stacking up a pillow wall between us before getting back under the sheets. “Well, good night then” he said softly. “I – I’m really sorry this happened, Candace.”

I muttered something vague in response and he put his head down against his mattress, closing his eyes. I stared at him for a moment and then closed my eyes as well.

I wasn’t likely to get any sleep tonight, sleeping next to a version of my brother who was committing incest with his sister. But that didn’t matter right now. Because acquainting with this version of Phineas, no matter how horrified it made me feel, would help me in getting home.

And when I was trapped in this kind of terrible dystopia, getting home was the only thing that mattered.


	4. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And another chapter. FLS Candace starts implementing her plan to get into contact with Phineas, but it might soon face more difficulties than she had thought it would.

**_Chapter Three_ **

Wednesday, June 30th 2037  
08:00 AM    
Danville  
AYA-Verse

After Jeremy had gotten off bed, I tried to sleep on at first. When that turned out to be practically impossible, around 8 am I finally decided to get up, get dressed in my counterpart’s clothes and face the unknown. After feeling reasonably confident that I wouldn’t pass out at the first weird thing this world would throw at me, I took a deep breath, opened the bedroom door and walked into the rest of the house.

It was a strange experience to be walking around in a home that wasn’t mine, but could have been if my life had just taken a slightly different course. There were all kinds of interior decoration choices that I found myself thinking I could have taken as well, only for me to realize that yes, of course, I had.

First things first: I needed a bathroom break. Fortunately that didn’t end up being the quagmire it could have been. The bathroom was directly opposite the bedroom, just like it was at home. At least the toilets still worked the same way they normally did here, even if there was something about the whole atmosphere of the room and indeed the house that felt… I don’t know, less advanced for some reason. I didn’t know whether that was because I was used to living with a scientist or whether there was indeed something bigger going on.

When I got down the stairs, a whiff of pancake scent greeted me. I walked straight through into what I presumed must be the kitchen. I was right, but I immediately wished that I hadn’t been, because due to the presence of the people in the room I was forced straight back into my role and could barely take the time to let it all sink in. For the sake of the story, I’ll describe them all here anyway.

Jeremy is probably the easiest to describe. He was standing at the gas burner and baking the pancakes. When he noticed me, he gave me a smile that was somewhere between just a man seeing his wife and someone pitying a person who was losing it. (I remembered that particular expression from the last weeks of our relationship in my own world.) Did I mention before that he had a goatee? Sometimes I’ll forget to mention details. He wasn’t bad looking at all, he was just… I don’t know. Somehow he just made me miss home.

And then there were the others. The boys at the breakfast table were unfamiliar, but it was easy to see Jeremy was their father (I’d be hard-pressed to see any Flynn traits in them whatsoever). The one on the left had blue eyes and blonde hair and a broad smile on his face. He wore a green shirt and blue pants and was currently engaged in a pancake eating race with his brown-haired brother, who appeared to be a tad younger than him. Although they were both short (well, maybe that was one gene they had in common with their maternal uncle) the one on the right seemed downright stocky and probably would always remain smaller than his brother. He wore a reddish-brown shirt with blue pants, and also had a smile on his face.

I come to the girl of the family last, but in reality she struck me first. It was Amanda, I had no doubt about it, because apart from the fact that she was about two years younger she looked exactly the same as the daughter I knew. Seriously, spitting image. She was wearing her pajamas and was clearly still tired – again something familiar, as our Mandy hasn’t been a morning person from the moment she entered Kindergarten and had to get up early every day. It was downright bizarre to see someone from home among these strangers, but I wasn’t going to mull on it and exacerbate my homesickness even more.

It didn’t take long for the kids to take notice of me. I was instantly accosted by cries of “Mom, Fred won’t let go of my pancake” and “Have you seen my backpack?” I briefly glanced at Jeremy but realized that he wasn’t going to come to my aid and was in fact watching what I would do. “All right, kids,” I said with a fake smile, “just calm down. I’m sure your problems are very important, but I’ve just had a rough night, so if you could please keep your cool for a few moments and let me sit down and relax I’d really appreciate it.”

The blonde boy nodded. “Sorry, Mom.”

Jeremy sat down next to me and put down a plate filled with pancakes. I briefly worried whether it would be safe to eat them or whether my body would reject them (since they weren’t from my home world, after all) before dismissing those concerns as ridiculous and digging in. They tasted good. I couldn’t quite remember what Jeremy’s cooking was like since it had been so long since I’d even spoken to him, but these pancakes were really good.

“Are you okay now, Candace?” he said, just loud enough that I knew he wasn’t making an effort to keep the children from hearing it – not that there’d be much point to it, what with them being so close to us – but soft enough to make his concern clear. I glanced up at him and deliberately chewed on my pancake slice as long as I could.

“I guess so” I finally replied. “I’m fine, Jeremy, I just need some time to recover from… you know, what happened tonight. And I need my brother’s help.”

“Are you going to visit Uncle Phineas?” Amanda asked suddenly. “Can you ask Vicky if we could have a sleepover some times? I’ve been meaning to call her, but I always remember it at the wrong times.”

I frowned, wondering who Vicky was but deciding that it probably wasn’t important. “Couldn’t you just text her something?”

Amanda frowned. “I would, if not for my cell phone being busted and you being too stingy to pay for a new one, meaning I have to earn the money for it myself.”

I caught another suspicious glance from Jeremy, so rather than turning back to him I decided to focus on my conversation with my counterpart’s daughter. “Well, it _is_ important for you to be able to work for and earn the things you want in life” I said, with what I thought was just the right combination of stern-parent and caring-mother.

The teenage girl shook her head. “It’s just not fair” she grumbled. “Xavier and Fred don’t have to work for anything and they get everything handed to them, but I have to struggle for every little thing I want!”

The blonde boy turned to his sister with a confused expression on his face. “What do you mean, we get everything handed to us?”

Amanda sighed. “You know what I mean. You’re bright enough to skip a class or two if you want to and in terms of pure knowledge you’re probably close to Uncle Phineas and Uncle Ferb, but you just don’t do anything with it. You’re content to just coast along. Why don’t you ever do something with your life, the way they do? You never do _anything_!”

Jeremy gave his daughter a look. “Not this again, Amanda.”

“I know, I know” Amanda muttered. “I just thought this was something that needed to be said.”

“The past fifty times you’ve mentioned it this year alone made that clear enough, honey.”

Amanda only muttered something under her breath in response to that, which allowed me the opportunity to reflect on the conversation and indeed on the whole family I was interacting with. It was… interesting. Clearly there were some tensions running underneath the surface between the various members of this family, with Amanda probably being insecure about herself and jealous of her brothers. (Well, I could definitely relate to that, or at least I used to.) Xavier and Fred seemed to be bland, content boys, but that assessment could change as I got to know them better. And Jeremy… well, he appeared to be a good enough father. This wasn’t the happiest family in the world, but as much as I hated to admit it, it was far from dysfunctional. They were managing well enough.

I made it through breakfast without further slip-ups, and after that there wasn’t really any chance for anyone to notice I wasn’t the Candace they knew in the hectic preparation for the school day. After all three children had gotten underway (apparently there was still a school bus to pick them up, which was fortunate as I wouldn’t have dared to drive them and gotten to the wrong place) that just left Jeremy and me in the house. Since he had to leave for work soon and I still had to ‘pack my bags’ as I claimed, we shared a hug and a brief kiss and off he went.

The kiss was something I hadn’t dared to deny him since as far as he knew, I was his wife and we were in a normal relationship (or at least we’re trying to) so me suddenly evading a kiss would be too suspicious. That said, it was a sensation I hadn’t looked forwards to and which I actually didn’t enjoy all that much. Sure, it was a nice kiss, and he was a good kisser, and if I closed my eyes and reminisced I could just about remember the way he kissed me back then… but there was nothing much to it. Just a simple, quick kiss as sign of a relationship between two people who still loved each other but didn’t express that love all that often anymore. Apparently, my counterpart’s life had become a little blander over time, and so had my relationship with Jeremy. It was all so normal. Nothing like the passion I remembered from days gone by.

After Jeremy had left the house, my first mission was to find Phineas’ phone number and the phone itself. Although finding the phone itself wasn’t hard – I spotted it on a cabinet in the living room quickly enough – finding my brother’s phone number was just a little bit harder. The phone wasn’t a video phone, and it had actual buttons which I could press and which showed the numbers on a frustratingly small screen. It also didn’t have audio recognition, which meant I had to search manually for my brother’s phone number instead of just being able to speak his name. I searched through recent calls first, but since those were all numbers I didn’t recognize I instead went to ‘contacts’, where it still took me almost a minute before finally ‘Phineas’ popped up.

I nervously dialed the number and gazed at the phone for a few moments to distract myself. To my eyes, it felt enormously obsolete, not quite like the big bulky phones of my youth but even despite that old-fashioned. No video contact, no hologram… I couldn’t help but wonder how this and the different relationship I had with my brother in this universe could be related to one another.

In the time I waited for the connection to be made, my nervousness rose – fortunately, that time was very short. After just a few seconds, the phone was answered at the other end. “Hello? This is Isabella Flynn.”

The voice had been familiar and recognized from the instant I’d heard it, but even so I had no time to connect the dots until the confirmation came and left me paralyzed. Isabella _Flynn_?

So did that mean, that in this world… Isabella was…

…Phineas’ **_wife_**?                                                         

Thankfully, any mental rambling I could have about that was cut off by Isabella’s voice speaking up again. “Um, hello?”

She sounded so similar to the Isabella Fletcher I knew that I simply couldn’t grasp the concept of her being with my other brother in this world. Maybe that was the best solution, though. Simply acknowledge it, not try to grasp it.

“Hi” I replied. “It’s Candace.” She would probably know that from the voice alone, but in this strange world I wasn’t taking any chances. “Is Phineas home?”

“Oh, hi Candace” Isabella said. Although there was no sign of it in her words, I detected a certain measure of surprise in her voice. “Yeah, Phineas is home. He’s taking a shower at the moment and he’s agreed to bring our daughter to school next, but he’s here. He just came back from Switzerland last night, as a matter of fact.”

Again blow after blow that would have left me reeling if not for my determination to get through it. I gritted my teeth and nodded thoughtfully. “Do you mind if I come over? I have… something I need to talk to him about.”

There was a pause at the other end. “Well, like I said, we’re kind of busy at the moment” Isabella replied. I had the feeling she wanted to add something to that, but decided not to.

“If this is about him dropping off… your daughter… we could drop her off together” I offered. Ignore the weirdness, focus on your mission… “I could swing by your house and he and I could drive to school together. It would give us a chance to catch up, too.”

“Good point” Isabella replied. “He’s been wanting to talk to you, you know. Especially after you didn’t show up at his last birthday.”

I suddenly didn’t know whether I could like this counterpart of mine anymore.

“I’m sorry” I replied, even if part of my mind rejected the thought of apologizing about Phineas to _Isabella_. “I… I can’t remember exactly what was up at the time, but I must have been very busy with work.”

Isabella sighed. “Yeah, I know all about that these days.” It was clear that she wasn’t really talking about me anymore. “Well, I’ll tell him you’re coming over. Can you be here at twenty past nine?”

I checked the clock – it was just short of nine o’clock. “I think so” I lied, wondering how I was going to do that without knowing where Phineas lived. At least Isabella seemed to presume it was well within my capacity to get there in time, and she knew I was calling from my home, so they had to live within Danville. My counterpart had to have written down Phineas’ address somewhere, so I just had to find it. For now, I really had to cut off this conversation before I said something I’d regret. “I’ll be there shortly. See you then, Isabella.”

“See you then” Isabella agreed. A moment later, the conversation was terminated.

I felt like slumping down to the ground on the spot.

Phineas… and Isabella.

Maybe it had been an absurd assumption that Phineas would be single in this world simply because he wasn’t with me, but in my defense, I was really the only person he’d ever expressed an interest in. Like, in his entire life. If there had been another girl he’d liked I hadn’t known about it, and given my admittedly jealous nature I would certainly have found out about a thing like that. But even so, different worlds create different circumstances. I just had to face the fact that in the grand scheme of the multiverse, I wasn’t Phineas’ unambiguous soul mate.

That was… manageable. A blow to my ego, but probably still manageable.

But to find out that he had ended up with Isabella? Even in the days before my brother and I had started developing feelings for each other, I’d had a low opinion of Isabella’s crush. I’d taken the possibility into account that they would end up together, just because everyone seemed to think that, but the way Isabella could drone on and on about it had really bugged me from time to time. And later, of course, I learned firsthand that Phineas had never considered Isabella in that way and wasn’t at all tempted to do so. I’d come to view Isabella’s longstanding obsession as something embarrassing to tease her about, but not as something that was ever more than a childhood crush. She got over it, got married to Ferb and ended up being very happy with him. The possibility that something could have _come_ from that crush was, in my mind, remote.

Apparently, though, I had underestimated either Isabella’s determination or Phineas’ flexibility. They were together, and they had a daughter. Children! It was one thing to know a version of me had had kids with Jeremy Johnson – after all, I’d dated him for years and envisioned a future of us being together. (That just made me realize how awkward the situation must have been for my counterpart back in my own dimension, if my theory about us swapping places was right.) But Phineas and Isabella? The thought of seeing a child – a girl, perhaps the Vicky Amanda had mentioned earlier – who might look like Phineas but whom I hadn’t given birth to was enough to make me want to stay here.

But I couldn’t back out now. It would be wimpy and irresponsible and get me no closer to returning home. (Of course I could just wait until my Phineas had fixed the situation, but the thought of sitting around and doing nothing rubbed me the wrong way.) And for crying out loud, I couldn’t help but admit that I was curious. What had caused Phineas to end up with Isabella? What was this child like? What was their marriage like? And, less confronting but no less puzzling, what was up with the subtle undertones I’d detected in Isabella’s voice as she spoke? I had gotten the impression that A – she thought I didn’t call often enough, and B – she was somehow annoyed by Phineas’ trip to Switzerland. My first assumption had been that it was a natural business trip and therefore it would be strange for Wife!Isabella to be concerned about that, but now it occurred to me that I knew next to nothing of my brother’s life in this dimension. Maybe he didn’t have Flynn-Fletcher Incorporated? Was he even an inventor, or interested in inventing? Was he still a redhead, and was his head still a triangle?

But I digress. I spent far too much time standing there worrying about what could be possible until I finally resolved what I should do to find out what was actually true because I was being ridiculous and overdramatic and really Candace, get your act together. I set to work on pulling open drawers near the phone, hoping my counterpart was old-fashioned enough to keep a list of names and addresses around there somewhere as well. Fortunately, she did. I ignored all the other names on it – I’d find out what was up with the rest of my family sooner or later – and zoomed in on one in particular, for some reason written in what I thought was probably Jeremy’s handwriting (it wasn’t mine, in any case).

_Phineas and Isabella, 147 Acorn Road, Danv._

147 Acorn Road. I wasn’t sure whether the road map of my home town had changed in this dimension, but if it hadn’t I had a pretty good guess of where to find my brother. Taking a deep breath, I opened the front door and, after checking to make sure I had the key on me, stepped out to bravely face the outside world.


	5. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AYA Candace is settling in and adjusting to what she needs to do to get back home. 
> 
> Barely.

**_ Chapter Four _ **

Wednesday, June 30th 2037  
08:00 AM    
Danville  
FLS-Verse

I have to admit that at some points, I definitely considered the thought that this night could last forever.

Even if my initial fear was gone, the sense of discomfort persisted. I tried to relax and forget, but it wasn’t enough to keep me asleep for longer than a few short spells. Phineas wasn’t exactly helping either. Occasionally I’d glance aside to see him turned towards me and staring at me with a bizarre expression on his face before hurriedly turning away the moment he saw I’d noticed him. I had no idea what he was trying to do but I could only presume the worst.

Finally, the morning rolled around. Thankfully, all the pillows had stayed in place all the time – I’d been terrified they would somehow have shifted aside overnight, as if this were a plot straight out a trashy romance novel. My brother looked up at me and blinked, probably disoriented. “Good morning, Candace.”

He wasn’t very ecstatic, and I had no intention of being so either. “Morning” I mumbled. I was going to get through this one way or another, but that didn’t mean I had to like it.

Phineas sat up on his side of the bed, probably feeling the awkwardness in the air almost as much as I was. “I’m going to head downstairs to prepare breakfast for the kids – my kids” he corrected himself. “You can join us right away, or you could have a shower first if you want to. Candace’s clothes are in the cabinet right over there.” He pointed to a big cabinet on the foot end of the bed. “I’ll take you to the lab as soon as Xavier and Amanda are off to school.”

Xavier and Amanda. The names were so familiar that I couldn’t help but be shocked that Phineas was describing them so casually as belonging to his kids. I mean logically, it made sense of course. I’d wanted to name any kids I had Xavier and Amanda from when I was just eight years old. Of course, I’d always intended to have them with Jeremy, but it made sense that I’d still like the names even if our relationship had crashed, and that easy-going Phineas would go along with it. In its own separate continuum, it made perfect sense that Phineas’ kids were named Xavier and Amanda.

Oh, who was I kidding. None of this made any sense at all.

I had just about enough alertness to nod as Phineas left the room. As soon as I was alone, I took a deep breath. For the first time since I’d woken up in this dimension, I could really think about what I was going to do. As I’d already been forced to acknowledge last night, I needed Phineas’ help in order to get home. The fact that he’d talked about a lab sounded a bit discomforting, as if he had already prepared everything and was eager to use me as a guinea pig, but I was just going to have to trust that he’d be able to swap us back. I had no other options either. But apparently, breakfast came first, which meant that I was going to have to bear this for an hour or so. And a shower _did_ sound appealing.

I got up and opened the cabinet doors. The piles of clothes were stacked up, Phineas’ largely on the left and my counterpart’s on the right. The style of clothing wasn’t even too different from my own taste to my surprise, even if it was a little less formal than I was used to. I didn’t think I’d get fired for showing up to work in clothes like this, but I _would_ probably receive some strange looks. However, since beggars can’t be choosers, I picked a few nice garments and measured myself in the mirror. It’d do.

Walking over to the bedroom door, I took a deep breath. This was going to be difficult, but I just had to get through it. I was about to open the door when it was opened from the other side.

Almost running straight into me was a boy who had to be about the same age as Xavier and Fred. However, that was about where the similarities ended. This kid wore green pants, a blue striped shirt and had orange-ish hair which reminded me of my own. Besides that and the less self-confident expression in his eyes, though, he was the spitting image of Phineas as a kid. This was, without a doubt, Phineas’ son. Which meant that, from what my brother had told me,  he also had to be _my_ son.

I felt a cold shiver run over my back. There was a big difference between being told my counterpart was in an incestuous relationship with her brother and actually seeing the results. The kid – Xavier, I logically deduced, even if he didn’t look anything like the Xavier I knew – didn’t look deformed. Well, there was a glassy stare in his eyes at the moment, but that probably had more to do with me than with him.

“Mom?” he asked, and I actually had a suppress a shriek at that which made no sense because I’d known this was coming. “Are you okay?”

“I-I’m fine” I stammered, knowing it didn’t sound at all convincing. “What’s wrong?”

Xavier looked suspicious, but decided to let the matter go. “I can’t find my calculator. I knew I was doing some sums up here the other day, but if it’s not here…” He grimaced. “It’s probably in Dad’s room, isn’t it?”

I looked around. “Well,” I answered truthfully, “I haven’t seen it.”

Xavier sighed. “Yeah, I was afraid of that. Dad’s room it is. Thanks anyway, Mom.”

He left the room, and I breathed a sigh of relief. At least that had gone well. I double-checked whether I had everything and then quickly slipped across the hallway. Although it was an entirely different house from ours, the bathroom was still right across from the master bedroom. I was momentarily stumped by the fact that there was no doorknob, but I soon recognized the strange rectangular pad as a thumb pad and slipped inside.

It was only as I got undressed and let the water run that I realized how much I really wanted a shower. The warmth provided some comfort that went at least some way to make up for the absence of my husband and kids. Not to mention that here, without Phineas, I could start pretending that everything was normal or at least under control. Even if keeping up that pretense logically wouldn’t do me any good, I felt like I needed it to stay sane.

I’d only just finished lathering my skin with soap when I heard a knock on the door. I almost jumped and stopped only because I realized that was not a good idea on a floor as slippery as this one.

“Candace?” Phineas asked. “Are you there?”

For a moment, I was terrified. What with the thumb-lock which he undoubtedly had access to, there was nothing I could do to stop him from coming in – well, I did briefly look around for something I could blockade the door with, but there just wasn’t enough lying around. “Please don’t come in” I begged, my voice higher pitched than usual (not that I cared right now).

I could hear the sigh at the other end. “It’s okay, Candace” Phineas said calmly. “I’ll stay right here. I just wanted you to look in the mirror and tell me whether there’s anything about your body which you don’t recognize. That should be able to help us determine whether it was your body or your mind which swapped dimensions.”

Oh. That… that made a certain amount of sense. I looked into the mirror and made sure to check all parts of my body. “I think there’s a bruise on my knee which I don’t recognize” I said. “Oh, and there’s a scar at the lower end of my belly which I’ve never seen before. It looks old.”

“Of course, the Caesarian section-scar” Phineas murmured. “It’s only natural that you wouldn’t have that.” Louder, he added: “I guess that makes it clear that you only swapped minds, not bodies. Well, I’ll just leave you to your showering. How would you like some pancakes for breakfast?”

My treacherous stomach rumbled before I could think of an answer. “Um, that sounds okay” I replied.

“Good to hear” Phineas said cheerfully. “See you soon, sis.” I could hear his footsteps getting more distant again.

As I tried to regain my composure, a thought suddenly occurred to me. If I was in other Candace’s _body_ , complete with a scar from the birth of one of my counterpart’s kids, then this body must have…

Nope. No, no. I was not going to go down that route. Instead, I suddenly became very interested in the text on the showering gel. It was a different brand from the one I used at home, and it had a translation of ingredients and instructions on how to use it in five different and exotic languages. It was all very… interesting.

It took me perhaps about twenty minutes to finish my shower, torn as I was between the rivaling instincts of wanting to get this over with fast and to delay meeting with my ‘family’ for as long as possible. Finally, I was ready and headed down the stairs. The house’s layout was fairly straightforward and not dissimilar to my own, so before I knew it I was in the kitchen. It was there that my attempts to maintain my stature were first shaken again, and ironically not by anything that was different. What really caught my eye was Amanda.

There was nothing particularly unexpected about seeing Phineas preparing pancakes, or this universe’s Xavier waiting anxiously at the breakfast table. His sister next to him was a different story, though. The girl looked almost exactly like the Amanda I knew. Maybe she had a slightly different fashion choice and was a year or two older, but that was about as far as it went. It surprised me to see something so similar in a world that could at its gentlest be described as ‘bizarre’, and then there was the fact (which barely registered at the back of my mind) that this girl was actually _older_ than the Amanda I knew, while I was well aware that Jeremy and I had had our first kid at a relatively young age.

Both kids looked up at my arrival, and from the way they kept staring as I sat down it was clear that it wasn’t just because they wanted to ask their mother something. Logically speaking, Phineas had to have told them about me – but did that include the fact that he and I were siblings? Or did they already know that? I didn’t know what to say to avoid dropping a bomb on these unsuspecting and frankly innocent kids, so I simply sat down in silence and waited for the pancakes.

With the way the kids were staring at me and I had determined that I wasn’t going to risk slipping up, the table might have been quiet if not for Phineas. He hummed a tune as he finished the last pancakes and started loading a few of them onto my plate, pointing out the condiments as he did so. “It’s a Flynn family recipe” he explained. “I don’t know if you have the same recipe in your world, but my Candace has always liked the way I make them. In fact, she claims it’s one of the few things I can cook without ‘cheating’, as she puts it, by using new and innovative ways of technology.”

I looked down at my pancakes and back at my brother, who was wearing glasses for some reason – although I didn’t know whether that meant his eyesight had gone bad sooner than his counterpart’s had, or whether the Phineas I knew wore lenses. “Do the kids know about…” I began in a hushed voice.

It would not have surprised me had Phineas presumed that I was referring to whether they knew about the recipe, but for once he seemed to get what I was saying right away. “I told them just before you got down here” he replied. “I figured that it was only fair to tell them the woman they were going to have to live with for the coming period was not their mother.” I barely noticed the way he had avoided mentioning a specific time limit.

“And they… you just accepted that?” I asked. “I mean, it’s not exactly a normal story…”

Xavier and Amanda exchanged glances. “We’re used to weirdness around here, to put it mildly” Amanda said. “You and Dad – well, the other you, I guess – told us you were in a relationship a few years ago, and although that was shocking enough we got used to it eventually.”

Her tone was dry, but I could see that she wasn’t entirely cool with the situation. That said, she was still taking the whole idea that her mother had been replaced by a stranger particularly well. I don’t think the Xavier, Amanda and Fred that I knew would have done that so easily.

I would have been content to just sit there, munch on my pancakes and let the whole situation sink in a bit more, but Xavier spoke up. “So… what exactly is different in your world compared to this one?” he asked. “Aside from the fact that you’re with Mr. Johnson rather than with Dad.”

I blinked. “Well… I’m still not sure, honestly. There are so many things different that I wouldn’t know where to start.” I was trying to be polite to the kid who couldn’t help who his parents were, but I noticed I still couldn’t bring myself to look him in the eyes. “Like you said, I’m married to Jeremy Johnson, while your father is married to someone who has been a friend of his from childhood onwards, Isabella Garcia-Shapiro.”

Amanda frowned. “Wait, Dad is married to Aunt Isabella in your world? So what happened to Uncle Ferb?”

Although the connection was only just short of being explicit, the strangeness of it all meant it actually took me a few moments to connect the dots. “Wait, are you telling me Isabella is married to _Ferb_ in this world? That’s – that’s crazy!”

“If you’d asked them about twenty-five years ago, before that messy autumn between us happened, they’d probably have agreed” Phineas said, sitting down at the table. There were two seats left over, one on my side and one on the kids’, and although it made me feel like they were ganging up on me I was really glad he wasn’t sitting down next to me. “All these differences are really fascinating, though. We should probably all sit down and hash them out sooner rather than later and see if we can pinpoint the moment where our worlds started to diverge.”

I shuddered. Although I had to admit that I was kind of curious to when and how everything had gone wrong here, the thought that I could uncover even more family secrets that would leave me lying awake at night was enough to steer me away from that course. No, what I wanted – and needed – was to be able to get home as soon as possible.

I didn’t say anything more after that, and apparently both Phineas and the kids were mindful enough of the state I was in to realize that it wasn’t wise to ask any further questions. Then there was the fact that, like I mentioned before, Phineas just kept staring at me from time to time. He didn’t appear overly aggressive or anything, he just… stared. There was a mix of wistfulness and concern in his expression. Seriously, it was beginning to creep me out.

The awkwardness lasted for much of the meal. I supposed that maybe it was a bit strange for us to be eating together for the first time ever (and hopefully the last time ever, although by now I was beginning to fear that I might not get home before the day was out – nope nope nope I did _not_ want to think about that possibility) and not talk to each other, especially as I was the counterpart of their family member and we thus had a lot we didn’t know about each other, and yet so much to talk about that we would each be interested in.

It felt like forever until all of the pancakes on the plate had actually been cleared and the kids started grabbing their stuff together to prepare for going to school. It was all so absurdly normal, as if incest and a normal family life could go together. I shook my head and decided to remain on the background, doing my best to ignore the kids as they cast a final glance at me, said goodbye to their father and left the house. With a bit of luck, I would be out of here before they’d come home again.

But given my track record regarding luck, my hopes weren’t up very high.

With the kids gone that just left me and Phineas, and as I entered the hallway I could see him staring at the door. I coughed, hoping to get him out of his trance. “Weren’t we going to go to your laboratory now?”

He blinked, as if snapping out of an odd melancholy. This really wasn’t what I was used to from him, but then again I had not seen him in a while now and he was a different guy than the brother I was used to (whom I was intending to steer clear of for as long as possible after getting home because that was the only way I’d ever be able to come to terms with our family relationship again after seeing this). “We were” he said absent-mindedly. “Are you sure you’re feeling up to that yet?”

I smiled. “I’m in a different body, but that doesn’t mean I’m physically handicapped all of a sudden” I told him. “I’ll be fine. Let’s just go.”

Phineas nodded, walking past me into the living room and taking a pair of keys which were laying on the refrigerator. “I’ve got to say Candace, you’re taking this remarkably well.”

I shrugged. “You do what you have to do.”

I walked after him outside of the house and came to a halt halfway across the drive way. I’d expected the house behind me to be different – and it was, as well as a bit bigger than what I was expecting – but this house was in an entirely different neighborhood. I knew this area of Danville back home, and there it was the place eccentric or rich people lived – not a category I’d want to place myself in. (Maybe eccentric fit, but not in that way.) There was a similar house right next to it, but aside from that the area was empty. A strange roar made me look up and I could actually see a flying car of sorts overhead. I noticed Phineas had stopped at the garage door and was looking at me, so I gave him my best attempt at a smile. It didn’t come out very well.

This was going to be harder than I’d thought. 


	6. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> New chapter! FLS Candace explores the AYA world, and ends up having her first interaction with someone she's already missing... although she would have preferred to have it in different surroundings.

**_ Chapter Five _ **

Wednesday, June 30th 2037  
09:20 AM  
Danville  
AYA-Verse

Perhaps one of the eeriest things thus far was the realization how normal Danville was.

There were small differences here and there, of course, which I couldn’t all quite place but eventually chalked up to technology being just a little bit behind that of our world. That felt like it should ring a bell somewhere, but it didn’t. I was just too focused on leaning back in the driver’s seat of my counterpart’s car, basking in the familiarity (and the sunlight) and finally relaxing. I’d had enough freak-outs for one day, and I wasn’t planning on adding another.  


It wasn’t until I got closer to Phineas’ house in this dimension that it occurred to me again that I was about to come face to face with a version of my brother and Isabella that I was entirely unfamiliar with. Even that didn’t unfaze me so much now that it had had a chance to sink in, though. I just had to _not_ think about Isabella and Phineas being together like that, and I’d be fine. It’d all be over soon.  


I parked the car in front of the address on the slip of paper I’d found and took a moment to look at the house. It looked… well, normal. Far more normal than I’d expected from Phineas, but then again, this Phineas probably had no reason to install an energy shield to keep the press from seeing things they shouldn’t. The shield against the lightning could still be there, though.  


I checked my watch to find that I was just about on time. I got out of the car, decisively stalked up to the house and rang the bell. Isabella opened the door, and although I knew I had to act unsurprised I still allowed myself a check of my friend’s appearance. She looked more or less normal – a bit stressed, perhaps, and frowning more than I was used to. Then again, if this version of me was callous and distant enough not to show up at birthdays, I could understand her wariness. I supposed that it could’ve been worse – we might not have been on speaking terms at all.  


“Oh hi, Candace” she said casually. “Phineas will be right here, he just needs to make sure Vicky has her teeth brushed.”  


“That’s okay” I said, duly taking in the confirmation that Vicky was in fact my brother’s daughter. “I’ll just wait out here.” I looked around, desperately hoping to avoid over thinking this. The scenery was nice, the weather was beautiful, so if I just focused on that instead…  


“Auntie Candace!”  


A blur came rushing up to me, and before I knew what was happening a girl of about eight or nine years old was clinging onto my shoulders and I was struggling to retain my composure under the sudden weight.  


“I haven’t seen you in like, forever! How’s Uncle Jeremy? And Mandy, and Xavier and Fred?” the girl rambled on. She definitely had my brother’s energy all right. I managed to put her down and studied her closely. Although she had flaming red hair like Phineas – which was quite ironic, because that seemed to be the one thing neither of our kids had inherited from him – a lot about her reminded me of a younger Isabella. The girl – Vicky – seemed sweet enough at first glance, but there was just something about her that made me very uncomfortable.  


“Aunt Candace?” the child repeated, slightly less energetic and more serious now. “Are you okay?”  


Huh, so she was perceptive too. Couldn’t have gotten _that_ from Phineas (okay, maybe that was a little unfair – Phineas was horrible when it came to seeing romantic feelings, but he had a slightly better track record in noticing when I or any of our friends were distressed for other reasons). I smiled sheepishly at her. “I’m fine, Vicky. Just a little overwhelmed at seeing you again. Your uncle and your cousins are fine, too.”  
Vicky nodded, and she seemed ready to have bombarded me with questions were it not for the footsteps in the hall. I knew it was ridiculous, but I stiffened up regardless. Fortunately, both Isabella and her daughter also seemed to be distracted by the new arrival, so I had a brief window of opportunity in which I could be honestly surprised at seeing the local version of my brother for the first time.  


The meeting was… truth be told, it was a bit of an anticlimax. On one hand, I was expecting him to be different from how I’d always knew him because we were in such a different world, and he wasn’t different. On the other hand, exactly because he was so similar he took my breath away. This was Phineas. My brother. I loved him, even despite knowing intellectually that he wasn’t the guy I’d fallen in love with – but when had knowing something intellectually ever stopped me?  


Phineas halted on the front porch, also halting at seeing me but probably for other reasons. “Hey, Candace” he said softly, and I could sense in his voice that he was surprised that I had come over. I instantly noticed the way he looked at me without that loving affection I’d gotten used to, and it pressed home even further the unpleasant thought that this might just be one dimension in which we _weren’t_ meant to be together after all.  


There were a lot of things that he was and wasn’t, but most of all he was similar enough to provide a memory of home and the way he’d always comfort and console me no matter what happened. I could barely stop myself from running into his arms like I had so many times before, and the only way I managed to keep myself under control was by remembering that I might not be greeted by a warm, supporting hug – instead, I’d be met by a guy who would wonder in confusion why his sister was bashing her head against his chest.  


“H-hi” I stammered, taking a deep breath to regain my composure.  


“So, Izzy told me you needed my help?” he asked, a mite discomforted (well, he was hardly the only one there) as his eyes flickered over to his wife for what was probably some support. He was trying to hide his feelings, but I knew every last one of his tells well enough to realize the real thought on his mind was that if this was important enough to drag me out of my ‘exile’, it had to be big.  


I nodded. “That’s right. I’ll give you the details once we’ve dropped Vicky off.”  


Phineas blinked. It felt like we were trapped in a staring contest that would never end. “Okay,” he said softly, “suit yourself.”  


Isabella cleared her throat. “This… this isn’t going to take long, is it?”  


My brother’s counterpart shrugged. “I don’t know. Candace?” 

I smiled sheepishly. “Well, I wouldn’t want to take up too much of Phineas’ time,” that was a lie, I’d sign for every minute I could take him away from this bizarre relationship he had somehow ended up in, “but this is probably going to be difficult.” 

Isabella tried hard to suppress a sigh – and failed miserably. “Phineas, you promised me the three of us would still have time to go out for a coffee – and a glass of chocolate milk, of course – before you left today, didn’t you?”  


Phineas nodded pensively. “I know I promised that, but I do have to be at the airport by 4, and I have no idea how long Candace’s problem is going to take to resolve so it would be a tight fit in any case… why don’t we go out for dinner sometime after I get back?”  


Isabella groaned. “It’s always some other time with you, isn’t it? The reason I want this so badly now is because you’re always busy! Not to mention that you keep cancelling appointments at the last moment! We’re your family, and you’ve got to be there for us!”  


“Well, Candace is my family too, isn’t she?” Phineas argued.  


Isabella huffily folded her arms. “That’s nowhere near the same thing and you know it. Vicky is your daughter. Your only child.”  


For a moment, Phineas looked remorseful at that, but he soon recovered. “I’d always be there for Vicky when she needs me, you know that Isabella. You’re the one complaining, not her.”  


“Well, I _am_ your wife!” Isabella said indignantly. “Don’t I have the right to be your primary interest?”  


“Yes, but not my _only_ interest!”  


I wasn’t sure what I was more uneasy with – the fact that Phineas and Isabella were having such a public argument, or that their daughter remained calm under it as if it was normal. Maybe to her, it was.  


Phineas sighed. “It’s almost time, Isabella. I’ve got to leave now.”  


Isabella nodded, looking as downcast as her husb – as Phineas. “You’re right.” She walked over to her daughter and hugged her. “Have a nice day at school, Vicky.”  


“Thanks, Mom” the girl responded, following her father as he walked past her mother, gave her a kiss on the cheek (I know it was beginning to get really immature but I still felt my stomach turn even at that reminder of the strangeness around here) and walked over to the car. I reluctantly closed the ranks and sat in the passenger’s seat.  


The drive to the school, which I’d anticipated as being a thoroughly uncomfortable one sitting next to the brother who I was in love with and yet wasn’t, was turned into an unexpected opportunity to get to know this world by the chatterbox in the back. Vicky, I soon discovered, was the kind of person who loved to talk about everything. And she did.  


Within a few minutes, I’d realized that my brother’s daughter was a bright and cheerful girl (no confusion on who she got those traits from) who was in third grade (making her about eight years old) and who talked a lot about her friends at school and all the things she had experienced there. And because Other-Candace had apparently been neglecting her auntly duties, I got to hear about a _lot_ of those incidents. Had she told me about the sports day they had yet? Or about the field trip? Or the teacher’s birthday when Jake from fourth grade had managed to startle himself enough to fall in the pool when he accidentally popped a balloon? Well, she soon discovered she hadn’t told _me_ any of that before, and she had no problem recounting the stories in loving detail.  


Phineas remained markedly quiet for much of the ride. I sent a glance his way every now and then but he had his attention on the road, driving faster and somehow more focused than I was used to – which was strange, because he didn’t even have his glasses on (not that they worked, but he still cut a different figure without them). I supposed his eyes must never have gone bad in the same way here, or they had and Isabella hadn’t grown fond of the dorky professor glasses the way I had. It was only when the subject got to the book series Vicky had gotten into because her Uncle Ferb had gotten her one as a present and she then complained about not having visited them before (a rather amusing similarity to Amanda there – apparently, Phinny’s kids wanting to get out of Danville was a constant in both universes) that Phineas turned to her and spoke up.  


“You know Uncle Ferb and Aunt Vanessa live in a top security area which people can’t easily get clearance to” he said gently. “We went there once when you were younger, but I guess you wouldn’t remember…”  
Vicky muttered something but was otherwise quiet, allowing Phineas to turn to the road and me to mull this newest revelation over. After about six hours in this dimension, this particular twist… honestly wasn’t that surprising. Ferb had had a crush on Vanessa for years, so if he wasn’t with Isabella here that made him ending up with Vanessa much more likely. (Of course, Isabella had also had a crush on Phineas for years, but that was… that was an entirely different situation, okay?)  


We got to the school without further delays and dropped Vicky off at the exit for the younger kids, a place I hadn’t been to in a while because our kids were older. It’s strange how there are all these bizarre little things alongside the huge differences between universes.  


As we got to the entrance Vicky cast a few quick glances sideways and then flashed a genuine smile at her father and hugged him. Phineas hugged her back. “Goodbye, sweetie. I’ll try to be back again soon, okay?”  


Vicky gave him a surprisingly wry grin. “You bet you will.”  


Phineas chuckled. “Okay.” He watched after his daughter as she ran off. I caught a glimpse of his facial expression, and it shot a pang through my heart. He just looked so happy. A broad grin, that contented and relaxed look in his eyes – this was a man who was able to display fatherly love for his daughter whenever he wanted to, and he enjoyed it. My Phineas could never do that to Amanda, not to the same extent at least, and although he never complained I knew he didn’t like it. And it was my fault. I had to be his sister rather than somebody else – and although of course getting together and having kids was his responsibility as much as it was mine, I still felt guilty because I never quite had to bear the consequences the same way he did. I got to be a parent to our kids fulltime – Phineas didn’t.  


We walked away from the school and back to the car. Phineas was quiet throughout, but I could tell from years of experience at reading him that he was waiting for me to speak up. It wasn’t until we almost got to there that I did so, though. “Let’s go to Danville Park.”  


Phineas raised an eyebrow but made no protest. “Okay.”  


We left the car behind and walked into the park. I took a few moments to look around and marvel at how much had stayed the same and at those details standing out, like a sausage stand which should be near a path junction but was gone here. After a few comparisons I made like that, I decided that I was falling into repetition and worse, that I was just using them as an excuse to postpone the inevitable. I cleared my throat.  


“Phineas?” I asked. He turned towards me and the words almost dried up in my throat. “I… have something to tell you.”  


“Go ahead.” Besides a touch of curiosity, I could detect no emotion in my brother’s eyes or his voice.  


“It – it’s not a simple story” I continued. “I’m going to have to ask you to keep an open mind. Like, way open. Incredibly open.”  


Phineas frowned. “Is something wrong, Candace? Did something happen between you and Jeremy?”  


I chuckled, wishing it were that simple. “Phineas…” What the heck. “I’m not the Candace you know. I’m from another dimension.”  


He looked back at me, and blinked. “Oh.”  


Well. That was not what I’d expected. Knowing Phineas, I would have thought an expression of youthful enthusiasm and curiosity would have been more likely. But of course, I reminded myself, I didn’t know this Phineas. At least he hadn’t rejected the idea outright and told me I was crazy. ‘Oh’ was… fine. I could work with ‘Oh’.  


“I woke up this morning in the bed of my counterpart of this dimension” I proceeded. “I felt that there was something going on right away, but it wasn’t until I woke up Jeremy that I realized something was off – because he’s not my husband in my world. I tried to talk to him about what happened, and eventually I decided to track you down because I knew I needed your help to get home – or Ferb’s, of course. I think the mind transmitter my P – my world’s Phineas had me test yesterday resulted in me swapping places with the me of this world. It was only supposed to make me able to look into the minds of versions of me from other universes, not switch places with them, but… well, apparently that was what happened.”  


I knew I was fumbling the sentence at the end – and to be honest, I’d been fumbling for a lot longer than that – but I don’t think I could have done anything else because Phineas just kept staring absent-mindedly into the distance and didn’t react to anything I’d said. When he noticed I was looking at him, he gave me a faint smile. “Wow.”  


Seriously, ‘oh’ had been bad enough – I would not accept ‘wow’. “Is that all you have to say?” I asked, annoyed and truth be told a little surprised.  


Phineas smiled again, this time slightly more genuine. “Sorry, Candace – Other Dimension Candace, I guess. It just needs to sink in – you have to admit this is a pretty big deal.” He whistled. “Another dimension, huh? What are things like there? What about me and Isabella?”  


His optimistic curiosity was so familiar that it hurt, even if the question itself was a little awkward. Best to bite the bullet right away, I supposed. “That’s kind of the biggest difference between our worlds I found thus far, and probably the key one” I said. “You’re not married to Isabella in our world.”  


There was a fluttering of emotions across his face that went so fast that I couldn’t describe them all. “I’m not?” he said in a small voice. This was rapidly turning out to be much more awkward than I’d hoped.  


“No. You see… in our world, you and I… we…” Cut to the chase, Candace. Just bite the bullet and get on with it. “…basically, you and I are practically married instead.”  


This time, I could see the emotion on his face, and it was good old halfhearted, confused-amused disbelief. “You’re not… serious, are you?”  


I cast my head down, suddenly unwilling to look into his eyes. I could face disgusted and rejecting looks from anybody else, but not from Phineas. Never from Phineas. “I’m afraid so” I said softly.  


“But… but we’re siblings!” my brother stammered. “We couldn’t have gotten married, that’d be incest! Not to mention that I’m reasonably sure I never liked you in _that_ way!”  


Ouch. It’s not like I was expecting anything else, but – still. That stung. I looked up at him and tried to smile comfortingly. “I know it’s nuts, but well, you know, sometimes in life things don’t happen as you’d planned. Sometimes, they take a different turn. That’s what happened in my world.”  


“But I…” Phineas whispered. “But Isabella and I… and you and Jeremy, we’re… you’re supposed to be… I need to sit down.” He did so, continuing to stare up at me. “I can’t believe that you and I would ever… that we would ever… do that.”  


I was trying very hard to suppress the annoyance that was replacing the earlier hurt, mostly because I really didn’t feel up to having this discussion right now. I just wanted to get home, was that so much to ask for? “You don’t have to act so dramatic about this, Phineas.”  


There was an odd look in my brother’s eyes as he blinked at me. “I don’t want to annoy you, but I do think I’m allowed to make a big deal out of another version of me deciding to marry his sister.”  


Phineas using sarcasm – subtle sarcasm, at that. Now there was a new one. I sighed. “Look, it’s not that I wasn’t expecting this kind of reaction. I would absolutely expect my own counterpart to flip.” Something which my Phineas has to deal with now, I thought uneasily. “Isabella… well, she would almost certainly go nuts. I could even see Ferb raising an eyebrow. But you? Phineas, you’ve always looked at impossible and absurd things and embraced them rather than running away from it. I’m not saying that you should do that here, but you have to admit that freaking out about this is not really in your character.”  


My brother remained quiet for a moment. “Maybe you’re right” he finally said, his voice firmer than before. “I probably shouldn’t make so much of a fuss about it, considering you’re from another universe and all, but it just feels so weird to me.”  


I nodded and grimaced, feeling convinced that there could only be one person responsible for that. It didn’t make much sense for Isabella to teach Phineas to dislike incest if there had been no ‘threat’ of it in this world, but I would never let logic get in the way of my jealousies and grudges.  


Phineas cleared his throat, apparently realizing that my thoughts had trailed off. “But… you were saying you needed my help?”  


I realized just from looking at him that he was trying to evade the whole sleeping-with-his-sister thing. “Yeah. I mean, I’m fairly confident my Phineas will get me back but that could take forever, so it would probably help if we went to your lab and you could invent something from this side to speed it up a little.”  


My brother looked at me oddly. “That’s going to be difficult.”  


I blinked and stared at him, noticing that he was looking a bit embarrassed. I nodded and attempted to smile (I think it actually came out _too_ well, because I’ve grown used at smiling at Phineas because of how happy it always makes him). “Look, I understand if you’re busy, but I really need your help. If it turns out you can’t help me, that’s okay, but…” I hesitated, not wanting to say that I expected him to help me but feeling that he should anyway. I was honestly a bit disappointed with his reaction – even if we weren’t as close here as we were at home (obviously) I hadn’t expected Phineas not to want to help me.  


He shook his head. “That’s not it, Candace.”  


I frowned. “Then what’s the problem?” I replied, probably sounding a bit more snappy than I should have. “Look, just take me down to your lab and we’ll be able to figure something out. I’m sure you and Ferb will – ”  


Phineas cleared his throat, and I stopped pacing around and really gave him my attention for the first time in… a while. “That’s the crux of the problem. I don’t have a lab.”  


“What?” The news felt like a slap in the face, and within seconds my brain was churning out several different scenarios on how Phineas could possibly function without a laboratory at his disposal. “But you… how could you…”  


And then it occurred to me that maybe I should look not at the _how_ , but at the _why_. “You don’t mean…”  


Phineas nodded. “Candace, the reason I’ve been spending time away from home at all these different places, as you heard me discuss with Isabella earlier, is because I’m not a scientist. I’m a special effects maker for movies. I haven’t really invented anything in over twenty years.”  


A chill ran up my spine as I heard him say those words that should have been so alien to Phineas Flynn. Forget Jeremy, the cold relationship between my counterpart and her brother, Vicky, or even freaking **_Phinbella_**.  


_This_ is when I knew I wasn’t in Kansas anymore.


	7. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You probably expected me to upload these chapters in sets of two (AYA/FLS) like I did before, and I was planning to, I just got busy yesterday. Here's the second half, in which AYA Candace explores her alternate brother's work place, but not everything she finds is to her liking...

**_ Chapter Six _ **

  
Wednesday, June 30th 2037  
09:30 AM  
Danville  
FLS-Verse

After Phineas first started making those comments about ‘the lab’ I’ve got to admit I did not really see what he meant by that coming. What I had in mind was a normal research faculty, or perhaps even some of the various constructions my brothers had had in the backyard when we were younger.

The building we drove up to, however, dwarfed all of that. It was… huge. That was really the first thing I noticed, not because I’d never seen a skyscraper before but because it was here in Danville, where apart from a ‘Big Idea’ or two in my brothers’ youth those things didn’t belong. And yet, the ‘Phineas and Ferb’ logo on top, displaying my brothers’ faces a few years younger than they were now, made the purpose unmistakable.

Phineas smiled, pulling the car into the lot and parking it under a cover. “I take it from your reaction that Flynn-Fletcher Incorporated doesn’t exist in that way in your world.”

I shook my head, trying to regain some of my teenage mentality when weirdness had never silenced me in this way. “No” I murmured. “I don’t think you’ve even invented anything in years.”

The facial expression that _that_ yielded was actually pretty funny. “In… in years?” Phineas stammered. “What happened – did I have an accident, or…”

I shook my head, secretly enjoying the fact that there was still something that could unnerve him. “Nope. You just got interested in other things.”

Phineas was quiet for a while. “Like Isabella?” he finally whispered.

“Like Isabella.”

He looked out into space for a few more moments, but then he blinked and opened the door. “Well, that’s very interesting to hear” he said, his voice and appearance back to normal. “Are you coming, Candace?”

I got up and followed him, shaking my head in disbelief at the way he could so easily let go of everything. We walked over the parking lot and through the doors into the building. Phineas exchanged a curt but clearly familiar word with the secretary (who was giving me a death glare for some reason) and headed over to the elevator. There were twelve stops up, but we went down instead, into the basement.

Everything was neat and sterile, and I was so focused on looking at the elevator and acknowledging the fact that my brothers actually _owned_ a corporation of sorts here that it took me a few seconds before I properly reacted to the room at the bottom. But when I did…

It was the stereotypical lab of a mad scientist – that much was clear from the first glimpse I got. Machinery was everywhere. Complicated devices and rooms filled up so much space that I was sure Ferb had unleashed his ‘British sci-fi technology’ on the room again. There was too much for me to properly describe here, not to mention that I didn’t know what half of it was for at the time (I still don’t) but trust me when I say that it was huge.

And bustable.

For the first moment, I didn’t even recognize the sounds that were coming out of my mouth until I identified them as manic laughter. Phineas turned to me and gave me a concerned look. “Um… Candace? You okay?”

“I’m fine” I said, grinning. “Better than I’ve been since… well, since yesterday! This is so huge and perfect! All I need to do is get Mom and you’ll finally be busted! Well, it’ll be your Mom but it will still be Mom either way.” I turned back to the elevator, which had unfortunately just closed, and pressed the ‘up’ button so many times that I could just about short it out.

After a few moments of waiting anxiously, however, I felt Phineas’ hand on my shoulder. I snapped around and squinted at him. “What?”

“Candace…” There was that odd tone of concern in his voice again that I’d detected earlier. Wait, this wasn’t the same concern, it was a different concern, but it was concern, I was pretty sure about that. “Mom knows about this.”

That brought me up short, even though come to think of it it was obvious. Even Mom couldn’t not realize there was a skyscraper in Danville if it remained there for decades. “She does?” I stammered, the elevator forgotten. “She’s seen it?”

Phineas nodded. “She’s seen it all, and she’s even been on a tour through the building a few times. Oh, and just in case you were thinking about busting us for that instead, she knows about our relationship as well.”

I slumped back to a less anxious posture. “…drat.” So many strange things going on here, and I couldn’t even bust my brothers for it.

Not that I wanted to, of course. I was a grown woman with a sense of responsibility and self-control. I wasn’t going to try to bust my little brothers (who were adults themselves) like a jealous teenager, I just got… carried away. It was always hypothetical. I mean, I _could_ have busted the boys, if Mom hadn’t known everything already, but I wouldn’t have done so because it would have served no purpose to me and it would have been a very immature thing to do.

Obviously.

Phineas was still looking at me, but when I gave him a sharp look back he returned his attention to the lab, leading the way towards what I’ll just call the inner sanctum. There was a room with a control panel and all sorts of switches, buttons and flashy lights, and behind a huge window was a room which contained some equipment but most prominently featured a bland hospital bed without blankets. It was all standard ‘human science experiment room’ fare, really. I looked at it for a while and then turned to my brother. “So I’m guessing this is where you messed up your plans?”

The uncomfortable expression on Phineas’ face was almost a blush, a rare look on him. “Well… yeah. Candace – my Candace – was lying down and trying to focus on other dimensions, but throughout the experiment all her signals were stable. There was no sign that she was getting through and it looked like the machine just wasn’t working – well, until you woke up here that night.”

I nodded, not eager to think back to that moment. I automatically shuffled a foot or two away from my brother’s counterpart. “So, is it always just you here all by yourself in the basement?”

“And Ferb, of course” Phineas replied. “And sometimes I have some of the staff assisting me as well, but both yesterday and today had been cleared in advance for the mind transmitting experiment anyway. This lab is normally where Ferb and I conduct our private projects, while the regular output of Flynn-Fletcher Incorporated is conducted in the rest of the building. Could you lie down there? I’d like to try something.”

I tried to ignore the hundred possible connotations that sentence could have and focus on the fact that Phineas was most likely just trying to help me get home. I lay down on the bed and felt my brother connect a helmet with various wires and suction cups to my head – not exactly the most pleasant situation, but manageable. “And what about your… sister?”

If Phineas had noticed the way I paused before I said the final word, he didn’t give any sign of it (which led me to believe that he probably hadn’t. This was Phineas, after all.) “She occasionally comes over here when I need her for something or just to visit, but she’s not here that often – nor am I, for that matter. We both have our own offices elsewhere in the building.”

That stopped me short. “Wait, I am – your sister is an inventor here?” At this stage, that idea should not be crazy enough to be a surprise – and yet somehow it still was.

Phineas chuckled. “Hardly – even if she does have some talent. I’ve been telling her for years not to underestimate herself, but, well, you of all people should know how she is when it comes to accepting ideas from others.” He grinned slyly. “Candace’s work here is all legal matters – buying up new properties for the companies, patenting inventions and protecting those patents, et cetera. She’s really skilled at coming up with ways to evade – or shield off, depending on the situation – the mazes of the law.”

“I know” I said, surprised at how close and yet how different the situation was to my own. “I’m a professional lawyer myself.”

Phineas looked up. “You are? Curious. Yeah, I can see where that makes sense.”

It was good to hear that he could, because I wasn’t so sure. Part of my own interest in the legal profession was because it provided a way to vent off my frustration at not being able to bust Phineas and Ferb, and to use the talents I needed to (unsuccessfully) do that in a serious job. Or so everyone said, anyway, because apparently most people had a clear picture of my psyche, which often lead me to think that they could have told me the things that were apparently so obvious to them now a lot sooner. (I could say a lot of bad things about Dr. Baumer, but at least he is a _professional_.) But this Candace clearly had no such frustrations going on in her life, if the way Phineas had looked at me just now when I’d almost given in to my old busting urges again was any indication.

Or maybe she did. I couldn’t tell from being around this Phineas so little and I was in no mood to talk to him about it. It was probably safe to assume that Other-Candace, having married her brother, was at _least_ as messed up as I was, on any front.

Instead, as I noticed the steady beeping of what was probably my heartbeat coming from a monitor nearby, I resolved to move the subject to something else I’d been wondering. “So, the people who work here… do _they_ know about…” I gestured back and forth between Phineas and my current body awkwardly, “…you know?”

“About our relationship, you mean?” I nodded. “No, Candace has been reluctant about telling anyone about that. For all our lives, only our closest friends have known our secrets. We’ve only told Amanda and Xavier when they were already into their preteen years, and I think certainly at the time Candace would have liked to postpone that conversation even further, if possible until they were eighteen. If she was going to tell them at all. I think she held out some hope that perhaps we might be able to keep the secret well enough to never have to have a conversation about it, but in her heart of hearts she probably knew that wasn’t going to happen. I never thought we could be able to keep it a secret forever.”

“But Mom and Dad also know?” I asked him, recalling what he had mentioned earlier.

“Yes – although that is a long story” Phineas replied. “They didn’t find out until well after the kids had already been born, just a few years ago. Candace had been stressed out a lot beforehand, wondering how they would react.” He smiled softly, if such a thing were etymologically possible. “I’ve got to say that you’re a lot calmer than the Candace I know in that regard.” I gritted my teeth uncomfortably. “Your brainwaves are almost entirely stable… wait, they’re fluctuating quite a bit there… no, wait, now they’re calm again. Remarkable.”

I shrugged and tried to act casual, even if that was impossible now that Phineas would not only be able to pick up the outward signs I was giving off but also monitor my internal situation. “I try to keep myself under control. So, who else did you tell about you and your sister?” I hoped the conversation switch was smooth enough for him not to question it. It didn’t feel smooth enough to me, but I’ve got to admit that I have always been just a bit too paranoid.

Phineas flipped a few levers and then seemed to be lost in thought. “Well, let’s see… Ferb knew right away, of course, because I was talking to him about my crush on Candace long before we ever got together… Isabella found out later and she wasn’t pleased, but that’s a long story… Stacy was obviously told the truth at some point, and like I just said we eventually told Xavier and Amanda, as well as Mom and Dad and Ferb and Izzy’s kids. Oh, and Perry knows, of course.”

I sighed, not at all surprised that Phineas would include his pet in this – while I respected his devotion as a pet owner, both in our universe and in this one he really was way too attached to the old meat brick. “That’s all? What about Buford and Baljeet?”

Phineas shrugged. “We considered telling them once or twice, but it never came up and we weren’t particularly eager to involve more people in this. That’s why your counterpart never told Jenny either.”

I tried to imagine Jenny being told about me having a relationship with my brother. She might actually be one of the few people who were weird enough to have a favorable reaction to that, considering it a unique balance in the forces of the universe or some vaguely spiritual talk like that. “It must have been awkward to have to hide it from them.” Not that I felt sorry for one bit for my other self and her brother – they had picked this lunacy for themselves, so they’d just have to live with it.

My brother didn’t immediately reply because he was staring intensely at the screen, but then he nodded, simultaneously flipping off several switches and eventually releasing the grip of the helmet on my head. “At first, yes. I can remember there were a few times when I felt like just taking them aside and telling them everything when I was trying to have a good time with Candace and the other members of our gang and they showed up. Of course by now I haven’t seen them in years, so the point is moot.” He switched the subject while I was still well immersed in the current one. “Your mental chart is very similar to my Candace’s, but there are a few clear differences. I’ll need to work some more on the machinery first, but after that your job will basically be to think about your old home – and eventually, your thoughts should be able to get through and we’ll be able to make the link between dimensions along which you’ll be able to switch back.”

I sat up, absent-mindedly holding the helmet in my hands. “You haven’t talked to Buford and Baljeet in years?”

“No” Phineas replied. “We were good friends when we were kids, but we grew apart over time. Different interests, you know, and different choices in life. And like I said, the fact that we had to hide our relationship from them was an important factor as well, especially after Candace and I moved in together. Why? Is that different in your world?”

“You could say that” I replied. “You work in special effects technology in our universe, and you often work with Buford in directing movies so as far as I know you’re still close friends. And of course, Buford and Baljeet are still as joined at the hip as ever.”

“Of course.” Phineas chuckled. “I’ve got to admit that they’re the most unusual pair of frenemies I’ve ever encountered, but their friendship seems to work out well enough for them. Is Baljeet still married to Ginger in your world?”

“Yes, he is” I said, getting up from my bunk and joining my brother in the adjacent room where he was checking his calculations. “I think they’ve been happily married for at least ten years now, but I’m not sure how they’re doing because I haven’t talked to Stacy in a while.” I paused to think about how _pathetic_ that was, really. I had to talk to my old friend who lived in _Uruguay_ to find out what people who lived downtown and were some of my brothers’ closest friends were doing with their lives? That was… I don’t care what Doc Baumer says (and he’d probably agree with me), but that was _wrong_.

Just not nearly as wrong as this crazy world was, of course.

“So what about that special effects thing?” Phineas asked, being as always too much of a chatterbox to let a long silence fall between us. “That sounds cool enough, but I don’t remember ever having a particular preference for it. Do you know what made me choose that as a profession?”

I blinked. “I’m not sure, actually. I guess you figured that you had to pick something out of your zillion interests, and I think you’d received an offer from this guy… what’s his name… Addison?”

Phineas spun around and gave me his undivided attention. “Wait, you mean _Clive_ Addison? The special effects master? Oh right, of course, now I remember! That was a long time ago, though – we were just kids, and there was this huge movie and cartoon convention in Danville which featured Clive Addison whom both Ferb and I were a fan of – and then this row broke out between fans of Stunkleberry Finkbat and Space Adventure and Ferb and I had to quell it using some special effects of our own, but I seem to remember that we weren’t the only ones involved. As I recall, at some point during the convention, the fan war was stopped by a…” A knowing grin spread across his face, replacing the pensive look that had been there before. “… a person in a giant Ducky Momo costume?”

I bit my lip and did everything to avoid the blush on my cheeks. “Yeah, sure, that happened.” I couldn’t avoid a sheepish smile but forged on in the hope that my brother wouldn’t notice. “Now what were you saying earlier about when you were going to be able to help me get home?”

Phineas cast me a knowing look. (Why couldn’t he just be the same oblivious guy he was when he was a kid again, that was a good trait he used to have.) “Do you need to tell me something, Candace?”

I was seriously blushing now. “Hey, it could have been anyone in that Ducky Momo costume. What makes you suddenly think it would have been me if you’d never suspected, er, thought it before?”

“Well, I haven’t thought about it in like forever, and I was really oblivious at the time” Phineas replied. “But come to think of it, there is only one person it really could have been.”

There was an awkward silence, as I was neither ready to confirm nor deny. Then I looked up at him and said as innocently as I could: “So, about those papers you’re holding?”

Phineas rolled his eyes, but was professional enough not to tease me any further. Instead, he held up the papers he’d printed out from that brief mind scanning session and show them to me. “It looks like all we have to do is have you make contact with the other dimension and we should be able to swap you back” he told me. “I’m not exactly sure how it’ll work out, though. My Candace didn’t make contact when we wanted her to, and she made too much contact when we didn’t. It’s really strange because we should have had maximum input while she was here under the direct effects of the mind transmitter, and only at most some residue when she was back home – nothing like enough to allow you to swap minds between universes. I’ll have to talk to Ferb about this tonight and get a second opinion.”

Frankly, I could care less why we were swapped as long as I could get back and it didn’t happen again, but one word there had caught my attention. “Tonight?”

My brother’s counterpart nodded, slightly confused. “Yes. I don’t think I told you this before, but Ferb is off on a safari of sorts in the South American jungles with Isabella and the kids and we can only make stable contact with the camps they’ve set up in the early mornings and the evenings. Well, I suppose theoretically I could get a short message through this afternoon, but this would be a complicated story to tell especially if Ferb and I were to talk about the logistics involved as well to try to solve the matter together. Not to mention that my Candace told me we shouldn’t disturb them all the time with my ideas because they’re on a family holiday right now and they should have time to themselves. She’s right, of course, but it’s just odd to have Ferb not be here for several days, and now that you’re swapped…” 

“Yeah, sure,” I insisted impatiently, “I get that, but surely you can do some things without Ferb? I mean, you did build this thing, and you’ve built so many things, so if you could just take a closer look at the mechanics and I concentrate extra hard we could pull this off before tonight, right? That’s the way it’s always been!”

The glance I got didn’t give me much hope in that regard. “Candace, this isn’t just some casual problem like the ones we solved when we were kids” Phineas said softly. “You’ve swapped minds with a counterpart from another dimension, one that is far away from your home in the multiverse no less. It’s an extremely complicated problem and unlike when we were younger, I have a lot of other stuff to do on the side. I’ll try to move them as much as possible and be there for you whenever I can, of course, but you have to understand that even with Ferb’s help this will at least take two days. Probably longer.”

My previous resolve faltered. “No” I whispered hoarsely. “No, I can’t be – two _days_? Or _more_?” My own optimism was forgotten, the awkward-but-fun exchange about Ducky Momo I’d had with Phineas just a minute ago was forgotten. It was just me trapped in a horrible alternate universe where I was in a romantic relationship with my own **_brother_**. (Yes, I know I’ve stressed that several times now. In my opinion, it couldn’t be stressed enough.) “You’ve got to – I can’t – I can’t stay here that long! This – this world is insane!” I noticed the way Phineas’ face contorted at that, but I didn’t notice it enough to care for it. “You can’t tell me you can’t bring me home all by yourself – you’ve done so many things before, how could you… why can’t you…”

Phineas put a hand on my shoulder, which I instantly shook off. “I’m sorry, Candace” he gently replied. “I’ll do the best I can, I just… I don’t know what else I can do. I’ll do everything to fix this problem, I promise you that.”

At this point, I had a hard time believing his possibly empty promises. But I also had no desire to lose control of my emotions like that again (that was so wrong, and so useless, why did I have to freak out like that, ugh, I thought I was _past_ this), so I nodded dully. “Okay.”

Phineas frowned. “Are you all right, Candace?”

“I’m fine” I instantly replied. “I’m fine, I’m all right, I don’t know what came over me there. It – it’s fine. Take your time. I can… tough it out.” And as long as I kept repeating that to myself, there needn’t be a problem. If I stopped, though… well, I didn’t even want to think about that.

Phineas still looked unsure of how stable I was, but after a while he appeared willing to stop digging. “I have to sign some paperwork up at my office” he said softly. “If you want to, you could join me, or you could stay here. There should be some books around for you to read. I’ll be back here as soon as I can.”

I smiled faintly. “That’s okay.”

I didn’t tell him anything beyond that, mostly because I didn’t trust myself to do so. Phineas cast one more glance at me and then walked up to the elevator, eventually disappearing from sight. I sat down on the lab table/bed-thing after he was gone, taking the papers he’d printed and trying to decipher what was on it. As usual, I couldn’t understand any of it and soon enough I gave up on trying. For better or for worse, I relied on Phineas here. And since Phineas apparently couldn’t be relied on all the time, this would take a while. A long while.

How had it gotten to the stage where this was what had become of my life?


	8. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, it's been a very long while, but here's another chapter for you to read. The reason I took so long was because I wanted to finish the story properly first before uploading a new chapter, and I've done that now. It's nineteen chapters, all in all, and about 87.000-88.000 words. That's more than I anticipated (seriously, how do my stories always end up being that long), but fortunately it's still considerably less than FLSITTSA.

**_ Chapter Seven _ **

Wednesday, June 30th 2037  
10:00 AM    
Danville  
AYA-Verse

It took me a few moments to capture my breath after Phineas had told me he wasn’t an inventor – and honestly, it wasn’t even the fact that this meant he might not be able to help me. I let him blab on about how he’d been approached by special effects master Clive Addison as a kid and how Addison had given him a call at some stage in his adulthood and they’d hit it off right away leading to his current state, but my mind wasn’t really on what he had done here, but rather on what he hadn’t done instead.

“But why?” I interrupted as soon as I could reasonably get a word in again. “You love inventing! It’s your passion! Phineas, when we were young you couldn’t go for a single day without not building anything – in fact, if we tried to stop you from doing what you wanted to do you straight-up went into a depression!” How could that ever – change, this much?

Phineas frowned. “Candace, I didn’t always flip out at not being able to build stuff, only when I’d previously intended to do something and others got in my way. I had lazy days without doing anything even during summer, and Ferb and I didn’t get to build as much as we would have wanted to during school time either. It’s about managing your expectations, sis. You can’t always keep doing the things you enjoy in life, and I guess I managed my expectations so much that I grew out of the inventing phase. But it’s not all bad – I love my current job to bits, and…”

I shook my head. “That’s not you.”

“I beg your pardon?”

“That’s not you” I repeated. “I can’t believe I’m actually hearing Phineas fricking Flynn say that inventing was ever a phase to him. Phineas, inventing was as natural to you as breathing or eating! How could you possibly have ‘grown out’ of that? What about Ferb, has he gone nu- has he decided to stop inventing as well?”

“Ferb still – tinkers on the side” Phineas replied. “But he does a lot of things. Inventing things, directing movies, acting, practicing some of the magic they taught him at Camford on Oxbury…”

“Magic?” I spluttered. It didn’t come out very loud, however, probably due to the extent of my surprise. Although to be honest, all of this was just one big shock after another.

“…but I think he’s mostly occupied with supporting his wife these days. Vanessa does have a heavy burden to carry, you know…” He turned to me and frowned uncertainly. “…do you?”

“I haven’t got a clue” I said dryly. “But by all means, do enlighten me. What exactly does Vanessa do for a living that would require Ferb’s support all the time?” If I was going to be mad at the world here for steering my brothers – both of them – off their natural inventing paths, I might as well be informed on the exact reasons for why it happened.

Phineas looked up at me. “Well, she’s vice-president of the United States.”

… I have to admit that I was not expecting that. “Wha – vice-president? How did that happen?”

“I’m not exactly sure, but she was basically already on a path towards political ambitions when she started working at OWCA” Phineas replied. “She got into contact with some important people there, they convinced her to stand for a senatorial election, and with Ferb backing her and Vanessa’s own strong personality they soon became an unstoppable team that headed straight forwards to where they are now.”

“Wow” I muttered. “You know, of all the things that are different here, that one has got to be the coolest. I wonder what our world’s Vanessa would think about that.”

Phineas grinned. “I’m glad to hear you don’t think _everything_ here is awful. So, are you still in contact with Vanessa there?”

“Sometimes” I replied, wondering whether to explain her marriage as well before deciding that it might as well be best to have everything clear straight away. “She’s actually married to Jeremy Johnson, if you can believe that. And before you ask, no, I’m not sure how that happened. I think they bonded at college, mostly over knowing people who were involved with craziness. They’re both fairly laid-back people, so that must have helped.”

“I guess so” Phineas agreed. “Still, Jeremy and Vanessa are far from the most obvious people in the world who could become a couple.”

“Full agreement here, but those things do tend to happen sometimes” I said. “And I suppose it’s up to them to determine whether they are happy together. I haven’t actually spoken to them in a while, though – I found talking to Jeremy to be a bit awkward in the first weeks after Phineas and I started dating, and well, they don’t know about our relationship so on that account it was perhaps only natural for us to drift apart.”

Phineas nodded. “I see. Do many people know about you and my other self being… well, together?”

That stopped me short for a moment. “Well… no more than necessary, really. The people that do know all found out because of how much they interacted with us and because it would just have been too impractical to keep it a secret from them forever. We try to keep the amount of people who are in the know limited because my Phineas _is_ a famous inventor,” I swear I couldn’t help the hint of smugness and pride that slipped into my voice there, “and for obvious reasons we don’t want the press to get wind of our relationship. Thus far, that’s working well enough – heck, Mom and Dad didn’t even know until a few years ago.”

“How do you keep it all a secret then, if my other self is such a public figure?” Phineas wondered.

I shrugged. “Well, it helps that it’s not the first idea many people come up with when they see us together – incest is still quite a mental leap to make. If you read the tabloids, there are probably more people who think Phineas is secretly dating Ferb than me.” The weirded-out look on his face was as satisfying as I’d hoped it would be. “And although we live together, the outside world has no real reason to presume that I’m not a single mother who has taken her brother in. Cohabiting siblings happen all the time, after all. Makes you wonder how many of them are secretly in a relationship. Anyway, Phineas has a separate bedroom which guests can presume he sleeps in, so there’s that, and there is a whole shield covering the house and keeping it protected against paparazzi. Not to mention the fact that we hardly ever leave Danville together.”

Phineas nodded thoughtfully. “I see. And what do your kids think about that?”

I paused for a moment but forged on before (I think) he could notice it. “Xavier and Amanda both had some issues with adjusting to the fact that your counterpart was their father,” that was putting it mildly, especially in Xavier’s case, “but eventually they got used to it. Phineas is their Dad behind closed doors, and although it clearly irks them that they don’t have a public father and that we can’t do many of the things normal families could do much more freely, they wouldn’t want to trade us for another set of parents. Believe me – I’ve asked them.”

Phineas nodded. “I see. Wow. I still can’t believe that you and I – well, the other me, I suppose – are really in a relationship in another world. Does that mean he’s never felt anything for Isabella?”

“Not that I know of” I replied ambiguously, and I suddenly realized that at this point I was willing to let this local version of my brother hope that his counterpart did at one point have feelings for someone other than myself. I was fairly sure he hadn’t, even though I have to admit this whole experience was beginning to shake my confidence in that,  but I was willing to let Phineas delude himself about that for a while. Not just because I felt bad for him, but also because I didn’t want him to be upset since I still needed him…

Or did I?

If Phineas’ other self hadn’t invented anything in years, what was the point of continuing to hang around him? (Besides the fact that he reminded me of my own Phineas, of course.) He wouldn’t be able to help me. And if he couldn’t help me, I had to wait for my Phineas to come up with something. And if my local self hadn’t told him who she really was, that could take forever.

I shivered, a doom scenario suddenly occurred to me. What if the other me had flipped out upon discovering where she was and with who she was? From what little I’d heard about her thus far, she didn’t really sound like the nicest person, nor was she very close to her brother. Finding out that she was in another dimension after years of having nothing to do with her little brothers’ brand of crazy could very well drive her mad, and the prospect of having to live with Phineas for a temporary husband could drive her over the edge. In my darkest nightmares, I could envision my counterpart fleeing in terror as she heard the truth, never explaining why – perhaps seeking solace with a confused Jeremy at first, driving a wedge in his and Vanessa’s marriage, before deciding to permanently leave Danville and thus leaving my brother with no idea why the woman he loved had abandoned him so suddenly, perhaps driving himself and the kids mad with despair…

It was the most negative of all possible scenarios, of course, and it relied on my counterpart being completely irrational and uncooperative and on Phineas never realizing the mind transmitter had caused the problem, which even if the other me didn’t tell him was an unlikely assumption. But it didn’t matter. For those few moments, the image of never seeing him again was far too real, and I felt, it couldn’t, I didn’t…

No.

I wouldn’t accept it. I couldn’t accept it. I loved my home world, I loved my life, I loved my kids… and I loved _Phineas_. Never seeing him again simply wasn’t an option. And if I had to single-handedly put the inventing spirit back into his other self, then that was what I would do.

I turned to said other self, who had remained quiet while I was mulling all that over. The curious, expectant look he gave me was intimately familiar, but I knew this person wasn’t the Phineas Flynn I knew and loved and I felt that he didn’t deserve the title of being his counterpart if he was really willing to give up just like that.

“Look, Phineas,” I said somberly, “all these anecdotes we’re exchanging are very interesting, but let’s get back to the matter at hand. I understand you haven’t invented anything in years. I don’t get why, but I realize it and accept it. But that doesn’t mean that you can’t just give up. For my sake, and for your own sake. You may love being a special effects maker, you may love hanging out with Buford and Baljeet, but unless I’m thoroughly mistaken about who you are that can’t be enough for you, Phineas. You’re an inventor. You’re a scientist. You love to dream about and build so much more than just movies. Even if you haven’t done it for years, that spirit inside you can’t all be gone.”

Phineas sighed. “I’ve got to admit that I do wonder from time to time whether I should start building stuff again” he replied. “But what with my job and my family I just haven’t had the opportunity – and like I said, I don’t have a laboratory with anything sophisticated enough to help you get home. I could probably come up with some theories, but unless I have data to go on they probably won’t be of any use to you.”

I shook my head. “You don’t need anything big and sophisticated – with just a few random bits of material I’ve watched you create wonders. And unless this world is even more drastically different from ours than I think it is, you should still have a place with that material on hand.”

“What do you mean?” Phineas wondered.

I smiled. “Remember SHED?”

My brother paused for a long, excruciating moment, and then he slowly began to smile. “Of course! I can’t believe I didn’t think of that! I haven’t been in the backyard of my parents’ home for a while but SHED should still be there so we could…” He hesitated. “…we could get a lab. We could probably even get the equipment, and a lot of it would still be lying around there anyway since I don’t think Ferb and I ever really cleaned it up. But even so, I’m not sure whether I could really pull something as complex as this off alone when I haven’t worked on anything in years.”

This was my final card to play, and everything was now riding on it. “What if I helped you with that?”

Phineas gave me a skeptical look. “You’re not telling me that you’re an inventor in your world too, are you Candace?”

“Not technically” I agreed. “But I’ve helped my brothers out on far more occasions than your sister probably has. I wouldn’t say I’m great at it, but I know enough about how you work and the material you work with to be able to remind you. It probably won’t be more than a kick-start to get you going, of course, but that just might be enough to get you on your way.”

Phineas was quiet for an awfully long time after that, and it was agonizing. It felt like I was balancing between hope and fear. If my brother didn’t want to help me, I – well, I supposed I could give it a try on my own, and there was always Ferb… but I’d still feel lost and miserable without him. He might not be my Phineas and he was a painful reminder of home, but he was a reminder of home nevertheless and an impetus to get back there. Not to mention that even if my other self was a jerk, I couldn’t picture her brother leaving her to her fate like that. Any version of Phineas, even a Phinbella!Phineas, should want to help.

Finally, he turned to me and nodded, and I let out a sigh of relief. My joy was strong enough that I could barely hear him mutter: “This does mean I’m going to have to cancel my flight back to Zurich.”

I frowned, being too unfamiliar with his profession to be able to tell how much trouble that was for him. “Can’t you just get someone to replace you, or postpone the whole affair for a few days?” I reasoned. “Knowing you, I’m confident you’ve been punching above your weight anyway. Getting some off-time for a family emergency can’t be that hard.”

Phineas got out his cell phone. “It’s not my job that I’m worried about.” He touched the screen a few times, and I could hear the phone connecting through the speaker. There was no hologram emerging, though – another sign of slightly retarded technology.

“Phineas?” Isabella’s voice eventually said. “Where are you?”

My brother’s counterpart looked a bit nervous – too nervous for someone who was calling his wife, and certainly too nervous for someone as confident as Phineas. “I’m at Danville Park” he said softly. “Candace and I took a walk around it after we dropped Vicky off, and she explained her problem at length. She’s got an important issue that only I can help her with, and it has to happen quickly.”

There was a brief pause at the other end of the line. “Are you saying you want me to cancel your afternoon flights?” Isabella said, her voice rising in indignation.

Ah, so that was what had Phineas so worried. I watched on as my brother began looking more and more… well, upset wasn’t the word, he was still relatively calm, but he certainly looked uncomfortable. “Yeah. Isabella, I know that you would have wanted me to spend more time at home for your and Vicky’s sake, but…”

Isabella started to reply, but she’d barely gotten a syllable out when her agitated voice suddenly became much softer and more distantly sounding – Phineas must have turned off the speaker phone, not wishing his counterpart’s sister to have to listen to his spousal quarrel. I could understand that.

In order to give my brother some space, I walked over to a nearby park bench and watched Phineas’ conversation on the phone. That is to say, Isabella’s monologue to Phineas, because it did not appear that she was giving my brother many chances to interrupt before rambling off again about something or another. I could see Phineas was still calm and trying to be the voice of reason (which I would indeed imagine him to be in a marriage with Isabella, even more so than he was in our own relationship back home) but that he was having a hard time doing that when he couldn’t even get a word in.

For the first time since he had announced that he wasn’t an inventor, I found myself feeling truly sorry for the poor guy.

It took about ten minutes before the phone call ended and Phineas sat down next to me. He was smiling at me, but it was clear that he was tired and exhausted by the argument. I considered just keeping mum about this altogether and switching back to what he was going to do to help me home, but… heck, I was too curious. I couldn’t help myself.

“Are you all right?” I said, trying to sound as concerned and sympathetic as possible. “It sounded like you and Isabella had a really rocky conversation.”

Phineas sighed, and his eyes fell. “Isabella was mad that I haven’t been home for longer than twenty-four hours in three weeks, and yet I asked her now to cancel everything because you had some kind of emergency going on. Remember back at our house, she implied that I was paying more attention to you than to her and Vicky? She said that again now, and she had another few choice words to say about it which I will not repeat.”

I nodded, hesitating about what I could and couldn’t say to him. I finally settled on briefly patting his shoulder first. Although he started at my touch, he made no attempts to stop me. “So, has… anything like this happened before?”

Phineas sat up straight and looked at me like a deer in the headlights. The poor guy actually seemed to be embarrassed. “What makes you say that?”

I smiled gently at him. “I know you, Phineas, probably better than my counterpart here knows you. I could see there was some… tension when you talked to Isabella earlier, and I noticed that wasn’t anything strange to Vicky.”

At the mention of his daughter, Phineas looked mortified. “I know” he muttered. “Vicky has been a witness to one of our little spats far too often. And I’ve tried not to cause them so often, I’ve tried to be a good husband and stop letting myself get carried away by work and other things, but…” He shook his head. “Getting to date and marry Isabella was like a dream come true. Becoming a father was even better. You’d think I’d be at home every day with my wife and daughter rather than being off for work all the time. It’s important, certainly, but I’m not home enough because of it and Isabella is right about that. And I _want_ to come home more often, it just…”

I hesitated. “It sounds to me…” An open look in my direction encouraged me to go on. “I know it’s not my place to say, but to me it sounds more like on these business trips, you’re subconsciously trying to _avoid_ going home and getting into all these arguments again.”

Phineas contemplated the thought. “I – I certainly _hope_ not” he whispered. “What kind of a person would I be if I did that, if I didn’t _want_ to be at home with my family? It’s not true, though. I am busy, but I’ve been trying to make more time for my wife and child. Vicky is my only daughter, and I love her, and…”

“…and what about Isabella?” I said.

It was out before I could really contemplate what I was saying, and Phineas gave me a confused and unsettled look. “What do you mean?”

Well, I’d come all this way already – might as well go for the full package. “What about Isabella? Do you love her, too?”

Phineas blinked. “Of course I love Isabella” he said instantaneously. “Why else do you think I married her? I got a crush on her when I was fourteen years old and entering high school, I slowly fell in love with her over the years and have had those feelings for her ever since, especially after I found out that she returned them.”

Huh, that was an even more unfamiliar story than what I’d been expecting (although I don’t know what I was expecting, really). It made me wonder at which point exactly our timelines diverged, but that was a question for another place and time. “I’m sure you love her” I said soothingly. “Isabella has been your friend for a long time, after all, and even my Phineas has a deep affection towards her. But are you confident that you’re _in_ love with her? That the feelings you have had for her over the past two decades are romantic in nature?”

Phineas gradually turned away from me on the bench. “Candace, I know how I feel.”

“Of course you do” I replied. And I could have left it there very easily, and the conversation would have merely ended on an awkward note. We would probably have forgotten all about it in an hour or so, certainly if Phineas returned the subject of the conversation to getting me back home. But since I was too deep into the conversation now, I… didn’t.

“But do you ever question those feelings, and why you have them?” The vibe I was getting from him was more confused than angry yet, so I forged on. “Phineas, could you explain to me how you and Isabella got together in the first place?”

My brother instantly smiled at that, and even after half a day of getting used to the idea that _still_ stung. “It happened when I was eighteen years old. I had already graduated high school but I was still oblivious to Isabella’s feelings for me. Ferb had already picked his college, but I still had to pick mine, so Buford and Baljeet came over to talk. I can’t remember whether I meant to ask them for advice or whether I just wanted some old-fashioned conversation about days gone by and a distraction from it all.”

I nodded. “I see. Where were Isabella and the other me at the time?”

“You were at law school” Phineas replied. “Isabella was out with the Fireside Girls. We’d been getting more distanced from each other for a while.”

That wasn’t exactly what I was expecting. “You were moving apart? I thought you said you had a crush on her.”

“I did” Phineas confirmed. “I think she was trying to let go of me because she thought I would never return her feelings.”

“I was asking about your feelings, not hers. Why didn’t you stop her if you were so in love with her?”

“I didn’t realize how far we’d moved apart until it had already happened. And I never said that I was in love with her, just that I had a crush on her.” He sighed, trying not to let his irritation show. “Can I go back to telling the story now?”

I frowned. “I guess so.”

“Thanks. So, the guys and I were talking and Isabella came up. I mentioned that I didn’t have a chance with her, and they told me she’d had a crush on me for years now.” I wanted to speak up, but decided at the last moment not to interrupt his story again because I didn’t want him to get too agitated. Better to wait until he was finished. “I was hurt, and asked them why they hadn’t told me before. They reminded me that guys didn’t talk about their feelings, but I still felt hurt about it all. I decided to go for a walk and clear my head, and then I ran into Isabella’s Mom at her family’s restaurant. She told me Isabella was leaving town for her college and how much she’d always wanted us to become a couple, so I decided to take off after her.” Restrain yourself, Candace… “I managed to intercept her before she could leave town. Apparently, she’d been reflecting on our relationship herself. I apologized to her and told her how I felt, and I decided to go to her college with her. Ferb, Buford, Baljeet and the Fireside Girls showed up – apparently they’d been trying to make something for a romantic dinner but it had disappeared – and they applauded for us.” As much as I probably shouldn’t have, I couldn’t stop myself from snorting there. “Isabella went off to college, but I decided that I couldn’t leave her with just that, so I caught up to her and gave her a final – and first – kiss. Two weeks later, we started college together, and we’ve been together ever since.”

My brother had a fond, reminiscent smile on his face, and looking at it I took a deep breath, knowing what I needed to say would wipe it right off. “Phineas?”

“Yeah?”

“Please don’t take this the wrong way, but that sounds like a bad fan fiction story. And I should know, I _write_ the stuff.”

My brother’s reaction was more surprised than angry, which was a relief to be honest because I wasn’t sure how he was going to react. “What do you mean?”

I counted the deficiencies on my fingers. “If you’d been having a crush on Isabella for years, why didn’t Ferb do something with it – he knew Isabella had those feelings for you, or at least I presume he did in this universe too, so why wouldn’t he tell Isabella that those feelings would be returned if she confessed them? Did Isabella’s Mom just happen to bring up Isabella’s crush on you on the same day you talked to your friends about it for the first time ever? Did the Fireside Girls and the guys seriously _applaud_ at you getting together with her – do you have any idea how cheesy that is, especially if they apparently didn’t care very much before that… and you’re not going to tell me Ferb joined in with them, too?”

“He didn’t” Phineas said softly. “And he didn’t tell Isabella before because he didn’t know about my feelings for her. I never thought it would serve any purpose to tell him.”

I had to spend a few seconds just staring at him after he said that. “You didn’t tell **_Ferb_**? You – _how_ serious did you say this crush was?”

Phineas looked up at me and hesitated briefly. I could see a flash of frustration in his eyes, but it was gone the next moment. “I didn’t tell Ferb because I grew to be a more private person over time” he said on a steeled tone. “Not to mention the fact that my feelings grew stronger as time went on. At first, what I felt for Isabella was so unclear in my mind that I didn’t know what I was feeling, but later I realized that it had to be love.”

“Was it?” I instantly (albeit perhaps unwisely) reacted.

Phineas remained quiet for a few more moments, and I wondered whether he was going to say anything at all before I heard a soft “What do you mean?”

I sighed. “I’m just going to ignore the whole ‘not telling Ferb’ thing, which I’m still not buying by the way because if you had displayed any feelings at all at any point I’m sure Ferb would have noticed even if you _hadn’t_ actually told him – that’s how he found out the you I know had a crush on me, and he actually managed to find that out sooner than you did which is probably a first in the global history of relationships – but are you certain that what you felt for Isabella was love? Phineas, Isabella has always been your best female friend. It’s only natural that when she matured from a girl into a young woman, and you got through puberty and gradually started noticing girls in general, that you would notice her. Heck, even my Phineas once said that Isabella had grown to be attractive over the years, and that was when the two of us had already been dating for two or three years.”

“Your point being?” Phineas said curtly, and though his head turned away from me I could tell that I struck a nerve but that he was refusing to admit it. Seriously, this whole brooding thing was weird and out of character for him, probably even in this dimension.

I continued unabated, because I was on a roll now and was going to make my point no matter what my brother would think of it. “If you noticed Isabella as a girl for the first time while being unfamiliar with romance in general, it’s natural that you would come to think that maybe you had a crush on her, and that that thought would haunt your mind until you were absolutely sure. It sounds like the right time frame, too – the other Candace would have been off to college right around the time you entered high school, leaving you with no… distractions, so to speak. And so, you believed you had a crush on Isabella, with only the fact that you didn’t tell Ferb or anyone else about it being evidence for how weak those feelings really were. Come that summer you just told me about, you and Isabella start drifting apart, your subconscious panics and wants to fix the relationship with romance as a more permanent glue than friendship, bam. Instant love affair, just add water. But that’s not how romance works, Phineas.”

My brother clenched his fists and shook his head. “I don’t believe this. Do you really think you can tell me what I do and don’t feel for Isabella? Whether or not I made a _mistake_ by starting to date her? Candace, like I said before, I know how I feel! If I say I love Isabella, my _wife_ , then I love Isabella!”

I wondered whether that ‘wife’ remark was a jab at the fact that my Phineas and I weren’t legally married (which it couldn’t have been in retrospect because I hadn’t even told him that yet, but I have to admit that I was getting carried away at this point and wasn’t thinking straight anymore). It only got me more frustrated with the other-ness of this dimension and more determined to ‘fix’ it. “Of course you do. You’ve been living together for thirteen years now, you’ve got a daughter together. I can understand why you wouldn’t want to say there were no real romantic feelings involved from the start, because you’re committed to that relationship now. But when you keep being under pressure from her to be someone you’re not, when you’re not looking forwards to coming home because it means you’ll have to conform to her expectations again or risk an argument, your romantic _present_ doesn’t look so sound. And you have never broadened your horizons beyond that initial ‘crush’, have you Phineas? You haven’t even talked to my counterpart in months. Have you ever really allowed yourself to think about how you feel about her? I know I was your hero when you were a kid, way beyond what I deserved, and our bond has been unique and special from the day you were born. I haven’t been able to evade that even when I still tried, and your counterpart has always embraced it – and we’re _happy_. We’re a family, Phineas and I are closer than we’ve ever been when we were ‘just’ siblings, and our relationship is much better off than it is in your world, with you being a workaholic and me being neurotic in all the wrong ways, and apparently we haven’t even properly spoken to each other in months which is seriously messed up from both sides. That bond between us is old and strong, Phineas, and it is so messed up in this dimension that it hurts to watch it, and deep inside you have to know that that matters more than whatever you think you feel for Isabella, so if you’d just listen to _reason_ then you and your Candace could…”

Phineas’ head snapped up again.

“ENOUGH!”

I had never seen Phineas so angry before. Then again, I had never said something quite so infuriating to him before.

“H-how could you!” Phineas snapped. He stood up and glared at me. “How could you say something like that about me and Isabella, and try to fit us into your own twisted model of how the world works? Did _I_ ever say _you_ shouldn’t be with your world’s Phineas? I didn’t, because although it sounds strange to me and I’m uncomfortable with it it’s all in another dimension and thus none of my business – just like _my_ love life is of no business to _you_! I never thought you’d be so arrogant to just presume that the only way I could be happy is by being with you!”

He started stalking off in the direction of the car, and I began to realize that I’d just made a big, big mistake. It took me a few seconds of resolving what to do, but eventually I still ran after him. I caught up with him at the exit to the park. “Phineas, that’s not it at all! I – I admit I went a little far there but all I was trying to do was make you happy, and I can tell that _you’re_ not and that _my_ Phineas is! I…” I noticed he was walking towards the car. “Where are you going?”

Phineas stopped at the car door and turned to me, sighing. “I’m going home, Candace. To Isabella. To _the woman I love_.” He got into the car and firmly shut the door behind him.

I tapped on the window, there not being anything else I could do. “Phineas, you – you can’t just leave me here! I’m sorry, I…”

Phineas opened the window, and for a moment I thought I saw hesitation in his eyes – and then it was replaced by a deeper regret. “I know Isabella and I haven’t got the best marriage, Candace,” he said softly. “But what you just said was really uncalled for. I… I think I need to be away from you for a while. I can’t do this right now. If you really want help to get home, you should probably get in contact with Ferb – his phone number should be at your counterpart’s house.” He sighed again. “I’m leaving.”

The window went up and the car drove away from the high school, and as I stared after him the pain and hurt in my brother’s eyes stuck with me. I hadn’t meant everything I’d said to him, although I couldn’t help but feel that at least some part of it was true. But I had hurt him, and that action had consequences.

My best hope to get home had left, and I honestly didn’t know what to do anymore.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just some notes on references in this chapter: 
> 
> \- The magic reference is derived almost directly from Act Your Age, where on Phineas' inquiry Ferb says about Camford on Oxbury that it's "not a wizard school. Well, there is some wizarding.” I'm not sure what that says about whether or not Harry Potter is fictional in PnF.  
> \- Vanessa is vice-president because of one line from Phineas and Ferb Quantum Boogaloo, when Linda says that Phineas is in Switzerland and Ferb is in Camp David. There was a whole discussion about that in the fandom because it appeared to refer to Ferb being the President of the USA, which is unlikely due to his British origin making him ineligible, or whether he couldn't be there for so many other reasons that had nothing to do with him being in politics. Some, however, suggested that Vanessa might be the president. I decided to use that idea (it's not like I'll be doing much with the Act Your Age-verse after this story anyway) but have her be vice-president just for a variation on the theme.  
> \- FLS Candace's initial criticisms of Act Your Age are broadly similar to the ones I had when I first watched the episode, although there are a few things (like the cheesy 'romantic' song, or the canonically irrational age difference that I just retconned here) that I couldn't criticize because it wouldn't make sense for Phineas to tell her about it. 
> 
> By the way, if anyone thinks Phineas' outburst was too strong, please leave something about it in the comments. Phineas has been known to snap when he's upset (take for instance his reaction to Perry being a secret agent, or the 'get on the trike' moment, and FLS Candace did go pretty far here. Just rest assured that the breach between them isn't going to be permanent.


	9. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And the FLS Chapter. A lot less eventful than the one in the AYA-world, but it's not without its consequences either. If only Candace was less biased and more rational... and that goes for both of them.
> 
> Also, I wanted to note that I finally fixed the tagging system for this chapter. It had been annoying me for some time now - to me at least, tagging orders are serious business. If I am going to tag romantic ships, friendships and characters, then I'll tag them - when possible - in order of their relative importance to the fic. That's the most fair to the reader, after all.

**_ Chapter Eight _ **

Wednesday, June 30th 2037  
6:00 PM    
Danville  
FLS-Verse

I hadn’t really thought I could get bored in a universe where my brother and I were committing incest – especially because, as I should probably remind you at this stage, it had only been half a night and a morning since I first arrived in this universe – but over the course of the day some boredom did set in. Phineas was mixing working on all sorts of complicated equations with going up into the building and checking on his employees. Apparently he had some work to do in his office as well, a place which I didn’t bother to visit because by the time he went there I just felt done. There was no point. If Phineas couldn’t help me, what was the point of anything?

My glum attitude lasted for much of the day, even if, to be fair to him, Phineas tried to do his best to help fix it and did work hard (when he had the time) to help me get home. He even wore his constant smile on his face, which should have been sweet and comforting but just felt aggravating. (Well, maybe it was a little bit comforting. Still mostly annoying, though.) But by the end of the day, we hadn’t booked all that much progress. It was likely that I was in this for the long run.

I’m sure I haven’t asked for this, I thought to myself as we finally left Flynn-Fletcher Incorporated and started the drive back to Phineas’ house. I’ve never asked for bad luck, it just seems to find me. I knew I couldn’t blame Phineas and Ferb for all of it, especially since they weren’t involved in whatever mechanism prevented me from busting them for all those years, but I could certainly blame this Phineas for me being stuck here. The only reason I didn’t was… I’m actually not sure why I didn’t, to be honest. I suppose the main part of it was that I could still see in his eyes then that he was just as upset with this situation as I was, and I didn’t want to make it even worse for him. No matter how much the relationship between him and my counterpart freaked me out, I was at this time still willing to believe that at least some part of him had my best interests at heart. He was a version of my brother, after all.

We got ‘home’ to see the kids had already set the table for dinner – which was probably only natural, since we were a lot later than normal work hours usually extended to, another sign that Phineas had in fact done everything he could to help me out. I knew it felt a bit immature, but I still avoided looking at Xavier’s face when possible. The orange strands in his hair, so similar to mine, combined with the face that screamed ‘Phineas!’ made his ancestry so clear that I couldn’t escape it anymore, and I had to escape at least _some_ of it all if I wanted to keep my sanity. Instead I focused on the food on the table. It was a cheese pizza, which was actually a pleasant surprise because I liked them and the stress of the day had made me hungry, but I couldn’t resist making a jab about it. I wanted some of the light-hearted mood from before back, even if it was just for a moment before the night would undoubtedly make everything worse again. “Pancakes and pizza in one day?” I said teasingly. “You really are spoiling those kids.”

Phineas smiled curiously at me. “What do you – wait, you haven’t got modified food in your world, have you?”

“It depends on what you mean by that” I replied, wondering why this conversation was suddenly going in an entirely different direction compared to what I’d intended for it. “If you’re talking about genetic modification…”

My brother chuckled and shook his head. “No, that isn’t it – well, I suppose to a certain extent that is exactly what it is, but not in the way you’re thinking of it. Ferb and I invented a formula which reduces fat and increases both vitamins and metabolism rate, applicable to any food category you can imagine! As such, becoming overweight really isn’t a danger anymore here, even though _variety_ in a diet is still important.”

I had to process that for a few seconds as Phineas sat down and divided up the pizza into slices. Without thinking, I sat down next to him and opposite the kids. The pizza looked exactly like I would have expected any pizza at home to look, and the smell didn’t give any indication that this was a healthier version either. And yet this formula had somehow managed to eliminate overweight as a problem? Come to think of it, I hadn’t seen anyone who was above average weight all day. Personally, I had never had too many problems with maintaining my weight, but I did go through some effort to keep up a healthy diet. If that suddenly wasn’t needed anymore…

…well, let’s just say that I had suddenly found an unexpected bonus to this incest-ridden world.

“…one for you, one for you, and one for me” I just caught Phineas saying through my astonishment as a slice of pizza was left on my plate. I tentatively prodded at it with my fork, but as I noticed Xavier and Amanda eagerly digging in while Phineas took a bite and smiled encouragingly at me, I also took a piece. Didn’t taste half-bad.

I had only just started eating when I heard my counterpart’s son speak up. “Amanda, can you get me some grape juice?”

“Of course!” Amanda gushed, stepping up and fetching the carton from the sink. She got a glass and poured it in. “Here you go, bro!”

It was a little too over the top, and apparently Xavier had noticed the same thing. He smirked. “Is there something you need from me, sister?”

Amanda hesitated. “Well… you know, if you have time, could you help me with my final essay for school? I think I’ve got it all fixed, but I’m not sure if it’s good enough and if I fail again…” Her voice trailed off at the end, and she stared anxiously at her brother.

Xavier remained silent for a few moments, his face unreadable, leaving Amanda in a moment of tension. Then he finally gave her a good-natured grin. “Oh, all right then.”

Amanda looked relieved and briefly put an arm around her brother’s shoulder. “Thanks.”

Phineas smiled affectionately at his kids. “You know Amanda, sucking up like that really isn’t the most honest way to get your brother to do something for you.”

“Well, I’m not going to act like you and Mom” Amanda said teasingly. “Especially since Xavier already has a girlfriend.”

“You’re acting like you’re certain that flirting with me would have even worked” Xavier joined in, grinning.

Amanda turned to her brother, put her hand beneath her head and an elbow on the table, twirling a lock of her hair with her other hand. “Come on, bro. If I really flirted with you, you’d give me anything I wanted in an instant. The only reason I’m not taking that approach is because I don’t want to hurt your girlfriend’s feelings and I don’t feel that way about you.”

Xavier snorted. “And you think _I_ could feel that way about you?”

“Why wouldn’t you?” Amanda challenged him.

“Well…” Xavier smirked. “I don’t want to lord it over you, but let’s not forget that I have a girlfriend, and you don’t have a boyfriend. You and your flirting skills are not _that_ awesome, Mandy.”

“So what?” Amanda said, clearly at least partly annoyed for real now. “How does that make any difference? Dad had never gone further than holding hands with a girl before he got Mom, and she basically fell for him over the course of a single night, didn’t you… Mom…” Her voice faltered as she and I made eye contact. “Oh. Right. Sorry.”

I smiled as well as I could. “It’s okay” I lied. It wasn’t their fault that she couldn’t talk about her parents’ romance without me being uncomfortable – that burden was all on the Phineas and Candace of this dimension.

The conversation continued awkwardly and eventually got underway again. For the rest of the night, however, the pattern was established. Xavier and Amanda would talk about things going on with their lives, at one point when they were caught up in the story the fact that I was not the mother they were familiar with would slip their minds briefly, and awkwardness would ensue. It was a constant reminder to me of how unnatural this ‘family’ was, and it was successful in killing off conversation between us for the rest of the night.

After dinner, Phineas retired to go to the lab beneath the house. It was an easy decision for me to remain in the living room and hang out with the kids, and we ended up watching a movie together. The movie was a welcome distraction from this bizarre existence, and when Xavier and Amanda went off to their room to play video games or whatever they wanted to do – not my kids, not my business – I was actually feeling pretty good about myself. Perhaps Phineas would actually have stumbled upon the solution in the meantime and I could go home. Of course it was not very likely, but a woman can dream, right?

I checked the underground lab, which was dark, dusty and empty. I wondered if the other me didn’t care about keeping it clean or whether she just didn’t bother. Knowing Phineas’ tendency to clutter, the latter was probably the most likely option. I got to the stairs and was just wondering whether to go up when I heard voices coming from the second floor. I walked in the direction of the noise and noticed the door next to the bedroom I’d woken up in was slightly ajar. Almost without thinking, I peeked through the gap.

Phineas had his back turned to me and was looking at a video screen. From where I was standing, I could identify Ferb and Isabella, both dressed in outfits that would not look out of place in an Indiana Jones movie. From what little I could see of the nature behind them, they were in a jungle of some sorts.

“Are you sure?” Isabella was just saying.

“Absolutely” Phineas assured her. “It’s not me you need to worry about, it’s Candace – and how we’re going to get her home. I’ll be fine as long as she is safe – and of course, the Candace that is trapped in her body now needs to return to her home dimension.”

Isabella nodded. “Of course. How is she taking it, by the way? It can’t be easy to have to deal with someone from a world that’s so different from ours, especially if she wasn’t expecting the transfer.”

Phineas nodded. “She’s been doing unexpectedly well, actually. Sure, she flipped out when she heard that her counterpart and I were together, but apart from that I haven’t noticed any incidents happening. It makes sense – she does want to get home as soon as possible, after all.” A task Phineas hadn’t exactly been very effective at thus far, I had to add in my mind. “But then again, I probably wouldn’t notice if she was behaving unusually, especially since she’s a counterpart of Candace’s from another dimension so how would I know just what is ‘normal’ to her?”

“Good point” Isabella agreed. “Does she appear to be more stressed out than usual?”

Phineas frowned. “Well, she did snap at me twice this morning – once when I told her about Flynn-Fletcher Incorporated and she wanted to bust us to Mom, and then because I told her she would be stuck there for a few more days. But the rest of the time she has been quiet and accommodating – more so than I’d expect from her, in fact. I wonder whether she might be like a ticking time bomb in that way. It… it makes me uncomfortable.”

I had to close the door for a moment because I was seething there. _Phineas_ felt uncomfortable around me? Phineas, who had had sexual relations with his own sister? Did he realize how messed up that was, or was he that crazy? I wanted to barge in there and give him a piece of my mind so badly, but I managed to keep my emotions under control by clinging onto the door handle. I still needed him.

I still needed him. And as long as that was true, I couldn’t do anything.

I forced my attention back to the conversation, where Isabella was just talking to Ferb about why he shouldn’t call off their vacation to go home. I instantly decided I didn’t like her here.

“But Candace will…” Ferb was saying.

“Your sister will be fine” Isabella replied. I couldn’t see her face from where I was standing anymore, because she had shifted closer to my stepbrother. “I know this sounds like an emergency, but it can’t be one. You’ve always come through whatever came onto your path. And you can just communicate with Phineas from here, and going home would likely take longer than Phineas getting her back on his own would take, unless you want to make a teleporter out of leaves or something like that. We haven’t had a family trip like this in a long time, Ferbs.” I could hear her kiss his cheek. “I want to have a good time out here. With the kids, and with you.” She and Ferb snuggled up close to each other.

“Mooom!” A girl’s voice came through the screen. “Dad! Not in front of the campsite! Gross!”

“Aw, come on Angie,” a slightly younger feminine voice said. “I think Mom and Dad are cute together. In a way.”

“Also, you can just move if you don’t want to see us” Isabella added, turning towards her daughter with a smile on her face.

“Mom’s right” the second voice continued. “I think you’re just upset that you don’t get to do that kind of stuff with Xavier for a week.”

“Really, Milly?” Angie replied. “You think I can’t last for a week without my boyfriend? How clingy do you think I am! I’m not like Aunt Candace.”

“Are too.”

“Am not!”

“Are too!” Milly’s voice sounded teasing in a manner which she was probably well aware was childish but which she had no problem using to annoy her older sister. “Are too, are too…”

Siblings. Can’t live with them, can’t live… actually, forget that last part.

A young male voice cut in. “I’m sorry, but is that actually a straight-forward use of the words anymore or just a Space Adventure reference?”

There was a brief pause. “…most of us aren’t as much of a nerd as you are, Frederick Fletcher” Angie replied dryly.

“I didn’t even get it” Milly added. “What Space Adventure reference is he talking about?”

“Are too” Angie explained. “You know, like the name of the robot guy from those movies?”

“Ooh, right” Milly said, groaning. “Yeah, that really _is_ kinda cringe-worthy, Fred.”

From my side of the screen, Phineas chuckled. “Some things never change, do they?”

“They definitely don’t” Isabella replied. “But just wait and see until they get in a real emergency and how much that’ll change Angie’s tone to her beloved twin brother.”

“Hey!” Angie yelled.

“Love you too, sweetie!” Isabella yelled back, before turning to the screen and looking more somber again. “Look, Phineas – it’s not that we don’t want to help you out, but it would be such a hassle to pack up everything and return to civilization for the long trip home, and… well, I just can’t believe it would turn out to be that kind of an emergency.” There was a definite undercurrent of uncertainty in her voice. She was probably embarrassed about talking down the importance of saving me, as she should be. “You’ve always fixed everything. It’ll be fine. She’ll fine. You just have to remember that, Phineas.”

My brother nodded. “I know, Izzy” he replied softly. “This entire situation just makes me feel… you know, a lot like I felt just after we first fell in love. I told you about that, didn’t I? The whole incident with the cruise ship?”

Isabella nodded. “Yeah, I know. But that’s not something you need to worry about, Phineas. Everything will work itself out, like it always does.” Ferb gave a nod in affirmation.

Okay, that just got creepy. Not in a way that I hadn’t already begun to fear, but it was still a chilling confirmation to hear him talking about feeling stuff for me, rather than just my counterpart. I barely caught what Phineas was saying next due to my chills. “I know my worries are unfounded,” he replied, “but the fact that I’m all alone doesn’t help there. I could never ask you to come over and break up what you’ve got going right now, but it’s a heavy burden to have to do this all by myself.”

Isabella sighed. “Phineas, are you sure you can’t get Baljeet Tjinder involved? He might not be a mechanic or have your creative spark, but he is intelligent in his own right. Sure, you haven’t spoken to him in a while, but that doesn’t mean you can’t ask him for help on anything.”

Phineas shook his head. “You know I can’t do that, Isabella” he said carefully. “I can’t involve him without telling him about us, and I don’t want to tell anyone about us without Candace.”

 I didn’t exactly hear what he said after that, because I became too distracted by the suggestion that had just been offered up – and discarded again right away. Of course he could go to Baljeet for help, and Baljeet could help speed up the process of helping Phineas save me – but he wouldn’t do it! He refused, just because he couldn’t ask his Ca – his sister for permission. Well, he could ask _me_ , and it wasn’t like he had been doing a stellar job of separating the two of us so far. As far as I knew, this was just an excuse. A chill went up my spine as I wondered whether I would ever get to go home again.

I had been wondering when the best moment would be to announce my presence, or whether I should just leave and give Phineas no indication I’d overheard their chat, but just as I was considering the latter might be sensible after what I’d just heard Phineas say about me (and after the conversation had slipped from the issues surrounding me towards discussing the more boring topic of Ferb and Isabella’s kids) Ferb suddenly stared beyond Phineas and directly at me. “Candace?” he said softly.

Phineas took a second to catch on, but then he swiveled around to face me, and although part of me wanted to close the door and walk away the other part reminded me that I had the full right to listen to a conversation about me and that I certainly didn’t need to be embarrassed in front of _this_ Phineas. I straightened my posture and stepped into the room, nevertheless sticking close to the room. “I overheard you talking” I said unapologetically. “Did you tell Ferb about what happened?”

From the corner of my eye I could see Isabella frowning just a bit at being left out, which I paid no mind. They needed to understand that to me, this wasn’t just a family conversation in which Phineas filled in his brother and the woman who was his wife in this world – something which, oddly enough, still bothered me almost as much as the whole thing between the other Phineas and me did – on what had happened and they all had a good laugh about the crazy stuff we Flynn-Fletchers get into. This was serious. I wanted to get home, and the only reason I was sticking around here was that Phineas and Ferb were the only people who could help me with that.

“I did” Phineas said, obviously trying to be calm and gentle in order to soothe my emotions. “He gave me some advice about what I could do to fix our situation, but we can’t really work together when we’re so far apart.” I noticed that he wasn’t mentioning the Baljeet thing again – his determination in not wanting to involve his old friend was obvious. Odd. If there was one thing I had thought was unlike Phineas, it’d be a determination to do everything by himself. He and Ferb had always worked together on everything in our universe. Of course, Ferb was his stepbrother and Baljeet just a friend, so perhaps there had been something of that exclusivist sentiment in Phineas all along. Or maybe it was just another thing that was just irreparably different and wrong about this world.

  “I see” I said slowly. “And have you and Ferb been able to come up with anything to fix that problem?”

“We haven’t, yet” Phineas replied. “We’re still trying, though. Don’t worry, Candace. We’ll get you home.”

 _One day_ , I mentally added, which was what he was probably thinking even if he wasn’t saying it. And that was about as reassuring as Stacy telling me ‘one day you’ll bust the boys’ or Jeremy’s ‘I’m sure your mental problems will be over one day’, and the look I gave Phineas was about as appreciative as that statement deserved. The result was that a coolness spread through the room which was, from the expression on their faces, also felt by Ferb and Isabella some two thousand miles away.

“It’s already past ten” Isabella finally said. “We’d best leave you to sort out your own things now. I’m sure it’ll be a long and busy day tomorrow for both of our groups.”

“Yeah, you’re right” Phineas responded awkwardly. “See you tomorrow, Ferb, Isabella.”

I gave my alternate brother and sister-in-law a nod as they signed off, and just like that it was Phineas and me again. He instantly got to work on clearing out boxes off the bed in the room, trying to avoid my looks. Which was fitting, because I had been struggling with wanting to avoid _him_ all day.

In all the hectic events that had happened before, I hadn’t even fully noticed what kind of room I had stepped in to, but now that I did I took the opportunity to look around. It was a bedroom, but one with only one bed in it and science posters on the wall. I gave Phineas a questioning look the next time he looked up and he nodded. “This is my room. I don’t remember if I told you this before, but Candace and I maintain appearances for visitors who don’t know about our relationship. Having a spare bedroom which I supposedly sleep in is a necessary precaution. Of course, since I don’t actually sleep there nine out of ten times, the room tends to get cluttered. But I figured you’d prefer sleeping here over another night in the master bedroom anyway.”

I could literally not nod fast or eagerly enough. “I’d like that, yes.” Part of me even appreciated that Phineas went out of his way to take care of my needs with regard to sleeping separately from him, although most of me pointed out that the room had already been there anyway. It was only logical for me to use it now.

But nothing was really logical here, was it? I couldn’t help but muse about that as Phineas finished taking off the boxes and headed over to the other bedroom, at my request only returning with my counterpart’s pajamas and a final wistful look that crept me out before disappearing for the night as I lay down on the bed. Nothing was logical here. Phineas slept with me, they had kids together, they had a life together, and now apparently he was in no hurry to get her back. And from his perspective that made sense, because I was already there.

Was Phineas really that indifferent about replacing his sister with me, though? I had seen that he did love this world’s Candace in his own twisted way, and I obviously wasn’t a very willing accomplice in his scheme if he did want to experience a bit of the Candace he knew again now that she was gone. I knew that if my Jeremy would be replaced by the Jeremy of this dimension, I’d… well, I wouldn’t know what I would feel actually. He wouldn’t be my Jeremy, of course, but I could probably still be attracted to him.

I wasn’t doing myself any favors by continuing to think about this, was I?

Sighing, I pulled my blankets over my head and tried to sleep. At least this time I had a bed and a room to myself. It was an improvement on last night, that was for sure.

It just wasn’t improvement enough.


	10. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And here is another chapter. Candace has got a lot to talk and think about, and might possibly need to question some of her own choices. Fun times?

**_ Chapter Nine _ **

Wednesday, June 30th 2037  
1:30 PM  
Danville  
AYA-Verse

For the first hour or so after Phineas had left me at Danville Park, I just wandered around doing nothing. It wasn’t so much that I didn’t know where to go – I could go back to Jeremy’s place, I could look Ferb up, even if from what Phineas had said earlier about him and Vanessa he might be all the way over in Washington right now. Sure, he would probably come over if I asked him to, but…

It didn’t feel right. None of it did, but the idea of accepting that Phineas wasn’t going to help me again stung the most. I could see why he wouldn’t want to, as a bit of reflection allowed me to realize how hurt he had probably been by my words (I should really try not to get carried away too much in monologues anymore). But mentally, I wasn’t prepared to just let that be the end of it. I loved Phineas, and although my main priority was to get back to the one I knew I wanted this version of him to be involved as well. I wasn’t even sure why – all I knew was that I really wanted to find something inside him that would tell me that no matter how different our worlds were, he was still the same person he had always been.

It took me a long time before I finally headed back in the direction of the house that was my and Jeremy’s home in this dimension. It took me some time to find it because I hadn’t been paying a lot of attention to where it was in Danville this morning, not to mention that my primary orientation landmark – Flynn-Fletcher Incorporated – was gone. Vanessa’s Dad’s house was still there, though, and by recalling the journey we had made from Phineas’ house to the school and before that from my counterpart’s house to Phineas’ place, I could eventually track down the place I was supposed to go to. Which of course reminded me of the fact that I had left the Johnson family car behind at Phineas’ house, but I was in no mood to go and get it right now.

Jeremy wasn’t home and didn’t come back right away, nor did the kids. Therefore, a good deal of the afternoon was simply spent reading books and watching television, anything to take my mind of the issues at hand which I was probably not going to find a solution to on my own anyway. It worked – for a few moments, I could really imagine that I was just at a friend’s house with nothing strange going on and nothing for me to do but to relax.

It didn’t last long. Jeremy came home from his work at 5 PM, having apparently picked up all three of the kids from wherever they had been for most of the afternoon (I didn’t dare to ask). Part of me wondered whether they had been out for normal reasons, or whether (as I feared) my outburst that morning had made Jeremy worried about me to the extent that he believed some time alone would help me. (Which it had, of course, but I didn’t like the thought that I would ever be considered too fragile to handle my own kids. I knew Phineas would never do that. But perhaps I was over thinking it.)

Only when my ‘husband’ and the kids got home did I realize that I should probably have prepared some kind of dinner, and the fact that I hadn’t earned me disappointed looks which I fortunately was able to soothe by calling a nearby fries store. But as one thing tends to lead to another and conversations can easily turn into entirely different directions, I was suddenly forced to explain to Jeremy why I needed to borrow his car keys because my car just wasn’t there anymore.

I told him a modified story of what had happened that day... by which I mean that I basically just told him that Phineas and I had met up and talked about the problems I’d mentioned that morning and which I had believed he would be able to fix, but that we had an argument when discussing the past and his relationship with Isabella. At that point Jeremy grew somber, but he didn’t say anything so I couldn’t really draw conclusions from that. I mean, I guess my own counterpart might have raised the issue of Phineas and Isabella’s marriage problems before? Either that, or Jeremy himself had noticed there was trouble in paradise. Regardless of which one it was, it proved to me that not everyone here was blind to the fact that Phineas and Isabella simply did not work together.

It really is too bad how little being right helps sometimes, though. Throughout the evening, which I spent leafing through some of my counterpart’s papers and pretending to work (and in the process discovering she was a full-blown lawyer, which impressed me and which, unlike the previous discovery that she was married to Jeremy, made me a little jealous of my other self for the first time) I waited for a call from the Flynn residence. (It was odd to think that that wasn’t what my own home in this dimension was called anymore.) Nothing happened. Apparently not even my car still being parked in front of the house could persuade Phineas and Isabella to contact me again. And I didn’t dare to make the first move. Not yet, at least.

Fortunately, my evening wasn’t entirely wasted. Although I got no closer to getting home (apart from my probably unrealistic hope that I would simply shift back overnight) I did get the opportunity to observe my counterpart’s kids a little while they were doing their homework, playing a video game and watching TV. The main thing that struck me about them was how normal they were. Xavier and Fred played normal video games and watched normal TV channels, rather than inventing a machine that would have sucked them into the game or allowed them to channel their own adventures into the TV or something crazy like that. In fact, I didn’t hear Xavier mentioning anything about inventing all night – and as for Fred, he didn’t say much at all, apart from repeating some things his brother said. If I hadn’t known for sure that he was my stepbrother, I could have sworn Fred had inherited his Uncle Ferb’s genes.

Actually, I take that back. Ferb may be quiet, but he does have thoughts of his own. From what little I could see of him for now, Fred seemed at times to be almost a clone of Xavier.

As for Amanda, one thing I noticed about her was that, apart from acting mostly like the girl I knew, she acted a little irritated whenever she talked to her brothers. I wondered whether that was just coincidence, or whether it was my own bad relationship with my brother here leaking into my children’s bonds with each other (or lack thereof). I decided to ask her the next morning, not wanting to talk about any of this while Jeremy was still around.

Eventually nighttime rolled around, and the time came that I once more had to share a bed with someone who wasn’t Phineas (whom I hoped would forgive me for this if he ever found out and if I ever got home). And where that would have been awkward enough, the looks Jeremy gave me as I got up the stairs and was about to head to ‘our’ bedroom told me enough. He had noticed my unusual behavior, and he wanted to talk to me.

I got undressed, taking care that I shielded my modesty while at the same time not making Jeremy realize that I was behaving more prudishly around him than his wife should. Thereafter I tried to lay down and ignore him as much as possible. It didn’t work. I could practically feel his eyes staring at my back. After a few minutes, I finally rolled over.

Jeremy looked directly at me for a few seconds, and I felt a bit of regret for how I’d treated him when I saw the discomfort and genuine concern in his eyes. “Candace,” he said softly, “what’s wrong?” I didn’t reply. “Is that thing with Phineas still bothering you?”

“I guess” I replied, suddenly wondering whether this might be the time to get the answer to a question that had plagued me for some time. “Jeremy, do you think it’s odd that Phineas and I don’t have the same bond that we used to? I mean, we were pretty close when we were kids… right?”

Jeremy remained silent for a few moments. “There has certainly been more distance between the two of you over the past years than there used to be” he replied. “But that’s natural, Candace. You two are grown up now, and you have your own lives. No one blames you for not being over at your brother’s house all the time. He’s busy with his career and his family, and so are you. I haven’t seen Suzy in a few weeks either. And after all, you’ve never been _that_ close when you were younger.”

I flipped over to face him, puzzled. “What do you mean?”

Jeremy looked a little taken aback at my sudden prompting. “Well, you _were_ always trying to bust him and Ferb” he said softly. “I’m not saying that you two ever actively disliked each other, but you can’t deny that you were constantly working against him. That’s what Dr. Baumer says, isn’t it? That although you clearly loved – and still love – your siblings, the way you treated them when you got carried away in busting mode might have left negative influences in their subconscious where, even if they were oblivious or indifferent to your busting at the time, they might have gained a negative opinion of you over the years that has contributed to you two drifting apart, while you yourself were so used to seeing them as opponents in busting mode that you couldn’t just see them as your loving siblings in non-busting mode anymore. In fact, I hoped earlier that the fact that you were going over to Phineas’ house for the first time in a while meant that you’d finally get a chance to do what Doc Baumer suggested and really talk to him about your issues.”

I was silenced for a moment, wondering what Other Candace’s doctor – or was he her psychiatrist? – did and didn’t know about my relationship with my brother in this universe. It certainly didn’t sound right, though. Phineas had never let me trying to bust him bother him until he knew the truth about that, and although I had been annoyed with him from time to time that had never carried over into my relationship with him outside ‘busting time’. We might not always have been as close then as he and Ferb had been or as he and I currently were in my own dimension, but we were close. We watched movies together, I came to him for help when I needed it… falling in love with him had added a new layer to our relationship, but it had not created a relationship from scratch.

Nevertheless, the thought that busting could have had a negative influence on our relationship in this dimension sort of did ring a bell, if I was willing to be fair about it. I didn’t exactly like the thought, but… well, it was true that Phineas was mad at me when he found out I’d been trying to get him in trouble. He even broke up with me over it (well, over that and the whole thing with Isabella) and although we reconciled a few weeks later part of me could see how that event could have developed very differently if Phineas and I hadn’t been dating beforehand and romance had never been a factor in our relationship. In our world, we had had a few good talks about my issues with his inventions and I had come to embrace them and be at ease with them. I accepted and admired what my brothers could do now, as part of me always had but had never been willing to admit it. If this Candace had gone from busting her brothers when she was a teenager to considering herself too old to bust when she became an adult without ever talking to Phineas (and Ferb) about why she’d always wanted to do it… well, suddenly I had a partial explanation for why she and Phineas had drifted apart in this world. In my heart I had to admit that it certainly sounded more plausible than my own wishful-thinking explanation that it was the strain of being with other people, of loving each other but being in denial about it, that had compelled this Phineas and Candace to keep their distance from each other. (Even if I wasn’t fully giving up on that theory yet.) Then again, busting couldn’t be the whole explanation, because if it was then why were Phineas and Ferb themselves also more distant in this world?

I noticed Jeremy was staring at me, and decided that it was probably about time for a reply. “I _did_ want to talk to him” I said pensively. “About… a lot of things, some of them pertaining to our relationship.” There, that was vague enough. “But when the subject got to Isabella, I… I said some things without thinking and I really offended him. I tried to apologize, and I could see that he wasn’t really mad at me, just hurt, but he drove off nonetheless.” Which was par for the course for my and Phineas’ most intense fights, really. I got mad at him, while he was disappointed in and hurt by me, but he rarely ever raised his voice at me. It was one of the things which made it impossible for me to stay mad at him for long, and which meant that I often ended up deeply regretting our argument by the time the day was out.

Jeremy patted my shoulder, a mixture of what I think was resignation and understanding in his eyes. “That _is_ rough” he replied. “Do you mind me asking what exactly the argument was about, or is it something you don’t want to talk about?” I gave him a curt nod at the last bit, part of me yearning for someone to talk to about this whole mess but not feeling ready to spill the truth to Jeremy. “I see. Have you thought about what you’re going to do next? Are you going to try to make it up to him, or call Ferb instead, or…”

“I don’t know” I muttered. “I could probably do either. But calling Ferb for help sounds like taking the easy way out, even if he is over in Washington right now.” I noticed Jeremy give me a puzzled look, which I found strange because I was certain I remembered Phineas telling me about Ferb being married to vice-president Vanessa and living in the capital. Of course he might be just on a trip somewhere, but given the estranged bonds between this family I wouldn’t think Jeremy would expect me to know where my stepbrother was at all times. Then again, he was probably a well-known media figure... “What?” I asked him.

Jeremy shook his head. “It’s nothing” he finally said. “I just didn’t expect _you_ to be the one dismissing the easy solution.” Oops. “But you’re probably right, you should talk to Phineas. You two are siblings, after all, and I would hate to see you being openly at odds with one another for so long.”

I sighed. “I know, I know” I mumbled. “It’s just that – ” How could I explain how hard it would be for me to talk to Phineas if I couldn’t explain what the issue was we’d fought over? “Well, it’s complicated” I finally settled on. “Either of us is going to have to apologize, or we both have to, and I don’t know if I am ready for or convinced about apologizing for what I said, and I don’t even know if Phineas will want to accept my apology.”

“Well, you know Phineas” Jeremy replied. “You two might have drifted apart, but I don’t think he could be openly mad at you for long. If you apologize to him, I’m sure he’ll accept it. He might even feel compelled to apologize in turn.”

Jeremy was right, of course, and it was all the more incentive for me to go ahead and say the things I needed to say to my brother. “That’s true” I said. “But you were just arguing that he might carry a grudge against me from when we were kids. What changed?”

Jeremy chuckled. “Fair point. I guess the thing is that your relationship with your brothers, and especially the one you have with Phineas, is a multi-facetted and complicated one. On one hand, I believe Phineas couldn’t stay mad at you for long, but on the other, I do think that… well, a grudge might be the wrong word, but an entirely understandable lack of understanding from his side of why you did the things you did when you were young might contribute to why you’re no longer talking to each other as often as you used to. But a certain degree of separation from adult siblings is normal, and Phineas has got his own life to lead, as do you. From that point of view it’s natural that you’re not spending as much time with each other as you used to, even if there’s still room for improvement in your relationship.”

I gave him a look. “Basically, you’re using a lot of words to say that you don’t really know what’s going on either.”

My counterpart’s husband gave me a smile. “Perhaps. And perhaps that means that although I can argue and theorize as much as I want to, it’s going to have to be you two who actually talk this out, because you’re the ones involved in this. It’s your responsibility, Candace, and I’m sure that on some level you understand what’s going on between you and Phineas much better than I ever could.”

I thought about that for a few moments and then nodded. “You’re probably right,” I said, unable to keep the surprise that my counterpart’s husband, being out of the loop as he was, had said something which might actually help me along. “Thanks.”

Jeremy grinned. “That’s what husbands are for” he quipped, giving me a kiss on the cheek which didn’t feel as awkward as it did the last time. Perhaps that was because it was done by someone who had been an old acquaintance before, and whom I was now beginning to consider as a possible help and supporter. As a friend.

That thought suddenly made falling asleep next to him suddenly a lot more doable.

I slept relatively well that night, although from the way the blankets were placed when I woke up I must have tossed and turned a fair bit. Perhaps to compensate for the stress I’d gone through over the last day and night, I overslept – it was just past nine when I woke up, and Jeremy was already gone. And yet, I was still tired.

The fact that I woke up at the Johnson home rather than at my own house was one I was of course disappointed by, but I tried not to dwell on it. The talk with Jeremy last night had lifted my spirits a little and assured me that things weren’t that bad (yet), and I was determined to stay positive. I was going to get out of here one way or another, and I had something resembling a plan inside my head on how I was going to do that. And the first step in that scheme, apart from getting dressed and discovering Jeremy and the kids were already gone, was to call Ferb.

Like Phineas had said yesterday, it was easy to track down Ferb’s phone number. Actually calling him was a different matter. What was I going to say to him? Could I just tell him the truth, like I had with Phineas? Sure, Ferb was someone whom unlike Jeremy I’d actually been close to in my home world, but he still wasn’t Phineas, and although I knew Ferb would probably have the best reaction to the news of just about anyone (especially since he wasn’t the one who needed to be told that he was in a relationship with his sister) I still felt reluctant about spilling the beans when I didn’t have to. Perhaps that was the best approach to go at it. Tell the whole story, leave out the fact that Phineas and I were together, but tell him the full truth if he pressed the matter.

Which, as I realized just as I was making the call, undoubtedly meant that I _would_ have to spill the beans, because someone as perceptive as Ferb was would definitely pick up on the holes in my story.

I heard the phone ring, and eventually a familiar figure appeared on the other side. Ferb looked more or less the same as I remembered him from my own world, except for the fact that he was dressed more fancily. He somehow looked more British and more formal, too. Being married to the vice-president would probably do that to a person.

My stepbrother clearly hadn’t been expecting to see me, because he blinked _twice_. “Candace?”

“Hi” I said uneasily. “Ferb.”

He was quiet, as always, so I forged on ahead. “I need your help. You may be wondering why I am calling you now and why even if I needed to seek out one of my brothers I haven’t called Phineas instead, but there’s a perfectly logical explanation for that.” I hesitated. “Well, there’s an explanation. It’s probably not perfectly logical.”

Ferb gave me a bemused smile, which was enough to tell me I had caught his interest. Emboldened, I proceeded. “I’m not the Candace Flynn you know. Instead, I am a version of your sister from a different dimension. In my world, Phineas is still an inventor and he has been conducting tests on getting minds of interdimensional counterparts in touch with each other. I was supposed to be the first test subject, but when we tried it out two days ago I didn’t feel anything. But something must have happened anyway because I woke up in this world yesterday morning. I went to Phineas for help and he initially volunteered, but he and I had an argument about Isabella and he suggested that I should seek you out instead, so here I am.”

I watched for my brother’s reaction, and I was not disappointed. Ferb’s eyes widened slightly and he whistled appreciatively.

“I know, it’s quite a tale” I replied, feeling an odd sense of anxiety that I somehow hadn’t felt when dealing with Phineas. Perhaps it was because, despite everything, Phineas had been so familiar to me that my subconscious could simply not imagine that he’d react to my news in the way he had. Not that Ferb wasn’t familiar, of course, it was just… different. Phineas and I are intimate in a way that I can’t imagine ever being with Ferb, in _any_ dimension.

“It is” Ferb agreed, in a slightly lower baritone than I was used to from him. “And I would love to help you, Candace. But I’m afraid that Vanessa and my schedule is so full the next two weeks that I couldn’t do it to her to leave for Danville for a prolonged period of time.”

He scraped his throat, which usually was a signal that he’d said all he was going to, and I was left to ponder on his words, which were not unexpected but still a blow. “That means I’d have to make up with Phineas, then?”

Ferb nodded, but he raised an eyebrow in a curious way of which the meaning was clear as day to me – _I hadn’t even suggested that yet, Candace._

I didn’t reply immediately, but I didn’t feel like I had to, not from the way he was looking at me. Already, the cogs were turning in my brother’s sharp brain. Already, he was sensing that there was something more that I wasn’t telling him, something which explained why I was so preoccupied by the whole affair with Phineas and also what the row regarding Isabella was all about. Something which would tell him why I’d immediately accepted that I had to make up with Phineas rather than to try to flee into denial and stubbornness as my counterpart would no doubt have done if ensnared in a sibling spat with her brother, insisting that Ferb would have to put everything aside to come and help because she would _not_ face Phineas. I had been right about it earlier – he would figure out the truth, given enough time.

Usually, however, Ferb would have said something by now. Not much (he wouldn’t be Ferb if he’d said a lot) but just a few words indicating that he was onto me and that I couldn’t evade him finding out. This Ferb didn’t say anything, though, he just… stared. It was very unnerving.

“I’m a bit reluctant to talk to Phineas again… even though I know I have to, and I’d probably feel better afterwards” I eventually explained after about twenty seconds of Ferb staring unwaveringly at me. “He isn’t married to Isabella in our world, and he and I got into a discussion of why that could be, and in the process of the discussion I might have said some things about their relationship that hurt him.”

There. That covered all bases. It was the truth, evaded the main question but explained the matter very clearly, in my mind at least. Unfortunately Ferb disagreed. He stared at me and shook his head in bemused non-acceptance for a few moments, and then he clearly nodded in my direction. I think I got what he meant – what about _me_ in all this? _Why_ had I intervened against Phinbella in such a big way, when it didn’t involve me? For a moment, I wondered at which point in this dimension he had become such a good lie detector, and I wondered whether Phineas’ earlier talk about magic held some credence after all. How else would a person get to know to read people so well?

And then I remembered his wife was a politician, and it all made sense again.

I sighed. “You’re right. That’s not the _whole_ story. The thing of it is, well…” I searched his eyes for a moment, gauging his mood, and then added, “don’t freak out about this but in my world, Phineas and I are a couple?”

Ferb blinked, showing no other outwards sign of disturbance, but Isabella had told me that that was sometimes when his inner turmoil was at its fiercest. “That is creepy on so many levels.”

I sighed. “I know it’s… unusual, Ferb, and that it definitely sounds insane. But it happened in our world, and I could tell you lots of stories about how much I love Phineas and how I fell in love with him, but I’m a little tired of having to justify myself at every turn and that really isn’t the point right now.”

Ferb sighed, not meeting my eyes. “Candace, you realize all the reasons why this is a phenomenally bad idea, don’t you?”

“Of course!” I exclaimed. “Of course I realize all the reasons why this _could_ have been a bad idea, I think I voiced all of them myself when Phineas first said how he felt about me, but this wasn’t some overnight decision! Well, I guess if you want to get technical it _was_ an overnight decision, but I certainly put a good deal of thought into it, then and thereafter. We’ve been together for twenty-odd years now, we have kids, we… we’re happy!”

Ferb briefly raised an eyebrow, but his expression didn’t change. It was obvious that he was unconvinced.

“Look, I don’t know what else to say to convince you” I said in frustration. “I know why this sounds nuts, I know that on paper it’s a horrible idea, but I love Phineas and he loves me. He fought for this relationship, I f…” I frowned, noticing for the first time that Ferb was gradually shuffling away from the screen. “Ferb! Get back here!” I sighed. “I know, I know. I know what you’re thinking about me, but this is not the point, it’s about me and Isabella and what happened between us and whether and how we should solve that.”

Ferb gave me a ‘very well’ look, but his expression remained ominous. “Candace?” he said gently - probably too gently. “In the light of your discussion with my brother about his love for Isabella, how confident are you _really_ about your relationship with your world’s Phineas?”

Ferb had rarely been in the habit of sugarcoating things – he probably considered it to be a waste of words – so this bombshell hit right on target. I opened my mouth to immediately reply that his insinuations were ridiculous, that my Phineas certainly wasn’t interested in Isabella and never had been and that he was showing how misinformed he was about our world if he thought that, but…

… what if he had a point?

Not about the Isabella part, of course, because I could be completely confident about that not being an issue from the way those two interacted, but about how insecure I was about our relationship in general. I _had_ been awfully upset by discovering the truth of what had happened in this reality. And I had also been awfully ferocious in defending my choices after that. Of course part of that was natural, a logical reaction to how different things were here.

But I’m sure Phineas wouldn’t have done that.

So what if…

I’d taken a major decision twenty years ago. Of course a large part of why I took it was due to my love and affection for Phineas, which I’d always felt. But how large a part of me wanted to believe – was desperate to believe – that there had simply been no other choice? That it was destiny, fate, whatever you wanted to call it, that brought us together…

… and did that belief, so shaken by my arrival in this world, mean that I was desperate to find the flaws in the relationships in this world, even to the cost of antagonizing everyone? All just to prove that the incestuous relationship I had entered, the relationship that had brought me a lot but also cost me a lot, was still my best option and I shouldn’t doubt it… because deep in my heart, a small part of me was ready to do so?

I looked up at my stepbrother, and found out that for what had to be one of the few times in our relationships, I was the one who no longer had anything to say.


	11. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And the FLS one, which heavily features a character you might not have expected: Xavier Flynn! Because although this is Phineas and Candace's story, it wouldn't feel complete without featuring their kids as well. I hope they're coming across as well-rounded characters because it's been a while since I've had practice with original characters - particularly original characters with family ties to the main characters so some traits should spill over though not too many - and it's unexpectedly difficult. Not to mention that out of those two, I've mostly focused on Amanda until now.

**_ Chapter Ten _ **

Thursday, July 1st 2037  
10:15 AM    
Danville  
FLS-Verse

The second day in what I had come to dub as ‘The Incest Dimension’ in my mind started off relatively innocuously, as falling into a pattern was remarkably easy and tempting even in such a crazy world. I woke up at eight in the morning, had breakfast and had a brief conversation with my brother. Phineas had decided, apparently for my sake, to call my boss and tell him that I wouldn’t be going to work today (and since said boss was his own underling at Flynn-Fletcher Inc, it didn’t take much work to convince him – those are the benefits of nepotism, I suppose), apparently because I was sick. It was in part good news, as it meant that I could spend the day away from Phineas while he did his usual work and in-between tried to work on getting the machine ready to bring me home. The bad part, of course, was that I would be home alone all day.

I think being alone with my thoughts in my counterpart’s house wouldn’t have been too bad if my mind hadn’t been so preoccupied with the conversation I had overheard last night. I knew Phineas was having difficulty bringing me home, and whatever his motives for that were he was not soliciting any help. Not from Ferb, which was understandable to some extent because our stepbrother was on his crazy safari with his even crazier wife (well, Isabella isn’t crazy, it’s just crazy that he’s married to her. Just to make that clear) but also not from Baljeet, who was presumably right here in Danville. The thought that Phineas was passing up free help either out of pride or out of more sinister reasons drove me nuts, and I spent much of the morning in-between reading local Candace’s books and looking through her law papers – that was one thing that was good about this dimension, she was apparently bringing in a lot more money than I was at better job conditions – thinking of a way to circumvent the problem and get Phineas and Baljeet to work together on the project.

I had missed home from the moment I got here, of course, but it felt like every day was creating new reasons for me to miss it. Having Phineas around me all day yesterday when I knew what he was like in this dimension hadn’t been nice, but being alone this morning was probably even worse. I had nothing to do. Local Candace’s books were boring. Her papers were kinda interesting but in the end useless to me. And it all felt so empty. I wasn’t doing anything to get home, and I had no way of knowing for sure whether Phineas was. It just felt so… so purposeless. Everything was without purpose, and part of me feared that I was resigning myself to the fact that I wouldn’t be home tonight nor tomorrow night nor indeed for a long time.

Just as that thought was making me feel even worse, the telephone rang. A hologram filled the bulk of the room and I saw a picture of a woman I didn’t recognize, dressed somewhere between formal and casually. The word ‘School’ was printed in front of her face. A teacher or director, then, probably from the school downtown that Xavier and Amanda attended both in this world and in my world (where of course they were an entirely different Xavier and Amanda). I didn’t know who she was, which meant that perhaps she and my counterpart weren’t familiar either, but just from that I couldn’t decide whether to take the risk to answer the call. On the one hand, these weren’t my kids and I really didn’t want to deal with whatever she’d have to report about them, but on the other hand, it could be something important, and it would make me feel somewhat petty to not answer the call. _Too_ petty.

“Answer call?” I said tentatively, wondering whether I was making a mistake.

The woman flashed to life, giving me a warm but concerned expression that indicated she probably knew something bad about something that involved me. “Miss Flynn?”

While part of me wanted to reject that name as I hadn’t born it in years, the other part knew that in a world where my counterpart was never officially married, it was only logical that she’d go by her maiden name (almost everything made logical sense here, from a certain point of view. The only problem was that that particular point of view was seriously messed up.) “Yes?”

“Your son got in a scuffle today with some of his classmates” the teacher replied. “He got a serious blue eye as a result of that and a headache, and although he does not appear to have a concussion we did think it would be sensible to have him go home for the rest of the day. Would you mind coming over and picking him up?”

See, that is what you get from answering phone calls that aren’t intended for you – you get all sorts of duties foisted on you that shouldn’t be intended for you either, and you can’t turn them down anymore. I didn’t really care about my counterpart’s reputation, but letting word go round that she wouldn’t even tend to her hurt son was a step too far. “Of course” I replied grittily. “I’ll be there in a few minutes.”

I ended the call and headed over to the garage, taking the only remaining car there (which I guessed had to be my counterpart’s) and heading over to the school downtown. I couldn’t help but wonder what had happened between Xavier and his classmates. He hadn’t struck me as a particularly troublesome child in the few times I’d seen him, and if he was as much like his father as he appeared to be I couldn’t see him either bullying or being provoked by bullies either. Which left him just being beaten up, but I couldn’t quite see that happening to him either… but who knows, perhaps I was misjudging him. Maybe his character was completely different from how it had appeared to be at first sight.

It had to be his parentage. With offspring from a pairing so closely related, all genetic bets would be off.

I got to the school and soon made my way to the headmaster’s office, trying to evade other adults as much as possible. I had no desire to get into a conversation with people who knew my counterpart, and frankly I was feeling more than a little irritated at having to do this anyway. Perhaps I could break my promise to myself not to speak to Phineas’ clone son and tell him in no uncertain terms that he shouldn’t be making trouble (assuming he was, indeed, at least partly responsible for this). I would have the right to do so – I was supposed to be his mother, after all. He nor his father would be able to blame me for simply keeping up the charade.

Xavier was looking sufficiently guilty when I entered the office, and I gave him a stern, disapproving look before walking up to the woman who called earlier. “What happened?” I asked her.

“Your son got into an argument with two of his classmates during his lunch break” the teacher replied. “I wasn’t there, but you should know that some of the other kids who saw the incident testified that Xavier didn’t throw the first punch, but he did fight back. Gave one of the other kids a blue eye as well. Seeing that his friend was outnumbered, Karan Tjinder” I recognized the name as that of Baljeet’s oldest son, which was probably the case in both realities, “ran to my office and asked me to break them apart. I did, and seeing what had happened to the boys I figured that I should probably call you.”

“I see” I replied. “What have you done to the other kids?”

“I called their parents and gave them the same story” the teacher said. “You’re probably wondering whether the school has any disciplinary action lined up for them, but we can’t really do anything until we have a clear view of what happened, and neither of the kids seems to be willing to tell us anything. We’ll have to put what little they’ve told us next to each other, discuss it this afternoon and talk to them about it tomorrow. Maybe a good night’s sleep will make them more aware of what they’ve done and more inclined to tell us what really happened.”

“Maybe” I agreed, hardly being all right with the teacher’s words but nodding my consent anyway to get Xavier out of there faster. I gave the woman my polite greetings and left for the car, this time accompanied by my counterpart’s son. The boy was quiet and brooding, which was fine by me at first because I didn’t want to say anything to him, but after a while my natural curiosity got too strong. “What happened?” I asked.

Xavier eyed me oddly. “Do you really want to know that?” he said skeptically. “You’re not my mom, and you’re going to be leaving us soon anyway…”

“Thanks to whatever happened to you, I had to either come over and pick you up or have to ask your father to do it, or else your school would have thought your mother to be a neglecting parent – and I wasn’t going to do that to her reputation” I replied wryly. “So the least you can do is tell me what you got up to back there. If it’s really terrible, rest assured that you won’t have to deal with judging looks from me for long because I’m going to be gone from this world very soon anyway.” Or so I hoped.

Xavier looked up at me. “Promise me you won’t tell Dad?” he asked, almost pleadingly. “Or the teachers? Or Uncle Ferb, or Aunt Isabella, or Mandy, or…”

“I won’t tell anyone unless you allow me to” I interrupted him. “Is that what you need to hear? Jeesh, kid, I’m just an interdimensional counterpart of your mother, not a genie looking for a loophole.”

Xavier chuckled. “Well, if there is one thing genie stories taught me, it’s that you can never be too careful” he quipped. “As for my own story…” He suddenly looked downcast, putting a hand over his wounded eye. “Well, this actually began a while back. For a while now, I’ve never really been able to deal with the fact that Phineas Flynn is my father – well, my uncle as far as they know, but since I look so much like him everyone compares me to him anyway –  in the right way at school. If I’m successful at science or math or any other subject, bullies call me a nerd and a showoff. If I’m not successful, everyone taunts me about how my uncle must be so disappointed in me. And I know that they’re lying and that he isn’t, but it still stings that I can’t do the same things Dad can do. I don’t have the smarts, I don’t have the touch, I don’t have the nerve for any of the things Dad and uncle Ferb used to be able to do just like that.”

I bit my lip, something about the story touching a familiar nerve inside me. “So, you’ve been bullied over it?” I replied, getting into the car after thoughtlessly opening the door for my counterpart’s son. “Haven’t you told your parents about that?”

Xavier shrugged. “On occasion, yes, but it’s not really as big a deal as you think it might be. I can usually handle myself around the other kids, and no one has ever forced me into anything like doing their homework or carrying their bags. I just ignore them and as a result all they can do is annoy me. They’re just jealous of Dad anyway. And it’s not like they’re strong or bold enough to really beat me up.”

I nodded pensively, something about the story rubbing me the wrong way, which of course meant that I’d try to avoid that subject at all costs and focus on the other parts. “But you got that black eye anyway.”

“I have to admit that that’s partly my fault” Xavier replied. “You see, a few weeks ago Roy and Nick – they’re pretty much the main school bullies, and they can’t stand me for some reason – sabotaged my science fair project. I managed to get it up and running back in time, but I was still mad as I knew who’d done it but I couldn’t prove it. I wanted to get over it and settle into ordinary life again, but every time I saw those guys I remembered what they did and got angry again. Eventually, I decided to take a page out of your book and try to bust them.”

I couldn’t help but smirk at the familiarity as I activated the car and drove off the parking lot, in the direction of what was in this dimension the Flynn family home. “What did you do?”

“I modified a cloth rack opposite my locker to include a hidden camera, unnoticeable and irremovable by the casual observer” Xavier told me. “Then in the following days, I never locked my locker but always left the door slightly ajar. Given the propensity of those two for petty crimes, I was sure that they would take my school books and vandalize them by scribbling lewd images all over the text, or they could steal the autographed biography of Einstein – it would be just a worthless copy, but they wouldn’t realize that. They’ve done that kind of stuff before, so…”

“Wait a second” I interrupted him. “Your _autographed_ biography of Einstein?”

Xavier gave me a look as if I really shouldn’t be asking this question. “Time travel.”

I rolled my eyes. “Of course. That would be the logical explanation.”

I’m not sure whether Xavier caught onto my sarcasm – it would really show he took after his father if he didn’t – but he proceeded either way. “After I got the footage, I’d be able to hack into the local television network and display it there, and Roy and Nick would be busted without having any proof that I was the one who spied on them. I know it’s ethically kinda messed-up, and it probably wouldn’t even have the kind of consequences for them that they had coming after sabotaging my invention, but it would at least get them into _some_ trouble, you know?”

“Oh, I know” I muttered to myself. “So what happened to mess up your plan? Because I’m sure none of that included you being beaten up.”

Xavier shook his head. “Like I said, they weren’t even supposed to find out that it was me who snitched on them” he replied. “But I got too excited. I saw my locker had been messed with right away when I came to school this morning, and I just had to know whether I had managed to catch them on tape. This morning I excused myself during second class under the guise of a bathroom break and went off to loosen the camera and check its footage. Unfortunately, though, Dana Lewis – she’s two years older than I am, and she’s got a crush on Roy – spotted me looking at the camera and surprised me. She took the camera from me because she thought I was just spying on everyone, and she threatened to go to a teacher and tell them that, knowing that I’d be the only one they would suspect of being capable of putting something like that together. Well, there’s also Fred, but Fred’s off for the jungle trip this week and he wouldn’t do that anyway. I had to give up the camera and tried to follow Dana between classes to get it back and I eventually succeeded when she wasn’t looking, but during lunch break Roy and Nick cornered me. Apparently Dana had managed to show them the footage before I got the camera back, and they were furious with me. They shoved me against a wall, I defended myself, we got into a fight and… well, you know the rest. Obviously I couldn’t tell any of that to the teachers or I could end up in as much trouble as they were for spying on people.”

I frowned. “You still told _me_ , though.”

Xavier nodded. “Yeah, but that’s different. Your counterpart understands me, and if I’m not mistaken you probably do, too.”

Did I? It hadn’t really occurred to me before, but reflecting on Xavier’s story I realized that he was right. Setting up a trap for busting bullies by dubious means was very un-Phineaslike (well, apart from the creation of the camera itself, and I suppose he could’ve hacked into a TV channel if he really wanted to) but it was something I could have easily seen myself doing when I was around Xavier’s age (again, without making my own camera. I probably would have asked Phineas and Ferb to do it, though, and they would most likely have cooperated even if they might not have approved of me doing something so petty.) I looked at the boy sitting next to me, for the first time trying to forget the fact that he was the result of incest and looked like Phineas in every way. Maybe there was more to him than I had thought at first glance.

And maybe we were more alike than we looked, too.

“I do understand” I replied, noticing the way he was staring at me expectantly and wishing once more that his real mother was here to deal with this. “But as understandable as your actions were, you shouldn’t have done that. There might have been another opportunity on which you could bust those guys. Recording them meant you might have gotten in trouble even if your plan had gone through. You may have only intended to film those two miscreants, but you were essentially spying on everyone else too by doing that. Not to mention hacking into the TV system.”

Xavier looked sheepish. “That was only to get my film to a wider audience without anyone finding out I was behind it – I mean, I was going to be the first one under suspicion, so I needed to make sure no one could prove it. And I was still trying to come up with alternatives for that when Dana confronted me.”

I nodded. “Still, that doesn’t change that you spied on people. I doubt your teachers would have approved of that, nor would your real mother.”

Xavier frowned. “So you never did anything like this – think up something that would affect others as well – when trying to bust Dad and Uncle Ferb?”

I froze up. “No, I didn’t” I replied. “They might have driven me to insanity sometimes with their stupid projects, but I always kept myself under control when trying to bust them.”

Xavier shook his head. “I can tell you’re lying, Aunt Candace.”

I had been hoping desperately that he had Phineas’ obliviousness, but of _course_ that particular trait hadn’t been passed on to his son either. Xavier was staring firmly at me, almost scrutinizing me, and I felt so uncomfortable that my hands clenched around the steering wheel. Fortunately we were getting close to my counterpart’s home – I wouldn’t stand this conversation for any longer than I had to.

“ _Aunt_ Candace?” I asked him.

“Well, you’re not really my mother, and you are a version of my Dad’s sister” Xavier pointed out. “Calling you Mom would be weird, so ‘Aunt Candace’ it is.” He looked out of the window and hummed a few notes of the soundtrack of a TV show I’d vaguely heard of before casually turning back to me. “You know, did Grandma ever get angry at you for trying to snitch on Dad and Uncle Ferb? I mean, you were effectively just trying to get them in trouble.”

“I – of course not!” I stammered. Busting was a matter I hadn’t really thought about for years, but as I had found out only a day ago the urge was still there, as was the conviction that I had at least been somewhat in the right when trying to bust my brothers. “I was trying to protect them, after all. Their inventions might have been annoying and I did want to teach Phineas and Ferb a lesson for what they did to me, but their ideas were also dangerous and impossible and destructive and… and…”

“…and beyond your grasp to make?” Xavier suggested. “Is that why you couldn’t stand them doing that, because Dad and uncle Ferb could make those inventions and you couldn’t?”

I stared at him. “…you know, your mother really ought to teach you some respect for your elders.”

Xavier smiled and shook his head. “Oh, that’s nothing. Wait until you have a good conversation with Amanda. She’s the fiercer one between the two of us.”

“I can’t wait” I replied deadpan. “But no, I wasn’t jealous of my brothers. Why would I want to be able to build all those stupid things? I was a teenager, not a kid anymore, and I could see they were useless and dangerous. I did resent the fact that they got much more attention than I got, but that’s an entirely different thing.”

“I see” Xavier mused. “Then why did Mom always tell me that even in the early stages, long before she’d come to terms with what Dad and uncle Ferb were doing, she occasionally joined them? That would be a little strange if she thought they presented a legitimate threat, and I doubt your dimension and your own personality are so different that that never happened at all.”

I kept my eyes firmly focused on the wheel. “How do you know all these things?”

“Mom told me” Xavier replied. “I’m a huge fan of the Back to the Future movies and wanted to know about how my parents got together so that I would know what to do if I messed it up. I was expecting to have to use that information to argue with a younger version of you, though.” The implication that now he was trying to argue to convince _me_ about the wonderful way things had happened in this world was crystal clear.

I gritted my teeth and looked straight ahead. What did Xavier even know about my life? Nothing. Absolutely nothing. He couldn’t tell me how to live my life or how to deal with Phineas, he was just a kid and one who had been doing some of the same things himself, busting-wise. He had no right to argue with me.

I felt a hand on my shoulder and turned sideways to see my counterpart’s son, who actually looked apologetic. “I’m sorry, Aunt Candace” he said softly. “I went a little too far there. I… I’m just trying to help you. Jealousy born out of insecurity can be bad for the target, but it’s no fun for the person having those feelings either. I know how you feel there.”

I frowned at him. “Do you?” Certainly, we’d just discovered a few similarities between the two of us, but the thought that he could actually help with some of my longstanding issues felt like going too far.

Xavier nodded. “I do. I think both you and I have always felt a need to live up to our relatives and be as cool and capable and well-liked as Dad and Uncle Ferb. Mom and Dad talked about that and Mom doesn’t have that feeling anymore, but it wouldn’t surprise me if you still did.”

I froze and shook my head in what I had to admit was a rather rigid way. His statement surprised me, and I felt – well, I don’t have to say what I felt. It’s not important. “You don’t know what you’re talking about, kid” I replied. “And even if, hypothetically, I had issues like that, shouldn’t I be talking to your Mom or your Dad about it and not you, especially if you still have them as well as you just said? Not to mention that I don’t have to live up to my brothers’ successes – they may be more well-liked than I am and better at doing crazy stuff, but I’m a successful professional lawyer. That is nothing to sneeze at.”

“You’re right” Xavier said. “But if I’m wrong here, why are you staring at me that way and talking so defensively?” He patted my back. “I know the thought must distress you but I’m only trying to _help_ , Aunt Candace. At least talk to your world’s version of Dad about it. I get the feeling that you and Dad missed out on a lot of good talks because you’re not together there.”

Well, that took the ridiculousness of it all to a new level. “Are you seriously suggesting that I and my family relationships are _worse off_ because I’m not committing incest with my brother?!” I exclaimed.

Xavier held up his hands. “I didn’t say that, and I didn’t mean to say that. I know hearing that Dad and your other self are together must disturb you. I was upset myself when I heard it for the first time. Couldn’t properly talk to Mom and Dad again for two weeks. It was Amanda who finally snapped me out of it by telling me that I was too young to move out of the house, so if I was going to be living here for the next years I had to be able to talk to them again.”

I frowned. “You were disturbed by Phineas and Other Candace being together? But you’re, like, a physical copy of Phineas. The fact that he is your father can’t have come as a surprise.”

Xavier shrugged. “Maybe that’s part of why it bugged me so much, because I _should_ have known. I mean, I want to be a scientist one day, and yet I could look in the mirror and basically see Dad’s face without putting two and two together! And now I felt forced to live up to him in a wholly different way than when he had just been my uncle Phineas…” He shook his head. “But I certainly felt upset on a moral level as well. Unlike Amanda or even Uncle Ferb’s kids, I still don’t quite approve of them being together. They’re clearly in love, and without them being a couple I guess I wouldn’t exist the way I do now, but that doesn’t stop me from being disturbed, probably more so than a normal child would be around his parents, when I have to go to the bathroom upstairs at night and hear… well, you get the picture. I can deal with it on a practical and theoretical level, but it’s never felt completely right to me on an emotional level.”

“That must put you at odds with your family a lot” I speculated.

“Not as much as you might think” Xavier replied. “Mom understands how I feel, Amanda gets to a certain extent where I’m coming from, and Dad… well, he was upset about it for the first few years – he tried not to show it, but he has his tells – until I first started dating Angie. I don’t know if you’ve heard her name yet, but she’s Uncle Ferb’s eldest daughter.”

I suddenly stared at him very differently. “You’re dating your cousin?” One too close relationship within the family was one thing, but to have there be two…

“Step-cousin” Xavier immediately corrected. “Not that there’s anything wrong with cousins dating per se, but I agree it would have been unusual. I’ve never felt that there was anything wrong with me dating Angie besides me being too much of a dork for her, and no one else in the family raised an eyebrow – although that might just be because Angie had been having a crush on me for a few months so everyone had seen it coming. My point is that ironic as it may sound, Dad was the only one who was uncomfortable with it. He never told me not to date her, but I could tell he was struggling with the fact that I was going out with Uncle Ferb’s daughter, because Ferb was so close to him that they were basically two sides of the same coin, and seeing his son date his brother’s daughter made him feel almost like he was dating Ferb and it felt really odd. We had a long talk about it one night and I told him that although I could understand where he was coming from, he had to see that although he and Uncle Ferb felt like brothers to one another, that didn’t mean Angie and I did. Blood may not always be thicker than water, but water is flexible and it is what you make of it. To Dad and Uncle Ferb, the fact that they weren’t biologically related didn’t matter in them considering each other brothers and I would never want to detract from their relationship, but I told him that their non-blood relationship didn’t mean Angie and I had to feel like cousins. I think that was the first time he started to really understand why people had felt disturbed at his own relationship with Mom, and it’s helped him a lot in that regard and made his discussions with Mom about the need to keep what they have a secret a lot easier.” He gave me a meaningful look. “A lot of conversations are improved if people just try to understand or at least accept each other, even if they don’t and might never agree with the other person’s position.”

I nodded half-heartedly, my mind going over the points he had made despite my efforts to remain detached. “I… see” I replied simply, not wanting to disclose too much about my own feelings. “Well, that was a very good conversation, Xavier. I’ll try to think about what you’ve said.”

Xavier frowned. “Wait, that’s it? You’re not going to… I mean…”

“We’re at your home” I replied. “You probably have some homework to do, and I have some things to take care of myself. Not to mention that you need to get something for that black eye of yours.”

“Actually, that’s Uncle Ferb and Aunt Isabella’s home” Xavier said dryly. “Our home is next door.”

“Wait, what?” I called out, looking up. “Ferb and Isabella live right next to you?” Sure enough, the two houses were remarkably alike. It was no wonder I’d just mistaken one for the other.

“Well, of course, where else would they live?” Xavier sighed. “You know, if you even have to ask why Mom and Dad and Uncle Ferb would choose to live next to each other, you really don’t understand them at all.”

“And maybe I don’t want to understand them” I snapped back, getting out of the car and stalking towards the front door. “I don’t have to have anything to do with them, nor with my own brothers. I grew up, Xavier. I guess you don’t understand that, but family isn’t everything. I’m my own woman now, and I certainly don’t need to depend on them for my happiness.”

Xavier stared at me, having followed me to the door. Without saying a word he took the house key out of his pocket and let us inside. I watched him as he walked towards his room but then hesitated and turned around again, looking at me. “If that’s really how you feel, Aunt Candace, then I wonder what in the world you’re still doing here.”

Before I could come up with a rebuttal to that he was gone, leaving me to stare after him. I blinked and turned to the living room, a scowl on my face. I started searching for Local Candace’s cell phone, which I eventually found in a drawer.

After looking through a modern phone number directory on the internet and getting distracted by my counterpart’s Google searches on the way while also looking for some names I was interested in, I finally got around to calling the Tjinder household. I knew Phineas wouldn’t like it, but I didn’t have to do what Phineas told me to and this was an emergency anyway. I needed to get home as soon as possible.

This reality made me _think_ far too much.


	12. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A new chapter, in which Candace sets out to help people and tries to reconcile with her other-dimensional brother, and that's all that happens because she definitely doesn't have issues that need to be resolved. Don't be silly.

**_ Chapter Eleven _ **

Thursday, July 1st 2037  
10:15 AM    
Danville  
AYA-Verse

Ferb was waiting for my answer.

I was remaining silent.

We stared at each other, knowing that deep down, we might never quite be able to grasp the other’s views. This Ferb lived in a world in which Phinbella had happened. Our Ferb had been reluctant to accept that Phineas and I were a thing from the start, so it was only natural that this Ferb would be even slower to do so. He was set in his ways here, which meant that he was naturally predisposed against our relationship and was coming up with arguments that only made sense to him, and…

Oh, who was I kidding.

I didn’t want to believe Ferb could ever be right on some level, but he could be. He might be from a different dimension but he was still Ferb, and as long as I’d known my brother he was almost always right (though modest enough to deny it when either Phineas, Isabella or I pointed it out). And if he was… well, I didn’t even want to consider that.

Although part of me just wanted to remain silent and figure this out for myself, the other part knew that only through talking could I ever come up with a way to justify my behavior and make me feel good about all this again. I had to say something to Ferb, or else he would only think that he was right, and he couldn’t be, because I had to be right, and…

Seriously, how was Phineas able to stand my constant nervous rambling? It was getting on my own nerves now, and that was absurd because I was the one doing it!

“I-” I began, and then I instantly hesitated, my nervousness giving me away. “I was just worried about whether my and Phineas’ counterparts are happy in their relationships. I don’t need to know whether or not romantic relationships between Phineas and Isabella or me and Jeremy are failures here as much as they would have been in our world if I want to justify me and Phineas being together. I don’t need that self-validation, Ferb.”

Ferb frowned. “But you would still like it, wouldn’t you?”

“I… I…” I hesitated even more now, but I managed to recompose myself. “You know what? I would. Of course I would, who wouldn’t? But it doesn’t mean everything to me. If it would, can you explain to me why I have been focused on looking for the flaws in Phineas’ relationship in this world, rather than for those in mine?”

For the first time in the conversation, I was pretty sure that Ferb was caught off-guard. I folded my arms. “Well?”

Ferb remained silent for twenty seconds, pondering it over, and then he gave me a smirk and a conceding nod. Or at least, that was what I think it was. Whatever, it was close enough anyway.

“I’ll contact Phineas” I said. “And I’ll think about what you said, because you made your point. But that’s not all there is for me. I know what Phineas and I have is true. But I’m not so sure whether the same applies to the romantic affairs going on in this world.” I gave him a final nod, and cut off the conversation.

I stood up, feeling dazed, and walked over the television. I put it on and started watching mindless reality TV, because I’d take anything to take my mind off the discussion with Ferb. It probably would have worked if not for the fact that the kids came home at twelve o’clock that day, and I’d just only spent two hours in front of the television and watched a few shows until the home was disturbed by the sound of children’s voices.

It was the first time I had been forced to deal with my counterpart’s kids alone, and I didn’t know what to do. Fortunately, Xavier and Fred seemed to be self-reliant and unperceptive. Rather more unfortunately, Amanda wasn’t. She kept staring at me for the latter half of our lunch, and it drove me mad because I couldn’t figure out in what way I wasn’t acting like her mother as long as I didn’t know what kind of person her mother truly was. Finally the boys headed outside to sit beneath the tree or something, and Amanda cornered me while I was doing the dishes. “Is something wrong, Mom?”

I shrugged, not wanting another person embroiled in this mess. “What do you mean?”

Amanda stared directly at me. “Oh, come on. You look distracted, you act distracted, you even sound distracted. You’ve been with your head in the clouds and saying unusual things all day and yesterday, and there’s got to be a reason.”

Well, that gave me either the choice to accept her verdict and try to work around it, or deny it. Naturally I chose the second option. “There’s nothing going on with me, Amanda. I’m just a little tired and stressed, that’s everything.”

‘My’ daughter nodded thoughtfully, with a look on her face that told me she wasn’t buying it at all. “I heard you and Dad talking yesterday evening about your visit to uncle Phineas” she said carefully. “Did the two of you get into an argument?”

I sighed. “In a manner of speaking.”

“So is that a no, or a yes?”

Perhaps Amanda had the perceptiveness genes which were meant for her brothers (which wasn’t exactly surprising, since the Amanda I knew had always struck me as being the more perceptive one of the kids as well… although that could be less her catching on quickly than it was Xavier being in denial about things.)

“That is a yes,” I replied, and I didn’t say anything more than that, which of course left Amanda wondering whether to ask what said argument was actually about. I guessed she wouldn’t be able to summon the nerve to directly ask that and was proven right, but when one can’t go straight to a destination one can always go around and that was what Amanda tried to do here. “That’s really sad, Mom” she said, carrying even a little emotion in her voice. “But you’ve gotten into arguments with Uncle Phineas before – why exactly are you so upset about what he and you said to each other now?”

“That’s none of your business” I said, in a way I believed my counterpart might as well have done. In fact, it was probably more faithful to my counterpart than to me because I had only said it for two seconds before I started wondering whether I hadn’t put that a little too unkindly, while Amanda just took it in stride. “Let’s just say that something I said accidentally hurt him, and he didn’t want to speak to me anymore thereafter.”

Amanda frowned. “Uncle Phineas didn’t want to talk to you anymore? You must have _really_ upset him.”

I had to smile melancholically at that, smiling at the fact that this was true in both of our worlds but still upset about and blaming myself for the fact that it had happened. “I must have. I talked to your Dad and to your Uncle Ferb,” that combination sounded so comfortable that I had to remind myself that the first name wasn’t referring to Phineas, “about it and they both suggested that I should talk to him again. Either that, or he’ll come to me by himself, but since I said the things that hurt him it really wouldn’t be fair for him to seek me out first, would it?”

“That depends on why you said those things in the first place” Amanda astutely replied. “But don’t worry, Mom. I’m sure you and Uncle Phineas will be able to make up. He could never stay mad at you for long.”

Couldn’t he? I knew that was true in my own world, but here I had been doubting it. “That explains why our relationship is so messed up here then” I said under my breath both sarcastically and cynically.

Amanda looked up at me, having overheard that part against my wishes, and shrugged. “It’s not like my relationship with Xavier and Fred is perfect.”

And thus we abruptly sailed off into unfamiliar waters, waters which local Candace would be expected to maneuver through easily. I didn’t want to risk revealing how little I knew about them, but for that same reason I wanted to find out more – after all, who knew how long I’d be stuck here now that Phineas and I were at odds. I was hoping we would be able to reconcile, but I couldn’t count on it. “You’re right” I bluffed. “How has that whole thing been going for the past days, anyway?” I hoped that would work – it might be a little oddly phrased, but it would give me the results I wanted without anyone instantly suspecting I knew next to nothing about these kids at all. And I knew from the dinner table conversation earlier that _something_ was going on.

Amanda looked up at me with a weird look, but that was all she gave me, so maybe I had just about managed to dodge a bullet there. “I don’t know what I should say about it anymore. I’ve been trying to accept that, you know, they are who they are and they do the things they like to do and I can’t change them, but… I mean, just look at them!” She pointed out through the window. Xavier was looking up at the clouds and Fred was flipping through the pages of a book. “Average kids do nothing by video gaming and looking up stuff they’re into on a computer – Xavier and Fred actually get out of the house and into nature, and subsequently they still don’t do anything! And they’re not exactly what you would call average kids!”

“So… what exactly would you want them to do?” I said, placing a hand on my daughter’s shoulder in an attempt to show comfort.

Amanda shrugged. “I don’t know, just… something. Anything. I love those boneheads, but they never put effort into anything. I mean, Uncle Phineas and Ferb were brilliant enough to be able to invent something and rest on their laurels their whole lives, but they didn’t! They made the most of summer when they were young, and now that they’ve grown up, they’ve got steady jobs which they spend a lot of time on and they actually manage to do amazing things. It’s… it’s just so unfair to anyone who can’t just pull magic out of a hat and make stuff work. Xavier and Fred have talent and they can use it for the greater good or even just to enjoy themselves, but they won’t do it! I mean, you understand, don’t you Mom? You always used to bust Uncle Phineas and Uncle Ferb for the same reasons.”

That was one question I could give an answer to. “Actually if anything, I’d say I tried to bust your uncles for the opposite reason” I replied. “They were entirely _too_ active for my tastes. I was wrong of course, because I was petty enough to believe they were just out to annoy me when all they were doing was trying to have fun. But yes, you’re right that the fact that I was envious that I couldn’t do any of that played a role. Of course, it was there that I was even more wrong.”

Amanda gave me a very confused look, and I suddenly wondered whether all those things that were so clear to me now had ever become clear to my counterpart, and if they had, if she’d ever dared to admit them to her kids. I supposed it was natural that they would know a little less of the whole ordeal than my kids did, given the fact that I was with Jeremy rather than Phineas here and thus the kids were not only less invested in the relationship between me and my brother, but I would also have an easier time telling them only my side of the equation. And come to think of it, a lot of the realizations I’d come to about what I was doing wrong by busting had only emerged _because_ of my relationship with Phineas, hadn’t they? Was it possible that my counterpart had never truly given up on busting the boys, even now that she was far too old for any of that?

I looked at Amanda, wondering whether the difference I suspected in my counterpart’s mentality around siblings and relationships would have had a negative effect on their upbringing, and how much I could steer them back on the right course now. She just kept staring at me, like Ferb would, and I suddenly realized that that was because she’d asked me a question. “I’m sorry, what did you say?”

“I asked you whether your story about how you were wrong to bust means that you think I’m making a fool of myself doing this” Amanda repeated. “I mean, I know I can get a little too upset sometimes, but I’m doing this for their own good! Can’t they see that?”

I patted my counterpart’s daughter on the back. “Perhaps they can’t” I agreed. “Have you talked to your uncles about this? If anyone could convince Xavier and Fred that making the most of summer is worth it, it’s them.”

“I’ve talked to Uncle Phineas about it once” Amanda said, sighing. “It was a long time ago – probably over a year or two. I think he said something like that they should be able to determine their own future, and that it was sad that they weren’t inventing stuff but that I shouldn’t get too upset about it, and that if Xavier and Fred wanted to relax now that they still could, I should let them.”

I frowned. That both sounded like Phineas and didn’t, even taking into the equation the fact that this was a second-hand account of a conversation Amanda had a long time ago. He _would_ probably have encouraged his nephews to follow their own paths, but I couldn’t imagine him not trying to convince others about the joys of summer. Even I felt passionate about that now after living with him for so many years, and for my boyfriend summer fun had felt like his _raison d’être_ for so long that I couldn’t imagine him ever dropping it fully.

Whether that also applied to his local counterpart, though, I wasn’t so sure.

“Well, maybe I can help you,” I replied, an idea popping into my head. “Back in the day, I’ve.. tinkered with some stuff on those occasions when I was actually working with rather than against my brothers.” Probably more often than your real mother would have. “I think I could come up with some ideas that could even get those two inspired to invent something.”

The overjoyed expression in Amanda’s eyes made me smile. “That would be awesome” she replied. “It would be great to see them actually get a hobby. Maybe I could even help you along.”

“That’s what I’m expecting you to do” I said, grinning. “Let’s start with the basis that you have. Have you made any suggestions to your brothers yet?”

As it turned out, she had, and it was quite the extensive list too. (And when I say list, I mean she had it all written down already, which reminded me of my own nerdy side.) Skimming through the ideas, I soon found their common denominator – they simply weren’t ambitious enough. Apparently Amanda really hadn’t been in contact with the full extent of her uncles’ preteen greatness and had no idea just what we got up to as kids. When I told her stories about the rollercoaster, the time machine, the tree houses and the air plane we used to fly around the world, just to name a few examples, I practically blew her mind. She instantly agreed with me that this was the kind of thing we needed.

It was hard to come up with something original, because Phineas and Ferb had pretty much exhausted every impossibility there was back in the day. I could just borrow one of their ideas and give that to Xavier and Fred, but that didn’t quite feel right. I wanted to come up with an original idea, one that I couldn’t recall my brothers using a zillion times.

In order to come up with a suitable idea, I had to slip into my brothers’ mindset, which was easier than it sounds because I’ve done that a lot of times over the years now, trying to really understand Phineas and what drove him beyond the narrow impression of him I had when I was younger. What should we suggest to the boys? Something active. A sport, perhaps. The thought of swimming came to mind, but that seemed too simple and I wasn’t sure whether Jeremy would appreciate a giant water party in the backyard.

Perhaps we could come up with our own sport? Combining some of them, like taking soccer and bicycle racing and turning them into a bicycle-soccer thing? Perhaps we could even tinker with gravity a little… I groaned as the memory of jetpack volleyball popped into my mind. So much for pure originality.

Maybe we were going at this the wrong way, though? Maybe instead of coming up with ideas for the boys we should allow them the opportunity to make their own plans. But that would just put us back to square one: how to motivate Xavier and Fred to actually do something. I sighed. What would Phineas do…

I hadn’t been with him for twenty years for nothing. I knew what Phineas would do. He would go up to the boys and talk to them and motivate them straight out of the funk they were in. Why had I not considered this sooner? I took the list and my own thoughts and headed outside, a curious Amanda following me.

“Hi, Xavier, Fred” I said cheerfully. “What are you guys doing?”

Xavier looked at me and Amanda, and then at his brother. “Nothing” he said, shrugging. “What should we be doing?”

“How about building something to get some exercise?” I suggested. “Back in the day your uncles used to experiment will all kinds of other forms of activities, like hockey Z-9 and jetpack volleyball. Why don’t you try to figure out if you can come up with a new sport form, or something like that?”

My counterpart’s son shrugged. “But if Uncle Phineas and Ferb already did something similar, why should we be doing it again?”

I chuckled and knelt down to his level, putting a hand on the shoulders of both kids. “Boys, boys” I said with a smile. “It doesn’t matter if it’s been done before. Yes, originality and creativity is nice, but if you’re able to enjoy yourself doing something that others have done to death, why should that little detail stop you? The ideas you come up with aren’t the only things that matter when it comes to having fun. What matters is what you _do_ with them. Besides, inventing a new sport form might also help you put that wood-and-steel fusing tool you’re holding into good use, Fred.”

Fred examined the tool as if this was the first time he saw it. He looked over at Xavier and smiled. Xavier smiled as well. “I guess that’s not a bad idea” he said. “Hey, Fred, do you want to play jetpack hockey?”

Huh. That was curious. Well, like mother, like son I suppose. Even if he wasn’t _my_ son.

“Jetpack hockey?” Amanda said, frowning and putting her arms over each other.

“Yup! Hockey with floating goals and _non_ -floating pucks. And maybe some more quirks attached to make it even more interesting.” Xavier grinned at his sister. “Are you joining us?”

“Um…” Amanda stammered. “Sure? Why not?”

“Great! We’ll be back here in a flash, we just need to pick up a few supplies first. Come on, Freddo!” The two brothers walked off, and I noticed Amanda staring at me with something that looked like a cross between wonder and adoration in her eyes.

I smirked and ruffled my daughter’s hair. “Don’t get too excited, Amanda” I warned her. “We’re not there yet.”

We weren’t, and the construction of the plans turned out to be the more important part, but in the end it was shockingly easy to get the boys to work together and actually create something. I had to admit that even though I wasn’t their real mother, I felt proud of them. I even joined them for a game, and although part of me felt guilty for taking the time to do this when I had no idea what was happening to my real children and to Phineas, in the thrill of the occasion all that was forgotten. I liked these kids, I liked playing with them, and my mind was entirely on the game when I finally disengaged my jetpack and got down to the ground again, only to be faced by a slightly amused Phineas staring at me. “Hey, Candace.”

“Hi… Phineas…” I stammered, not knowing what to say at my brother’s abrupt appearance. On one hand, I wanted to apologize, but on the other, I still wasn’t convinced that everything I’d said was actually wrong. “Um, are you still here?” Stupid! That was probably the worst thing to say, now he’d think I didn’t want him to come to me. “I mean, you were planning to leave on a business trip before I asked for your help, weren’t you?”

“I was” Phineas replied, looking at the jetpack hockey with obvious fascination (and was that wistfulness?) before he tore his eyes away from it and gave me a sad smile. “But I figured that I couldn’t leave until I solved this problem. _Our_ problem. Candace, I’m… I’m sorry I yelled at you. I shouldn’t have lost my temper.”

He was so incredibly… well, Phineas. Apologizing for something even when he was entirely in the right, and clearly being afraid that he’d hurt me when I had been the one to do the lashing out at him in the first place. “Phineas…” I began, walking away from the kids so we could talk in private, “I’m so sorry for what I said. I went too far. I shouldn’t have questioned your decisions like that. You were right, you hadn’t argued that I should be with Jeremy or that my Phineas should be with Isabella, so I had no right to suggest that you and my counterpart should be… together.”

Phineas didn’t immediately answer, and when he did it wasn’t in direct reply to what I’d said. “It took me a while for your words to really sink in” he said softly. “The thought of being with you in that way was so alien to me that your suggestions that I made the wrong choice stung more than they otherwise would have.”

“I understand” I replied and, feeling the urge to be open and knowing he wouldn’t talk bad about me for it, I added: “I think part of me felt the same way.”

“The thought of being with Jeremy was alien to you?” Phineas said, confused. “I thought you two dated in your world as well… although maybe you never said that. I must have just assumed it.”

“No, we were indeed together for two years” I admitted. “But I was talking about something different, and it was actually Ferb who put the idea in my head. I talked to him this morning because you had recommended that I should seek him out, and well, you know Ferb. He instantly noticed that I was hiding something, and he just didn’t stop staring at me until he’d figured it out.”

“That does sound like Ferb” Phineas agreed with a chuckle. “So? What did our – _my_ brother say to you?”

“Well, first of all he told me that he was busy and that I would be better off trying to reconcile with you,” I explained, “but when he had figured everything out he suggested that perhaps the reason I was so obsessive about you and Isabella was that I was insecure about my own relationship with Phineas. Now that part wasn’t true, because I love your counterpart and he loves me and I know that, but ever since Ferb said that I’ve been wondering whether there isn’t a small part of my mind that has shied away from the fact that I’m committing incest with my brother and that I can’t live my love life as freely as I could have if we wouldn’t have to keep our love a secret, and that part of my mind desperately wants to believe this was the only path I could have taken so there’s no point in regretting it, and that means demonizing all the competition.”

Phineas appeared thoughtful after my ramble, and although I had just provided the perfect opening for him to get me back for the comments I had made about him and Isabella I knew he wasn’t going to do that – these were the moments when I really wondered whether he was too good for me. “I understand” he said softly. “You aren’t worried about whether you love Phineas or not, you’re worried whether you’re doing the right thing – not just from a moral point of view, but also regarding the ways that has limited you and me and your children. And that’s why you didn’t want to believe that I could be happy with Isabella – because it would mean you took something from your Phineas that he could have had and now hasn’t, because he’s with you. Am I right?”

I was going to say that he was only half accurate, that the first part was on the mark but that the second part was entirely new… but now that I thought about it, it did sound right. I _was_ worried for Phineas’ sake. I remembered feeling what I did back at the school when I saw this Phineas see his daughter off, and the guilt I felt when I saw the public display of emotion my Phineas could never have with Amanda, or at least not like this. I nodded. “I think you’re at least on to something” I replied.

Phineas smiled. “But if you told me your Phineas loves you, then why worry about that? He’s taken this decision with you, aware of all the options, and from what I’ve heard from you you two have a close relationship. If this is what he wants, why should you worry about what he could have had?”

I shook my head in disbelief. This was just so… so Phineas. Unlike me freaking out at all these different relationships, here Phineas was – after some initial difficulty, of course, and I had no idea what he’d been up to over the past day – openly accepting that his counterpart was in love with me, heck, he was even trying to convince _me_ of that fact. A fact that, unlike back in my teenage days with Jeremy, I never really had reason to doubt in the first place. It was so unselfish and sweet, just like his counterpart was back in my dimension, and it made me want to go back to my Phineas and hug him and kiss him and never let him go again and put my hand up his shirt and down his pants and now his counterpart of this world was still staring at me and I should probably clear my mind of all those kind of inappropriate ideas.

Dealing with the local version of my brother, now. Sexy thoughts, later.

From the expression on local Phineas’ face, he was wondering whether his words had actually gotten through to me. “Maybe you should tell me exactly how you and your brother got together” he said. “That should allow me to understand more about where you’re coming from and maybe help you figure out the solution to your problems.”

“That’s fine” I said, breathing uncomfortably. “That’s all very well and good, but, if you don’t mind, I need to know the answer to another one of those problems first – to _our_ problem.”

For once, Phineas easily figured out what I was referring to. “Whether I’m going to help you or not? Come on, Candace, I would have thought you knew the answer to that from the moment I showed up. Yes, you hurt me yesterday, but I came to realize that you didn’t mean it that way, and well, alternate reality or not, romantic relationship with me or not…” He put his arm around my shoulder. “…you’re still my sister. I’m not going to let you down.”

I felt a familiar warmth spread through me that made me force myself to remember that this was not my Phineas. I put an arm around his shoulders, too. “Thanks, Phin. I don’t know if my other self has ever told you this, so I’ll tell you now – regardless of what she thinks of you romantically, you’re still the best brother she could have ever wished for.”

A slight blush came to his face, and I was struggling to remember not to kiss him when I heard my name called out from behind me. I let go of Phineas and turned around to see Jeremy approaching. He looked relaxed and content, one eye on me and Phineas and one on the kids (would you believe I’d forgotten all about them until now?) “I see you two made up.”

“Yeah, we talked about it and I think we came to the conclusion we both said some things we regretted” Phineas replied. “She did hurt me, but she didn’t mean to, and I knew she got carried away in the heat of the moment, so once I woke up this morning and thought about it a little more clearly I figured that I couldn’t leave her hanging like this.”

“I’m glad to hear that” Jeremy replied. “So have you figured out how to solve Candace’s problem yet? Yesterday she seemed determined that you were the only one who could fix it.”

Phineas and I exchanged glances, and I made several ‘sssh’ signs, hoping my brother would catch on and keep quiet about the fact that I was from another dimension. Phineas looked confused but eventually put on a cheerful smile. “Well, I think she has been having a few problems with stress and sleeping” he replied completely truthfully. “I think she might need to come over for a night or two so I can monitor her. If Ferb was here, all this would go a lot quicker, but the way it is now I think it might take a while.”

I was caught off-guard both by the smoother way he talked around the truth than I was used to and by his offer to have me stay over (especially because although I hadn’t told him yet, staying over at Jeremy’s _was_ getting on my nerves) and could only nod as Jeremy turned to me. “Are you okay with that, Candace?”

“Sure, I guess” I replied as casually as I could. “It would give me the chance to catch up with my brother, plus it would solve my problems faster, am I right?”

“Hopefully” Jeremy agreed. “Not to mention that if it works in any way, it would be a lot better than… well, you know.”

I remembered his words from when we were lying in bed together that first night, and it slightly annoyed me that I couldn’t figure out what he was talking about. I gave Phineas a look and shrugged as subtly as I could. My brother caught on. “You know what exactly, Jeremy?”

My non-husband looked at me for permission to speak, and when I nodded he sighed and proceeded in an awkward tone. Which was an unusual sound to hear because I remembered how laid-back he had always been in our relationship, except perhaps during that final night when we broke up, and on the night when Phineas and I got back together. “There was an… incident at Xavier’s school a few days ago” he said reluctantly. “One of the kids in Xavier’s class was mad because Xavier had helped his girlfriend break up with him, so he broke the girl’s science project and managed to frame Xavier for it. He didn’t just get in trouble with the girl but also with the school, and when Candace heard about it she called a parent-teacher conference in which she tried to convince the teachers that they were blaming the wrong guy. She even tried to look for evidence, but we couldn’t find anything. The teachers refused to listen, and then she got furious and physically assaulted them. The director of the school banned us after that and told Candace she should spend some time in a psychiatric clinic.”

Phineas looked at me with sympathy, which was kind of silly as he knew I was hearing the story for the first time too and hadn’t experienced it. “Oh, Candace…”

“My thoughts exactly” Jeremy murmured, turning towards me. “Honey, you know I’m on your side with this, and I fully understand how upset you were at the way Xavier was treated, but without evidence in our favor there is nothing we can do. And the way you went from calmly describing our arguments to giving two teachers a black eye… you snapped, Candace, and it unnerved me. I don’t want to force anything on you and I hope that your stay at Phineas’ home will help calm you down a little, but if not, you shouldn’t let shame keep you from trying to overcome your issues somewhere away from home.”

“I… I’ve had issues for years” I weakly replied. “Like my insecurity around you, my reactions to the boys’ projects, the way I was always yelling for Mom… but all that’s over, right? I should be able to overcome this hurdle too.”

“Of course” Phineas said, cutting into the conversation. “But there’s a difference between actually overcoming something and behaving like you’ve overcome something but snapping hard every time something bad happens. I’m afraid what Jeremy described sounds a lot like it’s the latter, sis.”

As Jeremy gave my brother a thoughtful look, I suddenly felt way too uncomfortable at all these discussions of how messed up my other self was. “I’ll try my best to fix it when I stay with Phineas” I promised. “Jeremy, do you think you’d be all right alone here with the kids for a couple of nights?”

“I don’t think that’ll be a problem” Jeremy mused, looking so at ease that I had to wonder whether the thought of getting a little breathing space from his wife’s problems didn’t secretly appeal to him. “Even if they are now apparently doing an anti-gravity athletics course. Was this your idea, Phineas?”

“It was mine, actually” I replied proudly. “Well, mine and Xavier’s. I decided to take some time to help Amanda get her brothers motivated, and it turned out like this. I’m glad they’re enjoying themselves at last – although I think they’re about done now.”

They were. Amanda, Xavier and Fred got down to the ground, their faces wet from sweating and excited from the fun they’d been having. They instantly ran for their uncle, hugging him and bombarding him with questions about him, ‘Aunt Isabella’ and Vicky. Jeremy and I watched them with amusement, while I was secretly relieved at least some family relationships here were close. “I guess that’ll preoccupy your brother for the next few minutes” Jeremy said. “I’ll help you pack your bags in the meantime.”

I blinked. “Sure.”

I followed him into the house, pondering about how fast this was suddenly going and which of my counterpart’s belongings I should realistically take along. Picking the wrong stuff there could make me suspicious again in Jeremy’s eyes, but for once I didn’t worry about that anymore. For the first time since yesterday, I was confident about two things.

One, that no matter what had happened between them, local Phineas loved his sister almost as much as my Phineas loved me.

Two, that because of that love, I had my hope to get home again.


	13. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> FLS Chapter, with the confrontation between Phineas and Baljeet. The story is moving a little slowly here, but we will have emotional climaxes again, I promise.

**_ Chapter Twelve _ **

Friday, July 2nd 2037  
9:30 AM    
Danville  
FLS-Verse

By the second night in the bizarre other world, I was already falling into a pattern. Eat dinner – avoid stares from local family members as much as possible throughout the night – avoid long conversation with everyone but Phineas, and only talk with Phineas about the practical issues around helping me get home – go to bed – try to sleep – wake up in the morning cursing about the fact that I still wasn’t home. I could tell my depression was not making Phineas any happier either, but I figured that if he was going to pull this off my happiness was not what his success would depend on. And it wasn’t all bad, because I still had a card up my sleeve.

The card came out about forty minutes after I had arrived at Flynn-Fletcher Incorporated once more, not wanting to stay home again and realizing I would need to smooth over his arrival. Phineas and I were just in his inner sanctum in the basement where he was giving his justifications about why he needed half a century to help me get back home (it involved a lot of boring equations) when Phineas’ intercom buzzed. “Mr. Flynn?” the pleasant voice of his young secretary said. “There’s someone here to see you, sir. He says he’s a childhood friend of yours, and that it’s important.”

Phineas looked confused, while I tacitly took a few steps back, because that was something I could only do covertly as long as he still had no idea what was going on. “That’s odd” he mused. “Did he tell you his name, Kirsty?”

There was a moment of silence before the reply came. “His name is Baljeet Tjinder, sir. He’s here to help with some problems that he says your sister’s been having.”

My brother froze up, and he just stared at the intercom for a while – almost long enough to get me worried about him. I could see his hesitation, the confrontation with a totally unexpected choice forcing him to reconsider his options. I still didn’t quite understand his reluctance but I hoped fiercely that he would let go of it, and fortunately he did. He nodded, first barely perceptible and then more firmly, and cleared his throat. “Send him through.”

“Of course, sir. Phineas.” There was way too much suck-up in the voice of Phineas’ secretary, but that was the last of my concerns as he turned towards me. His eyes were focused and carried a wariness in them that ensured I instantly knew he had figured out I was behind this. It honestly surprised me, because I hadn’t thought he would be that perceptive. It was Phineas, after all. Then again, I was a version of his wife, so obviously he would know my character a fair bit. (The mere thought of me turning out to have any similarities to the Candace who had chosen to wed her brother felt like punishment enough for meddling in Phineas’ affairs.)

“Did you overhear my conversation with Isabella about asking Baljeet for help?” he said, softly and outwardly calm. He was still holding a pen in his hand from what he had been working on earlier, but he paid little attention to it anymore.

I suppose I could have denied it, but I didn’t really feel like there was a point when Phineas wouldn’t believe me anyway. “Yes, yes I did” I replied. “And I also heard you don’t like the thought of asking his help for whatever reason, and I still called Baljeet’s number yesterday afternoon and asked him whether he wanted to help you. I knew you didn’t want this, and I didn’t tell him anything about you and your sister yet, but… this has to be done. You’ve admitted that you weren’t making much progress, and you _do_ want to have your own sister back soon, don’t you?”

That was a bit of a low blow, but it was necessary. Phineas cringed. “Yes, of course, but not at the expense…” He hesitated. “You don’t understand. Candace and I have been keeping our relationship a secret from people outside our family circle for twenty years. I can’t suddenly tell him, not without her consent, and I doubt he won’t figure it out in the time he’d be here.”

I sighed, suddenly feeling a bit more selfish than when I’d first come up with this plan (although I still felt that Phineas was wrong to keep from asking Baljeet’s help for what were essentially quite petty reasons. And it would be good for them to get back in close contact with one another the same way they were back home. So all things considered, I was actually helping, wasn’t I?) “I know it’s difficult, Phineas” I said soothingly. “But you can’t ask the other me for permission right now – and it’s not like you should anyway, because this is your secret as much as it’s hers – and you don’t want her trapped in my world for even longer, do you?”

Phineas nodded. “You’re right. You’re right. It’s just that… well, it was never my idea not to tell Buford and Baljeet, but it was one I certainly managed to get used to fast. Keeping a secret wasn’t easy, but over time it became easier than facing other people’s opinions and asking them to join our tight circle, you know? Not to mention that some of them, like Isabella or more recently Xavier, didn’t really take it well when Candace and I revealed the truth to them… but it is what it is. I can’t let Candace be stuck in your world for any longer than necessary.”

I wanted to say something in response – perhaps some acknowledgment of what he was doing, because I did feel a little sorry for the dilemma I’d put him in – but was interrupted by Baljeet entering. He looked around with fascination and gave Phineas a smile after he spotted him. “Good morning” he said, looking as much at the lab as he was at my brother. Given how nerdy he was, that probably wasn’t surprising. “You have certainly done well for yourself, old friend.”

“Well, you know how much I’ve always loved science, so given the chance…” Phineas said awkwardly. He cleared his throat. “It’s good to see you again, Baljeet. I… I’m glad to hear you volunteered to help me out.”

Baljeet shrugged. “You were always there for me when we were young, and once I heard from your sister’s other dimensional self I realized that I could not leave you hanging here. You and Candace have always been close, and I cannot imagine how badly you must feel about not being able to repair the situation, especially since Ferb was absent.”

“Yeah, it was certainly frustrating” Phineas agreed. “At first I had faith that everything would turn out fine, you know? Like it always had. But… well, I took Candace to the lab, and I eventually realized that I still couldn’t figure out what had gone wrong, and how to fix it. I had all these ideas, of course, but the brain is a tricky thing, and this is Candace, so I couldn’t just try anything on her with the freedom to experiment that I usually have, and… well, without Ferb…” He sighed, sitting down. “Ferb is always there for me to work out the kinks in my ideas. And when I get stuck on something, he always helps me through. Now he’s not here, not when I need him, and I am really the only one to blame for that. I never should have tried this without him being there, but I was so enthusiastic, and Candace – well, my Candace – was willing to help me out, so…” He shook his head. “It’s fine. It’ll all be fine.”

It had been a long time since I had seen my brother so in the dumps – although I wasn’t sure whether I was buying how desolate he appeared to be, because he hadn’t seemed to be that depressed before and it’s not like Phineas can hide anything he feels from me – but Baljeet took it seriously. He put a hand on his shoulder and gave my brother a sympathetic look. “I understand, Phineas” he said. “You do not need to worry. We will help you through it.” He cleared his throat. “If you do not mind me asking… when did you come to this realization?”

Phineas frowned, probably not understanding the intent behind the question. “The very same afternoon of the day Candace arrived, I think” he said. “It hit in full by the evening. I had a hard time sleeping because of it.”

Baljeet nodded. “I understand. The reason I am asking – and maybe it is nothing, but it is something that I was wondering – was that in the old days you would have called me for help the next morning, perhaps the very same night. It surprises me a little that your sister’s other self only called me yesterday afternoon, and I sensed that she was possibly going behind your back with it. You… you did know you could always turn to me for help, did you not?”

The underlying tone that betrayed Baljeet’s confusion over the way they had grown apart over the last twenty years to a point where he _hadn’t_ been a friend Phineas relied on anymore was hard to miss, and the uncomfortable expression on Phineas’ face acknowledged it. “Well, it hadn’t been that long yet” he replied. “Not more than two days, in fact.”

Baljeet cast me a look suggesting that that wasn’t what I had said, which didn’t really make sense because I hadn’t said anything about the time that had passed since my arrival (I might have kind of _implied_ that it had been longer than it really was, though). He nodded. “I see. Still, I am surprised you managed all that long. I do not want to cast doubt on your abilities, but it has been two full days and a morning and Other Dimension Candace is still here. In the old days, you would have reached out for help sooner, and you certainly wouldn’t – would not – have been too proud to do so.” He sighed. “I hate to put you under so much pressure while I have only just stepped into the room, but I feel like we were going to have to talk about this sooner or later anyway if we are going to work together to bring your sister home, so… what happened, Phineas? Did I do something to anger you? And please don’t say it was just a matter of time and distance that caused us to grow apart. I might have bought that at first, but not the fourth time you didn’t greet me in the supermarket. I began to realize then that you were trying to avoid me, and I would have left you be in peace were it not that you asked for my help – or rather, your sister did – and I figured that now would be as good a time as any to come to your help and in the process discover what was going on with you and me, and with you and Buford too.”

Phineas’ entire demeanor was chilly and introverted by now, as he was deliberately facing away from us. I felt conflicted – on one hand, I felt genuinely sorry and perhaps a bit frightened at being the one who had forced him into this uncomfortable position, but on the other, I relished the confirmation of what I’d already thought. The way this dimension’s Phineas and Candace (and probably Ferb and Isabella, too) had distanced themselves from their friends hadn’t been natural, and at least on Baljeet’s part it had formed into a mental wound that had been allowed to fester until this day.

“You’re right, Baljeet” he eventually replied. “There is something we’ve been keeping from you, which will explain why I haven’t been as close to you in the past years as I once was. I’m sorry. It just became too awkward for me to keep hanging out with you while constantly being afraid that I’d spill the beans. I’m not sure I can tell you the truth without conferring with Candace about it, though. It’s a rather… intimate secret.”

The way he was wrestling for the right words to use was noticeable to both Baljeet and myself, and the Indian man looked more understanding yet sad than offended that his old friend was admitting to deliberately allowing their relationship to falter. “It is something that is intimate… between you and Candace?” he replied.

“Well, yeah” Phineas said, his voice almost a whisper. “You see, Candace and I… we… well, she’s very important to me, so… I…”

“You two are a couple, are you not?”

It was interesting to see Phineas’ reaction, although I had to admit that I was surprised as well that Baljeet had figured it out (and a little more assured that bringing him in had been the right thing to do). “What makes you think so?” he replied, trying and failing to keep his voice steady.

Baljeet shrugged. “I am not really sure. Just so you know, it is not something I have secretly suspected for years or anything like that. But I still know you, Phineas, and I remember how close you were to Candace. And there is the whole matter concerning how much your nephew – your son, I suppose – looks like you. I would have liked to have been able to figure it out on my own, but I have to admit that it was not until you started talking about a secret regarding your relationship with Candace just now that I did, and it suddenly felt like puzzle pieces clicking into place. It just makes too much sense.”

Phineas breathed deeply. “You’re not giving me any room to deny it, then.”

“Were you planning on doing so?”

My brother shook his head. “No. There wouldn’t be any point. I…” He smiled awkwardly. “Well, at least now you know why we grew apart. I would have wanted to tell you, but Candace was all about letting as few people into our inner circle as possible, and you might have been my friend but you weren’t… well, you know. Like Ferb, or Isabella.”

Baljeet nodded, but remained silent. Phineas nervously charged on. “Look, I understand if this disturbs you or makes you not want to work with me anymore, but Candace needs our help. Even if you don’t agree with what we’ve done, please don’t take that out on her. Let me take the burden. If you want to inform people about our…”

“I never said that I no longer wanted to help you, Phineas” Baljeet replied patiently. “Yes, this news does disturb me, and I doubt that I would ever be able to agree with your actions, but I don’t want to let that stop me from helping out an old friend. I might need some time to get over the news and reconsider later, but for now, I am with you all the way.”

Phineas’ relief was clearly visible. “Thanks, Baljeet” he responded. “Should I show you the plans I’ve drawn up for bringing Candace back? It should help you to… well, get your mind off things.”

Baljeet nodded. “Yes, I suppose that would be wise.” He and Phineas walked over to the central table of the viewing room and I tagged along, feeling lucky that neither of the guys was paying attention to me and wondering whether Phineas had actually made any progress over the past two days. Unfortunately, the technobabble that soon came out of both their mouths was enough to make me lose interest. I sat down on an oddly placed chair and was just on the verge of falling asleep – cut me some slack, I had nothing to do! – when I heard a loud gasp. I stood back up and instantly noticed Phineas had a deathly pale look on his face, while Baljeet was trying to comfort him.

“Is something wrong?” I asked. “Are you feeling okay, Phineas?”

Phineas just stared at the readings in front of him, appearing even more shocked than he had been when I’d sprung the news about Baljeet on him this morning. “I’m fine, Candace” he lied. “Or well, I will be anyway. It’s nothing for you to concern yourself about.”

I nodded, the motion feeling familiar even though Phineas had his back turned to me and was making no moves to turn around. “Okay… can I get you anything? Some water, maybe?” I don’t know why I was offering, since I definitely didn’t owe him anything, but well, maybe I was feeling a rare moment of compassion for my brother’s counterpart. No matter the freaky things he did, he was still human, and he was still a version of my blood sibling. From that point of view, a bit of sibling affection was natural.

Phineas shook his head. “No, thank you. I… I think I would appreciate it the most if you remained in the main room. Baljeet and I have some things to discuss here, and you can ask my secretary for something to read. I don’t know to what extent my Candace’s tastes in literature are the same as yours, but there has to be something there you find interesting. I’ll talk to you again before we leave. We do still have something to discuss, after all.”

With that thinly veiled reference to the fact that I hadn’t informed him about Baljeet earlier he cut off the conversation and sat down clinging onto the papers. Baljeet looked concerned and turned towards me, motioning that I should just go. And although it wasn’t in my nature to walk out when strange things were happening and I was feeling curious about what Phineas was trying to keep from me, I still went. Maybe that sibling compassion thing I mentioned just now really exists.

I spent a few hours just sitting there, wondering whether there was anything useful I could do before eventually relenting and admitting to myself that no, I couldn’t do much here, I had done enough by getting Baljeet to help Phineas, and I should probably take up his advice and get something to read. I contacted my brother’s secretary and was given some of my counterpart’s reading material, which was casual literature mixed with professional magazines about law, some of which I was unfamiliar with but which reminded me of the books I’d read back home. I remembered the night I’d stayed over at Grandpa and Grandma Fletcher’s home in England and Stacy and I had read all her Sherlock Holmes books. I wasn’t as fast a reader anymore as I was in those days, but I still managed to get through the book series fairly quickly. It was about 2 PM when I had finished everything and decided that I’d better check up on what Phineas was doing. Wouldn’t want him to slack off on me, after all.

Fortunately, when I found Phineas and Baljeet they were busy at work doing calculations and they indeed didn’t even notice my approach at first. When I cleared my throat, Phineas looked up at me and smiled. “Ah, Candace” he said cheerfully, although I could tell part of that was a mask to hide his wariness with the whole ordeal. “Did you have a good time? I figured there would probably be something among that stack that fit you, but you _are_ a fast reader, so…”

“It was nice” I replied, not wanting to be drawn into a discussion about books. “Did you and Baljeet manage to figure out how to get me home yet?”

The expression on Phineas and Baljeet’s faces told me enough before Baljeet even opened his mouth to speak. “We have tried to recalibrate the mental transmitter” he said. “You should now be able to use it for another test, but given the fact that Phineas says all readings are similar to the ones he got during the original test, which backfired, I would doubt the viability of such a test and…”

“I’ll do it” I resolved, taking the helmet off the table and lying down on the lab bed. I have to admit that I did feel a little bit of hesitation, but I knew from experience that the only way to succeed at something was to try and try and keep trying, and not trying at all because it might be too risky wasn’t my style. It probably wasn’t Phineas’ style either, although the uncomfortable expression in his eyes told me things might be different on that account in this reality.

To his credit, my brother actually recovered from the surprise of my sudden decision soon enough to nod and help hook me up to the equipment. I was beginning to feel some discomfort, but shook it off. Of course it would work. Maybe not right away, but it would work soon enough. I had been spending two and a half days in this reality already and it was making me feel anxious. I needed to get home, sooner rather than later.

I had been hoping that as soon as Phineas turned the equipment on, I would feel something that would tell me I was making contact with different dimensions (a stray thought warned me that this experiment could very well backfire and strand me in an unrelated dimension in which the local Phineas or Ferb might not have the means to help me get home, thus further complicating the situation, but I shook it off. Couldn’t afford to panic right now.) but nothing happened. All the machine did was give me a headache.

“Is that thing even on?” I asked, trying not to sound as irritated as I felt.

“It’s on” Phineas replied. “Maybe not at maximum strength, but we didn’t do that last time around either and… well, this is a risky procedure, Candace. I know what you want me to do, but you have to realize that not only is your body at stake, my Candace’s is as well.”

I frowned, having indeed been about to ask him for that. “I know, Phineas” I replied. “But can’t you at least yank it up a little? If this doesn’t yield _any_ results, then keeping the machine at this level might be very healthy both for me and for my counterpart, but it will also keep us stuck in our respective worlds forever.”

Phineas sighed. “I see your point” he said evenly. “Baljeet, can you turn it up just a little more?”

I noticed the machine whirring to life behind me, and the pounding in my head was intensifying. Part of me thought I was actually getting somewhere and reaching out, although that might just be wishful thinking. It hurt, though. Like being hit by five hammers at once. I wanted to go on, I wanted to go home…

…but I couldn’t.

“Stop” I breathed, and luckily either Phineas or Baljeet managed to catch what I was saying. The machine was gradually turned off, and a few moments later my brother was in the room standing next to me, placing a tentative hand on my shoulder. I hesitated before shoving it off, but I did allow him to help me back up. There was nothing that could remotely be construed as non-sibling like about _that_ , after all.

“The test yielded some… interesting results” Baljeet announced, walking in with some papers he’d just printed and showing them to Phineas. I don’t think I would have been able to grasp much about them even if I hadn’t been suffering from the worst headache ever. “We are getting closer. I wouldn’t be able to tell to what we are actually getting close, but I think there are signs of progress.”

I duly nodded. “Do you need me to hook back on again?” I asked him.

Baljeet hastily shook his head. “We cannot ask that from you, certainly not now. Maybe in a few hours, after we have had a chance to go over all the data, we should try again and we could actually book some progress. In the meantime, maybe I could call Ginger and ask her to get you some books from my library to read?” Seeing my alarmist expression, he continued: “I know what you’re thinking, but my tastes _are_ fairly broad. There must be something among those books which you will find enjoyable.”

I nodded, even though in reality the way I’d reacted hadn’t been because of the potentially boring content of the books – instead, it had been because I was only now realizing that I probably wouldn’t get home today either. We were making progress, and if I hadn’t called Baljeet I probably wouldn’t have had the prospect of possibly going home tomorrow at all, but it still stung. “Thank you” I replied sincerely. “I’ll be out in the lab. You two can talk about sciencey stuff by yourselves then.”

I was about to leave when Phineas cleared his throat. “Can I speak to you for a moment first, Candace?”

It didn’t take a genius to figure out what the conversation would be about. “Sure” I replied. “In private, I take it?”

Phineas nodded, so we walked out of the core lab and into the wider room, wandering aimlessly past the benches on which unfinished prototypes rested. “Look, I’m sorry I had to call him” I began before Phineas could even say a word. “I should have probably asked your permission, but I’d caught a bit of your conversation with Isabella last night and I knew you would be against it, and you understand why I had to do this, don’t you?”

My brother sighed. “You may be right” he admitted. “And it certainly turned out better thus far than either my Candace or I could have dared hope. Baljeet hasn’t walked out on me, and he hasn’t given any indication that he will want to tell anyone yet, apart perhaps from his wife and Buford. But even so, I feel like I shouldn’t have allowed him to get involved in our lives without asking my Candace first. This is about our relationship, after all.”

“Of course” I replied soothingly. “But your… your Candace isn’t here, and I’m sure she wouldn’t want you to try to do the impossible alone for her sake.” All right, maybe I didn’t actually _know_ that, but I knew that I probably wouldn’t so that was fair enough, what with us being the same person and all. “It’s a paradox – you can’t ask her for permission to involve Baljeet if she’s not here, and you can’t bring her back without involving Baljeet. Not to mention that you don’t have to involve her in every decision you make. You’re not dependent on your sister, Phineas. If you think something’s right, then you should be able to make the decision to do that thing without worrying what Candace might think.”

“That’s not it” Phineas insisted. “Or at least, not exactly. It’s… it’s a long story, I suppose. There are plenty of things in our relationship that I do without Candace’s input. I even told our parents about us without telling Candace first, because I knew she wanted to do it but couldn’t bring herself to do it because she was afraid what they would say. But that time I had gotten clear indications – yes, even I can pick up a hint every once in a while – that she wanted to tell Mom and Dad. She’s never given any indication that she’d want me to tell Baljeet before, and she has always wanted to keep the secret limited to as few people as possible.”

“But it worked, right?” I argued. “Baljeet’s at work to help you without even blinking an eye at your weird relationship with your sister. Something I still don’t understand, by the way. Is nobody around here going to react to this? Have you never ever faced consequences for your actions?”

Phineas blinked. “Well, there was that one time when we told Meap, and he was really disappointed with us” he replied. “He had us put in a time-out for over two hours.” He smiled. “Luckily, Candace and I were able to enjoy ourselves.” I wasn’t sure whether that meant what I thought it meant, but I wasn’t going to pry. “Anyway, even in that case, Candace and I made the decision to tell Meap together.”

“You had no problem telling _me_ on your own, though” I pointed out.

Phineas snorted. “That’s different. You’re her counterpart, not to mention that I couldn’t very well hide the truth from you if we were going to be living in the same house together. I suspect that she’s already told your own brother for the same reasons.”

I nodded, wondering if Other Candace had indeed sought my Phineas out because she believed he would be able to help her get home. Perhaps she’d tried to convince him to date me, and when I would get home I’d still have my brother pining after me? Although I believed that my own brother was saner than that, I had not seen him in a while and I knew his marriage wasn’t always perfect. I couldn’t count on Other Candace failing. I really had to get home as soon as possible.

“Look, Phineas” I replied. “I’m sorry I brought you into these problems, but you brought me into _your_ problems when your machine switched my mind with that of your sister, and sometimes you’ve got to resort to extreme measures to fix those things. I’m sure my counterpart will be understanding of the difficult decisions you had to take.”

Phineas sighed. “I guess you’re right” he replied, and I could see my slight guilt-tripping of him about our original mind swap was doing most of the work in convincing him. He looked sideways at me, and I could spot an analytical expression in his eyes. It reminded me a bit of the way he had looked at me earlier. The creepy comparisons between me and his own sister weren’t coming back, were they? I almost instinctively stiffened.

“Candace?” he asked me. “I know this is a stressful time for you too, and I know our relationship has been difficult from the start, but I wouldn’t want us to have to part on miserable terms in the end. Would you mind… would you be interested in going bowling tomorrow night, if we haven’t been able to reverse the situation by then?”

My head shot up. “Wait, you mean like a date?”

“What? No, of course not!” Phineas almost looked honestly offended. “I meant it like a family night out. We’d be taking Xavier and Amanda along, of course. It might give you a chance to relax. I know you’re not feeling like relaxing right now, but if you at least gave it a shot it might be able to help you.”

Although my instincts said no, I couldn’t actually find any flaws in the plan. Xavier and Amanda joining us would probably be able to prevent their father from going too far, and I was feeling pretty stressful. Not to mention that I still felt a bit uneasy both at the way I had cajoled Baljeet into helping him behind his back and at the fact that he was doing all this to help me (well, and my counterpart of course). I sighed and, after a few moments of deliberation, I nodded. “I guess that wouldn’t hurt.”

Phineas smiled, looking far too delighted for a simple bowling night with his sister’s counterpart. “Great! I’ll be looking forward to that. Don’t worry, Candace, sooner or later we will get you home.”

As he walked off, I reflected on how that did not feel at all reassuring. But at the same time, I knew it was all he could say to me. For better or for worse, I’d have to hold out here for the next day or so. I could do this. I hadn’t gone crazy thus far, and I wouldn’t go crazy now.

But all the voices whispering in my head really made me wonder for how long I would be able to keep that up.


	14. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another chapter, and one where if you'll pay attention you might note the dates have been somewhat retconned. There is a good reason for that - roughly from the moment I first started uploading this fic I've been thinking about whether or not Phineas and Candace had their kids too young, and after a lot of deliberation I finally decided to move those dates ahead four years. Therefore, the present-day of this story is now 2037 rather than 2033. Candace was born in 1995, Phineas in 1999, they had Amanda in 2024 and Xavier in 2027 which was seventeen years after the year I decided the canon show takes place, which is 2010. Sounds simple, right? Not exactly, because it means that a lot of dates needed to be retconned and storylines needed to be slightly adjusted. I've only recently fixed all this for the drabbles I wrote, and I'm far from finished with fixing it in this fic, especially since we're dealing with two sets of Phineas and Candaces here who have different children at different ages. And then there's the fact that this fanfic is also on Fanfiction . Net, where editing chapters is a lot less easy than it is here. Oh well. Such is life. So if at any point you reread this fanfic and start getting confused by the dates, just know that there are a lot of things I haven't fixed yet. 
> 
> About the actual chapter itself, this one takes place in the AYA-dimension (obviously), and deals with Candace trying to fit in with her brother's alternate family. It doesn't always work. And yes, this chapter takes place on July 1st whereas the previous one takes place on July 2nd. That's actually not an error, because things have been moving at a faster pace in the FLS-dimension (alternatively, fewer important things happened) than in the AYA-dimension. It will all match up in the end, I promise. The dates of Thursday and Friday, on the other hand, are still erroneous because the 2037 calendar does not fit with 2033 and that means I'll have to revisit every single instance of a week day being mentioned throughout the fic. Oh well. *sighs*
> 
> (Incidentally, this is the first time I've noticed how awkward the 'Chapter X: Chapter X-1' format reads as the chapter title. I've been constantly moving the chapter titles one step back because this story has a prologue, but maybe I should do something about that as well.)

**_ Chapter Thirteen _ **

Thursday, July 1st 2037  
9:00 PM    
Danville  
AYA-Verse

Although I had overoptimistically felt that everything would start heading in the right direction now that Local Phineas had generously invited me to stay at his house, it soon turned out that I’d perhaps slightly overestimated my luck. While Phineas was as friendly and welcoming as ever and Vicky was enthusiastic about getting to spend some time with her estranged aunt, the problem that had emerged the previous day continued to haunt us – Isabella.

Local Phineas Flynn’s wife remained neutral to me after Phineas and I got to his home, but I could tell that she really didn’t like me being there. It felt like she was trying to hide and bury her feelings, though. Maybe she was feeling sorry for the way she (too) had overreacted yesterday? Fortunately my brother had apparently already told her about the fact that I was going to be staying with them, so that fact alone drew no reaction out of her apart from a curt greeting at the door.

I was mostly occupied with Phineas that night, really, and of course with settling in. And although I was happy to be invited over and tried to stay in good spirits, after dinner I couldn’t help but wonder whether there were any realistic prospects that he’d actually be able to help me. Seeing his house, seeing his interaction with Isabella and seeing his daughter impressed more than ever before the fact on me that he was different from the Phineas I knew. He was up to late at night making telephone calls with people he otherwise would have met in person today and writing down notes about his work, while Isabella was doing some house work and Vicky was watching television, which constricted my activities to just sitting at the living room table doing nothing. I did peer over Vicky’s shoulder to watch TV, but children’s animation has taken another fall after the heights it reached during the days when my brothers and I were teenagers, and some of it was just painful to watch. I’d sat through a lot of this when Amanda and Xavier were Vicky’s age – I didn’t want to go through it again. At least Vicky herself seemed to recognize that a lot of shows were stupid; from the bored expression in her eyes, it was clear she was only watching it because there wasn’t anything else on. But it was preferable to when she turned off the TV and started texting on her cell phone later, because before that at least I’d had something to do. I didn’t want to be a bother and ask whether I could watch their television and conversations with either Vicky, Phineas or Isabella didn’t last long, which put me very close to the point where I just wanted to walk out and go for a nature walk to lament about my fate.

Fortunately, at that point the evening took an upturn when Phineas emerged from what he told me was his ‘office’ and which seemed to be his private space in the way the basement lab in our own house was my own brother’s. He invited Vicky and me to play a card game and then appeared enthusiastic when I proposed Skiddley Whiffers. It even gave me the opportunity to do something I always enjoy, initiating a new player to the game, because Vicky had apparently never played before. Although she finished last, she clearly enjoyed the sensation. And so did I.

The positive experience had given me a fresh sense of optimism on top of the fact that I was sure we would be making more progress now that I was living with my brother rather than with Jeremy, an optimism that was needed when immediately after the game Vicky headed off to bed and Isabella announced that it was about time for her and Phineas to head in as well. I tried to communicate with my brother by means of hand signals, but all I got from Phineas was a vaguely reassuring smile before he headed off to sleep with his wife, and I was forced to go to the spare bedroom.

I knew Phineas had a life of his own here, and that I couldn’t ask from him that he’d be devoting all his time and effort to helping me get home. But even with that in mind, I couldn’t help but be frustrated at the fact that he hadn’t said much about what his plans were to help me out ever since I got here. It had been rather late when he brought me back here, but at least we could have done some planning. I supposed that I could console myself with the fact that he’d probably have less work to do tomorrow thanks to doing all this tonight, and then he could focus on helping me get home.

But then there was Isabella. And for crying out loud, I knew it was irrational to be this jealous of her, especially because it wasn’t my Phineas, but I couldn’t stand the thought that she was the one lying next to him now rather than me. I… I missed him. I needed him. I wanted my brother’s comforting arm around my shoulder, telling me that even if things weren’t great right now they were still going to be all right. Now, I was lying alone in a guest room while one room over Phineas was sleeping next to Isabella, while she was probably telling him all kinds of malicious stories about me.

The thought kept me awake for an hour until I finally fell into a restless sleep, and it was the first idea that my confused mind came up with when I was awake again. So not only was she keeping me away from Phineas, she was also keeping me from some much-needed rest.

Curse you, Other Dimension Isabella Garcia-Shapiro.

Reflecting on my writing, I do wonder at times whether my description of Isabella’s other self isn’t perhaps just a little bit unfair. She is, after all, the counterpart of my best friend, and I can’t really blame her for being protective of Phineas and her relationship with him. I knew all about being possessive of boyfriends over threats to us being together, whether they be real or imagined. And if that was the only part of Phineas’ life she was possessive about, I might have been able to relate to her. But, well, it was not.

You see, if I have to sum up the way Isabella treated me the entire time I was over at Local Phineas’ house with one word, it would be ‘cordially’. She was polite to me when I came over, and I could only guess about what they had talked about overnight. Her attitude to Phineas was just a little bit softer than it had been before and there were no more open arguments between them for the entire night, but I could tell that she wasn’t happy with me being there. Even if I was trying not to meddle in their affairs, the fact that she didn’t want me around Phineas made me feel vindicated. If she felt that threatened by her husband’s own sister, there was no way their relationship could be in good shape, could there? It reminded me of that dream I had once about the Wizard of Oz. The main things I had remembered from it was that Jeremy still looked cute when he was a tree and that it couldn’t hurt to let go and have fun with my brothers (I wish I’d taken that to heart more right away, but I _was_ really stubborn at that age) but I also distinctly recalled how insistent dream-Isabella had been about me taking the yellow sidewalk in order to bust my brothers when in the end it turned out that that was impossible and all staying on the yellow sidewalk had done was costing me the chance to have fun. (The song was nice, though.) I’d been told that Isabella told everyone to take the sidewalk, but wasn’t it oddly suspicious that she had deliberately steered me on a path to busting my brothers of which the only real result could be driving a wedge between them and me? Had dream-Isabella felt threatened by me being around Phineas, and did real Isabella share those feelings? Dream-Isabella was based on my perception of real Isabella, after all, and if real Isabella harbored feelings of jealousy towards me over Phineas that my subconscious self had picked up on… (Okay, you could say I’m reading too much into one dream here, but it was my dream and I’ll read into it what I want, so there.)

And then, there was the conversation we had early in the morning.

I hadn’t seen it coming when it happened, and to be honest I wasn’t really looking for a talk either. After that first impression the previous evening I had seen quite enough of this version of Isabella, not to mention that talking served no point and only reminded me of the differences of this reality. I needed Phineas’ help, not hers.

It therefore came as a surprise to me when, after an awkward breakfast which was made more awkward by Vicky being very loud (even here Phineas’ offspring hadn’t been completely spared of his obliviousness to tension), I had only just made my bed in order for the day when Isabella entered the room. Judging from the way she was wringing her hands, she was looking for a conversation.

“Hey, Candace,” she said with an attempted smile. “Did you have a good night’s sleep?”

“Yeah, decently enough” I replied casually. “The room is… nice. Thank you.”

“You’re welcome” Isabella replied. “Do you need anything else? An extra pillow, maybe? Phineas told me you had sleeping problems, so if you had any trouble with that last night maybe I could...”

I wondered just how much he had told her – clearly not everything, especially as Phineas had just told me on the drive over this afternoon to keep quiet around Isabella since he didn’t want to involve her in this (his lack of moral objections to keeping things a secret was one thing which, if I’m honest, I found refreshing about this version of my brother.) “That won’t be necessary” I replied. “I’m fine, Isabella. Maybe there are a couple of… issues that I still have to deal with, but I don’t think there’s anything more you could do for me on that front.”

My sister-in-law (in both universes) nodded. “Candace, I know you probably heard something about the argument Phineas and I had over the phone yesterday” she said uncomfortably. “And I figured I should go over and tell you not to take it personally, because the problem is not that I’m against Phineas helping you out.” She sat down on the bed, and I decided to sit down next to her. “It just feels so incredibly unfair that he pays so much more attention when you are involved than whenever Vicky and I need him. I know he loves us, but that makes it all the more frustrating when he’s abroad so often and is preoccupied with work whenever he is at home. And to see him make a 180 turn when you are in trouble just makes it… sting, I guess. I’m not saying my problems are more serious than yours, but it’s strange that there is such a huge gap between him paying almost no attention to me and jumping at the chance to help you.”

“I… see” I replied. “You feel like for a husband, he’s not attentive enough to you. That he’s too distant. Has it always been this way?” I was pretty sure it had, but I wanted to hear it from her personally. Call me petty. I don’t particularly care.

Isabella leaned back. “No, oddly enough. Phineas was the perfect gentleman to me in the first weeks after we started dating, and it felt really refreshing to finally get what we both wanted for so long and had missed out on because I had been too shy to speak up and Phineas hadn’t realized his feelings and then didn’t know how to express them.” Aaand off went my sympathy for her. Which admittedly wasn’t there in great quantities to begin with. “We had   our issues in the first year or so, which couple doesn’t? And I remember us having a big fight right before our wedding. We were so angry at each other that I almost considered breaking up with him but I didn’t, and a few days later he came back to apologize. He said that he was sorry, that he had never meant to hurt me and that he loved me, and then he asked for my hand in marriage.”

I nodded, trying to think of ways to change the subject because that goofy nostalgic smile on her face was really getting on my nerves. Do I ever look like that? I’d have to ask Phineas. Or Amanda, because she’s more likely to give me a real answer. But I digress. “So, do you ever think about why Phineas is acting the way he does?”

Isabella hesitated. “I… I really don’t know. I want to talk to him about it, and every time I bring it up he starts out defensive like you saw yesterday and eventually he tries to apologize for it, but he never really changes! And I can’t really tell him off for it because he does have important work-related things, but he never used to be such a workaholic, not even as a kid when he was always inventing rather than focusing on the things that really – rather than focusing on social interaction with his friends and family! These aren’t just incidents, Candace, but they have a pattern, and the pattern seems to be that he doesn’t _want_ to spend time with me anymore! He is more preoccupied with work than with me, and that is not the guy I married, and sometimes I wonder whether he even loves me at all and just the thought should be ridiculous because it’s _Phineas_ , my soul mate, and we still have a lot of good times together if I’m honest but...” She sighed. “I sometimes feel like I don’t _know_ him anymore, Candace. Vicky probably gets him better than I do, and she is nine years old.”

I nodded. “Maybe you’re getting the root of the problem wrong” I told her. “Maybe the thing isn’t that Phineas doesn’t love you, because he does,” it felt like an achievement just to admit that and I could barely stop myself from slipping in a ‘probably’, “but that he doesn’t love what you want him to do or to be.”

Isabella frowned. “And what, exactly, would be the difference?”

Well, it looked like I had hit upon the crux of the problem. “The difference is that Phineas wasn’t just oblivious or uninterested in romance because he was too young for it, Isabella” I explained patiently. “It’s just the way he happens to be. Romance isn’t and has never been the end to everything for him the way it has been to you. If you say he loves you, you should know that isn’t the only thing in his life. He’s not just a centaur from Phineasland, he’s a person with opinions and feelings outside of those he might have for you, and those shouldn’t make him worth less to you.”

“How do you – what do you – I know all that” Isabella spluttered. “Phineas isn’t just… well, he’s got his own thoughts and feelings, and he’s entitled to them. I know that, Candace. I’m not a single-minded little girl with a crush anymore.”

“You may know that,” I replied, careful not to make the same mistakes I’d made with Phineas but at the same time not really caring because it was just Alternate Isabella. “But do you _feel_ it? Knowing something and feeling it are very different things. Remember that one time we travelled around the world and Phineas gave up hope half-way through and just wanted to sit with you? You got him out of his depression and encouraged him to put working to get us home before just wanting to hang out with you. You had learned then that there is more to life, and there is certainly more to Phineas, than romance.” My world’s Isabella had moved on from there to eventually accept that Phineas wasn’t the one for her and that she should approach her next romance differently. This Isabella had seen everything she’d ever wanted to have unfold that way with just a few snags along the line. She was entitled and complacent, and I couldn’t help but wonder… “Do you think you’d still be able to make that same decision today?”

Isabella was silent for a few moments. The next time she looked up, she gave me an unexpectedly grim and spiteful look. “You really think you can just waltz up and tell me all that, Candace?” she said, folding her arms. “Since when do you even care about what Phineas thinks? You haven’t bothered to get in touch with him in months.”

Okay, so she was clearly pissed off now, and I had to pressure myself to go for damage control rather than yell back at her. The fact that she was getting defensive proved that I was right, and it was easier to fess up to Other Candace’s faults than to my own anyway. “You’re right, I haven’t seen Phineas in too long” I replied. “I think it might be because there are some things between us and we haven’t properly talked about them in a while. But you know, we lead different lives. You on the other hand live together with him. If anyone should be talking to Phineas, it’s you.”

My sister-in-law frowned. “Oh, please. You think I don’t talk to him? I talk to Phineas all the time… when he’s actually home, of course.”

“You argue with him, all right” I replied. “But do you ever really talk to him about what bothers you and about what bothers him? You may talk a lot, but do you ever listen or do you just push him into the defensive and not listen to what he has to say?”

“I…” Isabella stammered. She stared at me for a moment, trying to take every opportunity not to have to say something so she could think properly about her answer. “I listen to what he has to say, and I don’t have to hear out his side of the story every time because I already know it. I know what he wants, and what he needs…”

“Which are to you undoubtedly two different things you’re trying to reconcile” I cut in easily.

“…and I try to be the best wife to him. I love him. He loves me. What more do we need?” Isabella sighed. “It’s not like _you_ ever talk to him. You keep to yourself all the time, half the times Phineas invites you over you’re busy, and last time you even missed Vicky’s birthday!” It was clear that one had struck a particular chord with Isabella – it was nice to see that no matter her flaws, she was still trying to be a good mother and defended her daughter’s interests. “Have you ever given any thought to taking your own advice and doing something about that?”

I nodded. “As a matter of fact, I have. I was just going to talk to him right now, actually.” I walked over to the door, looking over my shoulder at a stunned Isabella. “And you know what? I’m pretty sure our discussion will be helpful, because I know what his needs and my flaws are because I’ve thought about them and analyzed them. And that’s what you have always failed to do.” With that, and with the knowledge that continuing the discussion with Isabella for any longer would not be healthy for either of us, I left the room and paced down the stairs.

It was unusual that the conversation was both satisfying and frustrating. I knew I’d struck a nerve – Isabella was indeed worried about Phineas not being into the same things she was into, and given that in every good marriage a man and his wife have to have something in common she was beginning to worry whether she married the wrong guy. But she just wouldn’t admit it! And Phineas, for all his good traits, didn’t want to admit it either. If only they were honest to each other and to me and admitted the faults in their marriage, then maybe it would finally be clear to both of them how broken _their_ relationship was…

…and I would be able to stop worrying about the minor deficiencies in my own.

I shook off that thought and headed down into the basement. It was certainly different from my Phineas’ lab. There were computers, scattered papers, a book or two, and odd objects stacked on shelves which I presumed were film props. There was also a cabinet filled with awards, something which made me feel a glimmer of pride for my lover’s counterpart. I did wonder why the prizes were all stacked up here rather than in the living room. Was it Phineas’ modesty? Or just Isabella being unable to stand reminders from the job that kept her husband away from her so much anymore?

Well, I guessed it didn’t really matter. Not to mention that there was something else that caught my eye. “Phineas?” I spoke up. “What’s Mom and Dad’s grandfather clock doing there?”

My brother looked up from his work, and even if he didn’t wear glasses here I could see his eyes were slightly saggy. Stress, probably. “What are you talking about?” he replied. “That clock never belonged to Mom and Dad – I bought it in an antique store, and Isabella and I have had it for years.”

I frowned. “We also bought it in an antique store in our world, but it was always going to be a present for Mom and Dad. I think it was… for their twentieth wedding anniversary?”

Phineas blinked. “Oh, right, of course! I was _going_ to buy it for Mom and Dad’s wedding anniversary, but Isabella and I got into a whole discussion after I came home with it because I paid a hundred and fifty dollars for it and she thought I got swindled, and over the course of the argument I tripped and dropped the clock, it got damaged, and in the end we figured that we couldn’t give it to my parents as a present anymore so we bought something else instead. Well, that’s just another minor difference between dimensions for you.”

The story sounded vaguely familiar, and it took me just a few seconds to place it – I remembered going with Phineas to the store, him being willing to pay two hundred dollars for what the salesman declared was a ‘genuine antique’ (the ‘Made in China’ mark being cleverly hidden) until I managed to point out the item’s flaws and get the price down to fifty bucks instead. Indeed, I realized that Phineas might well have originally considered going alone in our world too, but I had come along because I knew someone would take advantage of his good faith in people. Isabella had apparently either been too busy or too oblivious to go along with him here, and as a result Phineas had been ripped off.

I could, of course, have gloated about how this was another sign of how I was better for him than Isabella, but because I am – well, I try to be – a modest and dignified person (and because it really wasn’t helpful to antagonize Phineas at this stage by banging on about Isabella and using an anecdote which painted him in such an unfavorable light) I didn’t do any of that. “There is something else we need to talk about, Phineas,” I said, “something more important. I want to know what your plans are to get me home.”

Phineas left his papers on the desk and turned around fully to look at me in surprise. “Well, I was thinking that maybe we could head over to SHED next and get to work on building a device fit for receiving mental probes” he replied. “I’ve already made a list and ordered some of the things I believe we’ll need – you can have a look at it if you want to check if I missed anything.” He shoved the paper over the table, and I had to smile at the use of complicated terms I’d only grown familiar with due to years of interaction with them. Now this was Phineas again. “Of course, your world’s me is going to have to do the lion’s share of the work. I’m too out of practice to trust myself with that, plus he already has all of the equipment. Have you felt him or your other self getting into contact with you yet?”

I shook my head. “I haven’t felt anything – it’s very frustrating. Especially on top of everything else that happened this morning.”

Phineas frowned. “What do you mean?”

I sighed. “Isabella and I… had an argument. I can’t help but think that she doesn’t like me – and given some of the things I had to say to her, I suppose that’s understandable.”

My brother gave me a long-suffering look. “What, exactly, did you tell her?”

“I tried to tell her to give you some space every once in a while” I replied. “That she should understand that the things she wanted you to be and who you really are don’t always match up,” rarely if ever match up, “and that maybe she fell in love with the guy she wanted you to be, rather than the amazing person you are.”

Phineas looked at me and chuckled in the way a person does when he’s well aware of someone else’s quirks and opinions and can’t even get worked up about them anymore. “Is it that difficult to leave well enough alone, sis?”

My face reddened. “Well, she did come to me” I pointed out. “And she raised the subject of your relationship and how that related to how she’d treated me yesterday. I had to respond in some way, and I’m allowed to set out how I feel, aren’t I?”

Phineas nodded with a sigh. “I hope you didn’t tell her anything about where you are from or something that suggested that you thought your other self and I should be together?”

I shook my head. “Of course not, I’m not an idiot. And,” I added, realizing just a little too late that I had given the wrong answer, “I _don’t_ think that. I might have said you should be with my counterpart in the heat of the moment earlier, but I don’t really mean that. I don’t want to interfere with your choice.”

My deception – perhaps self-deception to a certain extent – couldn’t be more obvious if I tried, and even to Phineas it was crystal clear. He gave me an even-longer-suffering look and gestured for me to sit down. “Have you figured out why this is so important to you yet, and how it relates to the insecurity you discussed with me yesterday?”

I didn’t like being put on the spot, but I had to admit that fair was fair. “I’ve… been thinking about that” I admitted. “I’ve been trying not to, but the thought won’t leave my mind. I… well, I look at this reality and your relationship with Isabella – and mine with Jeremy, of course – and it just feels wrong, and part of that is honest concern and I’m sure of that, but maybe some part of it is because I worry that in my world, my real reason to get together with Phineas is that I’d be all alone otherwise, but now I know I wouldn’t have been all alone, and it’s making me questioning things and I don’t want to start questioning things because of that because I want to believe I got together with him because I love him, and I do, but he _is_ my brother and that matters to me even now, and I can’t help but wonder whether I only took that taboo threshold, the choice to go into a life of hiding, the choice to view the brother I loved platonically for his kindness as someone whom I wanted to spend the rest of my life with in a romantic way, because I thought that otherwise I would end up an old spinster.”

Phineas was quiet for a few moments at that confession. “Well, those are difficult questions, and I can understand why you’re grappling with them. I suppose the best way to tackle them is to really allow yourself to analyze what you feel for your brother. Why did you fall in love with him? Your relationship might sound weird for me, but there has to be a reason you two got together… even after all the effort you went through to try to bust me and Ferb.” He smiled, but it wasn’t an entirely painless smile.

I shook my head, beginning to grin despite myself. “Actually, I’ve sometimes wondered whether the reason I fell for you wasn’t the same for which I’ve always tried to bust you.”

Phineas stared at me. “What?”

“It’s very simple” I asserted. “All my teenaged life I’ve wanted two things – the love and pleasure I got from dating Jeremy, and being able to control you… let me rephrase that. Being able to keep an eye on you, to know what you were up to, to feel… I don’t know. I always thought you annoyed me, but the truth was that you… well, you fascinated me. I don’t even fully know why, not to this day, but that was the way it was.”

“What about Ferb?” Phineas replied, sounding entirely serious now.

I hesitated. “Ferb.. mattered… to me, in that I could never figure him out either. But most of the time he was just a sideshow, included in my busting because you two were always together, but you were the one it was all about. When I needed help, I always yelled your name and not his. I… I needed you in my life, in a more prominent way than most people would need their siblings. And I think the thing is that those two things, wanting to be with Jeremy and keeping you in my sight, always tore at me. What makes more sense than combining the two, so that by dating you I’d get that love and attention I wanted and never have to worry about you escaping me again?”

Phineas blinked. “Candace, you must be the only one to whom that makes any sense.” He shook his head. “But never mind, that does kind of tie in to what I wanted to ask you. Do you have genuine feelings for your Phineas? Romantic feelings, sexual feelings, et cetera? Feelings that you know can’t be sibling-like in any way?”

I frowned. “What do you mean? Isn’t that exactly what I’ve been telling you?”

“No, Candace,” my brother replied, shaking his head with a stern expression on his face, “not in the way I’m asking you now. You may love your brother on the surface, but if you really want to find out whether your self-doubts are valid you need to love him deep down, too. Do you have those feelings, feelings that you know you didn’t make up to deceive yourself?” Phineas paused, and shook his head again when I moved to reply. He gave me a gentle smile and put his hand on my shoulder.  “Don’t say anything right away. Just… wait. Concentrate. Think. And _then_ tell me what you’ve come up with.”

He was being bold and introspective here, but I acknowledged the fact that he was probably right. I did need to go that deep, and for all my confused feelings about him Phineas – regardless of the fact that this was not the exact Phineas that I knew – was the only one I trusted to go that deep with me. To go that deep _within_ me.

I thought about it for a while, longer than I might have wanted to, but the answer was satisfactory and one I knew was not influenced by outside interests. “Yes. Yes, I do.”

Part of me had expected that Phineas would be disappointed, because he _was_ committed to a relationship with Isabella and not me… but all I saw on my brother’s face was a smile. “Then you have nothing to worry about” he replied simply. “You know you have feelings for him, you know he loves you, and you know that if you didn’t love him you wouldn’t be so terrified of the opposite case. You also know that if he didn’t love you, you wouldn’t be so convinced that he is doing most of the work to bring you back despite the fact that we don’t even know whether your counterpart has told him what happened yet. I think that’s enough evidence to prove that even if you had known at the time that there were worlds out there in which alternatives existed, your teenage self would still have chosen my counterpart.”

I nodded, feeling a weight slip off my chest for reasons I couldn’t even explain. “But you and Isabella…”

“We have our problems” Phineas admitted. “I love her, and I wholeheartedly want to believe that my choice to get together with her was the right one, but I can’t be sure of that. But regardless of what _we_ chose to do, you made your own decisions, Candace. We are different people in different environments. You don’t have to let yourself be guided by the decisions we made, just like we don’t have to let the decisions you made affect our lives. Would you have started to question your relationship with your brother if this hadn’t happened?”

“Well, no,” I replied, “but…”

“But nothing. It’s fine, Candace. You’ll be fine. And maybe you’ll always be insecure, no matter how many times you talk to me or your own Phineas about this. And that’s fine too. Insecurity is okay as long as you don’t let it guide you, and as long as you know when to let go of your stress and emotions and just to relax.”

In the midst of the grand narrative he was telling to me I simply had to smile. “When did you become so… so deep?”

Phineas chuckled. “Well, didn’t you tell me earlier you’d had a couple of soul-searching conversations with your world’s version of me as well? Maybe that’s a trait we both developed out of necessity after getting into relationships. Anything to get our significant others to calm down and accept the world around her.”

“Even though for you and Isabella…” I began, before cutting myself off. I didn’t need to bash my alternate brother’s relationship. Not just because he didn’t want me to and it was really impolite to keep ignoring his wishes like that, but the compulsion I’d felt earlier about making those kind-of-snide remarks had decreased (even if it hadn’t quite vanished altogether). As Phineas gave me an inquisitive look, I smiled at him. “I know, I know. I’ll shut up. Are we going to SHED now?”

My brother smiled in return. “That _was_ what I had in mind” he quipped. “And that, too, is going to be fine. You’ll just have to wait and see, Candace. Trust me.”

From anyone else, I think I would have just shrugged that off because I had heard far too many empty promises before in my life. But from Phineas – especially since it didn’t involve an actual date, which he had stood me up on once or twice a long time ago because he had gotten distracted – it was somehow different. I knew that if my brother said things were going to be fine for me, he would move heaven and earth to make that indeed the case.

It would work. It would work, and I would be able to get out of here and go home. Perhaps I would only have to stay in this dimension for a few more hours.

Of course, as it turned out, it didn’t _quite_ work out that way.


	15. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And behold, a less long author's note combined with the final climax of AYA Candace's arc in the FLS-world. Even if she doesn't realize it at first. Warning: this gets harsh fast.

**_ Chapter Fourteen _ **

Saturday, July 3rd 2037  
8:25 PM    
Danville  
FLS-Verse

After our conversation on the afternoon of the eleventh and Baljeet joining the project in earnest I had genuinely hoped that we would now begin to see some serious progress. I didn’t know why I kept having my hopes so high only for them to be dashed, but I did know that I had to stop because it was just beginning to frustrate me. For Saturday afternoon at five, over twenty-four hours after my conversation with Phineas about bowling, he and Baljeet still hadn’t been able to get me home. Which meant that bowling in order to connect with members of my non-family, no matter if I liked it or not, would be a thing. I could hardly wait.

That last sentence was meant sarcastically, by the way.

I considered hanging out with the kids that night, mostly because I still couldn’t trust Phineas. In fact, my ability to understand his motives was lower than ever (which was admittedly in part due to my sheer frustration with his apparent inability to get me home.) However, the problem with hanging out with Amanda and Xavier was that they wouldn’t be much better people to talk to. Amanda wasn’t really my Amanda, even if I mostly ignored that fact to make talking to her easier, and there was still something that felt unnatural about the sheer existence of this Xavier, not to mention that I didn’t want to revisit the conversation we had the other day. (That kid was far too clever for his own good.) So that meant it would be every man and every woman for him- or herself.

Before we left Flynn-Fletcher Incorporated, we’d made a final try to get through to the other dimension. Again, headaches ( _bad_ headaches) were the only result. I still couldn’t wrap my head around the idea that someone as brilliant as my brother undoubtedly is couldn’t get me home. There had to be a reason.

Dinner was short – I supposed that in a world where all food was healthy, the ‘we’ll get some snacks when we go out so we won’t have to bother with dinner’ idea is even stronger than it would have been in our world. We rode to the bowling center in Phineas’ car, and the tension was palpable. Phineas tried to start a conversation a few times, but they all petered out.

The Bowl-R-Ama was on the same spot as I knew it to be back home, so it was a rare moment of familiarity. On the other hand, the fact that I’d been here so many times with Jeremy and the kids made the fact that I was supposed to bond with Phineas here even more difficult. I sighed and duly put on my bowling shoes as we got started. I managed to return Phineas’ awkward smiles one time, but the sheer relief I saw on his face then made me wonder what I’d wrought and I resolved not to do it again.

The game itself was something I enjoyed even though my heart wasn’t in it. I actually like bowling, that one time when Phineas and Ferb put me into a ten-foot bowling ball and sent me on a crazy ride throughout Danville aside. Hurling a heavy ball at a couple of pins has always been a great way to vent off aggression to me, and I’ve always been good at it. You see, in my view bowling is about two things: strength and focus. You have to put force behind the throw so that it won’t run out of steam before it hits the target, and you have to focus exactly on the spot you want to reach. It sounds simple, but it’s harder than it looks.

For some time, I actually managed to relax. I managed to get a couple of strikes in, and so did Amanda, leading to us actually getting a semi-serious competition going. We got ahead of Phineas and Xavier relatively easily and soon disregarded them, focusing on each other. I… I liked that. It brought out my competitive streak, it made me feel like I was accomplishing something, and above all, it made me feel like I was having fun. I hadn’t expected to feel like that tonight.

After about six rounds, Amanda had a couple of bad narrow misses, which allowed me to get ahead to the point where I could see on my daughter’s face that she was acknowledging the fact that she was headed for defeat. I threw another spare and then sat down next to her with a grin. “You know, it’s not all bad” I said. “You could still win.”

Amanda snorted. “Yeah, right. We only have two more rounds to go and you’re nineteen points ahead of me now.” She glanced over my shoulder and frowned. “There’s no way I would be able to catch up.”

On an impulse, I ruffled her hair – it was so hard to remember she wasn’t my daughter sometimes. “Maybe. But hasn’t my brother or my counterpart taught you anything about never giving up?”

“They have” Amanda acknowledged. “But that doesn’t mean that you can’t still acknowledge it when you know you’re beaten. I’m still going to try in the last rounds, but I know you’ll win.”

“I guess so” I acknowledged. “But it’s good to hear you’re still trying. It won’t be as satisfying to beat you if you’re not even trying.” I smirked and reached for the plate on the table, only to find out that the small snacks that had been on there earlier were gone. “I’m going to get us some more to eat from the bar” I told my daughter, standing up. “You can mull over how to beat me next time while I’m gone.”

Amanda hesitated and suddenly looked worried. “I… don’t know. I’m not sure whether that’s a good idea. Why don’t I get it for you?”

Well, that was about as suspicious as it could get. I narrowed my eyes. “Is something wrong, Amanda?”

“I’m fine!” Amanda replied, and I could tell how much she was like her father in that her attempts to lie weren’t able to fool anyone. “I’m perfectly fine. I’ll just go get the snacks, you chat with Xavier a little and I’ll be back in a moment. You’ll be able to keep her from getting bored, won’t you Xave?”

As my counterpart’s son hurriedly confirmed that, my attention had long passed to trying to figure out what Amanda was so worried about. I threw a look over my shoulder, scanning the room. At first, I couldn’t see anything unusual in it, until I took a closer look at the families that had joined us in the bowling hall, and my heart suddenly skipped a beat.

Jeremy.

His clothes and hair were different from what I was used to, but the moment I spotted him on the other side of the hall I knew it was him. Before I even realized what I was doing I stood up and rushed towards him. Oddly enough Vanessa was by his side, and there was a boy with them as well which closely resembled Jeremy as a teen. The implications were obvious and I felt a burst of jealousy in my heart that made me even less eager to stay back. Finding myself at his table with his and his company’s eyes focused on me, I took a deep breath. “Jeremy?”

He looked up at me and actually looked confused for a moment before he smiled. “Candace? Hi! How are you?”

It was so uncomfortable to realize that he hadn’t seen me in a long time because of all that had gone wrong in this world. “I’m… all right” I replied, deliberately sitting down between him and Vanessa, who gave me a curious look. It was strange that she didn’t show any signs of suspicion yet – after all, Jeremy and I had dated in the past, so I could very well be here to take him back (not that I was going to do that, this wasn’t even my dimension and my body after all, I was just going to talk to him because I needed to do so).  Perhaps after so many years of having him she’d managed to grow complacent. I gave Jeremy my sweetest smile. “How are you? I feel like I haven’t talked to you in far too long.”

Jeremy gave me an odd look and tried to look past me towards Vanessa, so I deliberately positioned myself in his line of sight. Something told me I should probably tone it down at least a little, but I couldn’t help myself. “I’m fine” he replied. “Work is going all right, I’m healthy, Nessa is healthy… you know, the usual. It’s a busy life. It gets a little boring sometimes, but there’s never nothing to do. And Johnny is actually of High School-going age now, so that’s new.”

“It’s Jonathan, Dad” the boy in question commented wryly.

“And he’s going through puberty” Jeremy continued unperturbed. “At least we seem to have been spared the worst of that until now. Remember when we were that age?”

I nodded, wondering how to pursue the conversation for a moment. I certainly didn’t want to ask him more about his current ‘family life’ that excluded me. Maybe reminiscing about the time during which everything had been all right even in this world would be a good option. “Yeah, you’re right” I agreed. “We were still in a relationship then, weren’t we?”

“If I recall correctly, around the time I was Jonathan’s age, you were trying to ask me out without revealing that you had a crush on me” Jeremy replied with a smile. “It took me a long time to realize that, though, especially considering how often you would break off our dates to run off to bust your brothers.” I blushed at the memory, but nevertheless felt relaxed for a moment. “I really liked you then, too – I don’t think either of us had even met Vanessa yet. Right?”

I reluctantly turned to look at my one-time friend, who nodded. “Yeah, I’m pretty sure I was still dating all over the place at the time. I don’t think I became friends with Candace until later, and I only met you when you came over to teach my Dad those guitar lessons.” She turned to me. “Are you all right, Candace? You don’t look so good.”

“I’m fine” I dismissed her. The last thing I wanted was her sympathy. I turned back to Jeremy. “Those were the days, weren’t they? I can’t even remember why we broke up. I don’t think I ever really wanted to.” That was the truth – I never would want to break up with Jeremy, and I couldn’t imagine that my counterpart would if she had even a shred of regular Candace Flynn in her. Although the alternative would be to blame Jeremy for everything… maybe Phineas had conspired against us because of his crush on me. That was entirely possible.

Jeremy sighed. “I know, Candace. And it _was_ my decision. I just didn’t think we could date through college anymore. Of course, given the fact that I later ended up doing just that with Vanessa, that wouldn’t have been everything… well, I guess we just weren’t entirely compatible as a couple. And you were still too distracted by your brothers at the time, so…” He shrugged. “Oh well. It’s all in the past now.”

The story shot a pang through my heart. “I… I know” I replied. “But it doesn’t have to be, right?” At the alarmed look Jeremy gave me, I felt compelled to elaborate. “I mean, obviously you’re with Vanessa now and everything, but that doesn’t mean you and I can’t still be close, right? I haven’t seen you in far too long, and… well, I missed you. I’m all alone right now, you know.” I swear I wasn’t trying to leak that seductiveness into my tone, it just happened. I wasn’t even sure what I was up to, really. Flirting with a man in front of his wife was something I never would have done if I had stopped to pause and think what I was doing.

That was why I didn’t.

What was the point of all this? Was it because I wanted to help my counterpart find a way back to closeness with the guy she was supposed to have been with? Was it because I felt that I couldn’t get home and was trying to fight my way back to my husband’s counterpart? I didn’t really know, nor did I get the chance to think about it. Vanessa took a deep breath behind me. “What exactly are you saying, Candace?”

“Nothing special” I replied innocently. “I’m just trying to rebuild an old… friendship. There’s nothing wrong with that, is there?”

“It’s our family bowling night.” I did not miss the subtle emphasis on the word ‘family’.

“If you want me to leave, shouldn’t Jeremy be the judge of that?” I retorted. “He’s the one I’m talking to, after all.”

“I never said that I wanted you to leave, Candace.”

“You certainly implied it.”

“Maybe it _would_ be better, sis” a fourth voice cut in. I looked up to see Phineas. He was looking closely at me and at the way I had slid in so close to Jeremy that I could hear his breathing – and if I’d paid more attention, I would have noticed that it was getting uncomfortable. “We wouldn’t want to be a bother and disturb Jeremy and Vanessa.”

My eyes narrowed. “ ** _You_** don’t want to disturb anyone?” I whispered angrily. “It’s a little late for _that_ , don’t you think?”

Phineas looked caught off-guard… and he probably had a right to be, considering that I hadn’t lashed out at him before like that. But this feeling of resentment had been boiling up inside me for too long, and I needed to get it out. And there was no way I was going to let him interfere with my reunion with Jeremy, not when I knew exactly what kind of motives he had hidden up his sleeve.

And then he made it even worse.

My counterpart’s brother put a hand on my shoulder and gave me a gentle smile. “Candace, please calm down. I know you’re upset and why you’re upset, but…”

Under ordinary circumstances, that method might have worked, but these were no ordinary circumstances and Phineas trying to comfort me only made things worse. “Then leave me alone!” I snapped. I stood up and glared at him. “I know you miss… the one you lost, but I’m _not her_!”

Phineas looked shocked. “Candace, I never wanted to… I never meant to imply…”

“Then you’ve been doing a terrible job at that for the past three days!” I snapped. “I’ve seen the way you looked at me during dinner, at your lab, when watching a movie with the kids, pretty much everywhere! Do you really think I’m blind, Phineas? Do you really think I can’t see it when you’re trying to project your feelings for her onto me? I can’t believe you’d ever do that, but apparently I’ve never really known you if you and her somehow got together regardless of all moral conventions, and now you’re trying to imagine I’m her and you don’t even care anymore about the woman you lost! That is sick, Phineas, and you are apparently capable of sicker behavior than I could ever imagine you to be! Is this what your entire life has to revolve around? Terrorizing, traumatizing and _disgusting_ me? Because if that’s the case, _then_ from the day you were born, you have been doing an _excellent_ job!”

The room fell silent. Phineas rapidly blinked as he stared at me, a tear rolling across his cheek. Amanda and Xavier just gawked. I turned away from them and focused on Jeremy. My Jeremy. My beloved, dear Jeremy…

…who was staring as well. And I think that only then it sunk in what I’d just said. That I had all but spilled out all these things the other Phineas and Candace had been trying to keep a secret for years in front of an audience of people who used to know them. And although I hadn’t said enough to make what was happening clear, it was enough for Jeremy to stare at me like I was crazy and for Vanessa to wrap an arm around her son’s shoulders.

They were… scared of me. They were distinctly uncomfortable. I’d created a scene, and although of course there had been good reasons… well, I had still freaked out.

I didn’t know what to think, whether to feel guilty or sorry or anything like that, but I just felt so drained. I needed to go home, I wanted to go home so badly, and no one was helping me in any way. They didn’t care. No one did.

I felt a sudden urge to be alone, even if it was just to get away from all those judgmental looks that I became aware were being cast at me as I stood there – and as justified as I felt about many of the things that I had said and done, being stared at in public was never fun. I paced past my brother (who was still staring at me, can you believe that, and part of it tugged at my heartstrings because it didn’t look like he was intending anything creepy with it anymore, he was just horrified and his cheeks were wet in the spotlights of the bowling alley) and past the kids onto where I knew the toilets to be. Behind me, I could feel the buzz of conversation slowly being picked up again and I knew Phineas would have to explain everything I’d said to Jeremy and his family, hopefully without having to reveal the big truth. Maybe he’d get away with it by saying that I was crazy. I didn’t particularly care about the outcome of that talk anyway. All I wanted to do now was sit there and be alone.

I sat there, huddled in front of the toilet in the ladies’ bathroom, for a long time. Although I was outwardly silent, I was screaming inside. All the frustration of the past days was being released, and I was left with the question of whether I would ever see home again. Whether the intention had ever been that I would get to see home again. I couldn’t do this on my own, so if I had no one else to resort to but Phineas… I sighed, and eventually I quietly began to sob.

It felt like both a few seconds and a matter of hours until the door to the bathroom squeaked open. I kept my eyes focused on the ground until a familiar voice spoke up. “Aunt Candace?”

I looked up. It was Amanda, which was come to think of it the most logical choice as this was a girl’s bathroom and I was not ready to see either of the boys of the family right now. “Hello, Mandy” I said politely, and then corrected myself. “I’m sorry. Amanda. You want to be called Amanda, right?”

Amanda knelt down and nodded. “Yeah… but that’s really no big deal. I just talked to Jonathan about it and he told me he was going through the same thing with his parents because they still call him Johnny half the time. I guess it really is something parents do, clinging onto kiddy nicknames for their teenagers without meaning anything with that. I suppose I’d known before that I’m not the only one, but I don’t think I ever realized it until now… anyway, it’s not important. _That_ is hardly something you should concern yourself with.”

“Who’s Jonathan?” I asked, her words only slowly getting through to me.

“Mr. Johnson’s son” Amanda explained. “He’s really nice once you get to know him.” I had barely any time to wonder whether this was meant as an admonition for me riding roughshod over Jeremy’s alternate family because they were not what I thought they were supposed to be until she proceeded. “Xavier and I agreed that we should talk to you and to Dad, so we discussed it and decided to split up. He’d go to Dad, and I would try to talk to you after giving you some time to cool down so that you would be more receptive. We didn’t know too well how you’d react to what just happened and to what we had to say since essentially, we’ve only known you for a couple of days now, but we figured it’d go easier with a face you were comfortable with, and anyway, there were some things I needed to say to you that I wasn’t sure Xave would get across.”

I couldn’t help but grin. She was sharp, at least as sharp as the girl I was familiar with – or at least, Amanda would be sharp if she didn’t waste so much of her time trying to get her brothers to do something. It was just so tiring to have to hear to the same story all the time of how Xavier and Fred weren’t doing anything, and they were wasting their time, and somehow I should be the one to do something about that. I’d told Amanda so many times that she should give it a rest, that her brothers would eventually find something more entertaining in life than sitting around under a digital tree, but nooo, Amanda Johnson would not have that. She’d get her brothers to work if it was the last thing she’d do.

But enough about my home life, that really wasn’t the issue right now (I suppressed the fear of never getting back to it as quickly as it had come.) “You’re probably right” I told Amanda. “You look so much like my daughter, it’s hard to remember that you aren’t her.” I briefly entertained the notion of getting to her to act more like my Mandy for the remaining time I was stuck here until I caught the look in her eyes and figured that suggesting that at this moment was not the best idea. (It was probably a bit sketchy morally to try to get this girl to be the same person as my Amanda anyway.) She was not here to talk about playing dress-up; in all likelihood, she’d come to berate me on making such a scene in front of Jeremy. In a corner of my mind I knew she was right about that… but for crying out loud, here was my husband, looking every bit like the person I’d gone to bed with just three nights ago (I’d been here for three days. Astounding.) and sitting with Vanessa Doofenshmirtz. What else was I supposed to have done?

Amanda looked up at me. “Look, Aunt Candace…” She hesitated, either not sure what to say or how to put it. “Aunt Candace, I’m sure you won’t like to hear what I’m saying, but you need to apologize to Dad.”

That was not what I’d expected to hear, and to be honest it struck me in the face a little. Sure, I’d seen the way Phineas had looked at me, and I did feel a bit sorry for causing such a mess… but what could he expect from me, I was faced by the most tangible reminder of my old life I’d had in days! I said as much to Amanda, who grimly shook her head.

“That’s hardly the point” she said firmly. “You hurt Dad’s feelings, Aunt Candace. _Severely_. And I don’t know how well you know him or how different he is in your world, but he _is_ your brother so I don’t think it’s a surprise when I say that hurting Dad’s feelings is not an easy thing to do.”

“You’re right,” I conceded, thinking back over the past ten or fifteen years. He had seemed easier to anger or at least to upset after his marriage, but in essence he was still the same upbeat, optimistic spirit I’d always known him as. For him to have to hold back tears just wasn’t like him. Maybe that was the reason I hadn’t taken it seriously (besides my own problems, of course) – that I just couldn’t see it as real.

But the thing of it was that in this dimension, it _was_ real. And maybe – just maybe – I hadn’t been taking the _reality_ of this other reality serious enough in my condemnation of both my brother and his love affair with his sister.

I sighed and leaned against the wall, wondering how all this had gotten so incredibly complicated. I mean, it was a reality in which my brother was committing incest with another version of me. At the risk of sounding repetitive, that’s just wrong. Shouldn’t it be clear that I was the one in the right here, and that they were wrong? And yet, they refused to accept it. That is to say, Phineas appeared to be well aware that he was doing something questionable, and his kids knew it too, but they were not horrified by it or told him to stop. It was just a fact of life here, and that was the most bizarre thing of all.

I noticed that Amanda was looking at me with a strange and impatient expression on her face and decided to elaborate. “I probably shouldn’t have been so harsh with your father. He’s done a lot of things wrong, but I suppose this case just wasn’t one of them, and I messed up there. Some of the things I said…” I briefly considered just how cruel those words had been, and then I shook my head. “Look, I’ll shut up about Jeremy and about your parents’ relationship, okay? I’ll try to be more constructive from now on. You can tell your Dad that I didn’t mean it that way, and I… I’ll consider apologizing to him in person before I get back home.” I would probably have some difficulty spitting out a sorry to this version of Phineas, but if it had to be done to keep Amanda happy and to ease my own conscience I could probably manage it. Just not yet. I leaned forwards and put pressure on my arms in order to get my legs upright again, feeling ready (well, readier) to confront the outside world.

I’d intended to stand up, and I was anticipating that I would stand up. What I was not anticipating was my counterpart’s daughter grabbing my arms and forcing me back down. The blank look in her eyes had been replaced by a chilling stare.

“No” she repeated, speaking slowly as if she was addressing a child. “No, you will not ‘consider it’. You are _going_ to apologize, and you’re going to do so before you’ve left this building.”

I was too taken aback to speak up. This was Amanda, my Amanda, and she was talking to me as if I was a monster. Her tone was different from what it was before, but it had been a little detached then, and the thought occurred to me that she had probably saved her full rant until it became clear that I wasn’t going to say anymore. Of course, I did not ask her about that – I was too perturbed to do anything but to stammer a confused “excuse me?” 

“I know there are things in our home and in our family that have disturbed you over the last couple of days, Aunt Candace” Amanda continued, softer but clearly unshaken. “Xavier and I aren’t blind. We know you don’t approve and why – you’d hardly be the only one. Everyone has had their doubts in this family, even Dad. I don’t care if you think Mom and Dad are freaks, and I don’t care if you think Xavier and I are freaks for being born out of their relationship. But I do care about my father. He is the nicest, sweetest, coolest, best father I ever could have wished for, and tonight you upset him deeply. You literally told him that he had been trying to traumatize you from the day he was born. Do you have any idea what that did to him? To hear those words come from someone he loves – yes, loves, because you are still a version of his sister, lest you’ve forgotten. You hurt him, and that is not okay. You do **_not_** hurt my father.” She took a breath, allowing me a bare moment’s respite to digest her words. “And maybe your apology won’t be sincere, but you have to give it to make it up to him after what you’ve done.” She shook her head. “You know what? I’d seen how tense you were, and I heard about your talk with Xavier, but I really thought you were better than this. And no matter what you may think about what my mother has done, you should know this: she would never have sunk this low.”

I wanted to say something to that, but I could think of nothing that would refute any of the things my alternate daughter had said. Before I could even begin to formulate some sort of reply, however, Amanda stood up and held out her hand. “Are you coming?” she asked me.

I suppose that if I wanted to, I could have waited a little longer. I was not particularly in the mood to resist. I stood up, wobbly, and took Amanda’s hand as she lead me out to her father. It was not going to be an easy conversation, but I knew it was a conversation that would have to be had. Amanda’s rant had made one thing clear enough – the Flynn family had reached the limits of their tolerance of my behavior, and unless I would alter it very quickly, they would shut me out permanently.

And for some reason, that bothered me a lot more than I had originally thought it would.


	16. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> An update, at last! We're almost at the end here. This one features AYA Phineas trying to help bring Candace home, something which still doesn't quite work out... or does it? Many thanks to http://archiveofourown.org/users/jonasy15/pseuds/jonasy15 for giving me advice on how to write the technobabble at the start of the chapter, for helping me with the inter-Candacian monologue in the next chapter and for being a great conversationalist in general. I heartily recommend the stories (well, story for now, at least on this site) that jonasy15 wrote to anyone, because it's really well-written and detailed, and it showcases a very good understanding of the characters we all know and love.
> 
> EDIT: Would you believe that after having been a member of this site for four years now, I still haven't figured out how to link to other pages? I mean, it is definitely something that should be possible, right?

**_ Chapter Fifteen _ **

Friday, July 2nd 2037  
11:00 AM    
Danville  
AYA-Verse

When Phineas and I first departed to go to SHED, my spirits had been fairly high – or at least, higher than they had been in a long time. That did not last very long.

I had hoped, perhaps naively, that Phineas’ lack of knowledge of inventing would be fixed pretty easily once he just got back to work. And yet, from the moment we entered SHED, I realized that it would take a lot longer than I’d hoped. Phineas walked ahead, eagerly exploring everything and pulling up old memories with an almost childish enthusiasm, but he had difficulty deciding what parts to use for the new mind transmitter (well, mind transmission receiver technically – some sort of sentience projection recipient? That sounded fancy enough.) Anyway, several times in a row I saw Phineas take two similar looking (but vastly different) parts into his hands, only to stop and ponder which of those he would use. He always chose the right part in the end (in as far as I knew which one was right, of course) but the way he kept dithering was working on my nerves. I could trust him, right? Of course I could. He was just taking a little longer than he usually was, having to blow through the dust webs in his brain and get his inventing skills back in gear… but from the looks of recognition and confidence on his face, the way he would proceed and never look back once he had actually made his choices and the fact that overall the machinery looked very familiar to me I was able to remain upbeat about the whole situation. It’d be fine. What was there to be worried about?

My attitude changed, however, when I saw what he was doing with the stereopticon. The device was about halfway through at that point and we hadn’t had any major mishaps, but this was about to become one if I didn’t speak up. It was at that point that I really began to realize that unless I did something to help him, the mind transmitter wasn’t going to get finished. It was an odd thought – sure, I had offered to help Phineas before when he had said he wasn’t experienced enough to build inventions like he used to, but I had always considered that to be hyperbole. I mean, sure. _Phineas_ not being able to invent. I’d just have to lead him back to SHED, and he would take to it like a fish to water. And this was only going to be a receiver, and thus hardly the most complicated thing he’d ever built – it didn’t even require pizzazium infinionite, for crying out loud, and my own brothers seemed to put that stuff into _anything_ they built these days. (I was still waiting for the day when Phineas would serve it to me for breakfast.)

But even though my counterpart’s brother’s level of enthusiasm was high, his output was not. I stepped forwards and deftly switched the polarity of the stereopticon. “You knew that was needed, right?” I said, feeling as if I should explain my actions – which I kind of should, because I was barging straight into his work and changing something about it. “You needed to switch the polarity so that the stereopticon would receive rather than broadcast signals. I mean, I don’t know if the quantum fluxer will even fit into it otherwise.”

Phineas gave me a strange look. “You’re right” he mused softly. “I don’t know how I missed that.” He looked around the table. “Can you get the quantum fluxer for me? I don’t see it anywhere but I know I’ve seen it laying around before, so I think it must still be on the garbage heap somewhere. I’d go look for it myself, except it could take forever to find it in this mess and I’m a little preoccupied with putting together the omega ray deflectors right now. It’s sensitive equipment, you know.”

“I know, I know” I muttered, looking around to see he was right. The quantum fluxer was nowhere to be seen. Oh well – I could pick it up for him easily anyway, and I figured it would give me something to do other than hanging around here while my brother did all the work. I walked over to the scrap pile, occasionally kicking a piece of machinery that was lying on the ground to see whether there was anything below it. Phineas was right – SHED had really become a mess over the years. It was incomparable with the state it was in back home, where it was much neater (although it was also a place Phineas hadn’t used in years because he had a lab of his own) which had disadvantages and benefits – disadvantages in the fact that it was a mess, we couldn’t find anything and we had to be cautious not to trip over dangerous materials all the time, but benefits in that SHED acted as a time capsule, with many parts being the same I remembered seeing Phineas use all those years ago…

“Aha!” I crouched down and triumphantly picked up the quantum fluxer, which had rolled into a corner. After blowing the dust off it and inspecting it to make sure it still looked functional, I twisted the edges like usual and folded insulating wire around it. I then turned to Phineas to hand it over, and saw my brother staring at me with a proud look on his face.

“You don’t have to look at me like that” I said sheepishly. “It was just muscle memory, nothing more. I’ve helped you once or twice, but above all I’ve seen you do this so many times over the years that it felt like second nature.”

Phineas shrugged, taking the quantum fluxer from me and attaching it to the stereopticon – the receiver was really taking shape now. “Perhaps. But even so, I was the one who had forgotten what to do, while you managed to remind me of it. And the quantum fluxer, too… I remember using it back in the day, and I know it should be a part of a device like this, but I can’t remember what it was for.” He thoughtfully scratched the back of his head and his ear.

“I… do remember, actually” I said with a blush. “That’s just because Phineas was rambling about it to me last week, though. It’s supposed to focus the energy output into the protective outer shell of our dimension, functioning as a basic antenna that can create a rift into non-dimensional space. Without the quantum fluxer, the energy would most likely just bounce around inside my mind and turn me into a puppy. You’d be surprised at how often removing a single component can make the difference between one thing…”

“..and a highly complicated totally unrelated other thing” Phineas finished in unison with me. “I remember that.” He wistfully stared at the wall in front of him, obviously caught up in a fond memory. It made me think of how strange it was that Phineas wouldn’t remember what the quantum fluxer was for, considering its significance in operating a device such as this one. However, he continued speaking before I could think anything of it. “I don’t think that kind of thing would ever happen with my Candace” he mused softly. “Even if she would remember some of the inventions Ferb and I built when we were kids, she wouldn’t be able to tell you how they were put together and why.”

“I’ve got to say that the ‘why’ still often leaves me stumped, even after all those years” I replied. “But I feel like I’ve gotten a lot closer to the ‘how’ after spending so much time with your counterpart. How about Isabella? Did she ever show an interest in inventing… you know, before you stopped?”

My brother shook his head. “I had already come out of my – stopped inventing before she and I got together.” He had caught himself in time, but I was certain that he had been planning to say inventing was a phase again. “There were one or two projects after that, but Isabella was never there when I was building them and I don’t really think she cared all that much. She was never very much into inventing – nor were you, for that matter. Ferb wasn’t really into inventing anymore at that point either, and to go on alone would have felt pretty silly.”

I nodded, trying not to press the issue too much. “I know you said you and Ferb went to different colleges, but was that the main reason he stopped inventing with you? Or was something else going on?”

Phineas frowned. “What do you mean?”

I shrugged. “I don’t know, it just feels odd to me – yes, on top of everything else – that you and Ferb grew apart like that. You’re still friends, of course, and brothers, but you lead such different lives in different places and I’m wondering how that happened. And don’t say that’s just something that happens when you grow up, Phineas,” I warned him with a light yet slightly serious tone in my voice. “At least here, you know my intentions are pure and I’m not about to divulge in another rant about whether or not you should be with Isabella.”

I think my honesty helped a lot in Phineas’ open response. He chuckled and sat down, his eyes glistering with what I presume was nostalgia. “I think it was a combination of many things… and yes, I do believe growing up was one of them” he replied. “Ferb getting that prestigious invitation to go to school in England. I mean, it is his home country and everything, and I can’t see him refusing that offer or me going away from Danville. Our different interests – sure, we’re both engineers, but we’re different from each other nonetheless. And then there was Isabella, and my memory of the offer from Clive Addison came at the right moment, when I had already more or less quit inventing but I hadn’t found a viable alternative yet. Addison gave me that, and I’ve always thought taking him up on his offer was one of the best decisions I’ve ever made. And you know what, Candace? I’ll admit to some curiosity about your world and the fact that your brother is still building to his heart’s content, but I still believe I have a home here in special effects. I love making movies, and the job pays well. I just wish it didn’t interfere with my home life so much.”

“You are sure you can take off enough time to do this, right?” I wondered.

“Oh, definitely” Phineas assured me. “My position in the company is strong enough for me to take off a few days, and it is an emergency. One that should hopefully not take too long.” He plugged in a final part and whizzed the receiver for the mental transmitter to life. The device looked very different from the one I’d seen in my own Phineas’ office (which was only, what, three days ago? Astonishing) but I suspected that it would probably work the way we wanted it to. I mean, it was still Phineas’ invention.

“So…” I said, eyeing the device in front of us. “Now what?”

“Now we should probably try it out” Phineas said with a grin. “Didn’t you say that back in the other dimension, my counterpart had a lab bunk to lie down on? We don’t have one around here, but for the first test a chair might suffice.”

I tried to ignore the implication that this test wouldn’t work anyway, that it was just a preliminary try, and put the helmet-thingy on. It really brought me back to that day such a short while ago, when I had been trying to help Phineas with his invention and I’d been so frustrated about it not working. How ironic. If only it hadn’t worked.

I could hear the buzzes from the control panel Phineas had constructed and felt an uneasy thumping sound in the back of my brain. It was okay, this was normal. I barely registered Phineas’ reminder that this machine was necessarily slightly different than the one I had first put on because this device could only receive signals and couldn’t actually make contact. Ergo, it was even more important for me to latch onto stray thoughts I could be picking up from another dimension.

I tried, of course. I tried as hard as I could. The chance of success was increasing my tenseness and my heart was thumping twice as fast as it normally did. Maybe it just needed one little push, and it would work. One more shove… I could feel Phineas increase the intensity, and I tried to immerse myself in the mental world, tried to feel it, but I just wasn’t getting through, it was like I was hitting a brick wall time and time again, and it hurt… it hurt…

Without any warning to Phineas, I yanked the equipment off my head. I knew that probably wasn’t the smartest move, but I didn’t care. I just couldn’t hold it any longer. Phineas rapidly deactivated the mind receiver and was at my side in a second. “Are you okay?”

“I’m… I’m fine” I replied, panting heavily. I tried to stand to show him how fine I was, but apparently he’d managed to assess my situation better than I could as I wobbled on my feet and needed his arm to support me. I tried to give him a reassuring smile. “It’ll be fine. Don’t worry. I just couldn’t do that anymore. It… it hurt too much.”

“That’s okay” Phineas replied, smiling encouragingly. “I don’t think you actually damaged anything, and we’ve had our first test. Would you say this was a similar experience to the one you went through in your own dimension?”

I nodded. “More or less. Except now that I know it works I’m even more frustrated with the fact that I wasn’t getting anywhere.”

Phineas smiled, helping me walk back to the lab bench. “It’ll be fine, Candace. We had our first try, it didn’t work, but there’s no reason to be depressed yet. It’ll work out in the end, I’m sure.”

As usual, his confidence was unshakeable and to a certain extent inspirational. I nodded as I watched him get back to work and add some ‘refinements’ to the transmitter. This time, he mostly worked without my help, although I did chime in to give my advice every now and then. After about an hour we tried again. And again. And again.

By the time the sun set and we were ready to head back to Phineas’ house, I could see the flashes of disappointment on my brother’s otherwise optimistic features even despite his determination to hide them. Therefore, it was not a complete shock when after finishing the final test, he turned to me and spoke aloud the words that I’d dreaded so much. “I think we’re going to have to call it a day.”

I couldn’t help myself. “WHY?!” I exclaimed, yanking the suction cups off my head again and throwing them across the workbench. “Are you seriously telling me that we’ve been here for almost a full day, and we have nothing to show for it except for a pounding headache? I don’t even think I’m going to be able to ‘call it a day’ tonight. More likely, I’ll just lie there counting sheep and gulping down aspirin, until the morning comes and I’ll be even more of a wreck than I am now!”

Phineas honestly looked a little frightened and upset at that. “Candace” he whispered. “I don’t have anything else I can do. I could cobble up something to help you sleep, but that’s all. I haven’t done this in decades, and I can’t help you go home today. I’m so sorry.”

I suddenly felt very guilty. I had no idea my words would upset him quite that much. “I know, Phineas” I whispered. “I wasn’t trying to lash out at _you_ , per se, I was just frustrated. I know you’re doing everything you can, more than I ever could’ve asked for, and don’t doubt for a moment that I appreciate every second. It’s just…” I looked into his eyes. “Do you have any idea what it feels like to be trapped in a different world  and to constantly have to be around the one person you love more than anything, but then you are periodically reminded – or you force yourself to remember – that _you_ are not _him_ , and that no matter how long I’ll be stuck here or how much I talk to you, you never will be?”

I got up, taking advantage of my brother’s silence in order to go outside. I tried to ignore the pounding headache, but ignoring hardly had any effect. The ache was too much, clouding all my senses to the point where there was nothing else left that I could think of.

Actually, that wasn’t true. There was something else that I could think of, something from which the headache was actually a welcome distraction.

“You miss him that much, huh?” 

I looked around and saw Local Phineas approaching. He gave me his customary soft, semi-melancholic smile and sat down on the swing set in the back of my… his parents’ yard. It had been erected next to SHED in our world as well, so that the grandkids would have something to play with. The grandkids were different here, but apparently the motivation and outcome had remained the same.

I realized that my brother’s counterpart expected an answer from me, and nodded. “You have no idea” I muttered honestly. Once I started it got easier to get the rest out, and I had already spilled so much just now anyway. “I’ve spent so much time arguing in his favor over the past days, and it’s really got me thinking about our relationship and I swear it’s actually gotten stronger. I’m sure that goes for his side, too. And I know I can’t convince you of the mental and logical case for ‘us’, but he’s my brother, my kids’ Dad, my bedrock of support and as sappy as it sounds, I can’t imagine my life without him. That was true even – maybe especially – during the heights of my busting phase.”

Phineas nodded. “I see. And now that you’re going through this pain, you want your husband there with you, to hold you and comfort you, and he isn’t here.”

I hesitated. “Well… yeah. I… I do miss having him there. Phineas is like those things that are always there and you don’t notice how much you need them until they’re gone. I want to embrace him and yell at him for his stupid inventions and hug him because they’re amazing anyway and kiss him and cuddle with him and I know I’m sounding like a total loon but I still need to tell you those things because now I could never get to do them again.”

There was an awkward pause, and then my brother’s counterpart uttered words I’d never have expected him to say. “You could kiss _me_ , if you want to.”

I had to blink and repeat the words in my head a couple of times to make sure I hadn’t misheard. “Excuse me?”

“Don’t get me wrong” Phineas hastened to reply. “This has nothing to do with how I view your counterpart, or Isabella. And I don’t want you to French kiss me or anything. But I saw how distressed you were, and you are my sister. It wouldn’t feel right to know I could make a small gesture that might make you feel better and then not do it, you know?”

I smiled, my opinion of Local Phineas going up a few notches. “Thank you. Thank you very much. I don’t know if it’ll make a difference, but I really appreciate the gesture.” I stared into his eyes, suddenly conscious of the short distance between us. “So, how do you want me to do this?”

Phineas shrugged. “However you want to. You’re the expert here.”

I noticed the twinkle of nervous humor in his eye and impulsively grabbed his right hand, patting it a little in hopes of reassuring him. “Okay, close your eyes.”

Phineas did so and I pulled myself closer towards him, wrapping my arms around his shoulders so the swing set wouldn’t snap me back. Knowing that if I started over thinking this I’d never get it done I leaned in close, let instinct take over and kissed him.

The kiss was both familiar and unfamiliar – largely familiar of course, because he was still Phineas and I’d been making out with him for twenty years. But there was still the constant reminder that this wasn’t my brother (and it occurred to me that if I already felt guilty for kissing someone who was merely another version of my brother, Phineas had nothing to worry about with regard to me cheating on him) but above it all, it was pleasant. Comfortable. Hope-inspiring. I broke off the kiss after about fifteen seconds, hoping Phineas would see the experience more or less the same way. He _had_ kissed me back, so…

“That… was unexpected” my brother admitted. “Not bad, but… different.” He smiled. “Wow.”

“Better than Isabella?” I couldn’t help but tease.

“I’m not even going to dignify that with a response” Phineas replied on a tone that indicated both that there were no hard feelings but also that I shouldn’t press it any further if I wanted to keep it that way.

“Yeah, I figured as much” I replied. “I… thanks, Phineas. Thank you for doing this for me. At least now I’ve had this experience, even if I never…” I waited, and then tried again. “Even if I never got home again.” I looked up and touched my forehead. “I would still have this experience, even if I never managed to get home again.”

Phineas gave me a look. “Candace, what on earth are you doing?”

I sighed. “I’m trying to do that thing from the movies, like if you get lost in a jungle and you say ‘we might as well give up, we’ll never get home’, and right then you stumble across a settlement? I’m trying to replicate that, but it isn’t working!”

My brother chuckled and gave me a hand. “Come on, sis. Let’s go back to my house.”

I wanted to argue, but it was getting late and now more than ever I knew he had done everything he could for me. “Fine” I admitted, resigned. “Let’s go home.”

Nope. Still didn’t work.

We got back to the Flynn house at 12, and it truly was late. By this time, the sleep inducer my brother had managed to cobble together was up and functioning, and I took it to bed along with me. I bid my brother goodbye in the hallway, for the first time not anticipating what would be happening in his bedroom with any sort of dread. Not only did I feel now stronger than ever that this Phineas cared for me, but I also knew that Isabella would not be happy if he woke up and found her husband coming home at this hour. The way Phineas crept into his room as softly as possible indicated that I wasn’t the only one who had realized that.

The sleep inducer worked, as almost all of my brother’s inventions did, but it wasn’t flawless. After a couple of brief intervals in which I needed to induce myself again (which probably wasn’t a good thing to do but I was past caring at this point) I woke up at 10 AM after a couple of disorienting, hazy dreams which I could not recall at the time I got up. I went down the stairs and joined my brother at the breakfast table. It was evident that he had slept even worse than I had, and his mood was suffering over it.

Taking a few bites off my slice of bread, I noticed that Phineas wasn’t even looking at me. He was eating, sure, but he was chewing at a slow pace and his usual energy was absent. I sighed. “Phineas, is something wrong?”

My brother’s counterpart looked up. “What makes you say that?”

I shook my head. “I don’t think I need to tell you. You know I’ve lived with your counterpart for over two decades now, and you’re not so different that I can’t tell whether you’re upset or not. What happened?”

Phineas looked up at me. “Isabella and I had a fight.”

From the way he was staring at me, I could tell that he was anticipating whether or not I would smile in reaction to the news – and I have to admit, it was pretty hard to keep a somber posture. I contemplated offering my sympathies, but I worried that would only come off as too insincere, even if it wasn’t, not entirely. I might not have been really fond of this world’s Isabella, nor of her relationship with Phineas, but that didn’t mean I wanted to see them fighting anymore than I wanted that for the Isabella and Phineas of my own world. Instead, I decided to get to the heart of the matter. “I see” I replied softly. “Can I ask what it was about?”

Phineas hesitated for a few seconds, and it almost felt like he was deciding whether or not to trust me. “Isabella woke up when I came into our room last night” he said. “She was upset about the time, as I’d expected, but she was even more upset because of the way the two of us have been acting around each other the last day or so. She feels like _we_ made her feel that getting your issues sorted was an emergency, and it’s obviously not. She also told me she checked on you last night and she thought you were sleeping relatively well. And then she… she said that I should take her and our daughter out to a hotel tonight to show that I still cared about them. Danville Motel has been renovated with several new facilities and Isabella has been wanting to go there for a night for months now, and she believes that since I already took the week off and your problems are not that acute, that this would be the perfect opportunity for me to go with her and Vicky… and to prove that I loved her.”

That last part actually surprised me more than the fact that Isabella was deliberately (though unknowingly) sabotaging my return home by proposing to keep Phineas from his work for much of the weekend. “She actually questioned whether you loved her?”

Phineas flinched. “Well, it’s not like she doesn’t have any reason to do so” he replied. “Just look at the content of the conversations we’ve been having. Or my helping you out rather than focusing on her, for that matter. You’ve got to remember that she doesn’t know you’re from another dimension. And if you really just had sleeping problems, it would be rational for me to spend more time with my wife and daughter than I do with you.”

“You do realize you’re down to making excuses for her actions now” I said calmly.

Phineas shrugged. “Maybe. But sometimes excuses are necessary, Candace. Sure, Isabella doesn’t always do the right thing, and I guess she can even be selfish sometimes. But she means well, and you should realize that… you should _want_ to realize that.”

I remained silent, after which he eventually moved on to another subject. “I’ve been looking at the calculations I made yesterday and I think I’ve got a few possible revisions we can make to the mental transmitter” he said. “They should increase its efficiency and intensity. The counterpoint being, of course, that your headache will undoubtedly get worse.” He sighed. “I don’t get it. In theory, this should be much easier because we merely have to latch on to the brainwaves of your counterpart – after that, our other selves can do the rest and make the actual switch.”

“Maybe we just keep missing each other?” I suggested.

My brother nodded. “Possible, possible. I do have the feeling that we’re close to the solution… just not that we’re actually getting any closer.”

“Daddy?”

Phineas and I looked up at the entrance of his daughter, who was looking at him with a concerned expression. “Can I ask you something? I know you’re busy, and you and Mommy probably planned for this, but I can’t come along to the hotel trip tonight. Airen Tjinder and I are having a sleepover at her house. We’ve been planning it for over a week.”

Phineas froze. “Sweetie, who told you we were going to a hotel tonight?”

Vicky frowned. “Uh, Mom did? Well, I heard her talking to some man on the phone about making reservations? I’m sorry if that wasn’t something you wanted me to know…”

It was interesting to see Phineas get angry. As always with my brother, there was a strong sense of disappointment involved that overrode any aggressive feelings. He was upset, that much was clear, but he also seemed to be so… I don’t know, _tired_ of everything. That was probably the best word. No matter what positive things Phineas had to say about his marriage, it was clear that it was wearing him out.

Of course, I didn’t actually tell him that. I remained quiet and just watched as Phineas turned to his daughter. “Vicky, get your mother.”

The girl put her hands in her sides, the cheerful-little-kid image largely falling away. “I don’t know if that’s such a good idea, Dad. Not right now.”

There was a surprising firmness in those words, but my brother wasn’t shaken. “Victoria Marie Flynn, please don’t argue with me on this.”

Vicky just barely looked intimidated. “Okay” she said. “But don’t come to me if you start regretting it!”

With that, she was off, and Phineas strode to the window, his arms behind his back. The ‘I told you so’ was on my mind, but I was wise enough not to say it out-loud.

It only took about half a minute before Isabella showed up. I caught a short glimpse of irritation as she looked at me, but towards her husband she was all smiles. “Hey Phineas,” she said in a slightly sultry voice, “whatcha doing?”

I wasn’t sure whether she was genuinely oblivious to his mood or if she was trying to call up fond memories in his mind. Either way, it didn’t make a difference. “You made the hotel reservation, Isabella” my brother said in an indignant voice. “After I told you I didn’t want to go!”

Isabella frowned. “You never told me no.” She folded her arms, and she gave me a glimpse which I barely caught but which I suddenly realized the implications of. _She thinks I’m trying to turn him against her._ I wasn’t sure how I felt about that.

Phineas clenched his fists and instantly loosened them – he never could stay furious for long. “No, I never said ‘no’”  he acknowledged. “You’re right about that. But I never said ‘yes’ either.”

“Were you expecting me to wait for that?” Isabella said, irritated and yet a little surprised. “You do realize how hard it is to book a hotel on such short notice, don’t you? I had to make a decision now, and you’d never refused. I’m sorry for not clarifying it with you, I just didn’t think we needed a discussion about every little thing in our lives. At least now we’ve settled this. There’s no need to be difficult.”

For a moment, I wondered whether Phineas was going to cave and conform once more – but then his expression met mine, and something there steeled his resolve. “We haven’t settled this, Isabella” he said softly. “You have, but I haven’t. That is something that has happened far too often in our marriage, and if we want to continue our lives together, it has to stop.”

Isabella blinked uncomprehendingly. “What are you talking about?”

Phineas sighed. “Isabella… first of all, I want to apologize. You were right. If I’d planned more effectively at work, I could have been home more often than I have. I didn’t really realize this until today, but the main problem wasn’t that I couldn’t come home, but that I was dreading it, and that I didn’t want to. I didn’t want to just go back to the same arguments over and over again.”

Isabella looked betrayed and confused. “What arguments? There wouldn’t have been any arguments if you had been home more often… and if you could have done that…”

My brother smiled gently. “Today wasn’t the first time, Izzy. I’m sorry I didn’t make that clear sooner, but there have been many occasions when you… well, you took me away from what I wanted to do. And it’s not that I hated that or anything – I love you. But you always took it for granted, and… I don’t really know what exactly I’m complaining about, I know you mean well, but I just never felt entirely comfortable.”

Isabella looked genuinely shocked and upset. “Phineas, why didn’t you tell me any of this before?”

“I tried!” Phineas exclaimed. He ran a hand through his hair and continued on a softer tone. “I’ve tried to tell you, but you never understood, or maybe you didn’t want to understand… and maybe I shouldn’t blame you, because I don’t even really know what I want and why I want it… but the problem is that you’ve always assumed you knew what I wanted better than I did, and I know I’ve often gone along with that and it’s partly my fault, but it is the main reason that we don’t talk to each other, that we’ve been so distant from each other. And you’re not wrong that we should spend more time with one another. But it shouldn’t be a chore.”

Isabella suspiciously looked at me. “Did Candace tell you that?”

“You can’t blame everything on my sister, Isabella” Phineas said, soft but resolute. “Sure, Candace told me a few things the past days that got me thinking…” I couldn’t restrain my grin at that, so I looked the other way, “… but that doesn’t mean that they’re not my ideas and my beliefs. I am not a centaur who is just there to give you a ride into Phineasland, Isabella, and sometimes I do wonder whether that’s all you see in me.”

Isabella sighed. “Phineas, you don’t have to be so… so extreme, about this. Calm down.”

Phineas stepped over to her and took her hand. “I love you, Isabella” he said softly. “I loved you, but last night another woman kissed me and I enjoyed it more than I could imagine! Now do you believe me that this is a big deal?”

The former Fireside Girl just stared at him, clearly in shock. “You… _kissed_ … another woman?” she whispered. “ _You_? You kissed _another woman_?”

“Actually, she kissed me, and largely because she missed her own husband” Phineas said. “But you’ll understand that I won’t go into detail about my kissing preferences now that my sister is here.”

Isabella had sat down, still in shock, and barely registered her husband’s words – which was too bad, by the way, as by Phineas’ standards that was a very impressive technical truth. “I can’t believe you’d do that” she wailed. “I mean, you love me! And Vicky!” She stared at him in fear, a particular kind of fear that she had obviously never experienced before in her life, because all doubts had always been erased before they could reach the surface of her mind. “Don’t you?”

It was interesting to see this conversation happen at two different stages in Isabella’s life – one in our world, when Isabella had been 13 as she’d walked in on Phineas kissing me, and one here and now, where she was 38. Young Isabella had been defiant, resilient, shocked at having long-standing beliefs challenged but able to go on. ‘Old’ Isabella was stuck in her ways. And now that those ways were under threat, she just broke down.

Phineas sat down next to her, putting his arms around her and gently rocking her back and forth. Isabella clung onto him for dear life, a state of mind I recognized because I had been there often enough. I suddenly felt superfluous.

“I love you” she whispered. “We’ve been together for fifteen years, I… I don’t want to lose you, Phineas.”

“You won’t” my brother reassured her. “I care about you. Never doubt that I care about you.”

He released her and awkwardly turned towards me. “Candace… maybe you should take my car and my blueprints and go ahead to SHED. I’ll join you there as soon as possible.”

It wasn’t a very subtle message to leave, but I could understand where he was coming from. “Okay” I replied, leaving him to console Isabella. For some reason, I wasn’t bothered as much anymore by what they might be doing together. Maybe in a way I’d matured as well over the past days.

I took the car, went over to SHED and waited. Sure, I did work a little, but I was no Phineas, it remained a two-man job and the morning’s events kept haunting my mind.

It was about an hour later when Phineas showed up, and he wasn’t very talkative. He looked like he was overcome with an unusual sullenness. We worked for a few hours, but by the time the sun was setting and I was in the relaxing chair again with the mind helmet to see whether I could get through (I couldn’t but I was _so_ close!) I could no longer contain my curiosity. “So…” I said casually, “did anything important happen between you and Isabella after I was gone?”

Phineas froze for a moment before resuming his work. “We… talked” he replied. “We talked for a long time longer than I had expected. It was like we had opened a dam and now every untold feeling during our entire lives together poured out. Isabella cried, I cried… we didn’t stop until Vicky came into the room and we realized what kind of picture we were presenting to her. We shared a family hug, and then I finally left. And… well, I don’t know for sure where we’re going to go from here. We want to stay together, we care about Vicky and about each other… but it’d take a lot of time and effort if we want to really make it work.” He smiled. “Right now, I feel like I want to lock myself up in here even after you get home, just to stay away from it all – not from her, but from the issues between us. I enjoy inventing here, it relaxes me. I don’t know how I ever could have forgotten how much I love this.”

It took me a while before I could think of something to say, but when I could they were words of conviction. “You’ll be fine, Phineas” I told him confidently. “If anyone could make it through this, it’s you.”

Phineas smiled. “I’m glad the person who knows me best has such confidence in me. I wish I could repay it by helping you get home.”

I shrugged. “Hey, you’ll get there too. We just aren’t hopeless enough yet. It’s usually only then that you get the solution you’re looking for.”

Phineas chuckled. “You and your theories. I’d be surprised if that actually works. Do you mind keeping the mind transmitter on for a few minutes? I have to run a few tests.”

“Yeah, I can tough it out for a while more” I replied, failing to suppress a yawn that lead me to blush. “I’m not going to move from this chair in the next half hour or so anyway. It’s been an exhausting day, and I’d like to have some comfort.”

“Well, don’t get too comfortable” my brother warned me, although there was a smile on his face. “If I’m going to make another serious test, I don’t want to shock you by conducting it while you’re asleep.”

“Yeah, yeah, it’s fine” I replied drowsily. “I’ll be fine, Phineas. Don’t worry about me.” I leaned back in the chair, and a few moments after I’d closed my eyes I was barely even feeling my helmet anymore. Another few moments later, I was sound asleep…

…only for Phineas to wake me up again. I glanced at the clock to see only a few minutes had gone by, but his facial expression was highly enthusiastic. “What’s going on?” I wondered.

In response, he handed me a chart with a rather turbulent graph on it. Although the line stayed low for most of the chart’s course, it was a lot higher over the last couple of minutes. “We’re making contact?” I guessed. “But how? I was asleep…”

Phineas shrugged. “I don’t know either, but apparently you being asleep was conductive for linking with your home dimension. If you go back to sleep now and stay asleep for a while, and my own sister does the same at any point, you should be able to make contact and swap minds.”

I nodded, slowly processing that, and then I cracked a smile. “So basically, what you’re saying is that you woke me up to tell me to go to sleep?”

I was expecting to see a grin on my brother’s face, or maybe a sheepish smile as that truth set in. What I got was much more serious. “No. I woke you up to say goodbye.”

That… that was true, wasn’t it? If this idea of linking up while asleep worked, I wouldn’t see him again. Probably not ever, but at least not for a long while. I nodded, awkwardly standing up and looking at him. “Well, goodbye then” I blurted out, instantly feeling the urge to chastise myself because that sounded incredibly awkward. I should get out more. “I mean… thank you. Thanks for everything. You’ve been a great help.”

“Well, you did some of the work yourself” Phineas pointed out. “Not to mention that… well, you are my sister. I couldn’t leave you hanging. You’d do the same for me.”

“I would try” I agreed, suddenly realizing how awful it would have been if Phineas had been the one mind-swapped instead of me. I would probably have gone to Ferb, but Ferb wasn’t home of course, which left relying on Xavier… and given that my own Phineas still hadn’t brought me back yet, it was fair to say that this was probably out of my son’s league. Which meant that it was most likely out of my league as well. I would have tried, but I couldn’t have guaranteed success. These were the moments when I wished that I was as scientifically gifted as my brothers. I didn’t know whether I’d still like that gift once I had it, but the grass on the other side was looking really green right now.

I looked up at my brother and impulsively stepped forwards to hug him. “Just… thanks. For everything. Including kissing me.” Phineas rolled his eyes. “You may not be my Phineas, and you might have taken different life choices compared to him, but don’t ever let my other self or Isabella or anybody else tell you you’re not awesome, because you are.” The moment I said it, I knew how corny it sounded. Maybe it really was a good thing that I wasn’t going to see him anymore.

I sat down and relaxed, feeling Phineas’ hand pat my shoulder for a moment before the sound of footsteps indicated that he was moving away from me. The itchy feeling of the mind transmitter on my head should have made it difficult for me to sleep, but I was still feeling drowsy after the long and complicated day and after the bad rest I’d had the previous night. The time on the clock indicated that it was almost ten P.M., so it was only logical that I would feel tired. But most of all, though, the reason that I could sleep was that I was at ease. I could do this. I would do this.

I leaned back, thought of home, and soon the world of Phinbella was nothing but a distant memory.


	17. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And the next half in the FLS-world... for AYA Candace, the last half. I really like Phineas' monologue at the start. I hope it sets out his view of Phindace pretty well, since most of the stories I've written have focused on Candace's side or left Phineas' half as merely 'he really really loves her, okay' which is perfectly canon but not exactly elaborate.
> 
> This is the third-to-last chapter, by the way, so brace yourself for the story ending soon.

**_ Chapter Sixteen _ **

Saturday, July 3rd 2037  
9:20 PM    
Danville  
FLS-Verse

After finishing our conversation about Phineas and his feelings, Amanda and I met up with Xavier in the main room, and it was honestly a relief to see him what with the intimidating and distrustful looks his sister was giving me. Xavier also looked stern, but the overwhelming notion on his face was sadness. Phineas sat all by himself at the bowling ball storage closet, staring wistfully into the distance. The Johnsons were gone, but I knew they were an irrelevance right now. I had to get out there and apologize to my brother.

As I stepped closer to him, he looked up, and this time it was inescapable that he had been crying. He stared at me, not in revulsion or in creepy attraction but in what actually seemed to resemble wonder. “You came back” he noted. “I didn’t think you would.”

I tried to smile. “Well… I’m still your sister. And Amanda told me I should probably apologize to you. So well, here I am.”

Phineas sighed and looked around to where Xavier and Amanda were still watching us intently. “Kids, why don’t you go ahead to the car. We’ll catch up with you in a minute.”

His words slightly unnerved me because I knew what he wanted to talk to me about, and from the way they looked back and forth at the two of us the kids weren’t ignorant either. “Are you okay, Dad?” Xavier asked nervously.

Phineas gave him a wafer thin smile. “I’ve been better… but for the moment, I’m fine. I just need to say one or two things to your mother’s counterpart.”

Xavier and Amanda exchanged glances before apparently deciding that this wasn’t their quarrel and they’d make it worse by trying to get involved in it. They headed out the back door of the bowling rink, and suddenly we were all alone. A cursory check over my shoulder at the rest of the room confirmed my thoughts – there was little chance that this conversation would be cut off because of someone walking in.

Unfortunately.

Phineas looked up at me, and I was surprised by the melancholy look in his eyes. I braced myself for the worst, and yet the first words out of his mouth were utterly unexpected. “I miss her, Candace.”

I couldn’t help myself. “Huh?”

Phineas sighed. “In retrospect, I probably shouldn’t have taken you here. I was so desperate to bond with you as a sibling that I overlooked the fact that you… that you just weren’t her. I knew that, of course I did, but I guess Jeremy Johnson showing up proved it more conclusively than I could have ever imagined.”

I didn’t know what to say to that, other than to nod along. “I flipped out” I said softly. “I overreacted at seeing Jeremy. Amanda said that the way I acted really hurt you.”

My non-brother nodded. “Yes, it did – but you know why, Candace?” He shook his head and smiled wistfully. “Through a large part of my life, you’ve been an enigma to me. I loved you when you were my big sister and I was just a little kid, and you were teaching me the things Mom couldn’t because she was still grieving over our biological father’s death. I loved you even as I grew older, when you were doing your own things and trying to live your own life. No one understood why you were so obsessed with trying to bust me or Ferb, and everyone I talked to expected that that would have driven me away from you. It didn’t. Not just because I was too blind to see the short-term punishments you had in mind for us, but also because I just couldn’t see the long-term goal, the point of busting, and because I knew for a fact that you cared about us. I knew there was a loving, caring person somewhere beneath that shell and I wanted nothing more than to show you that all your insecurities were unnecessary, and that I’d be there for you and help you out and whatever worried you, we’d get through it together. All that because I knew you were a kind person, I had seen it, and even though with you I had to try a lot harder than with other people I wanted to get that kind person to come out. Almost like a personal mission, you might say. And I don’t know what kind of life your Phineas… er, the Phineas from your reality has led, but if he’s anything like me he’s been trying to reach out to you time and time again. So please, Candace. You can say whatever you want, and you have the right to be frustrated because you’re missing your home, but please don’t tell me I don’t understand you, or don’t care about you, or only feel some creepy desire towards you. Because like it or hate it, your counterpart is the love of my life. I have had romantic feelings for her as long as I care to remember. When I tried to help her get through those insecurities, I wanted to look at her and hug her and bury my head against her and I’ve always wanted to do that, it just took Ferb to make me realize that that wasn’t average sibling behavior. My Candace has been my wife in all but name for fifteen years now, and the only criticisms of yours I’ll concede right away is that I haven’t focused on my work hard enough, and that I’ve been trying too hard to get you to integrate into our family life. But that’s not because I have any weird plans for you, or that I’m trying to replace her with you, it’s just because I miss her, Candace.” He sighed, casting his head down as if to stop me from seeing the tears in his eyes I’d already noticed. “I want to swap you two back, because quite honestly I wouldn’t know what to do without her.”

Wow.

I wanted to come up with a reply to that. I wasn’t sure yet whether it was going to be an appreciation of everything my brother had just said or an attempt to stick to my guns and rebut his points, but I wanted to say something.

How about ‘I’m sorry’? I could believe Phineas when he said he hadn’t had any creepy intentions towards me, and since I’d lived all those days quietly judging him on the basis of that I should probably apologize. I just couldn’t get the words through my lips. Instead I settled for what I believed to be the much lamer “I understand.”

Phineas nodded and sat down, motioning for me to join him, which I hesitantly did. “Thank you.” He eyed me carefully before he continued. “You’re my sister, Candace. Like it or loathe it, that means you mean a lot to me. I just hope that my other self means a lot to you, too.”

He did. The thought hadn’t occurred to me in a while, but now that Phineas had talked about outright losing his world’s Candace, I had to admit that the fear of losing my little brother was present in my heart, too. No matter how distant we’d grown, no matter how little we understood of each other, I still cared for him.

It was a start. Not the best start, but it was a start.

“I… I shouldn’t have hurt you like that, Phineas” I admitted. “I… I wasn’t thinking straight. You know I disapprove of a lot of the things you and your sister have done, and I can’t just stop disapproving of that if you ask me too… but I didn’t mean to offend you.”

Phineas raised an eyebrow. “Well, you did say that I had been trying to disgust you from the day I was born” he said quietly. “That kinda hurt.”

I winced, wishing I could undo the scene I’d just caused – and _not_ just because of how I had behaved in front of Jeremy. “Did I really say that?” I whispered. “I’m…” I took a deep breath. “I’m sorry. I genuinely am sorry, Phineas. I didn’t mean it. I know you haven’t been doing anything of the sorts.”

My brother gave me about the last reaction I would have expected – a wry chuckle. “I _know_ you didn’t really mean it, Candace” he said gently. “I know you inside and out by now. Your counterpart and I have been together for twenty years, and obliviousness or not, different reality or not, I should be able to figure out easily what makes you tick, and when you’re upset. And maybe that’s what stings me the most right now – that I didn’t notice how upset you were. You were having all these feelings and concerns, and I wasn’t there for you to help you get through them.”

I shrugged. “Well, it’s not exactly your responsibility. I should probably have been more sensible about it myself.”

“Well, I’m used to you being my responsibility – and vice-versa – so it feels wrong that I wasn’t able to help you there” Phineas pointed out. “Not to mention that helping you could have avoided tonight’s incident.”

How had we ended up in the situation where Phineas was apologizing for the fact that I had flipped out at him? Sure, the fact that I had flipped was because I had been hiding all those feelings all week, and the fact that I had been hiding them came from a reasonable suspicion of and distance to Phineas after finding out that he was in love with my other self… but even so, I was the one responsible for it. And I’d certainly gotten carried away in telling him off. I looked up and patted his shoulder. “It’s not your fault, Phineas” I said. “You couldn’t have known what would happen. And either way, what’s done is done. If you’re willing to trust me again, then I’m willing to trust you.”

It was a big offer, given how implicitly I’d distrusted him over the past weeks, and Phineas eyed me cautiously for a moment before breaking into a smile and nodding his consent. He cautiously put his arms around my shoulders, and even though I stiffened, I didn’t move away. Maybe it felt uncomfortable, maybe I hadn’t hugged him in a long time, but for crying out loud, he had earned it.

“I trust you” Phineas said softly. “I have to admit, it’s not even you that I really have the problem with.” Seeing my confused expression, he elaborated. “We’re not going to spend much more time together anyway, Candace, and although of course I’d like us to part on good terms it doesn’t really matter in the long run. What matters are our own siblings, and I don’t want to look at my Candace fearing that if she gets upset, she is capable of saying the exact same things you just said.”

Ouch. No matter the fact that I didn’t even support him being together with his sister, that still kind of stung. I gave Phineas my most straightforward answer. “If you’re willing to trust me, I’m sure you can trust her” I said. (Did I just admit that she might be a better person than me?) “And you can trust that she cares about you even through the most difficult of moments.”

Phineas gave me a curious look. “Very well” he said, standing up and offering me a hand. I held it briefly as I stood up and then we walked out of the bowling alley together, heading for the car. Phineas was saying something about the work we’d have to do tomorrow, but I wasn’t paying all that much attention. Not only was the conversation we’d just had obviously still on my mind, the headache from earlier was back and it had brought reinforcements. I wished Phineas had aspirin on him, but I was sure even that wouldn’t be enough to quell it.

By the time we got to the car, Xavier and Amanda were already strapped in in the backseat. Neither of them paid much attention to us getting aboard, which I ascribed to the video game Xavier was trying to teach Amanda. From the snippets I could overhear it was one of the classics and Xavier was very enthusiastic about its timelessness – and of course, when I looked at it I realized that this video game had only just come out in my world.

Amanda gave up on her game play very shortly after the car took off – apparently, Amanda was just as bad at games as the rest of the family with myself as the sole exception – and I could see she was anxiously waiting for a good moment to broach the subject of what had just happened. I was about to speak up when the car phone rang. Phineas picked it up, and I discovered that not only was there a mobile connection in the car, it had a video screen as well.

Of course.

Baljeet appeared in front of the screen, and he looked even more nerdy than usual. “Phineas, Candace” he said in an anxious voice, “I am glad that I caught you. You need to come to the laboratory as soon as possible. I have discovered something that could be both the problem and the cure of the issue Candace is grappling with, but time is running out.”

I wouldn’t have noticed how nervous Phineas was getting if not for the fact that I could see the speedometer gradually begin to climb. “And what _is_ the problem?” I asked for his benefit.

Baljeet shook his head and let out a simple chuckle. “Oh, it is actually quite easy. It is plain old sleep. The detachment of the unconscious state, combined with the after-effects of the mental transmitter, provided the exact circumstances needed for the residue of last Tuesday’s programming to take effect and for you and your local counterpart to switch places. I am not sure yet, but I think that simply falling asleep while under the mind helmet would increase the potential Candace has to reach her home by at least two or three times.”

There were soft hushes of surprise in the car, and I couldn’t blame them. If I hadn’t had that accursed headache I could probably have shouted with joy. Sleep. It was just simple sleep that had brought about my journey here, and it was sleep which had the best chances of reversing it. I felt myself anticipating going to bed.

And then another aspect occurred, one I’d previously failed to pick upon but which was probably important. “Okay, but why is this so urgent all of a sudden?” I asked him. “I doubt that ‘time is running out’ for me to simply go to bed – well, to the bed in Phineas’ lab.”

Phineas looked awkwardly at me, and then to the video screen. He was clearly uncomfortable, and from the look in Baljeet’s eyes I could see our Indian friend was picking up on it. “I do not think that is for me to tell, Candace.”

His words were directed to me but his eyes were on Phineas, which proved to be enough impetus for my brother to steel his resolve and nod. “Right” he said. “I will explain this to her. We’ll be with you as soon as possible.”

“I hope so” Baljeet replied. He almost cut off the connection, but before that he made eye-contact with the both of us for one more time. “Good luck.”

When the phone call was terminated, I was beginning to get seriously agitated about the secrecy around me, and the expression on my face proved to be enough to get Phineas to act. “This is going to be a difficult story, Candace” he said. “Remember how I was panicked earlier this week and you were wondering what was wrong with me? And how I told you just now how worried I am about losing you – well, the other you?”

I nodded. “Yeah, yeah, I remember that. Why?”

“The mind transmitter… may have had some unintended side-effects” Phineas contentlessly explained. “Specifically, the strain it places on your mental functions is far greater than I’d originally anticipated. Baljeet showed me an exponential chart that indicates that if you apply the pressure too far, the headaches will not only multiply, but they could have ended up liberally blowing Candace’s mind – either mentally or, at worst, physically.”

A chill ran down my spine. “But you tested it on your own sister!” I protested. “That has to mean it’s safe, right? You wouldn’t expose her to that kind of danger…”

“Of course I wouldn’t!” Phineas exclaimed. “And it didn’t happen, and there’s only a minute chance that it would have happened… I thought it was safe, and my simulations showed it to be safe, but I didn’t probe deep enough, and now…” He sighed. “I’m an idiot. I never should’ve tried this without Ferb being there, and to think that there was a chance… it’s the cruise ship incident all over again.” His increasingly emotional behavior was beginning to affect his driving, and I was very relieved when we pulled into the Flynn driveway. My head already hurt, and this story was making it worse.

“The one that sank?” Amanda replied. I seemed to recall something of the sorts from my own childhood as well.

“There were two, actually” Phineas and Xavier said in unison, and my brother cracked a small smile in surprise as he looked at his son before continuing. “This was a cruise ship I made to take out on a trip with your mom – and this one also sank, but a lot further from the coastline. Your mother almost _drowned_ , Amanda, and to me it felt like I could finally understand why she’d always been so worried about our ‘dangerous’ projects. I could have killed her because I wasn’t prepared well enough for a shipwreck, and it took me weeks before I got over that fear. And here we are twenty years later, I didn’t take enough precautions, and everything that went wrong just seems to have happened all over again.”

 “Dad.” I looked up to see Xavier’s hand on Phineas’ shoulder. “It’s okay. You didn’t know how dangerous it was, and you said yourself that there was only a small chance that anything would have happened, or will happen, right?” I was impressed by how well he was able to console his father given the fact that his deathly pale face told me all I needed to know about Xavier’s own state of mind.

“Less than one percent at the highest power level I put the mind transmitter on, increasing exponentially with the next couple of levels – and I wasn’t going to go there anyway” Phineas said. “But the thought of what could’ve happened, and that I didn’t know…” 

“But you know now, and you’re going to do everything you can to help Mom get home” Amanda said, hugging her father by leaning over her seat and putting her arms around his chest. “I have faith in you, Dad.”

Phineas smiled. “Thanks, kids. You’re right – I should probably focus. Self-chastisement doesn’t help anyone.” He frowned as he looked at them. “Will you two be fine staying here while Candace and I go to the company to switch your Mom… huh, _Moms_ , I guess, that sounds weird… anyway, while we’re switching them back?”

Amanda and Xavier exchanged glances. “If that’s what you and Aunt Candace want…” Amanda started tentatively, in a way that suggested that she herself wasn’t so sure.

I could see a chance to redeem myself in ‘my’ daughter’s eyes and was about to take it when Phineas spoke up. “I understand that you want to come along because you’re worried, but it really might be better if you stay here” he said gently. “If something does go wrong, I don’t want you around to be traumatized by it. This is _my_ mess, and not yours.” I was surprised by the resolve in his voice, though also increasingly concerned for my own sake.

The kids chose not to argue with their father – probably having recognized the same resolve in his voice – which left only saying goodbye, and that goodbye was fairly short. I think Mandy and I had already said a lot of what we needed to say earlier in the evening, and of course Xavier had had that chat with me earlier in the week, which he reminded me of by whispering “talk to Dad” during our goodbye hug – and I knew he wasn’t talking about his own father. Whom he took a long time to let go of, by the way. The news about his mother had really shaken the kid up… then again, who could blame him. I was an adult, and I was terrified. The only saving grace about my fear was that it kept me from mulling over the fact that the cruise ship story was not quite what I had expected it to be and the guilt I felt for making all those assumptions earlier that week.

By the time we got to the headquarters of Flynn-Fletcher Incorporated, it was already past 10 o’clock and my head was pounding. I was out of the car the instant Phineas turned off the engine, and I rushed inside, barely aware that he was following me. I knew the mind-swapping procedure could be risky now, but I didn’t care. I could not go on like this.

Baljeet met us in the lobby, and we noticed that he was already wearing a lab coat. While we went down through the elevator, he explained how he had come to tonight’s revelation. “It occurred to me at home while Ginger and I were having dinner with the kids” he said. “I drove up here and made some calculations, and they all worked. That’s when I called you.”

I nodded, gulping with dread as we entered the central room. “So, I’m supposed to just sleep?” I asked. “That’ll be difficult, given how much my head already hurts.”

“Let’s start with something relatively simple, then” Phineas said, handing me the mind transmitter. I put it on my head, wincing as it touched so many sore spots. If I got out of this experience in one piece, I’d steer clear from any unnatural technology as long as I could. But I had to do this. Not only because I wanted to get home, and because trying to avoid this moment could make things worse, but because I had promised my brother that I would trust him. And after what I’d done tonight, I knew I could not go back on my word.

Phineas flipped the machine on, and at first it didn’t hurt all that much more than it already did. What was more, when I lied down and tried to relax as much as possible, I could actually sense a very faint presence trying to latch on to me.

“Is it working?” my brother asked, with an eager impatience that was familiar and a nervousness that was not.

“It’s beginning to work” I replied. “But I still don’t know how you’re expecting me to sleep like this.”

There was a moment’s pause before Phineas jumped up and ran out of the room. Baljeet and I exchanged glances, but he was back before we knew it and from the expression on his face he was actually excited – it was good to see him like that again, all that concern had been very un-Phineaslike. “Ferb and I designed these” he said, holding out a strip with a few small pills. “They’re a more advanced version of aspirin. I don’t know for sure whether they’ll hinder the process of contacting the other dimension, but they should not – they _will_ not be harmful to you in anyway.”

I nodded, wanting to smile at his brief bout of confidence but feeling unable to do so. I swallowed the pill, which tasted a lot like vanilla. “So with this, you do think I should be able to sleep?”

It was Baljeet who answered. “I am unfamiliar with your brothers’ technology, but it certainly appears to be so” he replied. “The computer monitoring your brain activity is already picking up a subtle shift which is likely to expand. Overall, the figures indicate that there is a very high probability that you will make contact if and when you fall asleep. You should probably just try to relax, and maybe it will work and you will be able to make the switch on the first try.”

I couldn’t get a lot of reassurance from that statement, but I was prepared to try anyway. And then something else occurred to me. “I take it this is goodbye, then?”

“Most likely” Baljeet agreed.

“Okay, then… well, thanks for all the help.” I turned to my brother. “And you too. Thank you for helping me out, and for your hospitality I suppose. I’m – I’m sorry for all the trouble.”

Phineas waved off my apology. “That’s fine, Candace. I built this machine in the first place, and if I had to do the whole thing over again to help you, I’d do so in a heartbeat.”

I nodded, feeling just a little bit flattered. “All right then.”

Pills or no pills, it is surprisingly difficult to sleep when your head feels like it’s trying to break apart (and when you’ve just been told that there is a remote possibility that it will indeed happen, and when two guys behind monitors are watching your every move). I don’t know how long I was there for? Maybe five minutes, possibly ten or twenty. But eventually, the drowsiness overcame me, and with it came the presence I’d felt earlier.

 _“Hello?”_ I called out. _“Is anyone there?”_

The wait was tantalizingly long. I felt like the presence was reacting to my probe, but I just didn’t hear anything. And then, finally, a cautious _“hello?”_ came back.

The relief I felt at hearing my own voice talk back to me there was immense, but I wasn’t reassured yet. _“Are you Candace Flynn?”_

_“Yes.”_

If my eyes could narrow while I was in my own mind, they would have. _“The one who’s been screwing her brother?”_

The reply this time was extremely deadpan. _“Occasionally.”_

Despite the fact that I knew it was coming, I still got uncomfortable at finally coming mind-to-mind with this radically different version of me, who barely even flinched when I confronted her with the worst of her transgressions in the most blunt way possible. _“Why?”_ I mentally exclaimed. _“You had our Jeremy! You loved him! What in the world could possess you to ever give in to the whims of your own brother! You know incest is wrong, right?”_

 _“You know I_ love _him, right?”_ my counterpart furiously replied. _“I didn’t just ‘give into his whims’. On that note, I could ask you why you’re seeing a psychiatrist. Or why you never talked about any of your busting issues with your brothers… heck, why you’re never talking to them at all anymore! I mean, I didn’t know what I would imagine from seeing a version of me who had ended up with Jeremy, I never really thought about it until now, but I certainly wouldn’t have imagined her completely shutting out Phineas and Ferb!”_

Even though part of me had felt meek and cowered ever since Amanda’s rant had shut me up back at the bowling alley, my other self’s accusations awakened a spark in me. _“I would_ never _shut out Phineas and Ferb”_ I replied. _“I simply grew up. Something I haven’t seen you doing, or Phineas for that matter, because he’s still making all those stupid inventions of his and you’re living with him and apparently condoning it, and you’re still not living in the real world! And you have a lot of nerve to talk to me about abandoning my brothers, when you’ve been making him abandon everything around him just for the sake of getting to live your weird incest fantasies! He hasn’t even talked to people like Baljeet and Buford in years!”_

 _“Yeah, really, like you’re one to talk there”_ Other-Candace scoffed. _“You didn’t ‘grow up’, you simply started ignoring everything around you to pretend you were grown up – your busting issues, the fact that your relationship with Jeremy is unhealthy, and even your own brothers! ‘Growing up’ to you means that rather than sitting down and talking to Phineas about what makes you tick and what’s caused all that tension between you in the past, you simply decided to push him out of your life completely! Something he’s also partly to blame for, I admit that, but you’re the one who barely ever comes over to visit her nine-year-old niece! What was the last time you attended one of her birthdays, Candace – last year? Two years ago? Or was the only reason she recognized me because Phineas had pictures of us lying around, because if it had been up to you, she wouldn’t have had a clue of who we are!”_

 _“My relationship with Jeremy is_ not _unhealthy!”_ I snapped. _“Sure, I have… a few issues! They aren’t too serious, but they are why I am seeing a psychiatrist – and at least I’m getting professional help, unlike you who thinks having a relationship with your brother is entirely normal! I don’t know what you told him, but Jeremy loves me and I love him, we have great kids together, and I’d rather have a marriage with maybe a few issues here and there than the total delusion you’re living under! Aside from the fact that it’s so obviously wrong that I’m not going to bother to explain it to you, do you really think you’re going to be able to happily shut yourself out from the world around you forever?”_

There was a pause at the other end. _“…did Amanda tell you that?”_

I wondered whether I was getting through to her. _“No. I can figure out things for myself. The point is, your relationship is the one that’s in trouble, not mine.”_

I heard a chuckle. _“Ah, you see, but that’s exactly where you’re wrong.”_

_“Excuse me?”_

_“I mess up. I mess up a_ lot _. I can’t begin to tell you where I’ve done stuff wrong in the past because there are so many occasions. Busting? A stupid idea that wasn’t helping anyone. Pursuing Jeremy Johnson? I don’t know how many idiocies I’ve committed over the course of that. Trying to hide a secret relationship with my brother, and thus confining him and the kids from living their lives to the fullest? I admit that you have a point there. And, like always, when someone points out my biggest flaws that means I’ll go to Phineas and talk things out. And you know what? He won’t reject me, or break up with me, if that’s what you’re hoping for. He and I will find a solution together, and our relationship will emerge stronger precisely_ because _I admitted my own failure. And that is something you have never done. You talk to your psychiatrist, yes, but if what I found out about your life last week is any indication you’ve never_ listened _to him, because that would mean patching things up again with our brothers and admitting that you’re not always in the right, and that is something you’re too stubborn to do. You failed in your relationship with the boys, you failed with Jeremy. You, Candace, are the one that hasn’t grown up. And that’s something I think you should keep in mind as we finish this switch.”_

I wanted to come up with a good reply to shut her up. I tried so hard to think of something, but I couldn’t. She wasn’t reacting to the incest charges, and she was acknowledging her own failures. How was I supposed to win an argument against her when she was admitting she’d messed up?

She… she wasn’t right. Of course she wasn't. She was sleeping with her _brother_ , for crying out loud. There was a perfectly logical and easy way to rebuke all her points, and I was sure I could find it eventually.

But it would take a while. And until I found that perfect argument, I would be confronted with this smug, victorious other-dimensional version of myself. And I couldn't, wouldn't stand being around that for any longer than I had to.

This dimension was a madhouse, and I wanted to go home

I tried to reach out beyond her and felt the power of the mind transmitter moving across dimensions. Other Candace was noticing what I was doing, but she didn’t speak up, instead pushing back from the other dimension to make the switch. For the first time in a while, I could concentrate on my own confidence that I would, at last, go home.

But I knew it – and I – would never quite be the same again.


	18. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The last AYA chapter, in which AYA Phineas and Candace wrap things up. It doesn't quite go as AYA Candace expected it to go. But maybe that's a good thing.

**_ Chapter Seventeen _ **

Saturday, July 3rd 2037  
11:07 PM    
Danville  
AYA-Verse

Swapping minds was a sensation that I had anticipated with some dread. Of course I wanted to go home, but now that I was aware of it happening, I wasn’t so sure whether I actually felt up to the transfer. Would it hurt? Or would my drowsy lack of consciousness shield me from any ill effects? Phineas’ confession about the possible consequences of this procedure still rang in my ears, but in the end I was probably too out of it to really have that register. I just pulled at the one string of home, moving forwards even though I wasn’t really sure what I was doing. I mentally took a deep breath, and then relaxed.

Slowly, I began to register something around me again. First, that my eyelids were heavy. Second, that it was a little colder out than I remembered. Third, that as I was moving my hand around to try to get a (physical) grasp on the situation, I could feel someone reaching for it. I instinctively clutched onto that person’s hand for comfort.

My thoughts were moving very, very slowly. Where was I? Why was I here again? With some effort, I opened my eyes and blinked a few times. I was in… a hangar. A wooden shed? It reminded me of something, something from long ago…

“Candace?”

It was Phineas’ voice. I recognized it instantly, and it was enough to make me keep my eyes open and focus upon him. I registered that he was standing next to my chair (why was I in a chair, hadn’t I been on a bunk just now?) and holding my hand. Almost without thinking, I yanked it free from his grasp.

Phineas chuckled. “Yup, that’s the Candace I remember.” He gave me a warm, slightly bittersweet smile. “Welcome home, sis.”

Home. I was _home_. Reality truly set in now, that after all those days of torture in the other dimension, Phineas… other-Phineas had finally come through for me, with a little help from Baljeet. I could go back to Jeremy, to the kids, to my work, to my life…

…I couldn’t stand up. I tried to, but I ended up sitting back down. I tried again, but I was still far too shaky on my feet to stand for more than a few seconds.

My brother shook his head, a gesture that felt a little patronizing. “Are you that eager to get out of here, Candace?”

“Well, are you surprised that it’s a little awkward for me to see you right now?” I told him. “Unless the other me told you nothing about what she and her brother have been up to back in their crazy dimension, I’d think you would get why I would appreciate for us to have some time as far away from each other as possible.”

“Yeah, that was pretty weird, wasn’t it?” Phineas mused in a far more casual way than what should even be possible. “Come to think of it, I never got around to asking the other you how they actually got together. Did my other self ever tell you that? Given that you know they were a couple, you must have spoken to him.”

I blinked rapidly. “That is all you have to say about it?” I exclaimed. “That it was ‘pretty weird’? Phineas, our counterparts – they were psy- they were _insane_! And I don’t mean that in the ‘completely bonkers in the head’ way, because the other you _was_ decent to me, but it seemed like they viewed their incestuous escapades as just a slightly deviant choice compared to our norm, as if it was anywhere near to being normal, and then at the end it turned out they thought _we_ were the crazy ones! I made contact with the other me just before getting switched back, and she had the audacity to lecture me on our life choices! To say that we’re the ones who messed up in our lives! At least we know right from wrong, and we know that they are just not normal!”

Phineas had remained unmoving through much of my rant, but when I was done he blinked. “So what you’re saying is that we lead completely normal, stable lives, and they’re the one that should be doing the soul-searching? That none of their complaints hold water?”

I snorted. “Obviously, yes. My other self must really have gotten to you if she got you to doubt _that_.”

My brother shrugged. “Maybe you’re right. Maybe she did got to me too much and I forgot that they’re the weird ones, while we’re doing nothing wrong. Oh well.” He smiled at me. “Then I suppose now would be the time to wish you a happy birthday.”

Wait, what? I blinked. “Phineas, my birthday won’t be until next week” I said, frowning. “You know that, don’t you?”

Phineas looked at me, a serious expression on his face. “I know that, and that’s exactly my point. Your birthday is next week, but the way things are going I’m not going to make it to it. Just like you didn’t make it to my birthday this year. Maybe that is the way things are right now between us, and maybe such distance between a brother and a sister is part of leading a normal, stable life – but then I wouldn’t _want_ to lead a normal, stable life. When was the last time we spoke to each other, Candace? You can’t deny that our counterparts have a point there. They’re closer than they’ve ever been, and we’re barely on speaking terms. And I know that’s in part because we’ve got our own busy lives to lead and I admit that some separation between siblings is natural, but you can’t deny that for a large part we’ve just been complacent. It was far too _easy_ not to talk to each other anymore.”

I just stared at him, his words reminding me far too much of my counterpart’s (which had to mean that I could freely dismiss them out of hand, right?). “And that is supposed to compensate for incest? Like, they’re having _kids_ together but ooh, we’re missing each other’s birthdays so we’re the bad guys?” 

Phineas recoiled at the loudness of my voice, and I took advantage of it by getting up and walking over to the exit – I was a little more stable on my feet now. However, Phineas came to his senses before I could reach the door – why did my brothers have to make this shed so big anyway? – and blocked my path. “I didn’t say we’re the _bad_ guys, Candace” he said calmly. “Other Dimension Candace might want to believe that, but I don’t. But whatever you think of what they get up to, you can’t deny that we should have a critical look at our own relationship. We have been distant from each other, and there are so many good reasons we can think up for that, but even so… I’ve missed you, sis. We are brother and sister, we used to be friends, and still I think this is the first time we’ve really spoken to each other since we bumped into each other in the supermarket a few months back. Remember? We had to cut off the conversation halfway through because the weathermen were predicting a snow storm, and we haven’t seen each other since.”

“That can’t be right” I replied firmly, though a little shaken nonetheless. I tried to walk on past him but he still kept up with me even after I exited SHED. I gave him a look and then sighed, realizing that he wasn’t going to let me leave just like that. I decided to settle for just sitting down on the swing set instead. Phineas sat down next to me after giving the swing set a strange smile for a fleeting moment. Which was pretty weird, to be honest.

“Okay, so first of all,” I spoke up, resolving to defend my case, “I may not have been to your birthday last month, but I did send you a postcard.” I noticed how Phineas frowned at me. “I admit that may not have been much, but very few people even send post cards anymore so it’s still a conscious effort. And as for when we last met, I saw you a few more times after the snow storm, like at the lemonade bar, and that one time in the park, that was only a few weeks ago… but I guess you didn’t realize I was there because I didn’t speak to you then.”

Phineas gave me a weird look. “Why not?”

“Well, I…” Why didn’t I speak to him? It suddenly occurred to me that I didn’t actually have a good reason for it. It had just seemed logical to get out of there at the time. Almost as if I was…

…avoiding him.

My instant inclination was to try to get away from that conclusion. Of course I wasn’t avoiding my brother, why would I? Sure, Phineas was an awkward dork who had done so many infuriating things when he was younger, but he’d grown out of that now. He was a successful special effects master, and even if he still always had to be better than me that didn’t mean I disliked him or anything.

It just felt so easy, so natural to not talk to my little (well, not-so-little) brother. We were grown up, and apart from the occasional encounters at family parties (we still managed to catch just about half of each other’s birthdays over the past years and that’s a higher tally than some people get) there was no reason to have long conversations with one another. I had Dr. Baumer for that, and I wasn’t going to get Phineas, of all people, involved in it. And yet… the memory of the talk I’d had with the other Xavier flashed through my mind. His claim that the relationship between his parents was healthier than the one between Phineas and myself because they talked to each other more had stuck in my mind because of how outrageous and how absurd it was, but that was no reason to reject the premise of talking more altogether. There was no reason to avoid a good conversation at all cost.

Because for all my failings, courage was something I had never lacked.

As I was mulling all that over in my mind, Phineas had sat down on the swing set next to me, an inquisitive look on his face. “I understand, sis” he said softly. “I’m as much at fault as you are here. We haven’t really talked in depth for a long time. And I guess I was always okay with that, but the other Candace got me thinking. I don’t know about you, but my perception of the other dimension was that they _were_ happier together, even if she was a little insecure about it. And given that, as you said, they’re in an incestuous relationship, their happiness compared to ours is really weird.”

“I’m happy, though” I pointed out, still trying to ward off the unease I felt at that statement. “Jeremy and I are happy. And you’re… well, you’re still married to Isabella.” That had to count for something.

“Isabella and I had some intense fights over the past couple of days” Phineas said softly. He seemed to be merely reflective about that, perhaps a little melancholic, rather than as upset as I would have expected him to be. “And it wasn’t just because of Other Dimension Candace, if that’s what you’re wondering. And as for your own stability and happiness… well, I guess you’re the only one who can really answer that question.”

He shut up after that, probably being well aware that it would almost force me to think over the last words he said. It was effective, too. I couldn’t deny that the events of the past hours, particularly in the other dimension, had not been my proudest. And maybe over the past week, I had been acting in a way that was a little obsessive, paranoid and… actually kind of messed up.

And maybe, just maybe, my relationship with Jeremy did have a flaw or two.

You know, it’s amazing how much about yourself you can question once you really get started. And there is no real way to stop it, except to give in.

“Fine” I finally muttered. “Let’s talk. About what, exactly? Current lives? Our past? Where it all went wrong?”

Phineas didn’t roll his eyes at my snarkiness. Instead, he asked a question that sincerely took me aback. “Do you love me?” he said softly. “As a brother? Do you… and _did_ you feel sibling love for me?”

I blinked. “I… of course” I stammered. “Sure, maybe you were a little annoying from time to time, but you were, and are, still my brother. The fact that I’m weirded out by what our counterparts did with their relationship won’t diminish ours… it _shouldn’t_ diminish ours.”

Phineas nodded thoughtfully. “The reason I asked you was because I could never really get a good sense of what you felt about me” he replied. “You say you love me, and I suppose I knew that. I remember the good times, and I remember all the times you were the best big sister I could have ever wished for. But I also remember how you spent every day of summer trying to bust me, and even though I didn’t get it at the time I realized eventually what you were trying to do was designed to hurt me, and… well, it did. It hurt. I just couldn’t figure out why you were doing it, what we were doing that was so bad that we deserved all this, and you never made it clear to me. I never stopped loving you, but I think that realization took some of the shine off my brotherly feelings for you.”

The monologue was uncomfortably reminding me of Other Phineas’ declaration of love about his sister back in the other dimension, and for once, the discomfort was not primarily caused by the fact that my brother was emulating his other self, but by what he was actually saying. “I didn’t think you were bad, Phineas” I reassured him. “You were a good brother, but you were immature at times, and you were building all those dangerous projects, and I wanted to protect you.”

Phineas frowned. “We always had helmets or other protection around, you know that, and there were plenty of our projects that weren’t dangerous in any way” he said. “Not to mention that for someone who wanted to protect us, you seemed to mention wanting to get us in trouble an awful lot.”

I stiffened. “Well, I wanted you to feel the consequences for the dangerous things you were doing” I replied, the reasoning sounding awfully circular even in my mind. “And… well, even if your projects weren’t always dangerous… well, I still felt uncomfortable around them, and you always had to one-up me, and… I don’t know, okay? It made so much sense to me at the time, and it still does now, but I can’t explain it. Not everything. I know that must sound so stupid, but…”

“It doesn’t” Phineas interrupted firmly. “I made plenty of decisions back then that I can’t explain to myself anymore either. I think the fact that I was still so young as all those things were going on, and I was always so focused on inventing things, made that I often didn’t notice when you were feeling hurt, or when Isabella was being hurt by my obliviousness… heck, maybe not even when Ferb would occasionally be upset. I guess that’s one part where I would have to disagree with your other self. She insisted that stopping to invent isn’t something that fit with my personality, and maybe she’s right, but that doesn’t take away that the fact that I was always inventing got in the way of my relations with my family. Maybe Other Dimension Phineas managed to balance the two, but I don’t think I could do that.”

“Well, it’s not like you had to help me all the time” I replied. “Sure, I went through some tough phases, but you were my little brother. You were young and immature and into all that childish stuff, I couldn’t possibly have come to you with my problems. I shouldn’t, and I wouldn’t.”

“Other Dimension Candace came to her brother” Phineas pointed out.

“Yeah, but they’re weirdoes who are in love with each other for some reason.” It sounded less creepy and more just quirky every time I said it, which should be a good enough reason to stop thinking about it and get out of here. “I don’t think we should really hold ourselves to their standard.” A thought occurred to me. “You… _you_ don’t think we should be like them, do we? Do the… things that they do?”

Phineas could perfectly well have interpreted that as referring to just us being close and talking to each other about our problems all the time, and I was half expecting him to do so, but he looked at me and after some deliberation – he was still slow – shook his head with a chuckle. “No, I don’t” he said gently. “I just believe we should talk more, and I do agree that it was my responsibility to help you, not just because you needed the help I could give but also because there was nothing that really made me – and makes me – feel better than cheering you up. I’d forgotten about that.”

Okay, that wasn’t the most reassuring reply. “So, is that a yes or a no on the whole relationship question?” I replied. I _thought_ it was a no, it pretty much had to be a no, but… I took a very deep breath and pointedly looked away from him, steering my swing set as far out of the way as possible. “Phineas, I want you to be completely honest in this. I need to know whether everything you discussed with my other self has affected you. Do you, or do you not have feelings for me that go beyond us just being siblings?”

Phineas snorted. “Okay, how could my other self have possibly made it so that I developed feelings for you?” he pointed out. “Any feelings I could have developed in that time – which I didn’t, let me make that clear – would have been for your other self, not for you, because you simply weren’t there. I suppose it could have worked in an ‘absence makes the heart grow fonder’ sort of way, but if I was going to fall in love with you because I haven’t seen you in a while that would have happened a long time ago.”

I felt a strong sense of relief overcome me, as a worry I’d held for much of the past week ebbed away. “That’s good to hear. Because I love my husband, and no matter if they’re good people, even if they’re somehow better people, I would not want to do the things they did.”

“Which doesn’t mean that we can’t still learn lessons from them” Phineas pointed out. “We’ve been given a unique opportunity in meeting versions of ourselves from another dimension again. We should use it.”

I frowned. “Wait, what do you mean, ‘again’? I know you built a lot of crazy things back in the day and I also participated in more of them than I would have liked…” Phineas gave me a look, and I amended my statement, “…than I _thought_ I would have liked, but in any case, this is the first time I have ever travelled to and met people from another dimension.”

Phineas gave me an odd look. “No, it’s…” A flash of realization set in on his face. “We… we never told you, didn’t we? After all those years, we just never got around to it. We never told you about your memory loss.”

“I lost my memory?” I was about to say that I couldn’t remember that before realizing how stupid that would sound. “What did you guys do _this_ time?”

My brother frowned at me. “Candace, I hope you know better than to think Ferb and I would deliberately give you amnesia, or not do anything to fix it if we had. Not to mention, what would even be the point of building a machine to give people memory loss?”

I nodded. “Fair enough. Really, though, you guys are the only ones I know that would be able to build a machine like that.”

Phineas pondered that for a moment. “I guess that’s true” he said, still sounding a little disappointed that I had blamed him so easily, which was making me feel guilty in turn. “Anyway, the reason your mind was wiped was the same reason mine was, and Ferb’s, and Isabella’s, and so many others’. We found out that Perry was a secret agent. When he retired, Ferb, Isabella and I got to hear the whole story.”

I was momentarily stunned. “Perry? As in your old meat brick, do-nothing, smelly platypus Perry? A secret _agent_?”

Phineas rolled his eyes. “Seriously, Candace. It’s hardly the most impossible thing you’ve ever heard.”

“And that should tell you enough about my life” I snarked back. He was right, though – it didn’t feel as shocking as it probably should have, because in my life and especially over the past week or so I’d heard far more stunning things. (Yes, I do maintain that another version of me being with Phineas is more stunning than Phineas and Ferb’s old pet being James Bond.) Which was probably the only reason why another question actually managed to occur to me. “So how long have you known about this?”

“For over a decade” Phineas said warily. “I… I should have told you this sooner. I should have wanted to tell you this sooner, but I must have forgotten about it and then assumed you knew. And that just isn’t fair, because even if you may not have felt that way at the time, I certainly felt that you were one of us and you deserved to know as much as Ferb or Izzy or Buford or Baljeet did.”

“I was never one of you” I insisted, folding my arms and standing up. “For crying out loud, I was always trying to bust you guys!”

“But you enjoyed yourself, didn’t you?” Phineas said, getting up as well. His voice was firm and didn’t give me any room for denial. “I saw how you acted during that game of Giant Skiddley Whiffers, or in the giant unicycle, or when we went on that trip around the world, or during so many other ideas we managed to realize. It felt right to have you along, you enjoyed coming along even if you didn’t want to admit it… and that’s why I still don’t understand. Why did you keep wanting to punish us for something you didn’t hate? Why do you distance yourself from me when all I’ve ever wanted to do is help you?”

I hesitated. Now that he put it like that, it did sound a little harsh. I took a few cautious steps away from him but hesitated and turned back towards my brother. “I… I… oh, all right! I’ll try to explain it to you, but I just don’t know, okay? I don’t know why I always wanted to bust you guys… heck, why I _want_ to bust you guys. Every time I think I’ve finally quelled the urge it just pops up again. Maybe it’s time to admit that I’ve failed at getting it under control.” And that was a really depressing thought, to be honest. “I’ve been unfair to you, Phineas. To you, and to Ferb. I couldn’t stand thinking that you were so much better than me, and I guess that to a certain extent I thought busting you was going to make Mom believe I wasn’t crazy but I never succeeded anyway so that only made it worse. And… well, I just had to do it. I know that sounds crazy, and I know it was probably wrong in retrospect, but I had to. As soon as the chance to bust you guys popped up I just couldn’t focus on anything else anymore. I’ve tried to get over it, and I think I’m _mostly_ over it by now, but for the life of me I still don’t know why I want it. I just can’t stop it.”

Phineas stared at me, and from the expression on his face I was not a pleasant sight to stare at. I probably looked miserable. And then he did something I didn’t expect and couldn’t even fully realize before he had already done it – he threw his arms around me and hugged me.

I stiffened. I couldn’t be hugged by my brother. Not after all I’d gone through in the other dimension. Not after seeing firsthand just how far physical affection between us could go – and seriously, I did not want to go down that path. But the hug was comfortable, and it reminded me of a simpler time. A better time, perhaps. When I had been a neurotic wreck, sure, and I had nowhere near the control over my senses that I did now… but I hadn’t always needed to. Because on some level I’d known then, as I do now, that Phineas was there when I needed him.

For some part that realization filled me with fear, because it seemed like the kind of sappy thing that could have easily lead my counterpart on a path to her relationship with her brother. I should be feeling that way about Jeremy, not Phineas. But love it or loathe it, Jeremy wasn’t here right now.

And the man who was here instead was someone I’d owed a good hug for a long time.

I remained stiff throughout the hug, but I didn’t let go. And in the process of the hug, I first started to get a glimpse of understanding for my counterpart. Phineas Flynn was not passionate or romantic – not that such traits particularly shone through in a hug – but hugging him felt like coming home. I was at ease. I felt safe. I didn’t really want to let go.

When Phineas finally did back away, he had an awkward expression on his face. “You know, I really hadn’t expected this conversation to be this… shaky.”

I nodded, knowing exactly what he meant. Going from trying to run from him to hugging him (and possibly back, for all I knew) didn’t exactly scream ‘stability’. “Well, at least I didn’t snap at you again in the last few minutes” I pointed out. “Baby steps.”

Phineas grinned at my joke. “Yeah, I guess you’re right. And we’re going to have to move in baby steps if we want to figure this thing out. We’re brother and sister, Candace. Full siblings. We belong together, obviously not in the way the other us’es would say they do, but you’ve been in my life since the day I was born, and you’ll always have a place there. And that is why I fully believe that regardless of how betrayed I might have felt, and how young and naive I was, I should have done more to understand you and be there for you. I’m sorry for that, Candace. Can you forgive me?”

Okay, at that point I really couldn’t restrain myself. I mumbled something like “of course I can, you dork” and practically lunged myself at his chest. I was hugging him, the man who in another world had been my lover, and I didn’t care. I wasn’t with Jeremy Johnson, and for the moment I didn’t care about that either.

“We’ll work things out” Phineas reassured me, stroking my hair. It was the kind of move that I normally would’ve dismissed as inappropriate after all that had happened, but for the moment – for this moment – I could not be bothered. “About you and Jeremy, and Isabella and me, about Ferb and everyone else… and about us. We’ll fix this family, Candace, and we’ll do it together.”

I had to snort a little at his optimism – I certainly couldn’t see as many launching points for repaired relationships as he appeared to see. But then I remembered that this was still Phineas Flynn. Special effects master, husband, father, but also someone who had once been a great inventor and a master of the impossible. And no matter how long ago he had cast that aside, and how much his life would always remain shaped by the past years, he could and had mastered the impossible again. My being here was proof of his prowess, no matter how much the other Phineas had probably contributed the lion’s share of the work. All I needed to do was have a little faith in him.

And for the first time in a long while, that was something I was fully prepared to do: to have faith in my brother. He would pull it off, because he _wanted_ to pull it off – and for Phineas Andrew Flynn, that alone would be enough.

Carpe diem.


	19. Epilogue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And the very last chapter. It's not my best ending ever, but it is an ending, and I hope you'll enjoy it either way. Feel free to leave constructive criticism in the comments.

**_ Epilogue _ **

Saturday, July 3rd 2037  
11:14 PM    
Danville  
FLS-Verse

When I woke up for the first time after my chat with my obnoxious, self-righteous, miserable, pathetic… kind of _relatable_ other self, it felt like I was awakening from a coma. Very gradually, my senses returned to me. First came the realization that I had been asleep and was now waking up. Part of me didn’t even want to, it was so much easier, less confrontational, to stay asleep… and then came the sound. A soft murmur of a voice close to me. ‘Phineas’, my mind smoothly filled in. At the same moment I realized someone was pressing my hand, carefully clutching my fingers between his. Strange, I didn’t remember him holding my hand when I drifted off, so why would he be doing that now? Unless…

Unless…

I blinked at that thought and tried to sit up as soon as I could. It did not, of course, go smoothly, and everything spun before my eyes. I had opened them but I still couldn’t see anything. My hand was pressed again, strongly this time.

“Easy there, Candace.” His voice sounded a little bit… I don’t know, almost desperate. “Be careful. _Please_ be careful.”

“I’ll be fine, Phineas” I replied almost without thinking. I sat backwards, blinked repeatedly and slowly cleared my sight. Look around I recognized the familiar contours of the main laboratory of Flynn-Fletcher Incorporated. And even if that hadn’t been enough, the devoted look in my brother’s eyes would have been enough to convince me.

“I’m home” I whispered. “I’m actually home.”

“You are” Phineas acknowledged softly. “Welcome back, sis.”

I slipped off the bench, still feeling a little instable, and practically jumped into his arms. That smile, that touch, that smell… I was home. Back where I belonged, with the person I loved most in the entire world.

You know, some people talk about bone-crushing hugs and they don’t mean it literally, but I think this time I was getting precariously close to actually crushing some of his bones. Even so, turnaround was fair play, and Phineas was hugging me tightly as well. Almost too tightly. I frowned. “Phineas, is something wrong?”

My brother frowned, loosening his grip slightly but not making any move to let go of me, which was another sign that something was up – he usually did that during conversations. “What do you mean?” he asked. “You’re hugging me as tightly as I’m hugging you.”

“I know” I replied. “But I’m the overdramatic one.” I gave him a cheesy grin. “You’re usually more mellow. So why are you hugging me as if you thought you might never see me again?”

The expression on Phineas’ face was a very uncomfortable one. “Because I thought I wouldn’t, Candace” he admitted. “Not literally, of course, because your body would still be here, but I was worried the experiment could have killed you. I’ve looked at the results of some of the scans we did before and during your counterpart’s stay here, and they honestly scared me. I… I never should have asked you to be a guinea pig for my experiment. Especially not without Ferb being with me to help.”

I blinked uncomfortably. Death was something I hadn’t really given all that much consideration to during my stay in the other dimension, which had been more occupied by my quest to get home and my determination to prove to Other Phineas and Isabella, the world, and most importantly myself that my brother and I were meant to be together. Actually (and embarrassingly), looking back I think I spent more time on that than on actually trying to get home.

As I looked at my concerned brother’s face, a thought occurred to me and I actually let out a small chuckle. “Well, at least now you know how I felt.”

At seeing his completely confused expression, I explained myself. “Back in the day, when you and Ferb were building stuff in the backyard – before, and even after we got together. Maybe _especially_ after we got together, because then I knew your inventions were as safe as they could be, and you knew about my concerns about them and you’d taken care of it, but I still worried. I tried not to let it show but I think I always remained a little bit scared about you getting hurt, and that I could lose you like I’d lost everything else. And as your older sister, I felt responsible for keeping you safe even though I knew you could do a perfectly good job by yourself. That is how _I_ felt, back in the day, and that’s precisely how _you’re_ feeling now and you’re just as wrong as I was, because if I know you you’d probably taken a lot of safety precautions and the mind transmitter never had a big chance of killing me, but the thought that it could have won’t get out of your mind. What do the statistics say?”

“Even at the worst stage in the process, there was only about a nine percent chance of a fatal outcome” Phineas admitted. “But nine percent is too much, Candace. You’re still so young, the kids need you, I need you… you shouldn’t be in a situation where you could have died because I messed up and I wasn’t able to keep you safe.”

I gently stroked my brother’s red hair. “Welcome to the club” I whispered in his ear. “Look, Phineas – I’m back. What’s done is done. I’m not going to deny that there might be lessons to draw for the future but for now, can I just have a lover who is happy that we’re together again?”

Phineas hesitated, but then he kissed me. “I _am_ happy you’re back, Candace” he whispered, pressing me close to him. “It’s been nearly a week, and ordinarily I could deal with missing you that long but I lost you so abruptly, so randomly…”

I smiled comfortingly at him, just intensely happy to be in his arms again. “You really did miss me, didn’t you?” I said softly.

Phineas returned the smile. “What gave it away?”

“The way you’re looking at me” I replied. “I know your facial expressions and you haven’t looked at me like that for some time now.” Smirking mischievously, I added: “And of course I can feel it in your pants.”

The awkward look on his face as he hastily broke off the hug and took a step back was another one of those little details I wouldn’t ever want to miss again. “Candace,” he said uncomfortably, “we’re in _public_.”

I snorted, taking a step forward so that we were standing opposite each other again. “What happened to me being the cautious one while I was gone? Not to mention that we may be at the lab, but we _are_ in your secluded basement. No one could see us here.” I was ready to return Phineas’ kiss when something in his eyes caught me off-guard. He was clearly looking behind me, and an uncomfortable truth settled in my mind. Dreading what I would find but already suspecting it, I slowly let go of my brother and turned around.

The face of Baljeet Tjinder as he looked at us then is one I’ll never forget. “Funny – even knowing now that you two are intimately involved, it is completely another thing to see it in the flesh” he mused. “Welcome back, Candace.”

I just stared at him and back to my brother, who had a sheepish expression on his face as if he wanted to be anywhere but here right now… and I could tell it wasn’t because of our PDA. This was supposed to be a happy moment, so I tried to swallow the disappointment that I felt because we’d always kept our secret limited to a circle of friends, and now Phineas had informed Baljeet after all those years… I supposed it could simply have been that he needed his help in Ferb’s absence, but even so…

“I couldn’t save you alone” Phineas eventually spoke up, confirming my suspicions. “Your counterpart became impatient and homesick, and she didn’t understand my insistence on not telling someone who was, as far as she knew, one of my closest friends. She really had a hard time settling in, and eventually she figured that if I wasn’t going to take action she would have to do it herself. Baljeet showed up here yesterday morning after Other Candace had contacted him the day before, and he figured out that we were together pretty soon afterwards. I don’t think in the end I could have done it without him, not so quickly at least.”

I nodded thoughtfully, focusing on the man before me that I had seen so many times over the years but hadn’t spoken to in a long while. “And you’re… okay with this?” I said carefully.

Baljeet looked pained. “I would not say that I am, but I doubt my objections are going to stop you from doing… well, whatever it was you were planning to do before Phineas alerted you to my presence.” Okay, _now_ my brother was blushing because of our very public affection, and I suspected my own face was getting red as well. “And either way, they are irrelevant to your rescue. You two were my friends once, and I do not let my friends down.”

I nodded. “Thank you” I said softly. “For… well, for everything, I guess.”

“You’re welcome” Baljeet replied. He still looked awkward, and glanced at the clock. “I suppose you two have a lot to talk about now” he continued. “I should really be going back home to Ginger, anyway.”

He turned around and started to walk towards the exit, and I spoke up before I even realized what I was doing. “Wait, Baljeet,” I hesitated, but he had already turned around, “you’re still in contact with Buford, right?” He nodded. “You two… and Ginger too, of course… you should come over some time. To catch up. I think it’s about time Phineas and I came clean about our relationship.”

The guys in the room both looked surprised, but Baljeet recovered first. “I’ll do that” he replied. “We will get in touch with you about the date.”

“Looking forward to it.” I watched as he left the room, and then turned back to my brother. “Can you help me get back on my feet? I don’t know whether I feel up to walking on my own yet.”

“Well, I did just give your counterpart a sleeping pill about an hour ago” Phineas replied. “It’s hardly surprising to hear that you’re still drowsy.” He put an arm around my shoulder and allowed me to lean on him as I walked for a few steps before feeling confident enough to restrict myself to merely holding his hand. Of course ever-curious Phineas chose that moment to speak up again. “But about Baljeet…”

I nodded. “I talked to your counterpart in the other dimension, and it seemed that there are a lot of things in his life that aren’t in yours – and that includes a lot of positive things, like having friends beyond our family, rather than just having Isabella for a wife.” I couldn’t help the scowl on my face. “She did tell you about Isabella, didn’t she?”

Phineas smiled. “Of course. It’s hardly a subject we could have missed.” He shook his head. “It’s a really weird thought to consider. I’ve always liked Isabella as a friend, of course, and I guess I could see myself being happy with her, but I can’t imagine pining after her the way she pined after me… or even the way I was crushing on you. My character must have been fundamentally different in the other dimension. In that light, I’m surprised your counterpart and I didn’t argue _more_.”

“You do know that your other self only got a crush on her in high school, don’t you?” I said. “And Isabella seems to have had the same crush she had in our dimension. My guess would be that in the other universe your feelings for me either weren’t as strong as they were in our world, or you simply didn’t realize them, or they developed in a different way… any way, that meant that by the time I went off to high school, I was still with Jeremy Johnson, and you… well, I guess you noticed that Isabella was good-looking, and that naturally lead you onto a different path.”

“Oh, that makes sense” Phineas replied thoughtfully. “It’s strange, though, because based on what your other self said I’d thought Isabella and my positions had simply been swapped, with me having the crush and her being oblivious to it. Then again, Other Dimension Candace and I never did talk all that much about it. Or about anything, really.”

I frowned. “Why not?” Even as I asked the question, my mind – or rather, my own words to Other Dimension Phineas earlier that week – already filled in the answer. _I would absolutely expect my own counterpart to flip._ And judging from the quick chat we had in the limbo between dimensions, that was exactly what she’d done.

Phineas sighed, clearly uncomfortable. “Well, we didn’t start off on the best of terms anyway” he said. “She’d been expecting Jeremy to be next to her when she woke up that night, and then she found me. I realized that she was from another universe, but then I had to explain why I was there and she didn’t take too well to that. She was uncomfortable around me for the rest of the night, and judging from tonight’s outburst she never really let go of that, she just hid it a lot better. I mean, I had noticed how argumentative she was, but I seriously thought she was adapting well.”

“Okay. So what happened tonight?” I pressed. “You’re making it sound like something extremely dramatic took place.”

“Well, I guess it was pretty dramatic” Phineas admitted. “I wanted to take her bowling with the kids because I felt a little guilty for everything I’d put her through, but halfway through we ran into Jeremy and Vanessa. She started talking to him and I tried to stop it because she was making them uncomfortable, and then she snapped. She accused me of trying to see her as a replacement for you because apparently I’d been looking weirdly at her, and she said that I’d deliberately been trying to annoy her ever since I was a kid. I – I’m not gonna lie, that kinda hurt. I guess she did have a point, though, because I have been staring at her a lot especially after I’d found out just how badly I messed up with the mind transmitter.”

If my counterpart was here, I’d shove her against the wall and smack her in the face. Repeatedly. But since she wasn’t, just clenching and unclenching my fists would have to do. That, and staying close to Phineas to make sure no one could traumatize him again.

I was focusing so much on not freaking out over my counterpart that I hadn’t actually noticed that Phineas had moved away. He returned carrying his cell phone. “It just occurred to me that it might be best to call the kids right away and let them know you’re unharmed” he said softly.

The kids. Oh my goodness, the kids. How had I forgotten about them? Well, I suppose I had been a little distracted ever since returning home, and it had only been a few minutes. I watched with anticipation and a touch of nervousness as Phineas called our home number. It was barely a moment before Amanda answered. “Dad, is that you?”

Her voice sounded frantic, and Phineas gave me a small smile. “Yep!” he replied, sounding so vibrant and full of life that I wondered whether he had just managed to wash off all the worries and melodramas of the past hours. Could he… he was Phineas, of course he could. (Still couldn’t hurt to keep a close eye on how he was feeling over the next couple of days, though.) “Your mom’s back! Took us some work to pull it off, but she’s here and she’s all right.”

“Mom?” I smiled at Amanda’s wonder. “Right here, sweetie.” I’d missed her and her brother more than I had realized. Somehow the pang in my heart at hearing her voice, my own daughter’s voice again, made me feel almost a little bit relieved. I hadn’t just been obsessed with Phineas and our relationships all the time. I had been separated from my kids for days, and I was genuinely glad to be back with them.

“Wait, Mom is back?” I heard Xavier rush towards the phone, accompanied with a sound of… I don’t know, _some_ thing falling on the floor. “Mom! I’m so glad you’re home… are you all right?”

I chuckled. “I’m fine, Xavier” I replied, despite knowing he wouldn’t quite believe it until he saw it for himself. “Your Dad and I are just about to leave work, so we should be back home soon. You’ll take care of the welcoming party, right Amanda?”

“It depends” Amanda said playfully. “Do you just want a few pieces of wrapping paper lying around with a cardboard sign saying ‘welcome home Mom’ or do you want a big Dad and Uncle Ferb/Xavier and Fred style party?”

“Probably not the last one,” I replied, “as it would take too much time to clean up again and we are going to go on holiday in a couple of days.” I took advantage of their surprised silence to slip in a ‘see you’ before nodding to Phineas to end the call. My brother was looking curiously at me now, and I suppose I couldn’t blame him. I shrugged, trying to appear casual as I walked ahead towards the elevator. “What? You deserve it. The kids deserve it. Maybe it’s time we started living a little more freely here. We can’t let fear of discovery ruin our lives forever.”

Phineas frowned. “Okay, now you’ve got to tell me about what happened in the other dimension” he replied. “What did you discover at Jeremy’s house that made you change your tune so much?”

I sighed, figuring that this would be as good a time as any to spill the beans – and that was something I was going to do, because unlike my counterpart I was not a hypocrite, and I’d just spent days telling them all to be more open to each other. “I didn’t actually spend much time at Jeremy’s at all” I replied. “I sought you out within the first hours of the first day, and that’s when I came into contact with the fact that you were with Isabella. You had a daughter together, and you loved her, and you could be open about that much more than you ever can with Xave and Mandy here. I… I just felt uncomfortable about the whole idea that there could be good things to you dating Isabella, and after telling your counterpart the whole truth about us I asked for his side of the story. He told me this bizarre tale about how he’d gotten together with Isabella, I tried to point out the flaws in it, and at a certain point I guess I really went too far in wanting him to hook up with the other me instead. We had an argument, and it took a full day before the rift was healed. But I just kept thinking about their relationship afterwards, and the fact that… I don’t know, it just couldn’t be. I mean, Isabella and you? I mean, we all know that was never going to happen…”

“But it did, didn’t it?” Phineas said softly, stepping closer towards me again. “Candace, I don’t pretend I understand why my other self apparently ended up in a relationship with Isabella. But you shouldn’t have tried to turn them against each other. It’s their life.”

“I know, I know!” I exclaimed. “That’s what your other self said. But… I just couldn’t let it lie there, Phineas. I couldn’t accept that in another world we weren’t together, because that means that maybe we weren’t meant to be, but we’re just a quirk, an oddity amongst all of those dimensions, and why are we even together?”

Phineas frowned. “Well, I would think that we’re together because you love me and I love you” he said. “Isn’t that kind of how relationships work?”

I bashed my head against his chest, something I’d wanted to do in a long time. “Of course I love you, and I want to be with you. But I… I never quite knew whether it was right, or justified, and I think that’s really why I wanted to break them up the most – that I just wasn’t sure about my own life. And that is just so messed up. I mean, we’ve been together for how long again?”

“It’ll be twenty-five years in October” Phineas murmured.                                          

“Exactly. Twenty-five years, that’s ten times longer than I ever spent with Jeremy Johnson, and yet…” I sighed. “It’s not about you, though, believe me. You’re everything I could have ever asked for and more. It’s just the whole incest thing, and for the past two decades whenever I did feel unsure I’ve been telling myself that it’s okay, because this was meant to happen, right?” I managed a small smile. “But then I come across this world in which I’m not with you but with Jeremy, and it could have been literally anyone else in his place and it still would have sent the message that you’re _not_ my universal, unambiguous soul mate, that you and I were _not_ meant to happen, and only if their relationship is so messed up that it would be clear our world was superior can I convince myself that I couldn’t have taken a different path. I mean, our sibling relationship has caused us so much trouble and is likely to cause some more, so I just wanted assurances to know I was doing the right thing, and that is messed up because I’ve been with you for twenty years and if I still feel uncertain about that then we’re more dysfunctional than they could ever be, and I do love you, we just haven’t been expressing it to each other all that much anymore, it’s just been so much of a routine lately. I mean, when was the last time we even told each other ‘I love you’?”

Phineas frowned. “Just now?”

I gave him a look. “Okay, so maybe we do say we love each other in dramatic situations like this. But in our day-to-day life, I think we haven’t said it for a while now.”

“Oh, I see.” Phineas pondered that for a second. “Well, I wouldn’t be able to tell you for sure, but you may have a point there. We still say it, but not as many times as we once used to.”

“Right?” I said, my nerves so on edge that I was feeling lightheaded even though I hadn’t had a drop to drink. “That’s my whole point. We’ve fallen into a normal, boring routine, and they’ve also got a normal, boring routine, and it’s like they’re interchangeable but if they’re interchangeable why are we committing incest and they’re not, and there’s a whole world out there in which I’m with _Jeremy_ and you’re with _Isabella_ ,” I emphasized the name of our ex-crushe(r)s to make clear how ridiculous it was, “and it looks like with all their troubles they’re still making it work, and they can’t make it work, they have to be horrible and we have to be amazing but we’re not, we’ve become too normal over the years, and now I’m questioning you and myself about all this and I feel so terrible about it and, and…”

“Candace,” Phineas said softly. “Haven’t you always wanted us to be normal?”

“Yes!” I stuttered. “I mean, no! I mean… I just don’t know anymore, okay?” I sighed, feeling Phineas’ arms fold around my waist. “Their relationships were clearly flawed, but they still cared about each other. Why couldn’t they have been a dysfunctional mess with people who hated each other. Or an homicidal crime gang. It would have been so much _easier_ if they’d been an homicidal crime gang.”

“Candace, listen to me.” My brother looked back at me, and for a moment he just seemed so much younger (and yet wiser) than his thirty-eight years. “Don’t you think _I_ have moments where I wish that everything was normal again, the way it was before we got together, and that I could just be on my own for a while, happily inventing away with no relationships or secrets to worry about? I have those moments of doubt too, sis. But I never indulge in them for more than a few seconds because I know – better than you do, apparently – that you love me. And I love you, and I love the kids. And I don’t know if that’s good enough for our counterparts in the other dimension in _their_ fractured relationships,” he placed a soft kiss on my cheek, “but I do know it is good enough for me.”

I pressed my head against his chest.  “You’re so _perfect_.”

Phineas shook his head and chuckled, patting me on the back of my head. “No I’m not.”

“Phineas.” I looked up at him, our faces inches apart. “I’m sure that by tomorrow, I’ll already be complaining again about you forgetting to put your clothes away or turning my toothbrush into a robot without asking. Just relish in the fact that for once, I’m calling you perfect.”

My brother smiled awkwardly, a blush on his cheeks. “Well, okay then.”

He was so cute when he blushed. Twenty-five years on, and he was still cute when he was embarrassed. It was another thing that made me feel a little bit better about our relationship.

“Are you ready to go home, Candace?” he softly murmured into my ear.

“I… I think so” I replied. “But there’s still definitely more that I have to tell you, though. We’re in love – might as well share all my insecurities right now and regale you with every single aspect of my flaws. I mean, it’s not like you’re not familiar with them, but you might want a reminder on why you getting together with me was such a crazy idea.”

Phineas chuckled, having recognized the deadpan tone. “That’s what I’m here for, Candace” he said. “Go ahead. Let it all out. I have to get a couple of papers from my office anyway, so that leaves enough room for us to talk.”

I stared at him and shook my head with a small smile as I followed him into the elevator. “You’re imperturbable, aren’t you?” I quipped. “You never complain, and I always do, but it never really gets to you. You just don’t let it, no matter what I do to you. No matter what my counterpart does to you. You’re such a dork. You should really stop letting people – including me – walking over you, Phineas.”

Phineas snorted. “What, so when you call me a dork, I call you an idiot?”

I shook my head. “That’s not what I meant and you know it… wait, do you think I’m an idiot?” It was odd to feel how those insecurities could be suppressed through time and effort, and yet they surfaced surprisingly easily when I was confronted with them.

“Hardly, but I do think you’re prone to making some stupid decisions” Phineas replied. “Like the one about denying our kids a vacation. Even if you seem to have come back on it now, it still wasn’t your brightest idea. We did promise each other to give them a normal childhood back in the day, remember? Keeping them holed up inside all the time probably isn’t the best for their development.”

“Phineas, I barely remember anything from that time, as I was too nervous to be a mother” I pointed out. “Whereas you kept your cool throughout and suddenly flipped on the day of Mandy’s birth.”

“Hey, it was a huge change to my life!” Phineas insisted. “I’d always been free to do whatever I wanted to do whenever I wanted to, and suddenly having a daughter I was responsible for really shook me up.”

“Well, you had been responsible for me for a lot of time” I remarked. “Not quite the same thing, but you can’t say you weren’t prepared. You’d had a lot of practice for raising a kid just by keeping track of me… and to a certain extent vice-versa.”

Phineas frowned, walking ahead towards his office while shaking his head. “Candace, now you’re making this weird.”

“It doesn’t _get_ much weirder than us” I said. “Either way, I agree that you and the kids deserve more out of life than what you’ve gotten thus far. We can’t hide in the shadows forever, and if that requires taking a few more risks that people will find out about us… well, what’s the worst that could happen? You meeting a pretty girl just over half my age probably carries more consequences than a gossip journalist getting lucky. ”

My brother let out a deep, long-suffering sigh. “Candace…”

“I’m joking, I’m joking” I hastened to reassure him. And then, because this was a night on which truths had a way of coming out anyway, I added: “Although I do wonder how much my actions in the other world were influenced by jealousy.”

“Candace, I demoted Kirsty for you” Phineas replied, shaking his head. “I don’t know what more I could do.”

“I don’t want you to do any more than that, I just… feel that way, I guess” I said. “I mean, I know you love me and you’re loyal to me, but I’m never going to like Kirsty or anyone else looking at you that way. I don’t know why, but that’s a prejudice I can’t seem to overcome. Busting was one thing, but this is just too big a mountain to climb. And hey, if I’d flirt with some other guy you would be jealous too, wouldn’t you?”

Phineas snorted. “I know you’re not going to flirt with some other guy, Candace. And the mountain is only too big to climb if you don’t set your mind to it.”   

“Maybe, maybe” I replied. “But I wouldn’t count on being able to overcome insecurities that I haven’t been able to overcome in twenty years. Not to mention that even if I did really feel threatened by Kirsty, it’s not like it’s a _completely_ irrational fear, you know. There are lots of older guys who hook up with younger women, and there are younger girls who have crushes on older men.”

Phineas shook his head. “Candace, I know you know me well enough by now to be able to tell that I’m not like ‘lots of guys’. If I was, I would have married Isabella.”

My initial reaction was to share his chuckle, as I usually did, but then I sighed and frowned. “Don’t you see? This is exactly what I meant. We used to be able to laugh about this.”

Phineas frowned. “Candace, you don’t think I’m about to leave you for Isabella just because my counterpart married her, do you? Because I could think of half a dozen reasons right where why that would be a phenomenally bad idea.”

“Name them again for me?”

“It wouldn’t be fair to our kids, or to her kids” Phineas ticked off. “Ferb would be left all alone. They would have to get a divorce which could get tricky because of her Jewish religion. Me getting together with a previously married woman would cause a scandal. No one in our family would understand. Isabella and my characters would clash if we were together, as your stories from the other dimension seem to point out. Oh, and then there’s this last detail – I don’t love her. _I love you_.”

“Fair enough” I said, smiling faintly. “I know that, and I couldn’t live without you either. But it seemed so real in the other dimension, and you weren’t there, and my other self and I had this whole fight about whether he should get together with his Candace and all of a sudden I started worrying again even though I didn’t want to, and maybe this is an issue we’ll never be able to resolve, but I… I didn’t know what to do. I know I teased you earlier about missing me, but I was the one who really felt alone out there.”

Phineas looked at me sympathetically and took my hand. “Did you really miss me that much?”

I sighed. “I missed you so much that I let your counterpart win in Skiddley Whiffers the first night after we had that argument just so that he wouldn’t walk out on me again.”

Phineas smirked. “ _You_ let someone else win in Skiddley Whiffers? Wow. Are you sure he didn’t legitimately beat you?”

“He was way behind me in the first part of the game,” I spluttered. “I had to deliberately throw three ones in a row just to get us on an equal footing again. I know, I probably would have tried to claim that I’d let him win even if he _had_ beaten me, but this time I really did.”

My brother laughed. “It’s all right, Candace. I believe you.”

We were silent for a moment as we walked out of the building, ready to go home, and I pondered those words. Phineas believed me and supported me, like he had always done over the past twenty years. Maybe that was the biggest difference between us and Other Candace and Jeremy, or Other Phineas and Isabella. Phineas always had my back, and I tried to have his. I wasn’t so sure whether everything worked so smoothly in the other dimension.

“So…” Phineas said as we got to the car, reminding me all of a sudden of that day so long and simultaneously such a short time ago when we’d stepped into the car to get home, not realizing that I’d be taken out of my home dimension that very night and transported into a weird and dangerous place, leaving me unable to get back for a long, long time. It made me all the more enthusiastic about the realization that tonight I would be able to sleep in my own bed again, where I would finally be able to wrap my arms around my brother and not let go of him again for the rest of the night. You know, among other things.

I’d been so caught up in those thoughts that I had missed Phineas’ actual question and came to that realization when I caught him staring at me. “I’m sorry, what did you say?”

Phineas gave me a good-natured sigh. “I was wondering whether at the end of this whole adventure, there are things you think we should do differently from now on” he replied. “I think I should definitely keep from making major projects when Ferb isn’t here, and certainly not do anything that puts you in any danger. Also, I ought to be more alert on how I act around others, and how and why they act a certain way around me. I think that could have prevented a lot of the problems we had with our counterparts. Finally, I should put some effort into getting back into contact with old friends, and we should take more time to really be parents to the kids, even if that does involve taking a few risks with our hidden relationship. What do you think?”

“Those… seem like good things to do, I guess” I replied. “I think I should probably give you more space for all of that. To trust you more, not just with maintaining our secret to the people we don’t want it to slip out to, but also with revealing it to the people you do want to tell. Like I said before, you don’t talk back to me enough. I don’t think it’s anywhere near as bad as the other you and Isabella – I think he was actually repressing his feelings a lot and they got into arguments about it without ever really getting to the heart of the matter. You don’t feel like you have to repress your feelings around me, do you?”

Phineas snorted. “Not in the slightest.”

“Good.” I got into the car on the passenger’s side and watched as my brother activated it and drove it off the parking lot. I couldn’t help but cast a glance over my shoulder at Flynn-Fletcher Incorporated – hey, there had been a possibility I would never see it again, okay - before I continued. “But I still think that because of me telling you so many times that our relationship should be secret, you haven’t told as many people as you would have otherwise, and you know, maybe I should trust you on that. No matter how much of an oblivious dork you once were,” I had to resist the urge to ruffle his hair while he was driving, “you’ve grown up a lot since we were kids.”

Phineas smiled at me. “So, anything more?”

“I should really get over my jealousy issues” I ticked off. “As far as that’s possible. And… well, I think that’s basically it. Trust you more, spend more time with the kids, allow you to spend more time with the kids… I think openness is probably the key. We should never have to feel like we can’t or shouldn’t talk to each other if something is wrong. I think I have felt that way in the past. I… I didn’t want to raise more problems. You helped me deal with a lot of my flaws, so to find out that they were still there so many years on… I think I just wasn’t sure how you’d react. You would gladly help me of course, but even you’re not saintly enough that it won’t wear you out under the surface. You’ve been so good to me, and I don’t want to take advantage of you.”

“Candace, what did you just tell me about the things you had to complain about, like with the toothbrushes, and when I forget dates, or when you think I trust too many people?” Phineas shook his head. “You’re not taking advantage of me anymore than I’m taking advantage of you for continuing to put up with that – and if I should ever change my mind on that, I’ll tell you about it. Maybe that’s one more thing that I have to learn, that we both have to learn, that we’ll always have flaws and we can’t always take out the positive and eliminate the negative. We aren’t perfect, but we’ve always accepted that from each other. As long as that’s the case, who cares what our counterparts think? It’s not important. We’re happy, and we’ll stay happy until the end of our lives together.”

“But… but… but…” I stammered, suddenly disturbed by the confidence expressed in that last sentence. “But it can’t be that simple! It’s never that simple! Life doesn’t work that way, Phineas. Things change, and everything you care about can just disappear overnight if you make a small mistake…”

Phineas shrugged. “That could happen sometimes, I guess” he agreed. “But that doesn’t mean you can’t undo those mistakes and get the things you care about back. Why does that idea make you so upset all of a sudden?”

I bit my lip. “Because all good things in my life seem to have a tendency to disappear” I whispered. “I’ve known that since I was a little girl. You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me, you and the kids, and you’re the only one who has the patience to understand me. I don’t want to think about you getting enamored by another woman, and I know you love me, but… on some level, I can’t help but think that it simply can’t work out that way. Everything goes away. Everyone leaves. Remember our biological Dad? Remember how everything you built was always gone by the end of the day before I could bust you guys? Heck, remember my relationship with Jeremy? Nothing lasts forever.”

Phineas put his hand on mine. “Except us” he said simply. “Candace, I’ve already seen you at your worst so many times. If I had wanted to end our relationship I would have done so ages ago – heck, I wouldn’t have even started it. Remember when you told me the truth about busting? I did break up with you then, but we got _through_ that one and we came back together. If some small voice at the back of your head still says that there’s even the slightest possibility that I could leave you now, just because another version of myself didn’t end up with you, then that voice is mad.”

I sighed. “Are you sure we’re doing the right thing, Phineas?”

“We’ve argued at length about that when we first got together and that entire first year after our relationship started” Phineas pointed out. “We’ve always had only the best intentions with it, and we never took it lightly. That’s got to count for something, right?”

“If you say so” I said.

Phineas smiled softly at me. “It’s a difficult dilemma, I know, but the arguments we had to stay together then are certainly no less valid now. And…” he stopped the car in front of our house and tooted the horn – brazenly, without regard for any of the neighbors who might be watching us, and for the moment I didn’t care, as we’d deal with that when that time came. “I think we managed to add two more since.”

And as our kids ran out of our house to greet us, I knew exactly what he meant. Feeling the love of my children as they hugged me and Phineas’ affectionate smile as he joined in made me realize that in our relationship, the good outweighed the bad by far. Sure, we still have issues, but even those are minor in comparison with those that torment other peoples’ relationships, including those of our other selves. What mattered is that after twenty years, we can still hold passionate speeches about how we love each other, that we miss each other deeply when the other is gone, and that together, we are a family and we can feel at home.

Who cares about our counterparts.

We have each other. And that is enough.


End file.
